Hello dear friend! I am so glad you felt the freedom to express your feelings here. No one likes to carry around these kinds of heavy burdens. Words are like that; they can be powerful weapons against us or they can be our saving grace.
The opinions of others shape our view of ourselves and, unfortunately, many people struggle when desperately trying to define their self worth, especially when we are vulnerable to what others say about us. Are the people who spew these unkind words to you in your close circle of contacts, or are they random comments that people blurt out unknowingly? Considering the source of where this damage is coming from can be helpful when deciding whether we should believe them or not!
I know from my own personal experience, that being a wife, a mother, a caretaker, a servant to my home, a coordinator, a cook, a steward of finances, an organizer, a faithful and loving friend, a sensitive listener, a shoulder to cry on, staying health conscious, juggling the minutes and hours of the day, sacrificially giving, disciplining children, encouraging them, teaching them about life, training them up in the way they shoild go, spending time as a family, giving freely to your spouse, managing household duties, etc. often come without a "thank you" and that can be very deflating at times.
I don't think children are even consciously aware that a "thank you" or "I love you" can do a world of good for our souls, but adults??? A mature and caring adult will automatically be aware of when someone does something nice for them. So to interject negative words instead does nothing for the relationship and it does harm to you.
Are those closest to you aware of how this makes you feel? Do you have the liberty to vocalize these concerns with those who say these words to you?
I would like to suggest you begin to pray and ask God to set up some times when you can freely unload these concerns with the person involved. It is very Biblical to handle an offense that way. The Bible says thare will be offenses, and by approaching the person doing the offending can provide an opportunity for them to say they are sorry - if they are truly sorry. Some people (I have seen) will only say they are sorry to get themselves off the hook, but have no sorrow for what they did. I think you will be able to discern the difference.
For those who choose to ignore the significance of their actions, the Bible leaves us with the next step and that is to pray for those who hurt us. Forgive them anyway. I know how hard that can be so I am not minimzing the intensity of trying to do that. But by doing so, you ultimately free yourself from that person, and that is what you are after; freedom from the curse those words bring upon you.
I sure hope and pray you can take some steps to resolving these issues with people. You seem like such a loving and caring person, and loving people sometimes bruise easily. Your heart is a very tender place and needs to be protected at all times. Let God help you accomplish this. Sending you a blessing.
let me first welcome you 
