I'd rather be told the truth....even if it's blunt than be told a lie.
"The cuts of a friend are more sure than the kisses of an enemy."
What Kind of Husband Do You Want?
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"The cuts of a friend are more sure than the kisses of an enemy."
If he wants chicken for dinner but i want fish, then guesss what? It will be chicken and fish on the menu. He has his chicken, I have my fish.
Careful. Don't let people manipulate your emotions. All the women around me love me (some a little too much) and only dislike me if I don't give them something they want from me (attention or validation, etc.).
Whoever is accusing me of disliking women is following my threads and looking to start trouble. One or two of them had a man comment and rebuke me for not responding to them. I put him on ignore with them. I'm not following their threads because I could care less what they have to say as I've seen their own misandry and man-hating attitude.
Use your discernment, get a full story before making final decisions, don't let anyone into your emotions, and don't let anyone use your masculine need to defend women to deceive or manipulate you. This way, you'll be better equipped if you were ever to choose another mate.
I don't know who you're responding to because I've put several people on ignore so I don't have to see their comments. But it's apparent what you're responding about.
I don't have any apologies when I tell the truth. It's good to speak it with Grace, but it's good to speak it at all in a world where truth is hated, especially by those who don't want to change and grow.
I can walk into any room, church, building, etc., and pick up on the overall climate (ie. mindsets, value system, and practices of the people there). This makes it easy for me to pick up on people's attitudes (ie. how they are on the inside) even in their writing or typing online. One of many examples of this:
I recall when my mom tried and tried to poison me against my sister-in-law (younger brother's wife). Let's call her Shelly and call my brother Joshua. My mom said Shelly had written her a five-page letter attacking her, calling her names, etc. Before my encounter with God, I would automatically have sided with my mom (which doesn't mean I'd be against Shelly, but I'd simply believe my mom). But this was after the encounter. I'd gone to high school with Shelly and Joshua (Joshua and I were very close and got in enough fights that I didn't get to walk on graduation but he did a year later). Shelly and Joshua had a high school romance: a lot of boys wanted Shelly, but she wanted Joshua; and a lot of girls wanted Joshua, but he wanted Shelly. Shelly wasn't a hostile person and would only have been hostile to my mom if my mom had been hostile towards her.
When my mom told me that Shelly had been hostile to her in that letter (my mom even shed the tears and everything), I asked how that was true. She expected me to just believe her. (Men need to be aware of this-- when women want men to believe them just because they're women: #BelieveAllWomen.) I insisted on seeing the letter that Shelly had written her that she said was hostile. My mom got angry and refused. For the next three days, my mom would accuse Shelly to me, then get angry when I insisted on reading Shelly's letter so I could see for myself if my mom was right. On day four or five, my mom gave up and handed me the letter. Probably like most people, she didn't think that you can pick up on a person's attitude, meanings, or intentions in written words. She was wrong. I can often lift hidden messages off a page (this also happens often when I read the Bible) because that's just a thing God gave me. I combed Shelly's five-page letter over one or two times but only really needed to red it once. There was nothing Shelly had written that could be reasonably construed to be hostile towards my mom. I wasn't happy with my mom and didn't take her side.
During my encounter with God, He told me that the identity I was living at the time was not my real identity and said He would draw my real identity to the fore. The change was instant. Before the encounter, girls thought I was cute, but overall as far as relationships and all that were concerned, I was average to them. The very day of the encounter with God (it happened on an Amtrak train between Baltimore and Atlanta so that the person who walked on to the train was not the person who walked off), women started treating me different. I don't care for admiration, bragging, all the things most people love; but all the girls at my new job and neighborhood were after me. My aunt, who I lived with in Atlanta, even had women at her own job who she said wanted to meet me just from pictures she had of me as her nephew on the job; and her son, my cousin (a weakling of a man who hated and was jealous of me and wanted me dead, dead, dead)-- whose name was Austin (and whose best friend was Steve, so I called them "Stone Cold")-- admitted to me that girls at his job wanted to know who I was after I stopped by one day (Steve didn't mind admitting it). At the apartment pools, girls were turning around when I walked in and some of the guys didn't really want me around. It was at that time that twenty married women at work wanted to sleep with me. So, what happened? God drew my real identity (which is located in all men, mostly 'beneath' in cultures that attack masculinity) to the fore which 'resurfaced' my masculine double-foundation of I could care less and simultaneously I care a lot. People are valuable enough to care about but not valuable enough to tolerate their bs. It's both and most people don't know what's up when they see both together.
I'm not slow when it comes to discerning people's heart motivations, intentions, etc., and I have a natural tendency to look down the road when I'm in a situation or interacting with someone in order to know what could come of any interaction or relationship with them. I understand why people act like they do (often quickly but not always quickly). This is because of what God called me to. I can easily sense and won't tolerate hostility or passive-aggressiveness, nor will I tolerate anyone who wants to influence my or another person's life-- to foist their own will on and over the will of another person. This level of self-centered to coldly (without conscience) desire to control others is pure witchcraft, and witchcraft and I do not and cannot get along. God gave people free will; people who try to override others' free will are definite enemies of mine.
And finally, Jesus said that people who do evil (and enjoy it and never want to change) naturally hide their evil so they are not discovered but that people who do good are honest and transparent as they have nothing to hide. I recognize people who either defend evil or who want to hide their own evil as people who are not loyal to any human being (or to God) but themselves and therefore are toxic and untrustworthy, so I separate myself from them if I can because I don't like to waste time. Women who are quick to change the topic when the faults in women are brought to light (or who attack those who expose these faults) are doing so because those faults are in them and they don't want to change or remove them but want to retain them while blaming others as being [wrong, bad, etc.]. Such women are 100% bad news, at least to a heterosexual man. The question I have for people who don't like truth to be exposed or even discussed is "Why?"
"And this is the verdict, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed. But he who does the truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be clearly seen, that they have been done in God" (John 3:19-21).
I currently work with some men who are constantly fighting and backstabbing everyone to be 'elevated'. People who want to be elevated betray the fact that they feel so low about themselves. While my male coworkers chase women, women chase me. And I'm not trying to perform or elevate myself. I am who I am (by God's Grace) and let me tell you, I love myself A LOT. Lol.
A wealthy and sought-after jackass is better than a miserable human being. If you keep whining like that, then prepared to be single for the rest of your life... or worse, to find 'someone' and just get cheated on because your whine just doesn't do it for her. I prefer to have women chase me (according to the rules you follow, a man who women chase has a lot of value, so there goes that notion), tell them to get lost, have them accuse me of conceit (the tears, I tell you), and keep pursuing the reason I was created (purpose) and the woman who is not like other women. This gives me even more value in the eyes of others and in women's eyes. It's a great feeling being free and all. Now, to experience the fulfillment of God's promises...
I once knew a guy who was in his 60s. He'd married a woman from Vietnam, and they had a daughter together. He said she was a good girl until they moved to America and she took up "Women's Lib". I'd never heard anyone say "Women's Lib" as many times as he did in the several months I went to his church. His wife was raising their daughter to have those man-hating beliefs and made him feel like a monster just for existing. He'd gotten her a green card and made a lot of money off her business preparing taxes. Now he was obsolete to her. She was a callous Jezebel who'd been reminded that men are the enemy; but she was able to take advantage of him because he had been raised on 'the Ahab Diet'.
They say, "You are what you eat." The Ahab Diet isn't literal food, but you do eat (imbibe) it. As this guy complained and complained about his wife, I figured I better talk to God about it. When I did, He showed me this: in the U.S., men are raised on an 'Ahab Diet'. Ahab was the Israelite king who married Jezebel and let her run the country. Men in the U.S. (and other countries, yes) are raised to be nice, polite, and to cater to women: they let women do wrong and also protect, aid, and abet their wrongdoing. Add to men the natural pride (ie. "I'm God and God is not") and self-centered nature that everyone is born with and you have a catastrophe called 'the Ahab spirit' (Ahab mindset). God showed me that His power (ie. the supernatural, etc.) manifests primarily through bold people.
(Like many truths, this fact is overlooked in the Bible. But if you look again from OT to NT, you'll see that God's power manifested through people who were bold and willing to put their lives on the line (but not through the immature, cowardly, and self-preserving) and that the bolder and more willing to put their lives on the line they were, the greater the supernatural power was available to and manifested through them. This truth is manifested most literally and most evidently in Jesus Christ, in His life, death, resurrection, and ascension.)
So, God showed me that all these revivals that all these churches are praying for... We're not waiting on Him for revivals; He's waiting on us. If we keep praying for revivals while we're on the run and hiding in caves (ie. we're scared of putting our reputations and well-being on the line), revivals will never come. One or more people need to step up boldly, and that's when God will honor the prayers. American men are 'trained' to not care for issues of social justice (due to their self-centeredness). If you look at all the organizations in America that promote social justice of any kind, probably around 90% are founded, run, or chaired by women. Women leading causes of justice instead of men is the same as women going to war while men stay back and hide. It's anomalous (and abominable). So, while women through feminism are indeed trying to destroy entire countries (and they're too hateful and blind to even see it), the absence of testosterone is really the cause. Jezebel can't do anything without an Ahab. Crazy women don't have the authority to spew their wickedness on anyone; they need a man to give them the authority or to let them usurp the authority. We see this throughout the Bible and history and in 1Kings 21 where Jezebel needed and got Ahab's authority/approval to kill an innocent man (just like she needed and got his authority/approval to kill God's prophets).
Crazy women and lazy men. Both need to be addressed. One causes constant and actual damage (crazy women: Jezebel) while the other jus sits there idly and lets it happen (lazy men: Ahab).
I only have a moment because I need to leave for another grueling day of work shortly.
Trust me, I've got plenty of discernment. I'm no novice when it comes to life in general, and especially not when it comes to the Christian life.
In this particular instance, I honestly don't know what you believe because I've hardly read any of your posts. Rarely, if ever, do I read all of the comments in any thread on this website. My normal modus operandi is to skim through threads, and I oftentimes use what somebody else has said as a sort of springboard to say something that I personally feel needs to be said.
Furthermore, there are PLENTY of members on this website, both males and females alike, who basically hate my guts or who have nothing but contempt for me. In reality, I'm a godly Christian man, so I don't immediately let other peoples' opinions sway me in any direction because, quite frankly, I have great concern for the spiritual conditions of quite a number of posters on this website.
Anyhow, my contributions in your threads have all basically had the same goal in mind:
To remind husbands or potential husbands that they are called by God to love their wives as Christ loves the church, and to remind wives or potential wives that they are called by God to reverence their husbands as the church reverences (or should reverence, anyway) Christ.
This truth alone is rejected by many men and women here in my own observations. I can literally feel the contempt, not only for me, but for Christ himself, at times when I've posted on this particular topic.
Well, like I said, I've got to get ready for work, so I need to go.
The Subhuman dude and someone else (I forgot his name) had the opinion that I'm trying to gain followers and make a religious cult. One of them congratulated the other on his ability to 'discern' me as a false dude (LOOOOOOOOOOOOL). I replied to him and the other dude (I forgot his name, lol) that neither one of them has any 'discernment'.
Like people who have a personal but unwarranted issue against someone else (reminds me of the Pharisees to be honest), neither responded to me. Not sure about the other dude (some names just don't count), but apparently Subdude is talking bad about me but not bad to me. Hey, Subdude, you're safe online. Talk to me here. If you can't talk me online where you're safe, I mean what use are you in the land of the living? Have you an Ys with that X, or have you two Xs? Let's talk.
Most christians hate God. I grew up in church and picked up the overall 'cultural climate' (ie. the mindset/worldview, value system, and beliefs) of modern christianity. After my encounter with God, I saw church for what is was spiritually speaking: the Lord ain't there, not because He doesn't want to be 'there' or because He's too good or they're not good enough but because they don't want Him there. My best friend was a new christian, but one day he told me, "I feel like I'm not loved in this church. I feel like the people here don't love me." I immediately responded to him the way a parent might chide a child, "Of course they don't love you. They're christians; they don't love anyone." What a precedent modern christians have set for everyone.
I didn't say that in spite or resentment; I said it as fact and was surprised that he didn't know the real 'unspoken rules' in christianity (I forgot he was a new christian) which are "Be sure to always keep God at arm's length (lest He becomes Lord over your life and then you can't have any fun or do what you want to do), and be sure to never love anyone (lest they take time and energy (and maybe resources and money) away from you that you should be spending on your own self)." Jesus comes to be Lord; christians intuitively know this, so they keep Him at arm's length as only Savior. Caring about others also cuts into your own self-centerdness and life; christians know this, so they are careful to not care about others, even if they want to care. It's all human psychology, and it's all practical.
But I could care less what christians think of me. No adult takes a two-year-old's opinions on them or on life seriously. I like worldly people. They're fun to be around and are honest. Jesus had the same experience when it came to the religious and the sinners. He drank alcohol with the sinners and was able to hang out with even prostitutes because they were humble humans; they were'nt hateful hypocrites. Have a great day at work!
It's weird seeing all these comments to people I've put on ignore because I see people talking into the space and don't see what they're replying to. Keep your peace at all costs. I put some people on ignore so I could keep mine. I don't do the arguing thing. It's craziness.
Your cat has all but one of the five traits you mentioned? I'm looking at two that your cat can't have: godly and has income. Of those two, it'd probably be better for you if your cat had income. Godliness can wait. Lol.
Oh, she's not the only one 'chasing me' and trying to poison people against me. Open your eyes and read between some lines. Most people will probably spaz out if they get to do [insert something here] for many years without consequences and then one day many years later are finally told, "Um, that thing you're doing is wrong."
The ignore button is very available. If someone disagrees with me, they should put me on ignore rather than trying to convince others that "He's such a bad guy!" I mean, all men are innately bad so that shouldn't be news.
I'll help out, though I'm not single my husband and I have only been married 10 years so my single days and finding someone I considered perfect are fresh enough in my mind.
I wasn't looking for a spouse. I was okay in my own life, confident and comfortable in my own skin. I didn't "need" a man for anything, but the thought of having someone to grow old with wasn't a bad thought, just not a priority and definitely an actual fear. Everyone who bothered asking me out got a very solid no as a result.
Then I met the man I married.
He is highly intelligent, book smart and had the ability to make me think. For me that's rare, as I have a higher intelligence myself and love a good intellectual challenge. Not only that, but we had a main interest we shared.
So, if your smart don't hide it, and go for women more your intellectual equal that you actually share a common interest with. Gives you things to talk about together that you both enjoy.
Also, and I can't describe it other than to say I saw Christ in him.. everything I imagined Jesus is and was as a human being I saw in this man. He didn't have to tell me he was Christian I knew he was without a word. He could be hard and unrelenting, he could be sweet and tender, he could be judging, he showed an uncommon mercy and had no fear of anything, and the patience of Job. He was quiet and unassuming, but his presence filled the room.
He was, in my estimation, everything a Christian should be. He still is that for me, and I look up to him even all these years later.
So, let Christ shine through with your actions. Be desirable on a spiritual level.
Other than that, looks have never been big on my list, but my one caveat being a tall woman is that I wanted to feel smaller and feminine around whoever I was going to be with and my husband is 6'2. I'm happy, I got a tall thinner man. I'm not attracted to fat people but that's just me, some people are... I would have accepted heavyset though if he had my husbands qualities.
I wasn't looking for a spouse. I was okay in my own life, confident and comfortable in my own skin. I didn't "need" a man for anything, but the thought of having someone to grow old with wasn't a bad thought, just not a priority and definitely an actual fear. Everyone who bothered asking me out got a very solid no as a result.
Then I met the man I married.
He is highly intelligent, book smart and had the ability to make me think. For me that's rare, as I have a higher intelligence myself and love a good intellectual challenge. Not only that, but we had a main interest we shared.
So, if your smart don't hide it, and go for women more your intellectual equal that you actually share a common interest with. Gives you things to talk about together that you both enjoy.
Also, and I can't describe it other than to say I saw Christ in him.. everything I imagined Jesus is and was as a human being I saw in this man. He didn't have to tell me he was Christian I knew he was without a word. He could be hard and unrelenting, he could be sweet and tender, he could be judging, he showed an uncommon mercy and had no fear of anything, and the patience of Job. He was quiet and unassuming, but his presence filled the room.
He was, in my estimation, everything a Christian should be. He still is that for me, and I look up to him even all these years later.
So, let Christ shine through with your actions. Be desirable on a spiritual level.
Other than that, looks have never been big on my list, but my one caveat being a tall woman is that I wanted to feel smaller and feminine around whoever I was going to be with and my husband is 6'2. I'm happy, I got a tall thinner man. I'm not attracted to fat people but that's just me, some people are... I would have accepted heavyset though if he had my husbands qualities.
Both you and your husband sound like people I'd like to meet.
It's good to not need a man. Someone who needs someone is often fickle. Desire is great. Need is not. (Psalm 37:4.)
Intelligence is important so the world opens up a lot more to you and you're not both always rolling around in your emotions.
The patience of Job. Oof. God must have a special liking for him. Good stuff.
More than anything else, I wish you and your husband the best, many blessings in this life (and children if you want them), and that fullness of Life Jesus promised that makes life Life. (2John 1:2.)
My cats are more Godly then most men I have met. Meaning they love me no matter what when one aspect. When I am down they encourage me. When I am sick they are by my side. Which to some may think well that's what cats do. Not my cat Willow. She is not a lap cat. But she will not leave me when I am sick. My ex I would almost have to beg to get me medicine when I was so sick with the flu . He didn't feel like going out. Just saying ,think that over
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Ruby123
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My cats are more Godly then most men I have met. Meaning they love me no matter what when one aspect. When I am down they encourage me. When I am sick they are by my side. Which to some may think well that's what cats do. Not my cat Willow. She is not a lap cat. But she will not leave me when I am sick. My ex I would almost have to beg to get me medicine when I was so sick with the flu . He didn't feel like going out. Just saying ,think that over
A landlord I once had would ask me to go to the chemist and get her medication for her if she was unable to instead of her own husband. I thought that was sad. I would never want to be in a marriage like that.