I wrote this last night for Dorothy.
Self examining has its purpose at all stages of walk, but at a certain point, you are grown and mature enough to know very well that neither you nor God aren't going anywhere, and from then on the reasons you examine yourself change.
There are two purposes of warnings. One is for are those who aren't yet certain who they are in Jesus, or their faith hasn't grown strong yet. They examine themselves until they have firm faith in their heart that they are justified in Jesus and that His Spirit lives in them. This took me first several years as a believer, to really get rooted.
Then after we know this, we are examining ourselves because we love Him, it is unthinkable for a born again person to abuse God's grace. Self examining comes from the place of agape love. Not from place of fear. Apostle John wrote that "perfect love casts out fear" and "whoever fears" is "not being made perfect in love". So that was one of the biggest influences for me to decide to trust Jesus when it comes to salvation security. He doesn't want me to be distracted with constant checking if I am still saved because that is me focusing on MYSELF, but our God is a jealous God and wants my undivided attention.
(And I guarantee you, He especially does NOT want people who are prone to anxiety to constantly wonder in their mind if they are still okay with Him, or maybe they have messed up God does not like or want such.
Just believe me on that one...)
I used to think that I would please God better that way (minding salvation loss) and I was very afraid to let go of that control. This didn't help me be more godly. The disturbance that I still stumbled at times was constantly gnawing at me, I was distressed and agonizing about it daily. From a young believer bursting in praise, when I gave my life to Jesus, I gradually became very depressed. I had no hope to continue another day. I would only get some relief reading Psalms, just enough to fall asleep. It was like a balm to hear them. But I still doubted so much about my safety with God. It was so odd, that this David could find refuge in God and that God would endure forever in mercy for him, but somehow it did not apply to me, I could lose salvation. Why did I struggle so much receiving this? What was this iron grip, this fear that held me back and pulled me down? An elder sister in Christ started reading Psalms to me one day, to make me understand, simply saying my name wherever God said "you" in Psalms. I broke down weeping.
The more I read, the more I was realizing the safety was in God's very character. God can be trusted and depended upon and taken refuge in because He cannot lie or take His word back. David leaned in absolute faith on God's promises and magnified God, there was distress when he stumbled and sinned, but he never thought thoughts such as, God might let me go, or I might be unsaved, or God is our refuge but we can't be 100% sure we have refuge until we are dead, there's none of that...
David asks God to examine him for one reason: because he looks forward to being with God and wants to please God and be ready in clean robes. Not because he is afraid that him or God will leave. Same thing as in John.
"Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ," this is the Scripture that pulled me out of the hellhole, in combination with Psalms. I did not defeat doubt by myself, it was the Word of God taking effect in my life and destroying the enemy. Jesus was always the one who delivered me.
That's my testimony on salvation loss theology and how unprofitable and fruitless it was in my life...
Self examining has its purpose at all stages of walk, but at a certain point, you are grown and mature enough to know very well that neither you nor God aren't going anywhere, and from then on the reasons you examine yourself change.
There are two purposes of warnings. One is for are those who aren't yet certain who they are in Jesus, or their faith hasn't grown strong yet. They examine themselves until they have firm faith in their heart that they are justified in Jesus and that His Spirit lives in them. This took me first several years as a believer, to really get rooted.
Then after we know this, we are examining ourselves because we love Him, it is unthinkable for a born again person to abuse God's grace. Self examining comes from the place of agape love. Not from place of fear. Apostle John wrote that "perfect love casts out fear" and "whoever fears" is "not being made perfect in love". So that was one of the biggest influences for me to decide to trust Jesus when it comes to salvation security. He doesn't want me to be distracted with constant checking if I am still saved because that is me focusing on MYSELF, but our God is a jealous God and wants my undivided attention.
(And I guarantee you, He especially does NOT want people who are prone to anxiety to constantly wonder in their mind if they are still okay with Him, or maybe they have messed up
God does not like or want such.Just believe me on that one...)
I used to think that I would please God better that way (minding salvation loss) and I was very afraid to let go of that control. This didn't help me be more godly. The disturbance that I still stumbled at times was constantly gnawing at me, I was distressed and agonizing about it daily. From a young believer bursting in praise, when I gave my life to Jesus, I gradually became very depressed. I had no hope to continue another day. I would only get some relief reading Psalms, just enough to fall asleep. It was like a balm to hear them. But I still doubted so much about my safety with God. It was so odd, that this David could find refuge in God and that God would endure forever in mercy for him, but somehow it did not apply to me, I could lose salvation. Why did I struggle so much receiving this? What was this iron grip, this fear that held me back and pulled me down? An elder sister in Christ started reading Psalms to me one day, to make me understand, simply saying my name wherever God said "you" in Psalms. I broke down weeping.
The more I read, the more I was realizing the safety was in God's very character. God can be trusted and depended upon and taken refuge in because He cannot lie or take His word back. David leaned in absolute faith on God's promises and magnified God, there was distress when he stumbled and sinned, but he never thought thoughts such as, God might let me go, or I might be unsaved, or God is our refuge but we can't be 100% sure we have refuge until we are dead, there's none of that...
David asks God to examine him for one reason: because he looks forward to being with God and wants to please God and be ready in clean robes. Not because he is afraid that him or God will leave. Same thing as in John.
"Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ," this is the Scripture that pulled me out of the hellhole, in combination with Psalms. I did not defeat doubt by myself, it was the Word of God taking effect in my life and destroying the enemy. Jesus was always the one who delivered me.
That's my testimony on salvation loss theology and how unprofitable and fruitless it was in my life...
I was moved by your testimony and proud to call you brother, one belonging to the same family.
When another bares his soul in a personal account, it isn’t right to point out matters where I see it differently. Instead I’ll give my journey.
I was saved as a child when God shower me my sin and I wept in repentance and was cleansed. The Gospel was explained years later and I matched my experience to it and had then words to describe my experience.
I grew in my faith as a teen having excellent teaching at our church. Our youth nights did not consist of pizza and games but challenging messages.
Anyway, I do recall being afraid Id. lose my faith in college so I made sure I joined a Christian fellowship and continued in having quiet times of prayer and obeying what I felt God asked me to do. I had enough on my plate with trying to ascertain what my major ought to be from Him and other matters of what He wanted me to do in the details of my choices.
I discovered CS Lewis’s Mere Christianity and that was a tremendous help in the reasonableness of my faith. That’s the last time I recall being concerned about my salvation. (I had never heard of OSAS at that point. One never gets this from the scripture but needs a man to tell you. I hadn’t met any yet.)
Since then I continue to pursue knowing God and making Him know .
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