Sexual sins...

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
M

Mysterymark

Guest
#1
#1
So ive had a large problem with Sexual sins in general and I don't know how to get rid of it. I honestly want all of it to stop consuming my life, but it is like an addiction and I don't know how to break it.

Here's my situation in summary: Basically, I have struggled with sexual sins for a few years now, from different sides. At one point I had to deal with struggling with pornography, and then I stopped with that, but then I struggled with lust, and masterbation, and then I ended up actually doing a lot of sexual things with a few different girls I was dating. I am not dating any of them anymore, but I still struggle with sexual wants, and the mention of it can make me want it a lot. I also struggle with masterbation. I do not know if masterbating is wrong or not, there are many different views on that, but what I do know is that if you are thinking about a girl in a sexual way and she is not your wife, that is lust. So at the very least I have problems with that, and part of that is because of masterbating, because its not easy to enjoy something like that without some thoughts coming along with it.

I want to break free from all of this crap. Its been holding me back from my relationship with God for a long time, and I can't do it anymore. It only has lead to hurt, and not growing spiritually.

Please help me out with this someone. I prayed that God will help me get rid of it, but now I realize that I also need to do my part as well. I have a hard time talking to anyone about this that I know, so I figured that now it is time to find someone I can talk to, even if its just someone totally random. I just have to do something.
 
Thomas60

Thomas60

Banned
#2
Jun 20, 2010
401
1
0
36
#2
If I post first, others will pounce to correct me much sooner. ;)
If you let something you regret fill your mind, it also reinforces how much it stays in your mind. This seems like an unsolvable problem until you ask why it should fill your mind and whether 'sinful' tendencies are something you live with while at least showing some strategies for reducing their frequency, no matter how fail they are, at least you try. But you can't occupy all of your time on one issue, you have to draw the line somewhere, even if it feels like procrastination.
 
M

Mysterymark

Guest
#3
#3
I guess that makes sense. I mean if I dwell on it being a problem, then it will stay in my mind.... But the thing is, the mention of sex on the tv, or from a person as a joke, or whatever makes me crave it, and I want to stop it. I don't want to sin, nor have the desire to sin anymore.

I have made a few decisions based on other posts ive read as far as future relationships go to stop me from doing anything sinful with that person, BUT I just don't know how to end my constant craving for sex, and me giving into it.
 
shemaiah

shemaiah

Senior Member
#4
Jan 28, 2011
2,233
30
48
30
#4
accept and proclaim that you have been freed from the law of sin (Rom. 8: 1-2)
God does not want you to be a slave of sin, rather a conquerer.
In order to overcome sin, you must have the word of God, and the Holy Spirit will remind you of the scriptures you need all times.
As you feed on the word and spend time with God, he shall build you into a conquerer. God bless, i pray he may help you, bro.
 
M

Mysterymark

Guest
#6
#6
Thank you shemaiah and AnandaHya! That was very helpful information :). I read that site you linked me too ananda, and I did what it said, and I already feel like I can do it xD. Now I just need to keep on praying without ceasing, and also spend time in the word every day. Oh, and I need to avoid situations where I can become tempted. But with God I can do it.
 
S

sf11change

Guest
#7
#7
I read in this one book about 'bouncing your thoughts'. So whenever you see something on TV or something that reminds you of it, don't give it enough time to sink in. Have a couple of non-sexual topics in mind that you can bounce your thoughts to when you start feeling tempted..

Long term though, speaking from addiction experience, it doesn't just go away overnight. There's no miracle cure for habitual sin. Something that has become habit is really hard to change because in certain situations your first thought is going to go towards the addiction because that's how it has been for most of your life or however long you've been struggling with this.. Yes God is powerful and can heal you, but we are sinners, we have a sinful nature and it's going to take time because I think it takes more than healing. It takes a total transformation of your thoughts.

If you're really serious about it, there's this amazing site called Setting Captives Free and they have these free courses that help with addictions to sex, food, alcohol, etc. I went through a course on there myself. It's really amazing how it teaches you to totally change your thoughts, motivations, actions, everything.. The Way of Purity course deals with sexual sin and it's 60 days.. so you do a lesson every day.. most times you get an online mentor that reads your responses and helps you through it, prays for you, etc.. If you're interested, here's the link:
Way of Purity - Setting Captives Free

May God walk you through this day by day.
 
TheJesusfreak1990

TheJesusfreak1990

Senior Member
#8
Oct 31, 2009
114
2
18
#8
Its more like boucing ur eyes.. heh cus all dudes r visually wired... Stare away from the boobies and the curves that draws attention.. It will take practice... Make someone accountable.. Also Its a thing thats very natural, Im glad u manned up and u want to break free.. God is already working.. The lust u have its not from God .. Think about it this way.. God can still forgive u if u repent from sexual sins, but U wont be able to so easily.. cause when u will marry someone u will find out ur heart is chipped. U gave bits and pieces of it to some other gal/gals.. that would be sad aye?? Be a man of integrity.. I can give u a lot of tippers but it would become a 500 page book and not a comment.. I think u should read the book called EVERY YOUNG MANS BATTLE that book changed how I used to think..

Bless u bro
 
P

princessbella

Guest
#9
#9
hey you should be proud of yourself for making this step. theres a couple of sites like www.xxxchurch.com and www.settingcaptivesfree.com theres other people on here im sure who are struggling with the same problem.. REcovery is easier if you have someone who you trust and hold you accountable and pray with you i hope you can find that person in real life.. Take it day by day one step at a time. ...

praying for you
 
M

Mysterymark

Guest
#10
#10
Thank you sf11change, and princessbella for the tip about settingcaptivesfree. Ive started doing the lessons, and I already am liking it and think it will help me immensely.

And the bouncing your thoughts tip is a good idea sf11change :). I need to put my mind elsewhere when i hear things that will make me want to sin. And Jesusfreak, bouncing your eyes is definitely true. Girls nowadays definitely don't make it easy for guys not to sin :/. Not saying all girls but todays fashion definitely isn't the most modest thing in the world...

I've heard every young mans battle mentioned a few times now actually, and my grandpa gave it to me once to read but i never got around to it. I think I will definitely read that book now xD!

Thank you guys for all your support and help! I am definitely glad I joined this site, because it is helping me a lot, and I have a feeling I will make some good friends, and have lots of good support that every christian needs :).

And thank you princessbella! I am proud that im finally making this step. I'm sick of being a lukewarm, useless Christian. I want to be a warrior for Christ, and its time I start getting the things that are preventing this from happening in my life, out. Its also time I start spending daily time with God, and talking to people who will help my christian walk instead of people who will harm it (or in my case, not really anyone at all, and being dependent on me myself and I).

Thank you brothers and sisters in Christ :)
 
S

sidramalik100

Guest
#11
#11
well if you want to exit your Sexual activities then you have need to avoid from your heartly wishes like when your heart want to do a sex with a Gal then stopped him by doing and do not do this and always pray to Your Allah that gave you rid from these types of activities . i hope you will get a rid from these sexual sins .
 
S

Sound

Guest
#12
#12
Mysterymark said:
I do not know if masterbating is wrong or not, there are many different views on that, but what I do know is that if you are thinking about a girl in a sexual way and she is not your wife, that is lust.
Click to expand...
1 Corinthians 7:3-5 - "The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control."
I suppose masturbation applies to lust too.

but anyway, just repent and surround yourself by GOD, everyday. Nothing but solid Christianity in your life, and your sexual desires should go away over time. And every time your tempted just ask GOD to perish the thought. And if you mean it, HE will. ;)
 
Protection_Retribution

Protection_Retribution

Banned
#13
Apr 6, 2011
431
2
0
#13
Wow dude... you're a nympho o_O Actual professional help would probably worked best. Im pretty sure it was classified as a mental health problem, unclassified and now it's reclassified again.
 
S

Sound

Guest
#14
#14
Protection_Retribution said:
Wow dude... you're a nympho o_O Actual professional help would probably worked best. Im pretty sure it was classified as a mental health problem, unclassified and now it's reclassified again.
Click to expand...
I've actually had a similiar problem and praying about it worked fine. :[
 
P

Psalm2713

Guest
#15
#15
I have to say this...... random but true.....
I love you guys and I thank God for each one of you...... I am blessed to have met you even though it’s just online...... *tears*
 
P

purplemonkiesflymyprettys

Guest
#16
#16
i don't know how i can help you much. I struggle with sexual sins myself. i was addicted to porn that has lessened greatly when my parents found out and now monitor the computer very carefully. i am still however struggeling with masturbation and the thoughts that come with that and the thoughts by themselves. I am getting better though, i have many friends who struggle with the same problem who talk with me and are a great support group. but i've also read this book called "Pure Heart a Woman's guide to sexual integrity". It has helped me a lot. They have one for guys too called "Pure Eyes a Man's guide to sexual integrity". having sexual sins can cause guilt that will eat away at ur mind constantly. All i can offer is to say talk about it with people u trust. and research how to get better and never stop trying. I will pray for you.
 
A

AV_Techy_Dude

Guest
#17
#17
Okay, lets keep this real!! We are all Human, Sexual, beings. We all have natural sexual desires that we were born with. The problem is that we as Humans
have distorted what Sex is! We have made it all about pure pleasure! The act of sex itself obviously brings pleasure, however, when the sole purpose
becomes pleasure, everything gets distorted and problems begin. God intended that the act of sex between a husband and wife be an extremely intimate
and pleasure filled experience. When kept within the confines of such, it can be the most beautiful experience on the planet!! However, Man, because of
his natural sinful nature, has warped this to make us all think that it is simply about self pleasure. And in such, you achieve this in whatever means is possible!!
Pornography pollutes your mind into believing that there is nothing wrong with seeking self pleasure by any means! What it fails to show, is that Sex without
Intimacy, Emotionally and Physically is not satisfying at all! That is why once you start, you want more etc.. And you find yourself in situations that you
never thought possible and doing things that you never imagined yourself or anyone else doing. When you are caught in this trap, it is not easy to get out of!! Trust me, I have been there!!
The only way to experience true Freedom from this addiction is to totally and completely "Renew" your mind DAILY!! Saturate yourself in the Word!!
When you feel sexual and desires start to occur, this is the time that you need to STOP, right away, and ask the Lord to Renew Your Mind and Cleanse you
from impurity. Don't let anyone kid you...These thoughts and desires that bombard you on a daily basis will NOT go away! Your reaction and subsequent
actions to them, can and will change as you continually seek the Lord's help through the Holy Spirit. Oh Yeah, throwing away those Porn Magazines and Videos is a good place to start! LOL
 
L

lost1

Guest
#18
#18
I know what you are talking about and it's very hard. One of the things that makes it so hard is that sexual desire is celebrated everywhere you go. On television, in movies and magazines and billboards. It's hard not to think about these things when they are everywhere. Music has this mysterious way of bringing out emotions, making us feel a certain way or desires and thoughts in us kind of like a spell. This is a deception of evil to think that its okay. One thing that I know is in the eyes of the lord thinking about sinning is no different than doing it in his eyes. What helps me is to think about how he is always with us and how we hurt him when we sin. When I feel a desire to sin I repeat to myself "The Lord is my shepheard I shall not want". It works for me and I hope it helps you and I pray that god gives you the strength to control the flesh instead of it controlling you. God bless you my friend.
 
P

Peter321

Guest
#19
#19
Protection_Retribution said:
Wow dude... you're a nympho o_O Actual professional help would probably worked best. Im pretty sure it was classified as a mental health problem, unclassified and now it's reclassified again.
Click to expand...
God is way better than any professional can be :)
 
Pinemeadowsgeorge

Pinemeadowsgeorge

Banned
#20
Jan 20, 2011
104
0
0
32
#20
all addicitions are addressed by the 12step AA program. review the steps of AA and apply them to the situation you find yourself in. that is the best advice i have and utilize myself for my addictions.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.