Hi Summer,
We come to Jesus in FAITH, faith is BELIEVING in something you cannot see.
By faith we believe that Jesus is God and became man and walked among us being tempted as we are.
By faith we believe that God as a man was put to death for the PENALTY of our sins that we would not be held accountable for,in believing.
He was buried,lay in the grave three days and rose again,a resurrected God,who now sits at the right hand of the Father!
I do not know the mind of God except what I find in his word!
Paul/ Saul was an Hebrew among Hebrews! He knew the law and precepts backwards and forwards. But.....when Jesus came to him he asked Saul,why do you kick against the pricks?
The Holy Spirit will prick or pierce our hearts about what we need to know and do,we just have to yield unto him.
Sometimes we try in our own flesh to hard to find what we are looking for.
I would say to you to just REST in the Lord. If you are his your relaxing will allow the Spirit to ease your concerns and if he is still waiting on your complete surrender,relaxing in him will allow him to give peace to your heart you are his.