I was an usherer at church when I was stationed in Aschaffenburg, Germany (over 20 years ago). One Sunday night the service was ending and the Pastor was praying, just as he said amen, without any warning from my body, I let out the loudest fart, I have ever heard. Everybody in the congregation look back at me and my best friend. And he just point his finger at me, I got chewwed out by everybody.