Hey guys! I just wanted to open this thread up because I feel like it is so important to talk about. When I talk to people my age about Jesus Christ, they are so hurt and scarred by the abuse they have suffered from other Christians that came about because of how Christians presented the gospel to them. I love God, Jesus and People. I want to reach out to them with the love and compassion that Jesus wants me to. But how do i reach past all that pain and hurt? How do we undone the injustice that has happened in our own churches?
You guys mind sharing your hearts on this?
Funny thing is the best people to ask this question to are Not Christians.
Without even trying I've hard the complaints given against Christians. And deeper than the parroted responses of "i hate organized religion" or "church is full of hypocrites", which is often just being repeated from someone else who said it.
As a former Christian myself, and hearing others experiences of others there are a few things that seem to be quite clear.
First step I'd suggest when speaking to one who has experienced, first hand, damaging behavior from Christians... don't try to change their minds about Christians. Change their mind about God.
Do this by not wasting your focus on their past experience but rather creating new, positive experiences.
As a Christian teen I remember talking to a secular band. They had pentagrams and the usual on their covers and merchandise. We walked over and started talking to them, and they admitted it was all for show and only one member actually believed anything even close to what they put out.
We then found out that Christians had been coming up to them, looking at their stuff and making faces and walking off. In a room full of Christians they were treated with disdain by all but us and one other.
They began opening up and one memeber shared how they tried going to church to learn about God and were kicked out and told not to return, just for the way they were dressed. This experience was a huge part of them turning away from God.
And while it's clear they all had problems with Christians for various reasons, they seemed to appreciate us just coming over, listening and asking questions. I'm sure there were no magical changes that night, but we liked to think we at least planted a seed that showed them something different.
In fact we related to them with some of our own experiences.
Arrogance is another problem I've heard mentioned by non-Christians and I 100% get what they mean. Most Christians seem to talk At people when trying to witness. Speaking down to them and telling them what they need to do. And when they can't convince someone using these tactics, they'll make condescending comments and walk off.
Also it's not so common that Christians attempt to connect with and relate to people. Rather than using their own experiences to interact with people on a personal level, they wrap a bat with bible pages and attempt to beat them with a barrage of scripture. A total personal and emotional disconnect.
Christians often don't listen. They're so convinced they're right and have all the answers they simply expect people to, basically, obey them.
Christians often don't think about what they're saying. Many seem to have a list of predetermined answers they got off bumper stickers, and when something arises they find the one that most closely fits, and if none fit they will often pick one anyways, and try to make it fit.
Followed after by the default "just pray and read your Bible". Totally thoughtless, insincere and disconnected. Rather than handling each situation as it comes and formulating personal, thought out respones, instead bumper sticker theology.
Telling people to quit sinning does nothing for people. Don't focus on their individual sins, because that's a dead end. Guide people to God and let Him determine the path to take for that individual in dealing with their sins. The goal isn't to call them out for each sin they do, but to admit they are a sinner.
So, in short, be humble, yet confident. Connect with people and make conversations personal (notice this is not a tactic, but should be done in a genuine manner). And don't expect every conversation to lead to salvation. Planting and watering are the majority of witnessing.
1
