C
I'm currently age 26, and I've attended Christian Young Adult Ministries since age 22.
My primary objectives years ago were: 1) break out of condemnation I felt and 2) date and get married. I accomplished one of these two goals. I broke out of the condemnation. The most important of the two goals.
In early 2009, I broke away from my ministry for further school education. My goal was to return in early 2010, which I did. Except, a shocker came into play during my time away. Mostly everyone had gotten married and left... or just downright left. Sending our ministry back into the dark ages of its roots. It was really striking to be at Easter service, having tons of friends in 2008, and now in 2010 everyone's gone.
In my time away I took a huge look at life. I broke Christian morals and broke all the rules. I was willing to go down in judgment hard if necessary. Life needed to be looked at from a reverse perspective. In 2009, I went out to clubs, had drinks, hit on overly made up girls, the works. I still balance the lifestyle of the world and church to this day, citing that I have no other choice, when confronted. Playing two sides of the ball. You get disrespected for your worldly life from Christians and Pastors, and disrepected for your Christian life from the world. Each side at odds with the other, demanding you play for their team.
It was over this chaotic balance that I saw through the smoke. Church and Christianity was the Christian's problem. Not the world. The world is always there and always will be there. Clubs and drinking is everywhere. I spoke candidly with a guy at a club I had met through my friend. He shared that he hated coming out to all these clubs. The only reason he was here was because he hated being alone. He said if he had a beautiful woman he wouldn't even care about all this. I could identify. Would I have ever gone to church as much as I did in the past if I was married? All my christian friends who got married skipped town at about 88mph.
Yet, it's hard to find a solid christian ministry... not just for growth or for dating but for a well balanced social life. The larger the young adult ministry the greater the room for more friends with common interests. Still, even if you find one, how well off are you? In a group of 10-20?
You need two primary things in a young adult ministry... 1) friends and 2) potential mates. That's before the whole spiritual realm of things. God and spirituality will be everpresent at church. It's like your Bible or Daystar. They're always there when you need them. You can pray to God anytime. Therefore, finding a place with 1) friend and 2) potential mates is where you need to be. That one hour of social a week, makes a huge difference. It opens you up to friends for Friday and Saturday nights. As Christians we spend enough time in our weeks reading the bible and praying.
I see a guy near 40, maybe over, bald who's all upset with himself at the end of a sermon. He openly complains about being single to one of the ushers who shares book suggestions with him. He acts like a chump and leaves like a chump as he heads back to his car. I smirk. I smirk because I know my data. What are the odds? How many single people are present? How many in my age range? Does the style of the evening provide social opportunities? In this jam packed church? There is a big difference between a sunday service and a group night. The answer is no. So why leave feeling like a failure? Instead attacks the odds like I did one night later, talking to one of the single women on the worship team who's absolutely adorable, setting the tone for future interactions.
In revolutionizing young adult ministries I realize that all of them may be limited by 1) vision and 2) church budgets. However, while examining all of the various clubs in cities. none of these are operating under church funding. Is it time to go outside the box as christians, as opposed to limiting ourselves to local and city churches?
My primary objectives years ago were: 1) break out of condemnation I felt and 2) date and get married. I accomplished one of these two goals. I broke out of the condemnation. The most important of the two goals.
In early 2009, I broke away from my ministry for further school education. My goal was to return in early 2010, which I did. Except, a shocker came into play during my time away. Mostly everyone had gotten married and left... or just downright left. Sending our ministry back into the dark ages of its roots. It was really striking to be at Easter service, having tons of friends in 2008, and now in 2010 everyone's gone.
In my time away I took a huge look at life. I broke Christian morals and broke all the rules. I was willing to go down in judgment hard if necessary. Life needed to be looked at from a reverse perspective. In 2009, I went out to clubs, had drinks, hit on overly made up girls, the works. I still balance the lifestyle of the world and church to this day, citing that I have no other choice, when confronted. Playing two sides of the ball. You get disrespected for your worldly life from Christians and Pastors, and disrepected for your Christian life from the world. Each side at odds with the other, demanding you play for their team.
It was over this chaotic balance that I saw through the smoke. Church and Christianity was the Christian's problem. Not the world. The world is always there and always will be there. Clubs and drinking is everywhere. I spoke candidly with a guy at a club I had met through my friend. He shared that he hated coming out to all these clubs. The only reason he was here was because he hated being alone. He said if he had a beautiful woman he wouldn't even care about all this. I could identify. Would I have ever gone to church as much as I did in the past if I was married? All my christian friends who got married skipped town at about 88mph.
Yet, it's hard to find a solid christian ministry... not just for growth or for dating but for a well balanced social life. The larger the young adult ministry the greater the room for more friends with common interests. Still, even if you find one, how well off are you? In a group of 10-20?
You need two primary things in a young adult ministry... 1) friends and 2) potential mates. That's before the whole spiritual realm of things. God and spirituality will be everpresent at church. It's like your Bible or Daystar. They're always there when you need them. You can pray to God anytime. Therefore, finding a place with 1) friend and 2) potential mates is where you need to be. That one hour of social a week, makes a huge difference. It opens you up to friends for Friday and Saturday nights. As Christians we spend enough time in our weeks reading the bible and praying.
I see a guy near 40, maybe over, bald who's all upset with himself at the end of a sermon. He openly complains about being single to one of the ushers who shares book suggestions with him. He acts like a chump and leaves like a chump as he heads back to his car. I smirk. I smirk because I know my data. What are the odds? How many single people are present? How many in my age range? Does the style of the evening provide social opportunities? In this jam packed church? There is a big difference between a sunday service and a group night. The answer is no. So why leave feeling like a failure? Instead attacks the odds like I did one night later, talking to one of the single women on the worship team who's absolutely adorable, setting the tone for future interactions.
In revolutionizing young adult ministries I realize that all of them may be limited by 1) vision and 2) church budgets. However, while examining all of the various clubs in cities. none of these are operating under church funding. Is it time to go outside the box as christians, as opposed to limiting ourselves to local and city churches?
