Tacky behavior

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Jullianna

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Have you ever had someone with whom a relationship didn't go well (or at least the way THEY wanted it to) say ugly and/or untrue things about you? I know it's stupid to let it get to you, but, we're all human and it does, doesn't it? I hate it when that happens because there must have been good/special things about those people that drew us to them. Seeing the ugly side of them is not what I want to remember... Kinda sad...I like to end things on good terms if at all possible.

Oh well, I guess personal relationships are a lot like the law I work with...you can accuse someone of anything, but that doesn't mean it will stand up in court. Sure wastes a lot of time and money though.
 
Yeah I've had a couple of gals over react when the end had come upon it. Seems like a combination of manipulation and their desire to express their pain.
 
1 still waters i think it depends on the relationship for me and if they ended it cos theyve got a wrong idea about me or theyve treat me bad ly , how theyve ended it .. i freely admin there are times ive vented if i beleive ive been treeted badly or the person says or beleives something about me whats incorrect..
 
Julianna i freely admit my ugly side has come out in relationships , however this is when ive been manipulated or lied to on nurmerous occasions by the same person, its not sometihing i like about myself but its something whats a bug bear with me..Ive realised not all relationships in life go how you want to, either because the persons lied and manipulated you, or because they beleive or say something about you whats not true.. ive learnt to handle it better cos i hate it when my ugly side comes out .. REcently a friend of mine accused me of something id not done and reported me to the british RSPCA a for animal neglect, then got personal about my appearance and personality and called me a using ***** through texts and voice mail.. I was shocked but i dealt with it by ignoring it and cutting off the friendship rather than responding and saying things back about her :(
 
My policy has always been to keep my mouth shut and always remember that I have to look at myself in the mirror.
 
Hurting people hurt................this doesntm mean I always have what it takes to keep my mouth shut when someone is hurtful to me........but I try to remember it and keep it at the fore front of my mind when someone is doing or saying hurtful things............
 
Jullianna said:
Have you ever had someone with whom a relationship didn't go well (or at least the way THEY wanted it to) say ugly and/or untrue things about you? I know it's stupid to let it get to you, but, we're all human and it does, doesn't it? I hate it when that happens because there must have been good/special things about those people that drew us to them. Seeing the ugly side of them is not what I want to remember... Kinda sad...I like to end things on good terms if at all possible.

Oh well, I guess personal relationships are a lot like the law I work with...you can accuse someone of anything, but that doesn't mean it will stand up in court. Sure wastes a lot of time and money though.
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I have had this happen. Recently in fact. Someone that I figured was a VERY good friend......but as time went on, I could tell there was not a very good balance in the friendship.

She really tried to *micromanage* areas of my life and our friendship...and it weighed on me a great deal as time went on.

When I did finally speak up and have a conversation with her about it, it did not go well either. :(
She ended up stalking my neighbor on FB and saying some really horrible things to her about me in an email. :( and then stalked my neighbors husband at work (they both work @ the FBI together...but in seperate areas, and have never met before)...and she tried to talk to him as well. (he did not want any part of it lol)

I ended up losing work due to her rumors and gossip....and therefore it ended up hurting my children because her actions, ended up taking away my ability to care for my kids.

Rumors and gossip will NEVER benefit. It will always hurt.

Being adults and having adult conversations when problems arise is what is best....but as I learned, people get defensive with that because its no longer them in control and the outcome is out of their control. So in order to get back into control...they have a tendancy to get really ugly. :(

Thankfully her attempts to sabotage my friendship with my neighbor did not prove fruitful! (I really enjoy them so much, they are good people.)

We also have to remember that God sees it all, and His word does say that no weapon formed against us will prosper. And that all works He has started in us, He WILL complete. To prosper us, and NOT to fail us. (so hard to lean on those words sometimes when the hurts of another cut so deep though.)
 
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