Trust me I know where your coming from. In my entire family stuff only seems to happen to me, the cancer the damage on my brain and body the severe abuse and breain I g0ot from them as well my eyes almost going blind I can never live like everyone else I am mentally incapable and find it hard to do simple things on my own I can never drive and working is hard for me for obvious reasons and I get 30 dollars a week after my disabilty check takes care of my food and rent and medical things it is sometimes so unbearable that I sometimes break down in tears because of how unfair it is.
But like I always say for every way I was made weak in this world he made me strong in his, your brother has had it easy and so he is unaware of the value that suffering brings. If I had not gone through all I have it wouldn't have made me who I am today and so I always thank God for my suffering in life and use these experiences to help others who have also known suffering and pain in life.
It doesn't matter what cards you have been dealt in life what matters is what you do with them. If you have been dealt a bad hand in life then fight for a better one
It's very encouraging to hear your testimony of Gods grace in the midst of your tribulation.
The fact that you're not bitter towards God for giving you such a heavy cross to bare, demonstrates that you have true faith in Him.
I've noticed that those who bare heavy crosses seem to be the most faithful people. The world may look at you with pity, but they don't realize that their plight is far more serious than yours. God could heal you instantly if that was His will, but we just have to trust in Him even when He sends us harsh providences.
I had a serious motorcycle accident a few years ago, which involved several surgeries and left me with an opioid addiction. After around 12 months of using 200mg's Oxy Contin per day, the Doctor stopped prescribing it and I started substituting it with heroin. Then I quickly ran out of money and after selling everything I owned, I suffered the worst imaginable cold turkey withdraw for 3 months. It was during that time, that I turned to Christ as my last hope and He gave me the strength to see it through.
After 16 months, I feel much better but I still can't laugh or cry and I can't enjoy life as I did before but I wouldn't change a thing because I know that God used that accident to bring me to repentance. God showed me that I can have true joy in Him, even if I feel sad and depressed.
I attended a few Narcotics Anonymous meetings, where they use the 12 step program to maintain their abstinence. But that program depressed me even more, because the poor people there still identify as addicts even after years of abstinence. I didn't hear anyone mention Christ, they talked about a higher power which could be anything you invent in your own mind.
I wish that I had some words of wisdom to encourage you, but I'm not a good communicator. All I can do is point you to the One who is all wise, all sufficient and all loving. He's our only true friend, He proved it by going to the cross for us.