I also noticed she didnt know how to play with her child, didnt have any books to read with her, nothing. One thing to give children toys and something to do, but another to interact with their child, to talk and laugh etc.
I dont know if this is a class thing, but it does seem upper or middle class mothers are quite happy to pay someone else to look after their children even from birth, and go back to work or adult life themselves. These part time mothers are happy to drop their children off to nursery, daycare, or have nannies doing all the hands on stuff, changing nappies, feeding, walking, supervising, etc. The only thing they need to do then is pick them up and put them to bed. They miss out on all the things their baby is learning whle awake!
I dont quite get it but its very real, the mums doing this, going back to work and saying i cant stay at home, Despite the children hating HATING being dropped at someone elses home, or daycare for the entire day. And it may not be even for the reason of having to earn money, because the cost of that care just negates the mother staying with the child.
Well, I do remember with my first thinking, "What do I DO all day with this infant?" lol.
My mom did daycare, I had a baby brother when I was 16 that I helped take care of (bottles, diaper changes, potty training, etc), but there was still that adjustment period of how to interact with a new, helpless human.
I had all kinds of exposure...am not an only child...and still found my groove.
My point is that it doesn't matter if you were an only child or had a group of siblings, there will be an adjustment period to parenthood and for most of us, it's a natural instinct.
Being part of the whole daycare thing growing up, it was my understanding that many households just couldn't make it on one income. Hang out on a "baby/mom" site and you'll see a myriad of families that do the budget and find it's cheaper to both work and send the kids off to daycare. Those that find that daycare washes out the second income generally stay home.
I've also provided daycare before and the mother HATED leaving her babies and going off to work. She told me she wanted to be a stay-at-home mom but she and her husband didn't make enough for health care, etc. etc. unless she worked.
Are you as adamant against public school as you are daycare? A lot of kids hate that environment
just as much as being dumped at daycare. My sister used to hold on to the front door and scream because she didn't want to go to school and mom had to pry her fingers loose and load her on the bus. I used to LOATHE public school and wished my mom would homeschool, like my stepmom did.
Look, I get what you're trying to say but you make everything so
absolute when it's not.
Not
all men are horrible fathers who sit on their rears and let the woman do all the work.
Not
all mothers are glad to dump their kids at daycare.
Not
all kids hate being at daycare (the kids my mom watched became my best friends and we had a wonderful time playing before and after school and during the summers).
Not
all only children crave a large family or struggle to take care of kids because they haven't had as much exposure as kids in large families.
It's an
individual thing, not an "all people like 'x' are this way" thing.
