Release me from this burden!!!

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M

Mac10

Guest
#1
#1
I've been in an emotional relation for over three years with a woman and this needs to stop like yesterday.
Believe me I won't go onto deep and a mean deep details but the connection and bond seems unbreakable.
Yes I'm married and she is not. Every time a try to break this off I feel so guilty because it will be a train wreck for her to lose me forever. I know I can make it thru this and hopefully she will will also and move on with her life.
So the question is HOW again / do I call her? / Text her / or go cold turkey and just cut her off at the snap of a finger.
Please don't be simple in your responses tell me like it is I need to hear it.
May God bless each and everyone of you on this blessed day
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#2
Feb 21, 2014
70,940
9,691
113
#2
I'm a person who tells it like I see it, so here it is. You are married, and having a 3-year affair with another woman? Not only is that adultery, but it's also a sin, and a real marriage killer. You need to end it with this woman TODAY. No calls, no texts, no visits. End it, period. You're worried about HER life being a train wreck?!! Buddy, your own life is a train wreck in progress!! You better start putting your WIFE (remember her?) and your MARRIAGE, above your lover. You need to admit your infidelity to your wife, tell her you're sorry and BEG her and God for forgiveness. This woman WILL get through losing you. However, YOU better worry about not losing your marriage over this stupidity.. :/
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#3
#3
Why don't you divorce your wife?
 
M

Mac10

Guest
#4
#4
Thank you for your direct response I hear loud and clear. There is no physical contact with her since she lives states away.
God bless you my sister in Christ.
 
M

Mac10

Guest
#5
#5
Because after 34 years of marriage I feel committed to her and should be. I took my vows before the Lord for better or worst. Life isn't easy with all the ups and downs but we strive each day to better ourselves thru the grace of God.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#6
Feb 21, 2014
70,940
9,691
113
#6
Ariel82 said:
Why don't you divorce your wife?
Click to expand...
Ariel, no offense but are you nuts?! He's married, having an affair and you think he should divorce his wife to be with his lover?!! NOOOO!! He needs to dump his lover at the curb, and return to his marriage..
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#7
Feb 21, 2014
70,940
9,691
113
#7
Mac10 said:
Because after 34 years of marriage I feel committed to her and should be. I took my vows before the Lord for better or worst. Life isn't easy with all the ups and downs but we strive each day to better ourselves thru the grace of God.
Click to expand...
​Throwing away 34 years of marriage would be pretty stupid on your part. Sorry if I sound harsh but you DID say you want the raw truth..lol ..You're right, you SHOULD be committed to your marriage and your wife. You have no obligation to your lover at all. Life isn't meant to be easy, neither is marriage. But we need to persevere through and not give in during tough times, OR turn to someone else for comfort. Turn to GOD, not another woman. :)
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#8
#8
I didn't say he should. Just reminded him why he hasn't.
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#9
#9
No problem. I will pray for you. You should introduce her to you wife.

Before anyone jumps me, let me explain.

When I first accepted Jesus into my life and began doing what I felt God told me to do, which was comfort those in need, weep with those who weep, be an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on.

I found people were attracted to me, but I realized early on it wasn't me personally but Christ's light shining through me. I knew many of the young single men were confused by that (i was single too at the time) but over time they became like brothers to me.

That's how God wants us to be. Brothers and sisters in Christ.

There is only one flesh of my flesh, none of my bone.

If you can break the bond, then change it to a sisterly tie and include your wife into the relationship. Maybe God will place someone in her life who is single and loves her as much as you should,love your wife.

However avoid temptation. Be open and honest...
 
A

Ariel82

Guest
#10
#10
Sorry typos....bone of my bone......if you can not break.....
 
C

coby

Guest
#11
#11
Mac10 said:
I've been in an emotional relation for over three years with a woman and this needs to stop like yesterday.
Believe me I won't go onto deep and a mean deep details but the connection and bond seems unbreakable.
Yes I'm married and she is not. Every time a try to break this off I feel so guilty because it will be a train wreck for her to lose me forever. I know I can make it thru this and hopefully she will will also and move on with her life.
So the question is HOW again / do I call her? / Text her / or go cold turkey and just cut her off at the snap of a finger.
Please don't be simple in your responses tell me like it is I need to hear it.
May God bless each and everyone of you on this blessed day
Click to expand...
My ex did that, chatting with a woman from the States. If you just break it off your marriage can be healed. You have an unhealthy emotional bond now and need to break all contact and the soul ties. She doesn't need you, she needs Jesus. If you keep on talking to her she sins so if you love her like Jesus does simply cut it off.
 
C

coby

Guest
#12
#12
Ariel82 said:
No problem. I will pray for you. You should introduce her to you wife.

Before anyone jumps me, let me explain.

When I first accepted Jesus into my life and began doing what I felt God told me to do, which was comfort those in need, weep with those who weep, be an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on.

I found people were attracted to me, but I realized early on it wasn't me personally but Christ's light shining through me. I knew many of the young single men were confused by that (i was single too at the time) but over time they became like brothers to me.

That's how God wants us to be. Brothers and sisters in Christ.

There is only one flesh of my flesh, none of my bone.

If you can break the bond, then change it to a sisterly tie and include your wife into the relationship. Maybe God will place someone in her life who is single and loves her as much as you should,love your wife.

However avoid temptation. Be open and honest...
Click to expand...
I don't think that will work. Lol if my ex had done that I would have smashed her head in.
 
N

NewWine

Guest
#13
#13
You a married man, began an adulterous relationship with another woman. This woman entered into a relationship with a married man.
Drop her like the bad habit she is.
Don't call, Don't text, don't email. In fact BLOCK HER from everything! You owe your wife, not another woman.
 
N

NewWine

Guest
#14
#14
And pray. Focus on God to get yourself back together.
 
J

jbk1203

Guest
#15
#15
Ariel82 said:
Why don't you divorce your wife?
Click to expand...
"I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery."

Matthew 19:9
 
K

kaylagrl

Guest
#16
#16
Ariel82 said:
Why don't you divorce your wife?
Click to expand...
His wife isn't in the wrong,he is. She is the one that has the Biblical right to divorce him,not the other way round. Very bad advice.
 
blue_ladybug

blue_ladybug

Senior Member
#17
Feb 21, 2014
70,940
9,691
113
#17
kaylagrl said:
His wife isn't in the wrong,he is. She is the one that has the Biblical right to divorce him,not the other way round. Very bad advice.
Click to expand...

Wifey doesn't know about his affair.. :/
 
K

kaylagrl

Guest
#18
#18
Mac10 said:
I've been in an emotional relation for over three years with a woman and this needs to stop like yesterday.
Believe me I won't go onto deep and a mean deep details but the connection and bond seems unbreakable.
Yes I'm married and she is not. Every time a try to break this off I feel so guilty because it will be a train wreck for her to lose me forever. I know I can make it thru this and hopefully she will will also and move on with her life.
So the question is HOW again / do I call her? / Text her / or go cold turkey and just cut her off at the snap of a finger.
Please don't be simple in your responses tell me like it is I need to hear it.
May God bless each and everyone of you on this blessed day
Click to expand...

You need to break off all contact at once.That's just common sense.What you don't realize is you made her life a train wreck when you began this emotional affair, and your own and your wifes. But you need to be more concerned of how this is affecting your wife because,before God,you made a covenant with her,not with your lover. You are accountable for how you treat your wife even more than this other woman. Do you know what happens to a woman when you break her trust and therefore her heart? You need to forget the other woman completely,she will move on and she's not your concern.Your wife is your concern. The time for guilt is long past. It's time to be a real man and do what you promised to do in your wedding vows. If you're having issues with that,find a Christian counselor and work it out. You'll never ever heal a marriage by turning to someone other than your spouse,it never works.
 
notuptome

notuptome

Senior Member
#19
May 17, 2013
15,050
2,538
113
#19
The camel has his nose under the tent flap. Emotional relationship? Why are you flirting with another woman? Do you not know where that will lead? This is why Jesus said that what a man thinks in his heart toward another woman he has essentially already done.

Get clean and make things right before the Lord. Are you and the other women really Christians? If so the one you have betrayed is the Lord. I hope your wife is a Christian. You have been unfaithful to the people who are important to you so you are in a deep ditch with only one way out.

For the cause of Christ
Roger
 
S

spunkycat08

Senior Member
#20
Dec 7, 2013
403
2
18
#20
Ariel82 said:
No problem. I will pray for you. You should introduce her to you wife.

Before anyone jumps me, let me explain.

When I first accepted Jesus into my life and began doing what I felt God told me to do, which was comfort those in need, weep with those who weep, be an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on.

I found people were attracted to me, but I realized early on it wasn't me personally but Christ's light shining through me. I knew many of the young single men were confused by that (i was single too at the time) but over time they became like brothers to me.

That's how God wants us to be. Brothers and sisters in Christ.

There is only one flesh of my flesh, none of my bone.

If you can break the bond, then change it to a sisterly tie and include your wife into the relationship. Maybe God will place someone in her life who is single and loves her as much as you should,love your wife.

However avoid temptation. Be open and honest...
Click to expand...
Ariel82:

I am a married female in her forties.

Why on earth would anyone, male or female, want to be friends with someone who was having an affair with their spouse?

Their spouse was cheating on them.

Their spouse betrayed them.

The spouse has no idea of what is going on, and you are advising the OP that he/she befriend the person who is having an affair with their spouse?

Please be practical about this.

Please read the link below.

Friends of the Opposite Sex
 
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