Why do men and women hate each other?

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Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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Im not sure why people bother to get married, its so expensive.

Its better to be friends, and enjoy your life than be permanently tied or dependent on someone , but theres just this weird thing that people think marriage its the be all and end all of life. Its not.

I dont even know why people bother asking about marriage. I mean what is the big deal about it anyway. Who cares if you are married or not? I dont. Being single isnt something to be pitied.

I just think its weird why anyone would feel sorry for someone who isnt married. I would probably feel more sorry for someone who was and their spouse was being a jerk to them.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
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huh ok

so it was money.
sugar daddies supply money. Is she now owner of a business and making money? Wonder why she didnt just go to instant finance and get a loan...which she'll then spend years paying back with compound interest...but thats what happens if you want money instantly.

some women marry for money obviously. If its not enough they will bolt. I am not sure how anyone can get tired of christianity, like get tired of believing.

Maybe the going to church part, but thats not all Christianity is. Those that wait on the Lord and renew their faith will not grow weary or faint.

was the church you belonged to one of those name it and claim it types, with health and wealth gospel, promising money and cures. Because a lot of professed christians go to those, not for Jesus but so they can get money and not have to care for others. Of course people can believe in that 'faith is a force' message but thats actually not the gospel.
Nothing personal, but I really don't feel like talking about the past right now.

At present, my main concern is the status of her soul and the souls of our three children.

My ex regularly takes Jesus' name in vain now, and I've heard both of our daughters take his name in vain recently as well. In fact, our eldest daughter did it just earlier today. I had a very serious talk about this with my two daughters before, and when my eldest did it again in front of me today, she immediately apologized after receiving an unhappy glance from me.

Anyhow, their eternal destinies are my primary concern, so that's what I'm focusing on. The past is the past. I endured it solely by the grace of God, and I learned a lot from it. Now, I've got to deal with my present life situations.

That's about all that I can say right now...
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
1,383
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Im not sure why people bother to get married, its so expensive.

Its better to be friends, and enjoy your life than be permanently tied or dependent on someone , but theres just this weird thing that people think marriage its the be all and end all of life. Its not.

I dont even know why people bother asking about marriage. I mean what is the big deal about it anyway. Who cares if you are married or not? I dont. Being single isnt something to be pitied.

I just think its weird why anyone would feel sorry for someone who isnt married. I would probably feel more sorry for someone who was and their spouse was being a jerk to them.
This was never fully the case until recently, but I'm actually thrilled to be single right now. I know that I've mentioned a particular woman at work recently, but I really don't even think about her either. As I've said before, in theory, women are my favorite part of God's creation. In practice, however...well, that's a completely different story.

Anyhow, I'm good.

Aside from defending the gospel, I truly am a very mild-mannered and peace-loving man. I'm totally NOT into strife and contention. When women are involved? Well, it's just constant strife of some sort or another, and I'm never the originator of it. That's been my personal experience anyway, and it's not meant as some sort of blanket condemnation of all women. As I've readily acknowledged before, most men are horrible, too.

Again, I'm good just as I am right now. In fact, I'm very, very good.

If another woman ever gets close to me, then it's literally going to be a miracle.

My eyes are wide open...
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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well, people say love is blind

it just seems a lot of people get into marriages completly unaware that for majority of couples, it smostly because money is involved. Its a financial transaction. People dont seem to understand that!

those who get widowed often found to their surprise they run out of money....?!
for the wife who had no income..,maybe because the husband was too pigheaded to 'allow' her to work...she soon fnds herself in a desperate situation.

also men seem very surprised that, a woman finds a man that earns money more attractive than a man that has no job. hmmm I wonder why?
 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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be careful, about what churches you daughters get involved in, not sure how old they are

just so many phony churches nowadays
a good grounding in the Bible will stand them in good stead rather than any kind of churchianity.

and because your daughters will grow to be women too, they need to learn from female elders who stayed faithful to God not faithless (whether married or not married)
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
I just think its weird why anyone would feel sorry for someone who isnt married. I would probably feel more sorry for someone who was and their spouse was being a jerk to them.
I think being in a happy marriage with very minimal marriage issues is ideal, and better than being single. Parents won't live forever, and siblings have their own lives/priorities. Spouses may not live long either, but at least there is a good chance they will to about average life expectancy. Being single there is as greater risk for loneliness, and loneliness breeds new issues. But, I do believe being single is way better than being in an unhappy or unhealthy marriage.
 
T

TheIndianGirl

Guest
it just seems a lot of people get into marriages completly unaware that for majority of couples, it smostly because money is involved. Its a financial transaction.
Recently I've been thinking I would be financially better off (assuming husband is also working) if I were married. My couple friends are more likely to buy homes and start building equity, and if renting, rent isn't as huge a burden on them. Meanwhile I have to pay for everything on my own. Personally I would not get married for financial reasons (I would definitely have to love the person first), but I can see how financial reasons can be a big motivator especially for someone struggling to live on their own.
 
Nov 26, 2021
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India
I think the important thing is to prepare oneself, with God's Grace, to be a good spouse, when the day comes (assuming marriage is God's Will for you). Like other good things in life, marriage is predestined and God will see to it you meet your partner when the time is right, like He brought Isaac and Rebekkah together, if one is waiting on Him, and faithfully doing His Will.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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I think the important thing is to prepare oneself, with God's Grace, to be a good spouse, when the day comes (assuming marriage is God's Will for you). Like other good things in life, marriage is predestined and God will see to it you meet your partner when the time is right, like He brought Isaac and Rebekkah together, if one is waiting on Him, and faithfully doing His Will.
they were cousins, it didnt take much lol
just giving camels water
which is what people usually do, they dont let camels die of thirst
 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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it was probably the equivalent of meeting your spouse at the petrol station pumping gas.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,177
113
Recently I've been thinking I would be financially better off (assuming husband is also working) if I were married. My couple friends are more likely to buy homes and start building equity, and if renting, rent isn't as huge a burden on them. Meanwhile I have to pay for everything on my own. Personally I would not get married for financial reasons (I would definitely have to love the person first), but I can see how financial reasons can be a big motivator especially for someone struggling to live on their own.
the bubble soon bursts on that one when you find youself pregnant with a brood to look after though

and in huge debt with a huge mortgage...a lot of people dont surive that , especially if work falls through and they have no extra support for their children
 

Lanolin

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Dec 15, 2018
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also the thing with building equity, does not compute because homes wear and tear and deteriorate
most people just bulldoze the exisitng home down and sell the land ...the land will be worth more than the home ever does,,sometimes it actually costs more to renovate and make a home livable than buying a brand new house.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
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well, people say love is blind.
As a man once told me many years ago:

"Love is blind, but marriage is an eye-opener."

Anyhow, I'm definitely NOT against marriage in theory because it was ordained of God to be a natural reflection of the spiritual union between Christ and the church.

That said, in practice, such is rarely ever, if ever, the actual case.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
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be careful, about what churches you daughters get involved in, not sure how old they are

just so many phony churches nowadays
a good grounding in the Bible will stand them in good stead rather than any kind of churchianity.

and because your daughters will grow to be women too, they need to learn from female elders who stayed faithful to God not faithless (whether married or not married)
My two daughters (and my son) have no interest in church whatsoever because of their past horrible ordeals at the churches my ex used to take them to. I warned her that those churches were HORRIBLE and that they would have a negative impact upon our children, and such has indeed been the case. That said, I've been sharing the true word of God with my children since they were infants, so they know what the truth is. My son has always been open to it. My eldest daughter is presently quite hostile to it, but she does have moments when some of it seems to penetrate her soul. My second daughter is sort of like an elevator...up (-ish) one moment and headed down towards the basement another moment.

Anyhow, again, I can assure you that they know what the truth is because I've personally shared with them the full counsel of God's word throughout their lifetimes.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
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they were cousins, it didnt take much lol
just giving camels water
which is what people usually do, they dont let camels die of thirst
it was probably the equivalent of meeting your spouse at the petrol station pumping gas.
(Worried that he might be a candidate for marriage, he takes a quick assessment of his possessions and realizes that he owns neither any camels nor a car, but only a jar of honey, and he lets out a great sigh of relief)
 

SteveEpperson

Junior Member
May 12, 2018
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At the risk of letting this thread drone on and become over-ripened, I would like to add my two cents worth.

My prayer is that our large institutional churches will finally step up and lead the way here. Great marriages between men and women start with making disciples instead of spectators.

Unfortunately, that is not what's happening today. Young people are dragged to church by their parents, kicking and screaming. Then, when they move away from home, they ditch the church for worldly pursuits.

Alternatively, our young people get sucked into mega-churches promising that if they just praise the Lord loud enough, jump up and down a lot, and give enough money, they will have a happy life.

Men and women get along best when they work together to make the world a better place. Outside looking in, the best marriages I have ever witnessed are the ones where both the husband and the wife are serving together in the church or on mission trips.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
1,383
639
113
At the risk of letting this thread drone on and become over-ripened, I would like to add my two cents worth.

My prayer is that our large institutional churches will finally step up and lead the way here. Great marriages between men and women start with making disciples instead of spectators.

Unfortunately, that is not what's happening today. Young people are dragged to church by their parents, kicking and screaming. Then, when they move away from home, they ditch the church for worldly pursuits.

Alternatively, our young people get sucked into mega-churches promising that if they just praise the Lord loud enough, jump up and down a lot, and give enough money, they will have a happy life.

Men and women get along best when they work together to make the world a better place. Outside looking in, the best marriages I have ever witnessed are the ones where both the husband and the wife are serving together in the church or on mission trips.
If you ask me, then the real culprits in what you've described here are the parents, and not the churches (not that I'm a defender of our churches because they're mostly corrupt).

After all, it is the parents' responsibility to train up their own children in the way that they should go.

Sad to say, most children are dumped into the public school system by their parents, then they head off to secular colleges in order to be further brainwashed or indoctrinated, and then some of them even wind up in apostate churches to boot for further brainwashing or indoctrination.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
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I'm definitely NOT against marriage in theory because it was ordained of God
to be a natural reflection of the spiritual union between Christ and the church.
A Spiritual reflection of the Supernatural union between Christ and the church ;):D
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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If you ask me, then the real culprits in what you've described here are the parents, and not the churches (not that I'm a defender of our churches because they're mostly corrupt).

After all, it is the parents' responsibility to train up their own children in the way that they should go.

Sad to say, most children are dumped into the public school system by their parents, then they head off to secular colleges in order to be further brainwashed or indoctrinated, and then some of them even wind up in apostate churches to boot for further brainwashing or indoctrination.
intteresting

I wouldnt say children are 'dumped' into public school, maybe in the US is the case
because here in nz education is compulsory until age of 17

however those who cant or dont attend school for whatver reason, do miss out, perhaps fail to achieve literacy and end up being 'dumped' in jail.

not everyone even gets to college/uni or whatver as its expensive and there are more pressing needs. Its more than what many parents can even afford.

its kinda weird the road public schools have gone down in the US, but its probably cos they are under resourced and over crowded compared to private schools which are paid for and are richly endowed.

why do parents have children they cannot afford to care for or be present with well thats another question entirely.
 

Live4Him3

Jesus is Lord
May 19, 2022
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639
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intteresting

I wouldnt say children are 'dumped' into public school, maybe in the US is the case
because here in nz education is compulsory until age of 17

however those who cant or dont attend school for whatver reason, do miss out, perhaps fail to achieve literacy and end up being 'dumped' in jail.

not everyone even gets to college/uni or whatver as its expensive and there are more pressing needs. Its more than what many parents can even afford.

its kinda weird the road public schools have gone down in the US, but its probably cos they are under resourced and over crowded compared to private schools which are paid for and are richly endowed.

why do parents have children they cannot afford to care for or be present with well thats another question entirely.
Education, which is more like "indoctrination", is compulsory here as well, but I need to clarify what I meant.

When I said that children are dumped into the public school system by their parents, I was contrasting that with the very real option of homeschooling their own children.

Anyhow, my overall point was that it is the parents' responsibility to train up their own children, but they more often than not dump that responsibility upon others (the school system, the church, etc., etc.) and then complain about the results of the same.