Christian matchmaking services

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tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,598
17,062
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Tennessee
#81
Sometimes I thought “Really God? What was the purpose of that date?” He just prolonged me for the one who He had for me. Isn’t it kind of scary though… even though I really feel she is the one for me until I meet my maker, so many don’t make it. I guess that’s thinking negative, which I know I shouldn’t be doing. It takes work… every day to make it work… which I’m ready for.
You are right Brother Mike, anything worthwhile, especially a prospective relationship that may lead to marriage, takes work. The game of love is not one for the timid and tentative. You pray for a prospective spouse, perhaps months and years, and if or when an opportunity arises, you must take bold and decisive action. I commend you on staying the course.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
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#82
basically you dont take 'no' for an answer, you just wear her down till she caves.

This is how one of my neighbours told me how he married his wife. Then he said he was moving out and I could rent his house.

I am not sure that the ambush method is one I would have chosen.
 

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
Jan 8, 2018
1,617
1,671
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#83
You are right Brother Mike, anything worthwhile, especially a prospective relationship that may lead to marriage, takes work. The game of love is not one for the timid and tentative. You pray for a prospective spouse, perhaps months and years, and if or when an opportunity arises, you must take bold and decisive action. I commend you on staying the course.
Thank you for your encouragement 😊, I felt peace and that enabled me to take bold and decisive action.
 

BrotherMike

Be Still and Know
Jan 8, 2018
1,617
1,671
113
#84
basically you dont take 'no' for an answer, you just wear her down till she caves.

This is how one of my neighbours told me how he married his wife. Then he said he was moving out and I could rent his house.

I am not sure that the ambush method is one I would have chosen.
Me either lol
 
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ChristianTonyB

Guest
#85
The book I read 138 dates (lady went on 138 dates before finding the ONE) used e-harmoney, tinder, and match.com

I dont think she was a christian though, the most famous of those would be christian cafe or christian mingle. A movie was actually made of Christian Mingle starring Jennifer Love Hewitt.

If you are dealing with hundreds if not thousands of applicants, then running a matchmaking website service would take a LOT of time.

I know with job hunting, that also takes time. Sometimes you apply and never hear anything back, or only receive replies months later. Job Recruitment agencies can be hit and miss. sometimes leads never go anywhere. Its actually worse than looking for a missing person, because you dont even KNOW where that person is but worse, you dont even know what this person really looks like or what their name is.
I’ve changed my mind about not responding to comments, L.

Thank you for offering your opinion.

Yes, it would take a lot of work, but I wouldn’t expect there to be a huge demand, because of the (rightful) concerns that have been expressed, so it would be slow going. But it can be done, bit by bit, step by step. I’m personally a bit of a pedantic sod, so I don’t rush things, and I ‘dot’ and ‘cross’ every step of the way.

In truth, I think your advice for lonely Christians to approach their church groups leaders is the best solution. That would work well providing the pastors are sympathetic (or better still, empathetic) to the needs of the lonely and others in need of help (single parents) in their congregation. The church groups will need to have a social structure and interactions to assist members meet likely suitors, and I’m not meaning singles group meetups, but rather Christian extended family social meetups, through home and neighbourhood church groups. In the absence of these being available to those in need, then a third party alternative that’s not needing financial support to survive, might be a necessity! Shalom
 
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ChristianTonyB

Guest
#86
I did try Christian Mingle and a few others. Was generally unimpressed with all of them. My conclusion was that I would have better luck creating my own dating app from scratch.

Get this, most of these sites you are on there with the intention of meeting someone... but the site actually PREVENTS you from communicating with others unless you have a membership. HOW DOES THIS MAKE SENSE? The point of the internet in general is communication, FREE communication. So why would you go to a dating site to have your communication ability LIMITED?! Yeah, that makes sense! Not! :/ :/ :/ :( :[ :{

Oh yes, this subject pushes my buttons, lol
Yep, they are about making money more than giving help!
 
Jan 5, 2022
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"A higher plane," hehe
www.youtube.com
#87
I thought pastors were meant to do the sheep breeding. What do I know?
Well, I lost a potential wife that way. The pastor endorsed a relationship despite her parents not liking the guy, but they didn't feel like they could speak up about it. For over a year, her dad was always "this close" to telling her to break it off, but he never did.

Then they made the fellow a pastor after the couple married. I stopped going to that church.

The same pastor actually told me he thought someone in the church would be a good match for me when I started going there. I thought nothing of it at the time... until his meddlings cost me the woman I loved. Then I began to see the parallels between the situation and the manipulations of the cult group I was briefly involved with in college.
 

iamsoandso

Senior Member
Oct 6, 2011
8,048
1,609
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#88
Hi Everyone,

I’m wondering if you know of any Christian matchmaking services that, in order to do their best to filter out the ineligible from the outset and determine if a person’s interest in the service is genuine, requires participants to provide:
  • A Statement of Faith (state when and how we were spiritually born again/converted to Christianity, including a paragraph that defines what we believe is a proper Christian lifestyle);
  • Proof of Identity (eg a Photo ID such as a current Drivers Licence, that displays our Date of Birth and PostCode for where we live);
  • A Police Check/Clearance Report acquired within the last 6 months;
  • A properly completed personality profile with a current photo plus other modest pictures, scripted using clean language, showing a well defined list of personality traits and interests, and a list of the desired characteristics of an ideal partner including any age group preferences;
  • If we’ve had a broken marital or de facto relationship, then we will be required to provide a statement declaring why we believe we are eligible for remarriage.
If you do, or have any thoughts on the matter, please let me know.

Shalom,

Tony

Just be sure to understand what "sha zhu pan"(butcher the pig) is. It's the new internet scam 7.5 billion worth last year and innocent places like Christian sites are like magnets because of the trust aspect. I'm Not saying it in aspect to CC but because your asking about "a place". This is also common in other nations so be careful about it.
 
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ChristianTonyB

Guest
#89
Well, I lost a potential wife that way. The pastor endorsed a relationship despite her parents not liking the guy, but they didn't feel like they could speak up about it. For over a year, her dad was always "this close" to telling her to break it off, but he never did.

Then they made the fellow a pastor after the couple married. I stopped going to that church.

The same pastor actually told me he thought someone in the church would be a good match for me when I started going there. I thought nothing of it at the time... until his meddlings cost me the woman I loved. Then I began to see the parallels between the situation and the manipulations of the cult group I was briefly involved with in college.
JS, in my opinion not many pastors/elders out there have been appointed by God, but rather appointed by a religious institution, mainly because the person meets its criteria which seems to include loyal adherence to denominational observances and attending formal religious meetings, and have maybe completed some kind of religious tertiary course, etc, even though they might be devoid of well developed Christian lifestyle skills. In my experience, as much as they have been willing to help and have put effort in, the advice and workings from suchlike have often proven to being next to useless, and sometimes have even bordered on being anti-Christ! I personally don’t know of any church or leadership I could send a brother or sister to for help, and feel that they would be given that in a dedicated Christlike manner. Not one! Which is the main cause for me floating this thread…. getting people to think more deeply about God’s organisational abilities, and what He is expecting from the body of His Son as a whole!
 
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ChristianTonyB

Guest
#90
Just be sure to understand what "sha zhu pan"(butcher the pig) is. It's the new internet scam 7.5 billion worth last year and innocent places like Christian sites are like magnets because of the trust aspect. I'm Not saying it in aspect to CC but because your asking about "a place". This is also common in other nations so be careful about it.
Yes IASAS, thank you for the warning. I am aware of this, so am looking at what ‘official’ services are out there where people would be confident in divulging some of their private information to, without fear of it being stolen or misused. Vetting interested parties authenticity in respect of their ID, their understanding of what Christianity truly is, and their eligibility for marriage is crucial to the kind of service I’ve asked for comment on. Any such service has to being honouring to our God and His ways in every way, for it to be pleasing to Him and therefore successful.
 

iamsoandso

Senior Member
Oct 6, 2011
8,048
1,609
113
#91
Yes IASAS, thank you for the warning. I am aware of this, so am looking at what ‘official’ services are out there where people would be confident in divulging some of their private information to, without fear of it being stolen or misused. Vetting interested parties authenticity in respect of their ID, their understanding of what Christianity truly is, and their eligibility for marriage is crucial to the kind of service I’ve asked for comment on. Any such service has to being honouring to our God and His ways in every way, for it to be pleasing to Him and therefore successful.
lol, at my age I'm not often able to ride in my car long enough to even go to Church anymore but my family members still do. In the old days counseling was pretty much straight forward but from the things I hear nowadays the internet has totally changed the counseling offered because of the internet. I would almost say it would be difficult to find anyone who would give their personal information over the internet but not after the conversations with members who are involved in counseling. Not that they would tell me of personnel situations they've encountered but in general the vast amount of issues are via the internet now days. From things I've learned though look very close at the address bar at the top of an page,,hover over the "lock" and read it, then make sure it isn't ";"(dot,comma) instead of ":"(two dots),,,verify "https" and things like ".com" or ,COM or C0M ect. this is a zero "0",,,this is a capitol "O" this is a small case "o",,,this is all three side by side "0Oo"(some of the things often alerted on fake web pages)
 
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ChristianTonyB

Guest
#92
lol, at my age I'm not often able to ride in my car long enough to even go to Church anymore but my family members still do. In the old days counseling was pretty much straight forward but from the things I hear nowadays the internet has totally changed the counseling offered because of the internet. I would almost say it would be difficult to find anyone who would give their personal information over the internet but not after the conversations with members who are involved in counseling. Not that they would tell me of personnel situations they've encountered but in general the vast amount of issues are via the internet now days. From things I've learned though look very close at the address bar at the top of an page,,hover over the "lock" and read it, then make sure it isn't ";"(dot,comma) instead of ":"(two dots),,,verify "https" and things like ".com" or ,COM or C0M ect. this is a zero "0",,,this is a capitol "O" this is a small case "o",,,this is all three side by side "0Oo"(some of the things often alerted on fake web pages)
Yes, that’s true.

The church is the people of course, not a building or meeting place. It’s a shame the church is not able to meet with you, and at your location!
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,415
9,401
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#93
I personally don’t know of any church or leadership I could send a brother or sister to for help, and feel that they would be given that in a dedicated Christlike manner. Not one! Which is the main cause for me floating this thread…. getting people to think more deeply about God’s organisational abilities, and what He is expecting from the body of His Son as a whole!
That's a pity. I've heard about towns like that, where there are a lot of churches but they are all worthless... But I've never seen one myself.

Maybe you should just move to a different town. We have a great church, if you ever decide you want to move to southwest Tennessee. :giggle:
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,598
17,062
113
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Tennessee
#94
That's a pity. I've heard about towns like that, where there are a lot of churches but they are all worthless... But I've never seen one myself.

Maybe you should just move to a different town. We have a great church, if you ever decide you want to move to southwest Tennessee. :giggle:
We may be attending your church for a service in the not too distant future.
 
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ChristianTonyB

Guest
#95
TonyB,

I know you said you wouldn't be answering anymore posts here, but if you ever do discover or start up such a site, please come back and let us know.

I would be very interested in learning how such a site can be ran successfully, and if it seemed like something God was allowing me to do, would most definitely consider joining if I didn't feel I had to display too many personal details right off the bat.

Best wishes to you!
Absolutely SS, will do. Thank you for showing an interest. I’m still thinking it through, and am endeavouring to find a service that people will feel comfortable giving some of their personal information to, and that can vet their eligibility to join in such a service. The matching making service itself doesn’t need to be directly involved in the vetting, they just need to be confident that the vetting service has been thorough, and protects the interests of participants. We will need to know that anyone interested in participating is not a scammer, doesn’t have a criminal record that would exclude them, knows what true Christianity is, and is truly eligible for remarriage if they have been divorced. As far as someone’s suitability for marriage (as against eligibility) is concerned, this can be picked up from how they conduct themselves on chat forums on the site, and at any organised social activities they attend. Shalom. Tony 🙂
 
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ChristianTonyB

Guest
#96
We may be attending your church for a service in the not too distant future.
Well, T, if you and I are members of the body of Christ, then we are already attending the same church, and the services being delivered aren't being done to any formal or regimented religious agenda, but targeting the specific needs of every member. 🙂
 

Butterflyyy

Well-known member
Oct 31, 2019
1,615
1,318
113
#97
I was thinking last night🤔...the late Derek Prince had awesome testimonies of how God brought marriage about for him, not once but twice after his first, dear wife Lydia went to be with the Lord.
The book is called, ‘ God Is A Matchmaker.’
I’m so blessed by this thread lol it’s made me want to order the book, and I really need to get back into reading! 🤗
I read a wonderful book by Lydia Prince called,’ Appointment In Jerusalem.’ It was such a blessing.
I’m looking forward to reading Derek’s book now...🦋
Lol who replies to their own quote??!!🤣...but anyways, I just wanted to give an update that I ordered this book of Derek Prince’s online... and I have to say it is amazing!!! I’m halfway through after only one day; it is so encouraging, edifying and exciting😃🤗 I would highly recommend it 🥰
Be blessed ✝️🦋
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,415
9,401
113
#98
We may be attending your church for a service in the not too distant future.
Well, T, if you and I are members of the body of Christ, then we are already attending the same church, and the services being delivered aren't being done to any formal or regimented religious agenda, but targeting the specific needs of every member. 🙂
I bet he put me on ignore and you just confused the crap outta him because he doesn't see the context for your statement. :LOL:
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
42,598
17,062
113
69
Tennessee
#99
I bet he put me on ignore and you just confused the crap outta him because he doesn't see the context for your statement. :LOL:
Yeah, I don't believe that I will be attending a church service in Down Under in the near future. Or distant future for that matter.
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,433
2,419
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Absolutely SS, will do. Thank you for showing an interest. I’m still thinking it through, and am endeavouring to find a service that people will feel comfortable giving some of their personal information to, and that can vet their eligibility to join in such a service. The matching making service itself doesn’t need to be directly involved in the vetting, they just need to be confident that the vetting service has been thorough, and protects the interests of participants. We will need to know that anyone interested in participating is not a scammer, doesn’t have a criminal record that would exclude them, knows what true Christianity is, and is truly eligible for remarriage if they have been divorced. As far as someone’s suitability for marriage (as against eligibility) is concerned, this can be picked up from how they conduct themselves on chat forums on the site, and at any organised social activities they attend. Shalom. Tony 🙂
Why do I get the feeling that any website or service attempting to determine whether a divorced person is truly eligible for remarriage or not is a lawsuit waiting to happen?