Quitting giving to church

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TheIndianGirl

Guest
#1
This year I have not given money to my church so far primarily because I did not feel connected to my church. More specifically I was not connected to my church physically (everything has been remote, which isn't an excuse), but more importantly I felt my church (pastor and most members) was too political which became quite evident during the election season. So this year, I have been "lazy" about giving even though I intended to but just put it off because I was plain annoyed. I have also been thinking of changing churches for awhile once I return to my work city. In any case, I will give the full amount I intended to give at the beginning of the year this month. However, next year, I do not plan to give to this specific church but I will give to another church or to a Christian charity.

My questions are, do you think I should continue giving to this church if I don't find a new church next year?

Do I need to notify my church about my membership and tell them I may not/won't be giving next year? Regarding membership, what I have observed is that people plan/or move but do not notify the church. So our membership count is much higher than people in attendance. This seems to be quite common.
 

Roughsoul1991

Senior Member
Sep 17, 2016
8,885
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#2
This year I have not given money to my church so far primarily because I did not feel connected to my church. More specifically I was not connected to my church physically (everything has been remote, which isn't an excuse), but more importantly I felt my church (pastor and most members) was too political which became quite evident during the election season. So this year, I have been "lazy" about giving even though I intended to but just put it off because I was plain annoyed. I have also been thinking of changing churches for awhile once I return to my work city. In any case, I will give the full amount I intended to give at the beginning of the year this month. However, next year, I do not plan to give to this specific church but I will give to another church or to a Christian charity.

My questions are, do you think I should continue giving to this church if I don't find a new church next year?

Do I need to notify my church about my membership and tell them I may not/won't be giving next year? Regarding membership, what I have observed is that people plan/or move but do not notify the church. So our membership count is much higher than people in attendance. This seems to be quite common.
The same reason I'm not a paying union member is that they support candidates who go against God.

Unfortunately, I wish my church was more involved in politics on the level of taking political issues and teaching what is a Biblical view.
 

Mii

Well-known member
Mar 23, 2019
2,082
1,330
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#3
This year I have not given money to my church so far primarily because I did not feel connected to my church. More specifically I was not connected to my church physically (everything has been remote, which isn't an excuse), but more importantly I felt my church (pastor and most members) was too political which became quite evident during the election season. So this year, I have been "lazy" about giving even though I intended to but just put it off because I was plain annoyed. I have also been thinking of changing churches for awhile once I return to my work city. In any case, I will give the full amount I intended to give at the beginning of the year this month. However, next year, I do not plan to give to this specific church but I will give to another church or to a Christian charity.

My questions are, do you think I should continue giving to this church if I don't find a new church next year?

Do I need to notify my church about my membership and tell them I may not/won't be giving next year? Regarding membership, what I have observed is that people plan/or move but do not notify the church. So our membership count is much higher than people in attendance. This seems to be quite common.
Well, reaching out to them does give an opportunity to have some discussion. If no discussion takes place when you reach out, that'd be the answer for me (short of further leading by the Holy Spirit).

Could be that this is the process for you to branch out and find another church and maybe you have been stagnating and lazy about that? Idk. Seems like this church isn't meeting your spiritual needs and it doesn't hurt to be more intentional about looking.


Or consider looking into some independent organization that focuses on what you are passionate/have a burden about...like homeless, orphan, widow ministry etc. etc. Or perhaps there is something like that at this church you are a member of and it's still going strong but rarely talked about. There were plenty of ministries at a large church I once went to that you didn't ever hear about and there was an option to specifically give to these things rather than the general church funds.

Speaking with your wallet isn't unreasonable. Even if it's a pittance, I think God sees that (widows mite). It might be years before leadership at a local body does, but if they are a legitimate church I expect they will be aware eventually.

I don't care to pay for your new "vision" of a 10 million dollar building or stuff that's well outside what I find reasonable, but there are lots of ways to use money in a local body that most would feel probably very pleased with. Even ministry projects that some would like to start but don't have the funds because it goes to other things. I'm NOT going to allow bitterness about how funds are used at churches dominate the good things that DO occur. Even asking the church if you can set aside some money to help with someone's childcare expenses or rent payment if they reach out (if and only if). Conditional giving does have its place. Even sponsoring a once a week event for homeschoolers to hang out with other homeschoolers would only cost snacks/drinks/food. $30/week or $60/bi-monthly.

That's how I work though, having ideas and doing something new on a shoestring budget. That isn't to say that the entrenched monetary system in your church is "wrong" or that if they aren't open to new ideas or you to have more of a say with where your money goes at a church is "wrong"...idk if it is or not. What I do think is that I can just go somewhere else "no harm no foul". Each body is different and it could just be they dance the salsa and you are looking for the tengo. Nothing "wrong" with that...our loyalty is to Christ and by proxy the body...not a building or any specific local body. It "can" be, but if you aren't moved that way or are being moved away from that, see where it leads you :)
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#4
some people give money some give time.
others give clothing or books, or maybe that spare can of beans

I dont think it matters WHICH church you give to, God will see you being a cheerful giver and that matters to Him.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#5
I dont understand the membership thing, you'd only do that if you were like 'paying dues' like the church was operating as an exlcusive club or something.

Clubs often do things like yearly/annual subscriptions. But churches dont operate that way in general membership is more of a spiritual thing where you belong to the body of Christ. and sometimes, you move around within that body (which is worldwide now)
 
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tstumf

Guest
#6
I would say focus your giving in the areas you most experience Christ work in your daily life . This isn’t necessarily giving to a corporate church for say, but could be depending on what you see. Our money by all means is really “Kingdom” money in Gods Kingdom and we are to be responsible stewards of his money. You hold that authority as a steward of his money to spend it where it will make the most impact for his Kingdom. Sometimes that means giving to a church organization but sometimes it may mean diversification between several organization or ministries that may not necessarily be official churches holding official services but reflect Christ like character in the community and the message they convey to the community. I believe this is what was really intended by tithe. Ideally we would want to see our brick and mortar churches thrive but if Holy Spirit is giving you movements in your heart that they aren’t stewarding correctly then we need to move what we are responsible for to areas where we believe it will make the best impact for Gods Kingdom . It’s the people in the church revealing the work of Christ that make it a church. If that’s not happening it’s nothing more than a community building with a social club without spirit or fruit showing that meets within the walls and that is “religion” but Christ and his character being reflected in the body is what makes it “church”.
 

Genipher

Well-known member
Jan 6, 2019
2,300
1,713
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#7
I dont understand the membership thing, you'd only do that if you were like 'paying dues' like the church was operating as an exlcusive club or something.

Clubs often do things like yearly/annual subscriptions. But churches dont operate that way in general membership is more of a spiritual thing where you belong to the body of Christ. and sometimes, you move around within that body (which is worldwide now)
I agree. Never saw the point of becoming a "registered member". The only difference it makes, I guess, is that those that are members get to vote for deacons, etc. So I guess in that extent it is a sort of "club".
 

Billyd

Senior Member
May 8, 2014
5,245
1,660
113
#8
What you give, how you give, and who you give to, is between you and God. Just remember, a gift is a gift. Once you give it, it belongs to the person or organization that you give it to. If you place conditions on the what you say you are giving to God, you are trying to buy something that is not for sale.

If you are attending a church that you feel doesn't meet your spiritual needs, find a new church. Before you move, I suggest that you take a little time and study 1 Corinthians, especially chapter 12. Remember there are many people in a church, but without the one Holy Spirit, it is only a building.
 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
13,222
10,755
113
#9
That's a great question @TheIndianGirl and my answer would be to not give to a Church that's not feeding you Spiritually but disturbs you. I do believe we are to give, so if not a church presently then as you said aid the poor. I actually make turkey sandwiches and other things with my 'delectable' lol, leftovers and pass them out with a bottle of water. These homeless people appreciate it so much.
Anyway, I know the Holy Spirit will give you peace with this, He knows our hearts and will light our paths✨💛✨
 

Aaron56

Well-known member
Jul 12, 2021
3,040
1,796
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#10
I give to the one who watches over my soul not to a denomination or a person with a title.
 
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TheIndianGirl

Guest
#11
I dont understand the membership thing, you'd only do that if you were like 'paying dues' like the church was operating as an exlcusive club or something.

Clubs often do things like yearly/annual subscriptions. But churches dont operate that way in general membership is more of a spiritual thing where you belong to the body of Christ. and sometimes, you move around within that body (which is worldwide now)
I agree. Never saw the point of becoming a "registered member". The only difference it makes, I guess, is that those that are members get to vote for deacons, etc. So I guess in that extent it is a sort of "club".
I never liked the idea of being a "member" in a specific church, which is why I delayed so long as I never wanted to tie myself to just one church and forbid myself from going to the church across the street. However for this reason I see the practical aspects of having members because it means one is committed to a church and that is a good thing. Like, the pastor and leadership usually want you, your kids, and your grandkids and so forth to continue going to the same church like in the old times. It so happened that leadership wanted me to get involved in a committee, which I gladly accepted, but soon it came about that it looked better if I am also a member as well (if I wanted to participate).

If people want to be part of a leadership team, and especially the deacon positions or church administration, at least in my church being a member is required. Members also get to vote no various issues related to selection of leadership, budget issues, etc.
 
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TheIndianGirl

Guest
#12
That's a great question @TheIndianGirl and my answer would be to not give to a Church that's not feeding you Spiritually but disturbs you. I do believe we are to give, so if not a church presently then as you said aid the poor.
Ideally we would want to see our brick and mortar churches thrive but if Holy Spirit is giving you movements in your heart that they aren’t stewarding correctly then we need to move what we are responsible for to areas where we believe it will make the best impact for Gods Kingdom .
Remember there are many people in a church, but without the one Holy Spirit, it is only a building.
It is complicated because I do believe the Holy Spirit dwells in my church, and I believe the pastor and attendees are sincere in the faith. However, it is so obvious what they believe politically based on things said and their reactions and so I do not believe I need to put up with that on a pretty regular basis.
 

Genipher

Well-known member
Jan 6, 2019
2,300
1,713
113
#13
I never liked the idea of being a "member" in a specific church, which is why I delayed so long as I never wanted to tie myself to just one church and forbid myself from going to the church across the street. However for this reason I see the practical aspects of having members because it means one is committed to a church and that is a good thing. Like, the pastor and leadership usually want you, your kids, and your grandkids and so forth to continue going to the same church like in the old times. It so happened that leadership wanted me to get involved in a committee, which I gladly accepted, but soon it came about that it looked better if I am also a member as well (if I wanted to participate).

If people want to be part of a leadership team, and especially the deacon positions or church administration, at least in my church being a member is required. Members also get to vote no various issues related to selection of leadership, budget issues, etc.
My husband is on the worship team and teaches one of the preteen classes a couple times a month, but he (we) aren't members. Our church will let us help without being members, we just can't vote on anything. 🤷‍♀️
 
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TheIndianGirl

Guest
#14
Sometimes that means giving to a church organization but sometimes it may mean diversification between several organization or ministries that may not necessarily be official churches holding official services but reflect Christ like character in the community and the message they convey to the community. I believe this is what was really intended by tithe.
I have not heard anything consistent on how to give. I have spoken with a couple of pastors on this who believe we should give at least 10% to the church, and should only donate to other organizations after we meet this amount. At the same time, I also know Christians who believe it is fine to give to several places.
 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
13,222
10,755
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#15
It is complicated because I do believe the Holy Spirit dwells in my church, and I believe the pastor and attendees are sincere in the faith. However, it is so obvious what they believe politically based on things said and their reactions and so I do not believe I need to put up with that on a pretty regular basis.
In one of my prayer groups, the same, very sincere but when it comes to politics, an unfortunate hateful attitude prevails. One lady who I like, said she wished a person on the other party had gotten shot. I had to switch to another group because of the disrespect and not prayers, like we are instructed to do for our officials.
 

Billyd

Senior Member
May 8, 2014
5,245
1,660
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#16
It is complicated because I do believe the Holy Spirit dwells in my church, and I believe the pastor and attendees are sincere in the faith. However, it is so obvious what they believe politically based on things said and their reactions and so I do not believe I need to put up with that on a pretty regular basis.
IMHO, it is time for you to take this problem to your prayer room. Lay every detail of your problem in the Lord's hands. If you are having difficulty doing this, friend to join you. Remember, God says where two or more are gathered in His name (prayer), he will be with you.
 

Billyd

Senior Member
May 8, 2014
5,245
1,660
113
#17
I have not heard anything consistent on how to give. I have spoken with a couple of pastors on this who believe we should give at least 10% to the church, and should only donate to other organizations after we meet this amount. At the same time, I also know Christians who believe it is fine to give to several places.
I believe that we are to give (amount between you and God) to the church until all the community ministries are funded. If your church's ministries needs are met, then you can freely give to others.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#18
I once gave to this bible charity, was givng every month to buy bibles but had to tell them I would stop (I changed jobs and didnt know what I would be earning) otherwise they would keep sending me appeals. I think I did the same thing with sponsoring a child.

I dont know how your church is doing things but the churches Ive been to you just gave whatver amount you wanted any time you attended church. Nobody actually checked on how much you were earning, or when you gave or whether it was this amount or what day you gave it. You are meant to give in secret anyway.

I think once a year they had appeals like a self-denial month (really, just another name for fasting) where you saved and then gave it all at once in the collection. But usually churches take up a collection every week, but it doesnt mean people go or have to give every single week.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#19
The political thing (and whether or not its related to giving) I think if does not sit comfortably with you then if you have any doubts that the money or whatver you give is going to fuel an agenda you not agreeing with then dont.

eg rich people dont need your money...they already have heaps.
 

Rhomphaeam

Active member
Dec 14, 2021
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England
www.nblc.church
#20
This year I have not given money to my church so far primarily because I did not feel connected to my church. More specifically I was not connected to my church physically (everything has been remote, which isn't an excuse), but more importantly I felt my church (pastor and most members) was too political which became quite evident during the election season. So this year, I have been "lazy" about giving even though I intended to but just put it off because I was plain annoyed. I have also been thinking of changing churches for awhile once I return to my work city. In any case, I will give the full amount I intended to give at the beginning of the year this month. However, next year, I do not plan to give to this specific church but I will give to another church or to a Christian charity.

My questions are, do you think I should continue giving to this church if I don't find a new church next year?

Do I need to notify my church about my membership and tell them I may not/won't be giving next year? Regarding membership, what I have observed is that people plan/or move but do not notify the church. So our membership count is much higher than people in attendance. This seems to be quite common.
The pulpit is not a political theatre to express any other view than to pray for those in authority in so far as the issue of political meanings are concerned. Prayer groups are not the place to be expressing hateful frustration - such as wishing someone had been shot. The confession - one to another and before the Father is the place to be plain and honest about how we feel ourselves. On the other hand a building that is a registered place of public worship can be used for all manner of meetings that in truth have nothing to do with the gospel of grace and a preparation for the gospel of peace. In that sense the building becomes an extension of the community in which it is located. Whereas, the body of Christ is the church. It all depends on the pastoral ministry and the eldership. So seeing as we are all under authority then ask those in authority privately. You may receive a blessing or you may be corrected - then ask whether you need to give notice of quitting your membership before you leave if indeed you remain in that mind after you have submitted to the governing body of the church by asking. We cannot escape the need to be under authority - but we do not need to be afraid to speak privately and ask for direction in a matter of removing ourselves from the membership role of a church - how we should do that is according to your local church leadership. Let them direct you in the manner and let the Holy Spirit direct you as to your obedience.