Help Me!

[not_abandoned_2020]

I am losing my mind.

Every medication I have tried for my mental illness has failed. They do not work together with my other meds, so my doctor has run out of options for me. She calls it "treatment-resistant". I'm not getting better.

I've been told by other people, including my mom, to get over it. It's been years now, and she is becoming tired of me. No one supports me anymore, so I'm suffering alone. My parents help cover expenses, but I don't know how long that will last as I'm 23 now.

Two weeks ago at church during a sermon, I had a panic attack and fell to the ground crying. I was then literally dragged out of service by three people. Then I found out later my pastor announced to the whole church that I was manifesting demons.

From my internet research, I believed they performed an exorcism on me. I can't remember all that happened because I fainted as they were dragging me. However, when I woke up there were 9 people surrounding me, holding me down and speaking strange languages. They forced me to stay until I confessed: "Jesus Christ is Lord".

Sometimes I have flashbacks of being assaulted as a child. My doctor tells me that it is related to PTSD from my adolescent years when I was abused. And recently I have been having scary dreams that cause me to wake up screaming and jumping out of bed. My dreams always end up with someone attacking/assaulting me. This hasn't happened before.

I don't know what is real anymore.

I'm afraid that my problem is demonic, that may be why meds are not working.

I'm really scared. I don't want to live like this. What did I do to allow demons inside of me?

 

[not_abandoned_2020]

Please pray for me to have a sound mind and not give in to suicidal thoughts.

 

[Encouragement]

I am losing my mind.

Every medication I have tried for my mental illness has failed. They do not work together with my other meds, so my doctor has run out of options for me. She calls it "treatment-resistant". I'm not getting better.

I've been told by other people, including my mom, to get over it. It's been years now, and she is becoming tired of me. No one supports me anymore, so I'm suffering alone. My parents help cover expenses, but I don't know how long that will last as I'm 23 now.

Two weeks ago at church during a sermon, I had a panic attack and fell to the ground crying. I was then literally dragged out of service by three people. Then I found out later my pastor announced to the whole church that I was manifesting demons.

From my internet research, I believed they performed an exorcism on me. I can't remember all that happened because I fainted as they were dragging me. However, when I woke up there were 9 people surrounding me, holding me down and speaking strange languages. They forced me to stay until I confessed: "Jesus Christ is Lord".

Sometimes I have flashbacks of being assaulted as a child. My doctor tells me that it is related to PTSD from my adolescent years when I was abused. And recently I have been having scary dreams that cause me to wake up screaming and jumping out of bed. My dreams always end up with someone attacking/assaulting me. This hasn't happened before.

I don't know what is real anymore.

I'm afraid that my problem is demonic, that may be why meds are not working.

I'm really scared. I don't want to live like this. What did I do to allow demons inside of me?

Hello that you for posting this on here.I will respond a bit more properly...I understand what you are going through and it would see that strongholds have been established in your life when you were younger that haven't been broken.Yet there IS A WAY OUT 1000%.
No weapon forged again you shall prosper.
will message you again here shortly a proper message..

 

[Encouragement]

Please pray for me to have a sound mind and not give in to suicidal thoughts.

Yea if course I will pray for you

 

[Al-Tekoa]

I am losing my mind.

Every medication I have tried for my mental illness has failed. They do not work together with my other meds, so my doctor has run out of options for me. She calls it "treatment-resistant". I'm not getting better.

I've been told by other people, including my mom, to get over it. It's been years now, and she is becoming tired of me. No one supports me anymore, so I'm suffering alone. My parents help cover expenses, but I don't know how long that will last as I'm 23 now.

Two weeks ago at church during a sermon, I had a panic attack and fell to the ground crying. I was then literally dragged out of service by three people. Then I found out later my pastor announced to the whole church that I was manifesting demons.

From my internet research, I believed they performed an exorcism on me. I can't remember all that happened because I fainted as they were dragging me. However, when I woke up there were 9 people surrounding me, holding me down and speaking strange languages. They forced me to stay until I confessed: "Jesus Christ is Lord".

Sometimes I have flashbacks of being assaulted as a child. My doctor tells me that it is related to PTSD from my adolescent years when I was abused. And recently I have been having scary dreams that cause me to wake up screaming and jumping out of bed. My dreams always end up with someone attacking/assaulting me. This hasn't happened before.

I don't know what is real anymore.

I'm afraid that my problem is demonic, that may be why meds are not working.

I'm really scared. I don't want to live like this. What did I do to allow demons inside of me?

.
Sorry for your turmoil.

3. Deuteronomy 31:6 -
"Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you."

Will pray for you too!
.

 

[Budman]

I am losing my mind.

Every medication I have tried for my mental illness has failed. They do not work together with my other meds, so my doctor has run out of options for me. She calls it "treatment-resistant". I'm not getting better.

I've been told by other people, including my mom, to get over it. It's been years now, and she is becoming tired of me. No one supports me anymore, so I'm suffering alone. My parents help cover expenses, but I don't know how long that will last as I'm 23 now.

Two weeks ago at church during a sermon, I had a panic attack and fell to the ground crying. I was then literally dragged out of service by three people. Then I found out later my pastor announced to the whole church that I was manifesting demons.

From my internet research, I believed they performed an exorcism on me. I can't remember all that happened because I fainted as they were dragging me. However, when I woke up there were 9 people surrounding me, holding me down and speaking strange languages. They forced me to stay until I confessed: "Jesus Christ is Lord".

Sometimes I have flashbacks of being assaulted as a child. My doctor tells me that it is related to PTSD from my adolescent years when I was abused. And recently I have been having scary dreams that cause me to wake up screaming and jumping out of bed. My dreams always end up with someone attacking/assaulting me. This hasn't happened before.

I don't know what is real anymore.

I'm afraid that my problem is demonic, that may be why meds are not working.

I'm really scared. I don't want to live like this. What did I do to allow demons inside of me?

If you have called out to Jesus to forgive your sins and save you, you do not have to fear demonic possession. You are indwelt with the Holy Spirit, and He will not share you with a demon. You are a child of God and He will not abandon you. The Bible says He will never leave you or forsake you, and nothing in all creation can snatch you out of His hands. You are completely safe.

The bible promises believers a sound mind. (2 Timothy 1:7 KJV). You will not go crazy. I would suggest you get into the Word and perhaps put some praise music on in the background. It will soothe your emotions.

And always remember, a panic attack can't hurt you - only scare you. And it won't even do that when you realize it's just adrenalin in your system. The same adrenaline that gets dumped in when you're exited, play sports, have sex, get angry, watch s spooky movie, etc.

I had a friend who had really bad panic attacks, and his doctor told him he didn't need medicine, and that all he needed to do was when he felt one coming on was to just go look in the bathroom mirror and laugh at himself. And remind himself that he was the one causing it, and he could also stop it. After about a week, he stopped having them altogether.

Praying for you, dear one.

 

[Budman]

Also, when you feel any kind of oppression - simply call out to the Lord Jesus to help you. He is willing and certainly able, and no oppressive spirit can stand against His holy name. They will flee from His name. Remember, Jesus is God and is always with you. No matter where you are or where you go, He will never leave your side. But we must be willing to give our burdens over to Him.

Give this all over to Him, and do not worry. Trust Him. He will not fail you.

 

[Papou]

I am losing my mind.

Every medication I have tried for my mental illness has failed. They do not work together with my other meds, so my doctor has run out of options for me. She calls it "treatment-resistant". I'm not getting better.

I've been told by other people, including my mom, to get over it. It's been years now, and she is becoming tired of me. No one supports me anymore, so I'm suffering alone. My parents help cover expenses, but I don't know how long that will last as I'm 23 now.

Two weeks ago at church during a sermon, I had a panic attack and fell to the ground crying. I was then literally dragged out of service by three people. Then I found out later my pastor announced to the whole church that I was manifesting demons.

From my internet research, I believed they performed an exorcism on me. I can't remember all that happened because I fainted as they were dragging me. However, when I woke up there were 9 people surrounding me, holding me down and speaking strange languages. They forced me to stay until I confessed: "Jesus Christ is Lord".

Sometimes I have flashbacks of being assaulted as a child. My doctor tells me that it is related to PTSD from my adolescent years when I was abused. And recently I have been having scary dreams that cause me to wake up screaming and jumping out of bed. My dreams always end up with someone attacking/assaulting me. This hasn't happened before.

I don't know what is real anymore.

I'm afraid that my problem is demonic, that may be why meds are not working.

I'm really scared. I don't want to live like this. What did I do to allow demons inside of me?

Demons do not exist ... Don"t go to church for the time being ...
This is not a demonic problem but a mental disorder due to past abuses !
This happens too often and have lifelong impact. May God put love on all your roads, someone who will cherish you ...

 

[Roughsoul1991]

I am losing my mind.

Every medication I have tried for my mental illness has failed. They do not work together with my other meds, so my doctor has run out of options for me. She calls it "treatment-resistant". I'm not getting better.

I've been told by other people, including my mom, to get over it. It's been years now, and she is becoming tired of me. No one supports me anymore, so I'm suffering alone. My parents help cover expenses, but I don't know how long that will last as I'm 23 now.

Two weeks ago at church during a sermon, I had a panic attack and fell to the ground crying. I was then literally dragged out of service by three people. Then I found out later my pastor announced to the whole church that I was manifesting demons.

From my internet research, I believed they performed an exorcism on me. I can't remember all that happened because I fainted as they were dragging me. However, when I woke up there were 9 people surrounding me, holding me down and speaking strange languages. They forced me to stay until I confessed: "Jesus Christ is Lord".

Sometimes I have flashbacks of being assaulted as a child. My doctor tells me that it is related to PTSD from my adolescent years when I was abused. And recently I have been having scary dreams that cause me to wake up screaming and jumping out of bed. My dreams always end up with someone attacking/assaulting me. This hasn't happened before.

I don't know what is real anymore.

I'm afraid that my problem is demonic, that may be why meds are not working.

I'm really scared. I don't want to live like this. What did I do to allow demons inside of me?

I'd have to agree with Budman. If you are a child of God then Demons cannot indwell in the same place as the Holy Spirit. They can only attack from the outside like probing your mind with lies or situations they use to temp or scare you. Your mind is influenced by your brain and your brain could have internal damage from past traumatic situations.

For example,

"People that experience trauma not only suffer from mental health issues such as depression and anxiety, they may even have significant changes in their brain. Victims of trauma, particularly those who develop PTSD may have their brain “rewired” in a sense due to their exposure to trauma. Childhood trauma can even impact the developing brain and cause variations in the volume and function of the brain.

When a person experiences trauma, a certain part of their brain takes over that triggers the “fight or flight” response meant to protect us from danger. In this mode, nonessential body and mind functions shut down until the threat ceases and the nervous system allows those higher functions to resume. With severe trauma however, after effects of this process remain which can lead to nightmares, flashbacks, and difficulty with change or self-expression."

https://vantagepointrecovery.com/psychological-trauma-affects-brain/

So it very well could take a specialist in PTSD issues. Also I would find a different church and find a spiritual therapist as well. One to help you heal in your soul and the other to possibly help you heal mentally.

I have experienced my own share of panic and blackbouts. To the point it almost stopped me from even leaving my house. But I received help and spiritual revelation that helped me cope with it. Not as severe as yours and probably less trauma behind it but if I had let it go without help, I honestly do not know how I could of functioned like that. I thought the same thing as I was losing my mind. I wanted it to do one thing but it was doing the opposite.

 

[Magenta]

Matthew 11:28-30

 

[Encouragement]

Demons do not exist ... Don"t go to church for the time being ...
This is not a demonic problem but a mental disorder due to past abuses !
This happens too often and have lifelong impact. May God put love on all your roads, someone who will cherish you ...

what do you mean demons don't exist of course they do..have you not read the accounts in the new testament of people being tormented/affected by evil spirits..??
crazy!

 

[Papou]

what do you mean demons don't exist of course they do..have you not read the accounts in the new testament of people being tormented/affected by evil spirits..??
crazy!

I disagree with you the OP is not a demon ! I read the bible so many times, having to memorize it, painful ... If you want to understand the NT you have to understand the culture in which it was written. In those time, you sneezed, this was a demon, a storm, another demon, you were deaf, a demon, blind, another demon, and so on. Our generation is much more clever and knowledgeable. What I am trying to say is that the bible cannot be taken literally, word by word. Think about it and uses your critical mind to see the truth ...

 

[Encouragement]

I disagree with you the OP is not a demon ! I read the bible so many times, having to memorize it, painful ... If you want to understand the NT you have to understand the culture in which it was written. In those time, you sneezed, this was a demon, a storm, another demon, you were deaf, a demon, blind, another demon, and so on. Our generation is much more clever and knowledgeable. What I am trying to say is that the bible cannot be taken literally, word by word. Think about it and uses your critical mind to see the truth ...

In regards to the OP not being caused by a demon is really something that only God himself knows not us..I have personally experienced many struggles at an emotional and psychological level that has been spiritual in origin which I have been set free from..and the accounts I had new testament of people being set free from evil spirits are not written in a metaphorical sense..they are written as an actual account.
I can personally testify to understanding this spiritual dynamic to human life as a Christian and of course not everything is spiritual.
In fact our generation is at times more ignorant to how the kingdom of darkness operates..things like Harry Potter...and many other things are expressions if this kingdom..
I have been through dark times of suicidal thoughts mental torments..levels of mental illness and know the various methodologies available..Nothing worked for me..
my struggles were not flesh and blood and it took a while to grasp this...God set me free from the spiritual forces that were the root cause..it was a real experience..not some mind trick ect..
Demons do exist and the bible gives us a very clear insight into this invisible realm which we have the victory through jesus to overcome.

 

[stepbystep]

Please pray for me to have a sound mind and not give in to suicidal thoughts.

I will surely pray for you.

 

[Papou]

In regards to the OP not being caused by a demon is really something that only God himself knows not us..I have personally experienced many struggles at an emotional and psychological level that has been spiritual in origin which I have been set free from..and the accounts I had new testament of people being set free from evil spirits are not written in a metaphorical sense..they are written as an actual account.
I can personally testify to understanding this spiritual dynamic to human life as a Christian and of course not everything is spiritual.
In fact our generation is at times more ignorant to how the kingdom of darkness operates..things like Harry Potter...and many other things are expressions if this kingdom..
I have been through dark times of suicidal thoughts mental torments..levels of mental illness and know the various methodologies available..Nothing worked for me..
my struggles were not flesh and blood and it took a while to grasp this...God set me free from the spiritual forces that were the root cause..it was a real experience..not some mind trick ect..
Demons do exist and the bible gives us a very clear insight into this invisible realm which we have the victory through jesus to overcome.

Thanks for your testimony ! We agree on many things but have different explanations for it. Yours is based on old-culture perceptions, mine is based on irrefutable modern science ! In regard to the OP, God gives me the gift of discernment, and it is clear that "not_abandoned_2020" is a good person, who will overcome her mental disorder and be a great citizen of this world.

 

[Encouragement]

Thanks for your testimony ! We agree on many things but have different explanations for it. Yours is based on old-culture perceptions, mine is based on irrefutable modern science ! In regard to the OP, God gives me the gift of discernment, and it is clear that "not_abandoned_2020" is a good person, who will overcome her mental disorder and be a great citizen of this world.

Belive me mine is not based on any kind of so called old culture perceptions as you call it.If it was just based purley on perception there wouldn't be any actually factual events recorded in the bible nor in real life to support it.Are you implying that the accounts of jesus setting people free from demonic harrassment and control,the disciples doing the same thing when he sent them out..to "that part" of the great commission jesus gave..are all based on mere perceptions?
So you are disputing what the bible has recorded as actual real life events?
I have complete belief that not_abandoned_2020 has every hope to be free in jesus name and I am not disputing their worth here(I highly regard this dear individual and have real empathy towards their situation)...but what you are expressing an unbelief in which is a clear fact in scripture and even in real life is what i dispute.
Anyway we're here to bless not_abandoned_2020 and bring light into the darkness that surrounds her at this time

 

[not_abandoned_2020]

I spoke with my pastor. I told him everything. He and his wife both sat and spoke with me for a long time.

He apologized for upsetting me with his announcement to the church about demons. I asked him what I should do. He told me that he and his wife love me and will be there to support me if I needed it. They told me that I am welcome to come back and be a part of their church community. Also, they told me that the people who prayed over me were all pastors and some medically trained. They were mostly concerned because I was thrashing around and saying strange things. I thought they performed an exorcism, but they really were just praying for me and holding me to stop me from running out of the church. Some people thought I was going to hurt myself.

As for the demon thing...One of the people who dragged me away told the pastor that I was manifesting demons, and he announced it. He wasn't in the room when I was being prayed for, so he can't be sure what happened. He said it isn't anything to be worried about being judged for because a lot of people were concerned and asking if I was okay.

The pastor's wife is trained in counseling and said my mental illness may be emotional, chemical, spiritual, or a combination of all three. It's hard to know without a doctor present. But she does not believe I am possessed, just oppressed by the negative thoughts and voices I have in my mind. She said that the voices are trying to convince me of what is not true. She said that I am not evil or crazy, and God loves me very much.

As for treatment, I don't know how that will go. I may have to travel out of the city to a more specialized medical center, and someone from the church will help me with transportation if I need it.

My church turned out to be supportive and all-around amazing.

Thank you all for responding. It gave me the courage to reach out for help. Thank the Lord for His blessings!

 

[Encouragement]

I spoke with my pastor. I told him everything. He and his wife both sat and spoke with me for a long time.

He apologized for upsetting me with his announcement to the church about demons. I asked him what I should do. He told me that he and his wife love me and will be there to support me if I needed it. They told me that I am welcome to come back and be a part of their church community. Also, they told me that the people who prayed over me were all pastors and some medically trained. They were mostly concerned because I was thrashing around and saying strange things. I thought they performed an exorcism, but they really were just praying for me and holding me to stop me from running out of the church. Some people thought I was going to hurt myself.

As for the demon thing...One of the people who dragged me away told the pastor that I was manifesting demons, and he announced it. He wasn't in the room when I was being prayed for, so he can't be sure what happened. He said it isn't anything to be worried about being judged for because a lot of people were concerned and asking if I was okay.

The pastor's wife is trained in counseling and said my mental illness may be emotional, chemical, spiritual, or a combination of all three. It's hard to know without a doctor present. But she does not believe I am possessed, just oppressed by the negative thoughts and voices I have in my mind. She said that the voices are trying to convince me of what is not true. She said that I am not evil or crazy, and God loves me very much.

As for treatment, I don't know how that will go. I may have to travel out of the city to a more specialized medical center, and someone from the church will help me with transportation if I need it.

My church turned out to be supportive and all-around amazing.

Thank you all for responding. It gave me the courage to reach out for help. Thank the Lord for His blessings!

Hello my dear I am glad to hear that the has been developments regarding your situation which must be really refreshing for you.God is most definitely with you and will NEVER leave your side.I pray that you get the right kind of support structure set up in place for you and that God reveals the root to the strongholds in jesus name.From my own experiences of mental health related issues there are often a combination of factors that contribute and often there have been doors that have given the enemie access to establish various dynamics within our lives.I agree that you cant actually be "possessed" by a demon in that sense...though as time goes on and God reveals any influences that are spiritual I wn sure he will guide you to complete freedom and victory.You have your whole life ahead of you and God has a wonderful plan for your life and he is committed to see that no weapon forged against you shall prevail..You are a blessing regardless of what you are going through..🤗🤗

 

[levi85]

Lord we bring not_abandoned_2020, and this prayer request before you. Please bless & you be glorified, in Jesus merciful name, Amen!

 

[Magenta]

I disagree with you the OP is not a demon !

Who said she was? Nobody that I saw.