Growth and lack thereof

[Yahweh_is_gracious]

Reposted from a blog entry I just made:

Over the past months, I have been enrolled in a Bible study program under the guidance of a mentor assigned to me to whom I could direct my questions related to my readings and lessons, and he would answer me to the best of his ability.

All in all, it was an experience I've been glad to have had. I completed my program without any hiccups. It was only after the program was concluded that I ran into some issues that I have not as of yet been able to resolve.

My mentor asked me if having now completed the program, would I be willing to meet with other Christians in my area?

I answered "no".

My mentor asked me if having completed the program, would I be interested in having a water baptism and join a congregation?

I answered "no".

I'm not sure exactly why I answered no to both of these questions, but "no" was the only honest answer I could give. Am I not supposed to be honest? If I am, and being honest means that I don't want to meet with other believers in my area and am not interested in being baptized, then what does that mean?

*I post this rhetorically. I don't honestly expect to have a civilized discussion about this topic. The people who would most want to impart advice are the ones I most likely don't need to hear from based on my short time here. I don't think this is a topic anyone can help me with simply because it's a matter of my own faith, or what passes for faith in my crazy little world. I just wanted to put it out there so folks could have a little better idea what kind of stuff I am dealing with.*

 

[Huglife]

Reposted from a blog entry I just made:

Over the past months, I have been enrolled in a Bible study program under the guidance of a mentor assigned to me to whom I could direct my questions related to my readings and lessons, and he would answer me to the best of his ability.

All in all, it was an experience I've been glad to have had. I completed my program without any hiccups. It was only after the program was concluded that I ran into some issues that I have not as of yet been able to resolve.

My mentor asked me if having now completed the program, would I be willing to meet with other Christians in my area?

I answered "no".

My mentor asked me if having completed the program, would I be interested in having a water baptism and join a congregation?

I answered "no".

I'm not sure exactly why I answered no to both of these questions, but "no" was the only honest answer I could give. Am I not supposed to be honest? If I am, and being honest means that I don't want to meet with other believers in my area and am not interested in being baptized, then what does that mean?

*I post this rhetorically. I don't honestly expect to have a civilized discussion about this topic. The people who would most want to impart advice are the ones I most likely don't need to hear from based on my short time here. I don't think this is a topic anyone can help me with simply because it's a matter of my own faith, or what passes for faith in my crazy little world. I just wanted to put it out there so folks could have a little better idea what kind of stuff I am dealing with.*

If you beleive your ready, you should be babtised. Those who are babtized and beleive will be saved.

 

[Ariel82]

Okay.....


I didn't get baptized with water for 10 years because I had issues with trust.

I didn't trust the pastors to be actual followers of God and not wolves and nothing they did or said really made sense to why I should be baptized by water. Many pastors assumed I had been or didn't think it was that important.

Personally I didn't feel the need to be baptized until I felt grounded enough in Christ to proclaim to the world I was His and endure the attacks from the enemy and be a part of His ministry in this world.

Jesus didn't get water baptized until he was 30 and then was tempted for 40 days before starting public ministry....

Anyway, you are in my prayers. Trust is hard. Praying that God surrounds you with people worth trusting and gives you the discernment and courage to make connections ...

 

[Ariel82]

If you beleive your ready, you should be babtised. Those who are babtized and beleive will be saved.

Baptized by the Holy Spirit not water saves...its part of the whole born again message Jesus preached.

 

[Fenner]

My baptism story is weird, or normal when your Mom is Baptist and your Dad was Roman Catholic.

I'm born, the youngest of 6. All siblings already baptized in the Catholic Church. I guess my Mom had free rein over me because I was dedicated at the Baptist church where my Great Grandparents worshiped.

At age 11 my Dad one day says, she needs to be baptized because she and my Brother are going to start going to religious education classes at the Catholic Church we lived by. So I get Godparents and I'm baptized.

Dad dies, I'm 16. Mom starts going to a Baptist church. After a while she says we both need to be baptized. I am baptized, but the baptist church doesn't recognize the Catholic baptism, so they dunk me.

I'm 28 years old and engaged. My Husbands parents didn't go to church. We decide we're going to find a church together. We go to the Presbyterian church. His parents, ok whatever, my Mom, you should go to the baptist church. I never felt comfortable there, no. Husband isn't baptized, wants to be. Question about my baptism comes up, I tell them my history and ask if I need to do it again? No, Presbyterian church recognizes the Catholic baptism.

So that's my weird or not so weird story.

 

[Yahweh_is_gracious]

I feel like getting baptized would be a hollow gesture for me. Even if it is purely a symbolic gesture based on tradition and it's baptism of the Holy Spirit that is important, I don't feel that either. I somehow envy people that have faith. I don't know what that is like.

I have belief, but no faith. What my belief is grounded in is a topic for another time and something that we won't get into at this time, but there is a major difference, at least there is for me, between believing something to be true, and having faith in it. It is, for me, a matter of lack of trust, a lack of commitment, and a lack of commonality with others who see the world and relations with the Divine through the same lens.

 

[Ariel82]

So Fenner, when did you feel God's Holy Spirit leading you?

John the Baptist is said to have been moved by the spirit and jump when Jesus approached while they were both in the womb.

However most people can remember when God touched their lives and gave them faith in Jesus redeeming work on the cross....


Don't have to share, just curious if you choose to answer.

 

[Fenner]

As you can see from my post my dedication and baptisms were decided by my parents. I did have my kid's baptized as babies and I wish I would have had them dedicated. I would have liked to have made the decision myself and I took that away from my kid's too. I guess if they feel inclined to do it as adults they can do it again.

My Grandma wasn't baptized until she was 85, she believed in God but for whatever reason didn't do it until then. You'll know when you're ready.

 

[Ariel82]

I feel like getting baptized would be a hollow gesture for me. Even if it is purely a symbolic gesture based on tradition and it's baptism of the Holy Spirit that is important, I don't feel that either. I somehow envy people that have faith. I don't know what that is like.

I have belief, but no faith. What my belief is grounded in is a topic for another time and something that we won't get into at this time, but there is a major difference, at least there is for me, between believing something to be true, and having faith in it. It is, for me, a matter of lack of trust, a lack of commitment, and a lack of commonality with others who see the world and relations with the Divine through the same lens.

Sometimes when you are hurt, the world turns gray and it's hard to have faith in anything.

I remember the scriptures that say when we are faithless, God is faithful.

It toke me a long time to trust God and I tested Him alot. Prayed and asked Him a ton of questions.

I don't have any answers. Truthfully just keeping you company. I will stick around a while and pray with you.

When my lamp is burning low, i just wait until God adds some oil.

Saw your signature...we aren't a part of this world, our home is with God in Heaven. We all struggle to understand others and ourselves...some people we connect more easily with than others...some we may never understand...expectations and wishes, I used to struggle with that...now I just focus on what God expects and the rest falls into place....will pray that you have strength and wisdom to overcome your struggles with God's help.

 

[Yahweh_is_gracious]

When you are like me, and have very little access to emotions or the ability to express them like others or to understand them, either from yourself or especially from others, it's difficult to reason why some people have the emotional connection to their faith that they do.

God is love. Okay, what is love? What does love feel like? It's certainly got to encompass more than what is written in I Corinthians 13:4-7. What does love do to a person? How does it change a person? These are just a few of the questions about love I have that makes me ponder endlessly on the statement "God is love" and why John 3:16 clashes with my own life's experience. For God so loved the world...okay, why? What was lovable about it? What does it mean to love the world? What does it mean to love your neighbor like is directed by Christ in Matthew 22? What does that love entail?

...and then it all comes back on itself in a never-ending circle of questions leading to more questions, which lead to more questions, and without the experiences of emotions that so many others have had and seem to take for granted that they have them and some of us were left out of being able to experience that aspect of humanity, it's impossible to get the answers that satisfy my questions.

 

[Willie-T]

You will know when, and if, you are ready for any or all of this. To do it because you might be feeling some pressure from others is totally wrong.

 

[Willie-T]

When you are like me, and have very little access to emotions or the ability to express them like others or to understand them, either from yourself or especially from others, it's difficult to reason why some people have the emotional connection to their faith that they do.

God is love. Okay, what is love? What does love feel like? It's certainly got to encompass more than what is written in I Corinthians 13:4-7. What does love do to a person? How does it change a person? These are just a few of the questions about love I have that makes me ponder endlessly on the statement "God is love" and why John 3:16 clashes with my own life's experience. For God so loved the world...okay, why? What was lovable about it? What does it mean to love the world? What does it mean to love your neighbor like is directed by Christ in Matthew 22? What does that love entail?

...and then it all comes back on itself in a never-ending circle of questions leading to more questions, which lead to more questions, and without the experiences of emotions that so many others have had and seem to take for granted that they have them and some of us were left out of being able to experience that aspect of humanity, it's impossible to get the answers that satisfy my questions.

Biblical love is not a feel-good thing. It is having compassionate concern for others.

 

[Sirk]

Growth comes from difficult times in your life. I hope I'm done growing for a long time.

 

[Fenner]

So Fenner, when did you feel God's Holy Spirit leading you?

John the Baptist is said to have been moved by the spirit and jump when Jesus approached while they were both in the womb.

However most people can remember when God touched their lives and gave them faith in Jesus redeeming work on the cross....


Don't have to share, just curious if you choose to answer.

About the age of 35 when I had my first child.

 

[Blain]

To answer your question on what love is I first must explain that God is indeed love but not love as the human heart knows of. Have you ever heard of those warm fuzzy feelings and lovey dovey couples? this is not what is love is.

You see jesus died for all the good and the bad yes even the most evil and the most blood stained souls why did he do that? what would compel a person who is clean pure and righteous in every way to go so far for sinners like us? My belief is that even under all that sin and all that even the most evil of person had done he saw something deep inside worth fighting for for dying for and he would do it a thousand times over for just one of us if he had to.

You see true Love is God it's not simply a feeling or a thought it's a way of seeing a way of thinking a way of being, the love that comes from God changes how we see it changes how we think how we act it even changes our very nature, we slowly yet surely begin to see as he does to think as he does to act and to be as he does and is love the mark of true believer and is the supernatural steroid of the believers faith.

You see God doesn't simply want children who are obedient and who have strong blind faith he is after our hearts he seeks a deep and personal relationship with us a connection of the hearts and when such a connection is made a wondrous power is born a flame ignites that can never be put out not by all the powers of this world or of the enemies. in order to know and understand what love is first a love between you and God must be made it will begin small but the more that you seek him out and desire to know him and to have a deeper love with him the more he fills you with his love and thus because he is love you begin to truly understand and see who he is you notice his traits his nature his ways of thinking.

When I first became saved I asked God what it meant to be a Christian and how do I become strong in him and he replied to me these words- seek love above all else and everything else will fall into place. his advice was spot on as I sought to develop a deep and intimate love with him I was in turn filled with his love the more love he poured into me the more I could see through his eyes the more I gained wisdom the more I gained stronger faith the more I experienced him and came to know him and the more I was able to see others through his eyes.

So as father gave me that advice so do I give to you- seek love above all else and everything else will fall into place. if you seek him you will find him if you knock the door will be opened if you ask you shall receive

 

[Yahweh_is_gracious]

Yes, but what is love?

Explain love without using the word as the definition. Explain love in terms someone who's never experienced it as you've experienced it could understand.

..."surely you've loved before?" Nope. I've said the words, but only to follow suit or trend. It's been a lie every time I said it because I don't know what it is.

 

[Colt45Bullet]

Love is most often described as a feeling. An emotion. Something that activates a hidden sense, but love is also, and more importantly, an action. Giving yourself, your time, money, effort, etc. even when that someone or something do not exactly deserve it. Love can be in the form of affection, but true love, that is shown in your actions.

 

[Fenner]

So Fenner, when did you feel God's Holy Spirit leading you?

John the Baptist is said to have been moved by the spirit and jump when Jesus approached while they were both in the womb.

However most people can remember when God touched their lives and gave them faith in Jesus redeeming work on the cross....


Don't have to share, just curious if you choose to answer.

Okay I'm curious why you asked just me.

 

[Yahweh_is_gracious]

Yes, but what is love?

Explain love without using the word as the definition. Explain love in terms someone who's never experienced it as you've experienced it could understand.

..."surely you've loved before?" Nope. I've said the words, but only to follow suit or trend. It's been a lie every time I said it because I don't know what it is.

I quote myself to imbed an earworm. Muwahahahaha!

[video=youtube;HEXWRTEbj1I]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEXWRTEbj1I[/video]

 

[Blain]

Yes, but what is love?

Explain love without using the word as the definition. Explain love in terms someone who's never experienced it as you've experienced it could understand.

..."surely you've loved before?" Nope. I've said the words, but only to follow suit or trend. It's been a lie every time I said it because I don't know what it is.

The only love I have experienced was with God I grew up without love I never was cared about nor truly loved and maybe it's for that reason that God showed me the love he has.
love is knowing you are cared about love is being able to go to God or to someone close to you without any fear of what they might think love is caring love is patience love is forgiving love tells you that you matter that you are more than good enough love doesn't hold up a mirror or care about if your good looking or not love gives encouragement not judgement love uplifts the wounded heart love reaches a hand to you when you are all alone and sad when you you think no one cares about you or understands you love doesn't say you have to be better or that you are not clean loves accepts you just as you loves just for who you are not for what your not love is willing to use their last dying breath for your sake love is always there when no one else is love is always willing to listen to you and drops everything their doing just give you their ear.

All of this I longed for in my life my parents never gave any of this to me and it's because I grew up without love that know what love really is and that I treasure it love is something that far to many people have lived without