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Boanerges
Guest
A lot of people say me I need to have more than one option when i want to date. Sometimes I've seen this like not correct. But they say you increase your chances of get a gf. What do you think?
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Ugly
Guest
Found it difficult to understand your question. Are you saying people tell you to date more than one woman? If that's the case then that is pretty much taking God out of the equation. That has nothing to do with guidance & is just a 'herd em through til i get lucky' mentality. The problem is people adopt a mentality that they need to hurry & get married. That without being married they are incomplete & their life is incomplete. Instead of focusing on making their lives complete Now.
Also i don't see the concept as very respectful. You ask a girl out, have a date or two, then brush her off & move to the next one. Sounds shallow. Also if you date multiple women what happens when more than one clicks? Now you're in this situation of having to choose. Doesn't seem fair to either woman.
I prefer waiting til someone catches my attention, then taking time to form a friendship & see if we develop any other feelings. Its a much nicer sense than a string of memories of bad dates, or not being called back over & over.
Also i don't see the concept as very respectful. You ask a girl out, have a date or two, then brush her off & move to the next one. Sounds shallow. Also if you date multiple women what happens when more than one clicks? Now you're in this situation of having to choose. Doesn't seem fair to either woman.
I prefer waiting til someone catches my attention, then taking time to form a friendship & see if we develop any other feelings. Its a much nicer sense than a string of memories of bad dates, or not being called back over & over.
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Jullianna
Guest
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buckeyegirl700
Guest
I don't think there is a problem if someone is open to meeting people and dating. For example if I was going on a date I wouldn't mind if he decided things didn't work out and next weekend ask someone else on a date. However I wouldn't think it was nice if a Christian man lead me to believe that he was into me and took other women out on dates at the same time without telling me.
Women dont like to be two-timed, so it would be best to play it safe and date one at a time. What if you were dating a girl and found out that she was also dating other men while dating you? See my point?
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Boanerges
Guest
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Jullianna
Guest
I don’t think there’s a problem with dating more than one person if you are just trying to get to know them better, unless:
1. There’s an understanding that you are dating exclusively or you lead them to believe this. If this is the expectation of either party, it needs to be made clear to prevent a needlessly painful misunderstanding later on;
2. The people you are dating know one another well. It seems unkind to put them into what they may perceive as a competition that may eventually cause ill feelings. You may decide that you don’t want to date either of them and a friendship is ruined in the wake; or
3. The “L” word has been spoken. If you want someone to take a declaration of love seriously, continuing to date other people is an absolute no-no.
HOWEVER, dating one person at a time is the best way to make certain that you don't needlessly hurt anyone and it says clearly that you are not a player.
1. There’s an understanding that you are dating exclusively or you lead them to believe this. If this is the expectation of either party, it needs to be made clear to prevent a needlessly painful misunderstanding later on;
2. The people you are dating know one another well. It seems unkind to put them into what they may perceive as a competition that may eventually cause ill feelings. You may decide that you don’t want to date either of them and a friendship is ruined in the wake; or
3. The “L” word has been spoken. If you want someone to take a declaration of love seriously, continuing to date other people is an absolute no-no.
HOWEVER, dating one person at a time is the best way to make certain that you don't needlessly hurt anyone and it says clearly that you are not a player.
Hmm.... this actually kind of answers a thread I was about to make. =) (2 birds 1 stone)
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Jullianna
Guest
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Liz01
Guest
so...are you talking about having a replacement in case that your date go away?
it doesnt seem correct, because then you are focusing only in having a gf and i think is important to focus in the personality of the person when you chose a partner
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah
Guest
i usually have at least 0 to 1 guy i can choose between... yeah, i really like to keep my options open
Different people connect differently too. Like Tonight I went and watched a movie at a girls house and then we played a board game. It was just the two of us, nothing too crazy. She is fun but, there isn't really any chemistry there. I could go full on pursuit I'm sure. I could draw it out into a Facebook Relationship Status Change or tell her that I think she's fun to hang out with a lot but, I know that there isn't anything going to come of it. Its mostly because we never seem to get any closer than where we started.
Tomorrow I'm probably going to be fixing another girl's garbage disposal. We'll probably grab a bite or watch a movie but, every time I hang out with her, we build on what seems to be an existing foundation. We progressively talk about more and more about things that are important to us. We genuinely enjoy each other's company. Also there is "the Look" that says, I enjoy spending time with you and that makes me happy.
Tomorrow I'm probably going to be fixing another girl's garbage disposal. We'll probably grab a bite or watch a movie but, every time I hang out with her, we build on what seems to be an existing foundation. We progressively talk about more and more about things that are important to us. We genuinely enjoy each other's company. Also there is "the Look" that says, I enjoy spending time with you and that makes me happy.
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah
Guest
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NodMyHeadLikeYeah
Guest
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NukePooch
Guest
The reason you're getting 'the look' is because you're fixing her garbage disposal. Next time, tell her to hire a plumber and see what kind of look you get.
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NukePooch
Guest
Well, I'd trust what Zero says, after all, he's in the medical field. He knows what he's talking about.
Next time, Nod, don't take any more of your dates to an all-you-can-drink coffee tasting event.