Advice
- Thread starter Maranatha925
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My car died a few years ago right smack in the middle of one of the busiest streets in Philadelphia during a blizzard on a Friday night during rush hour and during the Christmas season. (It couldn't have been more inconvenient if it tried for it. And it was totally dead, so couldn't even put on the blinkers.) Lots of people stopped to ask me if I wanted them to call 911. I did. They did, because within 5 minutes (at rush hour traffic in the heart of... well you got the rest, so pretty much most cars couldn't get near me) two cop cars came specifically to get my car off that street.
Last November and December my husband had two heart surgeries -- one emergency and one huge one -- and I don't have the ability to sit around a hospital for more than four hours.
About the same time my Dad, who has late Stage 2 dementia, was doing some really whacky and frightening things (he had already set the wood pile outside on fire earlier that year, but by this time he was falling down stairs bleeding all over and never noticing, or threatening to kill someone -- vague enough that we'll never know if he meant himself or my brother -- with a loaded gun we didn't know where he hid in the house. The main thing we were all trying to accomplish at that time was to keep him safe until he could be committed legally. Since he is so out of it, four out of six of his kids, including me, got 3-20 calls from him per day and we just kept talking to him as long as possible, fully aware that as long as he was talking he wasn't falling down steps, wasn't setting the house on fire, and wasn't shooting anyone or anything.
All that, and I never used my cell phone. Exactly what type of huge emergency are people expecting that they need the comfort of a $100 a month cellphone?
The emergency? Facebook/pinterest/Twitter/Vine is dying for yet another selfie of someone driving their car!
Enough people have cellphones and landlines that if you need to make a call or have someone come to you... it's covered. If it's not? You're foolish to be that far out in the sticks by yourself to begin with.
Last November and December my husband had two heart surgeries -- one emergency and one huge one -- and I don't have the ability to sit around a hospital for more than four hours.
About the same time my Dad, who has late Stage 2 dementia, was doing some really whacky and frightening things (he had already set the wood pile outside on fire earlier that year, but by this time he was falling down stairs bleeding all over and never noticing, or threatening to kill someone -- vague enough that we'll never know if he meant himself or my brother -- with a loaded gun we didn't know where he hid in the house. The main thing we were all trying to accomplish at that time was to keep him safe until he could be committed legally. Since he is so out of it, four out of six of his kids, including me, got 3-20 calls from him per day and we just kept talking to him as long as possible, fully aware that as long as he was talking he wasn't falling down steps, wasn't setting the house on fire, and wasn't shooting anyone or anything.
All that, and I never used my cell phone. Exactly what type of huge emergency are people expecting that they need the comfort of a $100 a month cellphone?
The emergency? Facebook/pinterest/Twitter/Vine is dying for yet another selfie of someone driving their car!
Enough people have cellphones and landlines that if you need to make a call or have someone come to you... it's covered. If it's not? You're foolish to be that far out in the sticks by yourself to begin with.
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Which later on became scrolling down FB.
If you're fully in control you don't slam on your brakes. Feeling "in control" really doesn't compare to what happened. And no one ever feels like they're going to be in a car accident until that unmistakable sound of metal scrapping metal and, possibly, glass breaking. That's why it's called "an accident." Not too many people do that on purpose.
If you're fully in control you don't slam on your brakes. Feeling "in control" really doesn't compare to what happened. And no one ever feels like they're going to be in a car accident until that unmistakable sound of metal scrapping metal and, possibly, glass breaking. That's why it's called "an accident." Not too many people do that on purpose.
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LOL You just admitted you knew he was a bad driver but FB called, so you stopped worrying about it. Like I just said, anticipating other drivers is part of what we have to do. Scrolling FB doesn't give you time to anticipate enough, as you just found out.
If someone isn't paying attention while they're walking and on their cellphones the worse that happens to me is I get a scrape on my arm from the building he/she pushes me into because I didn't anticipate him/her changing directions.
If I'm in a car, the worse that happens is hubby finds out he's a widower. There are old ladies driving nearby belting out Jack and Diane along with Mellencamp. That person is more real than a selfie or a pithy quote on FB.
I still think you should own up to what happened, but I don't think you're a horrible person for it. I also don't think the driver of that other car who ran into my friend's car in college and killed him along with two others was a bad person either. Still. That friend only lived 19 years because of the person.
And I really feel sorry for that driver. He lived! It's 41 years later. I bet he can remember it just as clearly today as he did then. All I want from you is to rethink your position. No, you're not a bad person. You are a bad driver. Be on the good side of the stats for young drivers. If many young drivers are bad drivers, that means others are good drivers. You are a bad driver. Become a good driver. Drive like you're retired and in no hurry to get anywhere. You'll be surprised at the scenery you're missing (and that whacky old lady in her car singing her lungs out but she's so bad you can't even recognize the song. lol)
If someone isn't paying attention while they're walking and on their cellphones the worse that happens to me is I get a scrape on my arm from the building he/she pushes me into because I didn't anticipate him/her changing directions.
If I'm in a car, the worse that happens is hubby finds out he's a widower. There are old ladies driving nearby belting out Jack and Diane along with Mellencamp. That person is more real than a selfie or a pithy quote on FB.
I still think you should own up to what happened, but I don't think you're a horrible person for it. I also don't think the driver of that other car who ran into my friend's car in college and killed him along with two others was a bad person either. Still. That friend only lived 19 years because of the person.
And I really feel sorry for that driver. He lived! It's 41 years later. I bet he can remember it just as clearly today as he did then. All I want from you is to rethink your position. No, you're not a bad person. You are a bad driver. Be on the good side of the stats for young drivers. If many young drivers are bad drivers, that means others are good drivers. You are a bad driver. Become a good driver. Drive like you're retired and in no hurry to get anywhere. You'll be surprised at the scenery you're missing (and that whacky old lady in her car singing her lungs out but she's so bad you can't even recognize the song. lol)
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If the others are on their phones too? That means three drivers are bad drivers. It doesn't let you off the hook. Use a little grace yourself. Defense works better in a car than after the fact. Become a defense driver, instead of defending a bad choice.
It was a bad choice. You're not the first to make a bad choice nor the last, but if you don't learn from the bad choice, you're likely to have to learn from an even badder situation in the future.
It was a bad choice. You're not the first to make a bad choice nor the last, but if you don't learn from the bad choice, you're likely to have to learn from an even badder situation in the future.
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Pssst, you do realize you're responding to someone who thinks you already are in your old age, right?
Age doesn't make you a good or bad driver. My great-aunt took her driving test every six months, not because she had to, but because she kept worrying that someone in her 90's might slip without noticing. Nope. Perfect every time, and she didn't die in a car accident.
Age doesn't make you a good or bad driver. My great-aunt took her driving test every six months, not because she had to, but because she kept worrying that someone in her 90's might slip without noticing. Nope. Perfect every time, and she didn't die in a car accident.
Pssst, you do realize you're responding to someone who thinks you already are in your old age, right?
Age doesn't make you a good or bad driver. My great-aunt took her driving test every six months, not because she had to, but because she kept worrying that someone in her 90's might slip without noticing. Nope. Perfect every time, and she didn't die in a car accident.
Age doesn't make you a good or bad driver. My great-aunt took her driving test every six months, not because she had to, but because she kept worrying that someone in her 90's might slip without noticing. Nope. Perfect every time, and she didn't die in a car accident.
And honestly, is checking fake book while driving, that important to die (or kill) for?
Well, I would think the phone would be an important detail if it was an important detail, did it delay you making a stop longer than you had warning to make the stop regardless. Not talking like .00000000001 seconds of delay, but enough to make a difference in the events? if so, remember before saying it in a court room doing something illegal could make it your fault (which it wasn't, really, if you could go after people for actual fault, both of you should be looking at the guy who stopped abruptly in front of you). But if being on your phone made you not react and you otherwise would have not been hit, you were coincidentally on it and it played no role, if you could have not been hit if you were not on your phone, it is a cause and if you can afford to, you should say something. Only you and any passengers can recall what was happening at the time, so you would have to go through your memory and investigate if the phone was a factor.
Either way going forward you can save yourself this feeling by not using your phone while you drive, since it is causing you to feel this way, regardless of if it even mattered or not.
Either way going forward you can save yourself this feeling by not using your phone while you drive, since it is causing you to feel this way, regardless of if it even mattered or not.