Is bad to not want children?

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ArtsieSteph

Senior Member
Apr 1, 2014
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Arizona
#61
It seems like I’m a bit more open to kids now...still not sure though. Obviously the pain would be forgotten, but I don’t know if I could handle emotionally being a mom...
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
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#62
I dont know about the pain but if you give birth naturally its painful but over and done with, by C section its not so painful but its actually more painful recovering from having yourself cut open.

I think just cross that bridge when it comes.
Its more important to love the children that you ALREADY have. If you dont have any yourself, then love the children you see around you and do your best to look after them. Many PArents are just so busy working these days they need a lot of help.

As for being millenial its a lot harder to raise a family then it was for the baby boomers because of the economics, eg they had free or subsidised housing, free education, full employment, free healthcare, welfare etc. If they wanted to raise a new family they had affordable homes already built for them. Brand new! Nowadays in my country anyway, young people are so in debt that they cannot afford a basic home so even the prospect of a stable home life is completely out of reach for many.

So its totally understandable to not really want children when you cant even look after yourself. I would suggest just living at home with your parents so you have three generations under one roof but it seems a lot of people dont want that or think its too hard. You have free babysitters anyway.
 

cv5

Well-known member
Nov 20, 2018
22,993
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#64
I know it’s like how God populates the world and kids raised by Christian parents are a good thing for possible future believers but...do I HAVE to have kids? Is it ok that I don’t want any?

I have a coworker who was talking about her daughter giving her grand babies and that when someone else hadn’t it was like the kid OWED them grandchildren. Like really?

I know it’s a millennial thing but am I alone here? Am I wrong in my attitude?
The devastating question nobody asks is: do our children want US ????
I mean, are we righteous enough, wealthy enough, healthy enough, strong enough, patient enough? My problem with children is that if I make one single mistake and they are affected negatively, I am at fault and they may be somehow damaged. I cant live with that sword hanging over my head.

Furthermore, life is dangerous and unpredictable. My mother died when I was 12 and life went downhill from there. Father was not a believer. It was a very severe trial. I had to basically go it on my own (education, career, path of life etc).

Moreover, at this point in history, nobody on this board can deny that this present state of society is soaked in the occult and satanic influence. Churches are falling by the wayside and weak. Governments are willfully rejecting the Bible and God as offensive. We are in the final stages of the beginning of end time judgments IMO. Maybe a generation or two at most, but the Man of Sin could be revealed tomorrow for all we know.

Ultimately, there is no command in the NT to have children, it is a personal choice.
However, Paul seems to lean toward singleness IMO.
 

cv5

Well-known member
Nov 20, 2018
22,993
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#65
Having children is tough enough now. But back in the days of Job, things were much much more difficult and devastating. IMO, the ecology and geology of the world will be hurled into instability once again in the near future end time judgements....

 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
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#66
Days of Job...? Seems life was easy for Job until satan stepped in.
I dont think its ever been easy, the only time it was easy to have many children was straight after world war 2 when the population dipped and govts actully wanted people to have lots of children and gave everyone incentives to do so. Thus witness the rise of suburbia which was basically farms for children. 2.5 each apparently.

Prior to that infant mortality was high. Even in recent times I remmeber the prevalence of cot death until people figured out not to leave babies sleeping on their side and to use proper matresses.
 

cv5

Well-known member
Nov 20, 2018
22,993
8,367
113
#67
Days of Job...? Seems life was easy for Job until satan stepped in.
I dont think its ever been easy, the only time it was easy to have many children was straight after world war 2 when the population dipped and govts actully wanted people to have lots of children and gave everyone incentives to do so. Thus witness the rise of suburbia which was basically farms for children. 2.5 each apparently.

Prior to that infant mortality was high. Even in recent times I remmeber the prevalence of cot death until people figured out not to leave babies sleeping on their side and to use proper matresses.
Watch the video. It was the era of the aftermath of cataclismic judgements and continuing catastrophism as the earth was still untable.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,613
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#68
My opinion is that there are already far too many babies/ children on this earth. And in these last days, we certainly don't need anymore of them..

But no, our children are NOT obligated to give us grandchildren. And if more people used protection, there wouldn't be so many babies being born every day..
What a disgraceful, unbiblical thing to say... you need to repent before Him.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,613
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#69
It is my observation that we are all brainwashed into doing most of what we do. Often the girls first play thing is a doll. Then they mimic their mother perpetuating the cycle. When biological urges ensue, they know just what to do. In recent generations that cycle is broken, males and females are in turmoil with lessons taught from parents, then peers, society and faith. They throw all of these factors into a cognitive smoothy and the product is one skrewed up mess that only the Author of Creation can remedy.

First, most people’s natural biology will urge them for reproduction. God has placed fail safes into this for population control. Society has bipassed these safeties with eliminating natural selection.

Second, I love my kids but feel I have done them a disservice by bringing them into this world. Not only have I tied my hands by occupying time I could have dedicated for his service. I gave Satan more targets and potentially assistants. It’s a personal choice that saves us and my concern that they make the right choice is perpetual stress.

If given the choice again, even with all of the joy they brought me, and lessons they taught me, I would abstain. My temporary happiness is not worth the potential of my involvement in creating people that may one day cause others to sin on their path away from salvation.

Sorry this is long, but one more thing. I guess serving God today with children, is like buying more stuff to declutter your house.
This certainly is not God's perspective. The Bible says that children are a blessing and the fruit of the womb is His reward. You need to trust God more than this because He works all things together for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purposes - how do you know whether one day your child will not be a vital vessel for the Lord's use-who may be used far more than you ever could be?!
Also God will be using your child to refine you. And we all need that.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,613
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#70
By no means , their are so many people in this life having children ( because that is what was expected of them.) that had no business having them... or having them.. I totally agree..
What utter, unbiblical rubbish
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,613
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#71
I will not lie I’m terrified of the pain of childbirth or having a c section. It scares me quite a bit.
When I was carrying my 5th baby I was very afraid of the labour I would have to face again.... so I sought the Lord about this.... He led me to read a specific chapter in a book in my house which had come from my Grandma's house when she died, and I had never read. The chapter, amazingly, was about a Christian woman who broke the curse of Eve over herself in the name of Jesus.... and she was laughing whilst she gave birth. So I tried it... I spoke out loud, and I broke the curse of Eve over myself in the name of Jesus... and when my time came I had the most wonderful, beautiful birth of a gorgeous baby boy- it was so wonderful that afterwards I said, "I could do that again!!'😃... that boy is one of the greatest blessings of my life and I thank God for each one of my children. The sixth baby was born when I was less than 13 weeks pregnant ... I held him in my hand and he was beautiful.... I am thankful to have had him for that long and I still cry about him now over 9 years later but I know He is with the Lord, who said that the Kingdom of Heaven is made up of little children....x
 

CherieR

Senior Member
May 6, 2017
2,271
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#73
When I was carrying my 5th baby I was very afraid of the labour I would have to face again.... so I sought the Lord about this.... He led me to read a specific chapter in a book in my house which had come from my Grandma's house when she died, and I had never read. The chapter, amazingly, was about a Christian woman who broke the curse of Eve over herself in the name of Jesus.... and she was laughing whilst she gave birth. So I tried it... I spoke out loud, and I broke the curse of Eve over myself in the name of Jesus... and when my time came I had the most wonderful, beautiful birth of a gorgeous baby boy- it was so wonderful that afterwards I said, "I could do that again!!'😃... that boy is one of the greatest blessings of my life and I thank God for each one of my children. The sixth baby was born when I was less than 13 weeks pregnant ... I held him in my hand and he was beautiful.... I am thankful to have had him for that long and I still cry about him now over 9 years later but I know He is with the Lord, who said that the Kingdom of Heaven is made up of little children....x
God did not curse Eve. He did greatly increase the pain in labour but he did not curse Eve nor Adam.
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,613
1,318
113
#74
@Butterflyyy, what is your opinion on the topic of the op?
Hi
Well...tbh...I think it is bad.
To me it suggests a hard heart-something I would expect from the World not from God's people.
He said they are a blessing, and I reckon if it doesn't seem like they are a blessing then something else is wrong in the circumstances, but it can NEVER be that the child should not exist because someone somewhere will always desperately want to adopt a baby/ child if it can't be kept... many folks long for a child.
It says it is God who opens and closes the womb which is interesting.
But yes... the op.... I just don't think it is God's heart... and who wouldn't want a blessing-the greatest blessings of my life apart from my intimacy with God Himself, are having my children for sure.
What a blessing to have a tiny life growing inside you, to see its tiny fingers when it is born and to hold it close, and to hear cute baby talk, and buy little tiny clothes and shoes, and bathe them... and some of them have cute curls lol and I really miss cuddling and loving my babies and small children... I have had terrible problems with some of my kids but I never regret having them and may God have mercy on people who let such words come out of their lips.
I know of a couple who lost their baby girl recently- she was only 3 months old...
Dear God, thank you for my children...
Amen
 

CherieR

Senior Member
May 6, 2017
2,271
1,429
113
#75
Hi
Well...tbh...I think it is bad.
To me it suggests a hard heart-something I would expect from the World not from God's people.
He said they are a blessing, and I reckon if it doesn't seem like they are a blessing then something else is wrong in the circumstances, but it can NEVER be that the child should not exist because someone somewhere will always desperately want to adopt a baby/ child if it can't be kept... many folks long for a child.
It says it is God who opens and closes the womb which is interesting.
But yes... the op.... I just don't think it is God's heart... and who wouldn't want a blessing-the greatest blessings of my life apart from my intimacy with God Himself, are having my children for sure.
What a blessing to have a tiny life growing inside you, to see its tiny fingers when it is born and to hold it close, and to hear cute baby talk, and buy little tiny clothes and shoes, and bathe them... and some of them have cute curls lol and I really miss cuddling and loving my babies and small children... I have had terrible problems with some of my kids but I never regret having them and may God have mercy on people who let such words come out of their lips.
I know of a couple who lost their baby girl recently- she was only 3 months old...
Dear God, thank you for my children...
Amen
I agree that children are a blessing. I don't see it wrong to not want kids though. That part you mentioned about having them grow inside you is something that I have thought of. It is not something I have ever experienced. I am still not sure about it if I want kids. I feel undecided but still like seeing those cute little babies 😊
 

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
Jan 8, 2018
1,617
1,671
113
#76
I know it’s like how God populates the world and kids raised by Christian parents are a good thing for possible future believers but...do I HAVE to have kids? Is it ok that I don’t want any?

I have a coworker who was talking about her daughter giving her grand babies and that when someone else hadn’t it was like the kid OWED them grandchildren. Like really?

I know it’s a millennial thing but am I alone here? Am I wrong in my attitude?
Kids are a blessing, they bring a lot of joy in your life. Bible says to be fruitful and multiply. God is our Jehovah Jireh, He will provide and knows your needs. We are to make Heaven crowded! I would advise to seek God in prayer about this for His will for you. We can’t tell you if this is wrong or right only you know what you can handle and the direction God has for you. I think because of your concern now, you would be an excellent mother.
 
P

Papou

Guest
#78
I know it’s like how God populates the world and kids raised by Christian parents are a good thing for possible future believers but...do I HAVE to have kids? Is it ok that I don’t want any?

I have a coworker who was talking about her daughter giving her grand babies and that when someone else hadn’t it was like the kid OWED them grandchildren. Like really?

I know it’s a millennial thing but am I alone here? Am I wrong in my attitude?
Having children is a great gift of life ! Happiness guarantee ! They will take care of you once older !
 
M

morefaithrequired

Guest
#80
Is it bad to want loneliness in old age?.
No. But to have kids to avoid it in old age would be the wrong reason .