divorce

[penetruz]

I am a Christian. I'm married to someone who doesnt work or try to work or do anything, hardly contributes to the home, and treats my children badly. Also, he is not a praying man, and still into worldy things. also, we never consummated the marriage. He is emeshed with his mom, and can't do anything without her, and makes me and my children feel uncomfortable with his constant talks of beating ppl up and negativity in general. he also spreads lies about us to his family. furthermore, he has been with his mom in another state living there over half of the 8 month marriage. He says my kids are stupid, and f$$$ my kids. Am I to stay married to someone like this? I know God hates divorce, he is a cruel man, even purposely trying to cause a car accident while i was in the car with him.After that, he's been gone for a month,and has hacked into all of my accounts fb, gmail, and amazon

 

[Zi]

What's worse getting a divorce or being disgusted by his behavior over and over? You can't live a Godly life with him as is. Love him, stay. If you realize a mistake, leave.

 

[penetruz]

thank you so much what also has me fearful i discovered he has a past with dv with an ex my sister is encouraging me to stay in and fight for the marriage, but at what expense? I can't believe this is what God wants for me.

 

[Zi]

Then be grateful that's he's been away. Fearful is no way to live

thank you so much what also has me fearful i discovered he has a past with dv with an ex my sister is encouraging me to stay in and fight for the marriage, but at what expense? I can't believe this is what God wants for me.

 

[penetruz]

thanks so much for your help

 

[Zi]

You're welcome

 

[Jenizona]

we never consummated the marriage.

This is a deal breaker for me... doesn't sound like an actual marriage? You guys actually had a wedding? Got a license and signed documents and everything?

 

[penetruz]

the same thing i said....Unfortunately..i know God hates divorce, and my sister feels its wrong to divorce, it's not healthy for myself or my kids. the mom threw a suprise reception no wedding thank god no consummation in 8 months he barely would sleep in the same bed period, stayed up all night in the living room, and blamed me for his impotence saying im sloppy so hes turned off, i was 180 since i first met him. its miserable. and hes been gone for a month because i asked him to leave, but refuses to file for divorce, so i think its best if i do it myself

 

[Jenizona]

No wedding? Then you're not legally married! So no divorce needed, just leave the man, seriously. Did you get a marriage license?

 

[blue_ladybug]

If there was no wedding, that means you're not married. So why did you say you are?

the same thing i said....Unfortunately..i know God hates divorce, and my sister feels its wrong to divorce, it's not healthy for myself or my kids. the mom threw a suprise reception no wedding thank god no consummation in 8 months he barely would sleep in the same bed period, stayed up all night in the living room, and blamed me for his impotence saying im sloppy so hes turned off, i was 180 since i first met him. its miserable. and hes been gone for a month because i asked him to leave, but refuses to file for divorce, so i think its best if i do it myself

 

[blue_ladybug]

NEWS FLASH: You aren't married.

the same thing i said....Unfortunately..i know God hates divorce, and my sister feels its wrong to divorce, it's not healthy for myself or my kids. the mom threw a suprise reception no wedding thank god no consummation in 8 months he barely would sleep in the same bed period, stayed up all night in the living room, and blamed me for his impotence saying im sloppy so hes turned off, i was 180 since i first met him. its miserable. and hes been gone for a month because i asked him to leave, but refuses to file for divorce, so i think its best if i do it myself

 

[penetruz]

yes unfortunately we even went in front of pastor exchanged vows we went through clerk of courts officially with licence too

 

[Jenizona]

Penetruz, you said divorce wasn't healthy for you or your children.

He has abandoned you, being gone for half of the marriage.

He verbally abuses you and your children.


You have mentioned this man tried to kill you. Trying to cause an accident while you are in the car.

This "marriage" is the least healthy thing I can possibly imagine.

Divorce him. Immediately. Go look up a paralegal in your area, and call, and find out how much the fees are. It will probably be several hundred dollars. I wish you the best... please get out while you can. <3

 

[penetruz]

thank you i will they said i have to wait a year which will be feb 14 where i would be able to file a dissolution where ony i would have to go to court, and they'll even pay the fees ppl are guilting me about Gods stance on divorce but i cant believe that God would want me or my kids to be involved in this any longer thanks so much for the wisdom i def know im making the right choice to end it before it's too late

 

[Jenizona]

Wow, who will pay the fees? And yes, sometimes there is a waiting period... get out and get healthy! Take care of your kids! And don't date for a while, I read your other posts and you have a history of being with bad men lol! Don't worry, things can get better! Find a good church with a lot of good people, are you in a church? Surround yourself with GOOD people!

 

[penetruz]

legal aid and yes i do and it has affected me and my children i promised my son in particular never again and we deserve better yes i belong to church i have eliminated every dead thing out of my life i will give no more of my oil to dead and toxic things

 

[Jenizona]

Awesome, girl.... you are on your way. <3

 

[blue_ladybug]

I think you need to avoid men altogether after this latest debacle.. seriously.. :/

 

[penetruz]

my son said the same i agree!

 

[blue_ladybug]

Then get out of this relationship and for goodness sake, swear off men forever..lol

my son said the same i agree!