Ever felt like nothing is ever good enough?

[Chisa_08]

I'm 27 years old and make $40,000 a year with no degree. The only reason I make this much is because I work 2 jobs and I'm working 10 hour days with one day off. I feel old and that I have no more excitement for life. I feel like I'm living to work. I understand that work is needed to make wealth, but I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with a cat and am very unhappy. I feel like life is going nowhere. I'm pursuing my degree but then I'm thinking about the student loans afterwards and it just depresses me. I take better care of my cat than I do myself. I hardly cook because by the time I get home, I just want to go to bed. I feel like my body is slowing down and I recently started losing weight. I'm already a stick figure. I can't afford to drop a job. Do you ever feel like you're just working to live? How do you make it easier? I know I should balance work and play, but I just can't afford to slow down.

 

[Depleted]

We went from making $60,000 a year, (back in the 90's), to now making half that. So, yeah, I've felt that way. But now neither of us can work. (The money is Social Security.) We downsized.

Fortunately, we bought a house back when we were making that much and the mortgage was $550. That also includes real estate taxes and home insurance, which keep going up, so it's $100 more per month now. Still, aren't you shocked anyone can live in a three bedroom house for that little? (And I remember gulping, because that was a lot of money. lol)

Find a cheaper place to live, take the cat, (of course,) give up the $200 a month smartphone and the $200 a month cable, and the... and eating ordering in dinner. Buy good clothes, so they don't wear out and then don't buy clothes (except for underwear) but once a decade. And once you do all that, your choice -- use that extra job to pay for school in cash, or quit the job.

Look for grants, stipends and scholarships for college course. Your living up to your finances. Live much cheaper, and you can afford to quit one of those jobs or pay cash to go to college. It's doable.

How do you eat when your too tired? Sundays. Cook a lot of meals on Sunday, and freeze the rest for the week. OR, eat French toast. It take a copping 5 minutes to make.

Most of the meals I made when hubby was away for 7 months took half an hour. (Chicken thighs or turkey burgers when in the same pan as the french fried, and the roasted veggie). And I kept making enough for two so I had one ready to flop into the pans when I was too tired to cook. I made it a habit to make fresh one night and frozen next night.

 

[laura_charlotte]

Just like you I work full time to support my life goals and long term dreams. I always wake up a few hours earlier in the morning to spend time with the Lord and no matter what time I get home in the evening I make time for my power walking and exercise. I'm also a vegan so I ensure only the best goes into my mind and body collaboratively.

I know the economy is incredibly different now compared to five, ten and twenty years ago so any comparisons are futile. However as the bible says in Philippians 3:12-14

Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

If you don't take care of yourself and include an excellent work life balance and mix your routine up with some adventure, things can turn monotonous and you can lose your motivation to fulfill God's calling on your life.

I have a huge amount of responsibility in my career and although I'm really proud of the position God put me as part of His will for my life to do what I do every day, I couldn't do it without the correct lifestyle choices. I have to make time for exercise, eating the best real foods, journaling and prayer. If I didn't do all those things in conjunction with my work, I wouldn't have the results I do today in all areas of my life.

 

[Depleted]

Actually, the economy is better than it was five years ago, wonderfully better than ten years ago, and worse than 20 years ago.

 

[Desdichado]

First of all, I have to commend you on your hard work. 40,000k a year on multiple jobs with no degree WHILE in school is an amazing feat. Most people would have folded by now and you have not. You must be made of really tough stuff.

I'll tell you what freed me from a similar dead-end feeling. Acceptance. You're in this situation by necessity and God will make you a better person for it. Growth and improvement are always daunting.

Through acceptance, I realized that a lot of what I was feeling was not being tired and overworked as much as having a lack of support structures.

The modern world tells us one of two things- either you'll be happy when you make it on your own or you'll be happy if you sit down and let somebody else do all the work for you. Unfortunately, our political and civil institutions have developed around those extremes.

We have foreclosed on the need for real community. So us individuals have to find a way to build that old communal feeling for ourselves. This may require going to a smaller church, getting in touch with old family members, bringing a gift to our neighbors, etc i.e. real steps out of our comfort zone to those around us.

Also, finding joy in things at the small level. This year has been something of a famine for people in my field. I had to take a job at about the same level of where I was maybe seven years ago. Ouch.

But I put my nose to the grindstone and focused on service. Working to my boss as I would work unto the Lord. Finding importance and meaning in the small things.

I realize these are all highly particular to me, but I hope they help. That's why I shared them.

Again, kudos to you for being tough as nails, sister.

I'm 27 years old and make $40,000 a year with no degree. The only reason I make this much is because I work 2 jobs and I'm working 10 hour days with one day off. I feel old and that I have no more excitement for life. I feel like I'm living to work. I understand that work is needed to make wealth, but I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with a cat and am very unhappy. I feel like life is going nowhere. I'm pursuing my degree but then I'm thinking about the student loans afterwards and it just depresses me. I take better care of my cat than I do myself. I hardly cook because by the time I get home, I just want to go to bed. I feel like my body is slowing down and I recently started losing weight. I'm already a stick figure. I can't afford to drop a job. Do you ever feel like you're just working to live? How do you make it easier? I know I should balance work and play, but I just can't afford to slow down.

 

[wwjd_kilden]

I am sorry you are going though that.

It sounds to me like you are depressed (which I guess isn't too strange), I think you should talk to someone about this,
they might be able to help you feel better.

 

[IDEAtor]

Amazing testimony, sad reality.
It can be, as it says in Ecclesiastes, "all is meaningless."
But as Laura stated, stay balanced and in the Word.
After all, the end of Ecclesiastes shows what is not meaningless is following God.

I also agree with Desdichado's comment about intentionally finding a small church or other ways to keep healthy and organic relationships going.

In the meantime, keep seeking God.
The people, the stress, even the jobs may come or go.
But the Lord will Stand Forever.

Prayer:
Lord, please help this woman to regain strength, and find the right focus.
If she is lonely, or feeling isolated, then help her by sending the right people onto her path.
And help her to keep listening for the still small voice... above the purring or clawing cat.
Lord, in short, I ask that you provide more than she asks in this thread. And I pray she gives you the glory.
In your time and way, in Jesus' name, amen.

 

[breno785au]

I'm 27 years old and make $40,000 a year with no degree. The only reason I make this much is because I work 2 jobs and I'm working 10 hour days with one day off. I feel old and that I have no more excitement for life. I feel like I'm living to work. I understand that work is needed to make wealth, but I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with a cat and am very unhappy. I feel like life is going nowhere. I'm pursuing my degree but then I'm thinking about the student loans afterwards and it just depresses me. I take better care of my cat than I do myself. I hardly cook because by the time I get home, I just want to go to bed. I feel like my body is slowing down and I recently started losing weight. I'm already a stick figure. I can't afford to drop a job. Do you ever feel like you're just working to live? How do you make it easier? I know I should balance work and play, but I just can't afford to slow down.

Find ways to make passive income seriously research it. I certainly don't want to spend the rest of my life trading time for money and I want to make money work for me, not perpetually working for money.

 

[oldethennew]

Live for God, and not for 'work', it will make quite a difference in your life,
but it does take a lot of Faith and Will, and Tenacity and understanding,
fulfilling Jesus' Will for you, making His Will your Priority in every area of your life...
it takes a lot of intensive 'Faith and study' and then living what you read and learn...

if we truly hear His call, we will proceed from there in order to please Him -
and not ourselves...

we're talking 'mega' life-changes here, walking out in the Faith that He gives us...

 

[Huckleberry]

I feel for you sister!
My advice is to immediately stop borrowing money.
Do whatever you have to do to get educated without anymore debt!
Pell grants, scholarships, work two jobs, whatever you gotta do.......
DON'T BORROW ANYMORE MONEY!!!
Was that emphatic enough?
Debt is an enemy.
You want to be wealthy and have something to show for your hard work?
Read and apply Dave Ramsey's book "The Total Money Makeover".
He gives sound, Biblical advice on finances.

 

[weezer]

Do you ever feel like you're just working to live? How do you make it easier? I know I should balance work and play, but I just can't afford to slow down.

I feel for you sister!
My advice is to immediately stop borrowing money.
Do whatever you have to do to get educated without anymore debt!
Pell grants, scholarships, work two jobs, whatever you gotta do.......
DON'T BORROW ANYMORE MONEY!!!
Was that emphatic enough?
Debt is an enemy.
You want to be wealthy and have something to show for your hard work?
Read and apply Dave Ramsey's book "The Total Money Makeover".
He gives sound, Biblical advice on finances.

I love Dave Ramsey! Remember what the Bible tells us: "...the borrower is slave to the lender" (Proverbs 22:7). Also I'm not sure what degree you're working toward, but I would say if it isn't something that will guarantee you increased pay and job security, cut your losses, save the money, and work towards something else. A useless degree and added debt isn't going to get you anywhere. I would second checking out Dave Ramsey, he has a website and a YouTube channel with a lot of financial advice. I hope this helps in some way. I will pray for you!

God Bless!

 

[ROSSELLA]

I'm 27 years old and make $40,000 a year with no degree. The only reason I make this much is because I work 2 jobs and I'm working 10 hour days with one day off. I feel old and that I have no more excitement for life. I feel like I'm living to work. I understand that work is needed to make wealth, but I live in a 1 bedroom apartment with a cat and am very unhappy. I feel like life is going nowhere. I'm pursuing my degree but then I'm thinking about the student loans afterwards and it just depresses me. I take better care of my cat than I do myself. I hardly cook because by the time I get home, I just want to go to bed. I feel like my body is slowing down and I recently started losing weight. I'm already a stick figure. I can't afford to drop a job. Do you ever feel like you're just working to live? How do you make it easier? I know I should balance work and play, but I just can't afford to slow down.

I know exactly how you feel. Like life is just an endless cycle where the same things happen day after day and even if today is a good day, the bad days will just return sooner or later. And you need rest, but can't because if you rest you'll be putting off something vital, but then those vital things suffer because you're too tired. I don't feel that way now, but have on and off my whole life.

I wish I could say it will one day go away, but in my experience it doesn't. For me, Prozac helps. And Jesus. I often hear people say that once they found Jesus they stopped searching for something else. I fully believe He is everything and will fulfill all my needs, but that doesn't stop me from feeling like I want something else and feelings are harder to change than thoughts (I love U2's song Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For because it captures that feeling perfectly). But I do know that without Jesus I would have killed myself long ago. And the bad days with Prozac are no where near as bad as the bad days without Prozac. If possible, you might want to see a psychologist. Even if you don't need or want medication, having someone to talk to might help. And hold on to Jesus, looking to Him every day, even if you're just barely holding on because the moment you look away is the moment everything will collapse.

 

[Angela53510]

We slogged as a couple with 4 kids for many years. We lived simply, I grew our veggies, worked, hubby was out of town with work a lot, leaving me taking care of the kids, and everything else.

Every month we had a zero bank balance, which gradually turned into a negative! Then, he would get an extra check every six months because he was paid biweekly. Then, we would have a small cushion which would gradually disappear.

I tried to keep my my hopes up, but it certainly felt like there was no hope for the future!

Instead, I was able to increase my work, as the kids got older. We got into the housing market after the recession of 1982-83, and every time we moved, we made some money. Then we built a home in an area that was just opening up, and made a lot of money, enough to buy a very nice home overlooking a lake in a tourist community. Which has also gone up in value.

I had to go on disability when I got too sick to work, but I made a reasonable amount. Then, the kids started growing up and moving out, and there was money left over at the end of the month!

Next year, I will lose a bridging option on my pension, which is a huge amount of money. But I have learned to trust God. If we have to cut back, so be it? Not sure what what we will cut back in, maybe downsizing?

Don't give up hope! Things can change in ways you do not expect. Remember God is in control! Things may turn out better than you could ever imagine or dream. And do get some help for your depression. It sounds like you are getting worn down.

 

[Chisa_08]

hello everyone! update: I dropped my second job and started a daycare center. now i'm able to work in the comfort of my own home. I'm no longer depressed. I started going back to church as well. thanks everyone! you guys gave really good advice. I know that I didnt reply to anyone but just know that I read everything and appreciated it all!

 

[hornetguy]

Prayers answered... blessings on you, sis...

 

[CandieM]

This might be of no use to you, and I'm definitely in no place to be giving any advice, but I can speak of the situation that my stepfather is in. He has sustained injury all throughout his life, and now he's fighting to win a Workers Compensation case because of neck injuries that he sustained while driving a semi for a truck driving company. His idea is to move to a place with cheaper rent and cheaper utilities ─ 300 to 550 for rent and utilities is awesome ─ so that he can make more use of the money from working. This may or may not be doable for you, but if he can do it, maybe you can do it. Only a thought.

Me, I'm the type of person who wants to live cheaply, but in a decent home, so that I can live comfortably. I'd prefer to rent a house. My stepfather is considering moving to Virginia which is scenic and very, very cheap. I'm not sure what your needs are, but if you feel like that state can meet your needs, it might be an option for you. Up to you.

I'm sorry that you feel this way in life and I feel like most of the world is starting to feel this way. It's almost like an epidemic of a lack of fulfillment and happiness ─ could just be my perception. It almost seems like younger and younger people are feeling older than they should. To me, the world doesn't feel real anymore; the world feels totally artificial, as if everything is secretly made out of silicone.