Teen modesty....

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Aug 6, 2021
161
18
18
#41
As long as your motivations are pure I don't see anything wrong with that you're wearing. Again, the main focus of modesty isn't about the type of clothes that you're wearing or how much skin that you're showing, but what your motivations are for wearing the clothes that you wear.
 

EnglishChick

Well-known member
Apr 20, 2021
673
349
63
42
England UK
#43


This may not be your style... but, you can dress modestly and still be stylish and cute :D


Also, an assortment of scarves are wonderful accessories :D

Not necessarily like the scarf in the 2nd photo ;)

PS~ I am too old for cute any more :giggle:

But I still like to look nice (or at least presentable) while in public (y)

those are pretty for the cold weather. In summer weather t shirts and best or tank tops are good because comfortable . Just don't wear any low cut or that show your bra.
 
#44
Honestly, this has been something on my mind as well.
My parents never allowed me to wear dresses/skirts that were short...like above the knee in public. If I were to wear one...I had to wear it with a legging. It was annoying for me...coz I preferred to wear dresses that were short and didn't understand why they were so strict about it. But, eventually I understood why certain clothes aren't suitable as a Christian.

Though, I see a lot of Christian girls who wear stuff like crop tops and shorts. And there's nothing wrong with that. As long as you're respecting yourself😊 I love wearing shorts and crop tops but sometimes it depends when you're going out and whom you're gonna be with. I'm still not allowed to show off too much skin😅 even if I 18...and it's annoying...coz I feel myself when I wear certain clothes and other clothes that are bit too old fashioned I feel restricted.

Anywayyyy, this isn't about me.
In conclusion, generally, wear appropriately of course. And something that makes you feel comfortable and respected. Dress like a daughter of a King, if I can say that.
I know how you feel. I have the same problem haha
Lizzie
 
Nov 11, 2022
32
40
18
#46
In all things, refer back to God's word.

1 Peter 3: 3-4 "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight."
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,297
4,342
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
#47
I know how you feel. I have the same problem haha
Lizzie
Hi Lizzie and Saved by Him,

I appreciate your interest in this subject. I'm not a strict person who cares how others dress. It's just a joy to know there are sisters who love the Lord. I listened to this message from a Baptist pastor a while back. I think you might like to hear it. He goes into lots of Bible verses on the topic.
Feel free to let me know if you have any questions. I might not have the answers but may be able to find it in the Word.
Modesty and Clothing in the Bible

Have a great day.
☕🙂 👍
 
Nov 11, 2022
32
40
18
#48
Hi Lizzie and Saved by Him,

I appreciate your interest in this subject. I'm not a strict person who cares how others dress. It's just a joy to know there are sisters who love the Lord. I listened to this message from a Baptist pastor a while back. I think you might like to hear it. He goes into lots of Bible verses on the topic.
Feel free to let me know if you have any questions. I might not have the answers but may be able to find it in the Word.
Modesty and Clothing in the Bible

Have a great day.
☕🙂 👍
Thank you very much for this message. In all things we must defer to God's word and His will. Our beauty comes from the radiance of the Holy Spirit which overwhelms as we grow closer in our relationship with Him.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,235
2,529
113
#49
Young women (teens) love the seemingly positive attention that wearing skimpy clothing brings.

Young women are being bombarded with all sorts of body image insults and insufficiency claims. They are desperate for affirmation that they appear lovely and lovable. Everything out there in today's media tells women what the "normal" woman should look like. Then we have the social media influencers and tic toc starlets and models all supposedly telling us indirectly or directly what pretty looks like.

Then there's the parents (especially dads) who don't want their daughters to grow up. Because grown-ups have had their heart broken severely many times...and don't want that for their daughters.

Dads see their daughters as people and not as an accessory that makes the room of a house or some guy look better.

And that's where the conflict comes from.
When parents are restrictive with clothing choices they ARE saying that they love their kids. They love WHO they are and not just what they do or look like.
All of this is going to be in conflict with a young girl's need for positive affirmation by others outside of her family that she is worthy. (A very difficult lesson for parents to teach teenagers without creating a self absorbed monster)


Clothing choices are a symptom of the problem...not the modesty in and of itself. Modesty is subjective and not something that can really be codified.

Some of the pictures here in this thread were once thought scandalous wear that only prostitutes should wear...and in some places in the world today. And in other places those pictures demonstrate overly covering a woman and make suggestions that they indeed are nuns or something.

So I can't really say what is modest and what is not. I simply recognize the battle and listen to parents and teens who all complain about clothing choices.
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,297
4,342
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
#50
Thank you very much for this message. In all things we must defer to God's word and His will. Our beauty comes from the radiance of the Holy Spirit which overwhelms as we grow closer in our relationship with Him.
You are very welcome, Saved by Him.
I couldn't put it better myself.
That's the kind of beauty that is more than skin deep.
 
Jan 21, 2023
7
2
3
17
#51
I'm a teenager myself so I relate to your question completely. I used to struggle with modest dressing a lot. I was never one to wear revealing clothes or things that showed off my body too much. Just sweatpants and tank tops was my go to, and sometimes is now. But at one point I started to realize that I was wearing certain things because they would make certain parts of my body look good. When choosing clothes to wear, you shouldn't ask whether this type or that type of clothing is allowed, but instead you should ask yourself, "How are these clothes making me feel? What are my motivations for wearing them?" If you wear a tank top and decide that you're wearing it because it's very hot on that particular day, I don't see why you shouldn't. As long as your motivations are to please God, then I think that you're on the right path. Including in that list though is that your first thought shouldn't be, "Will this tempt someone?" If you've dressed in a certain way and know that it will please God, then in the same hand it shouldn't tempt someone. The sad reality is that young women are objectified and sexually assaulted regardless of what they wear at times. Some men are also tempted by girls who wear the baggiest of clothes! So make sure that your foremost priority of the clothing you pick is to please God and represent Him through your clothing, and essentially your whole being. God bless and lots of love to you!
This is so true! I couldn't have said it better myself. Personally, I like to wear stuff I feel comfortable in and I love the way the sun feels on my skin. That being said I do like to keep my skirts short especially if it's hot or muggy outside. About the only thing I really have to worry about is bugs or guys trying to look up my skirt when I sit or I'm in the escalator. It's one thing to get a look if anything shows and it's another thing to stare.
 
H

HopeinHim4ever

Guest
#52
This is so true! I couldn't have said it better myself. Personally, I like to wear stuff I feel comfortable in and I love the way the sun feels on my skin. That being said I do like to keep my skirts short especially if it's hot or muggy outside. About the only thing I really have to worry about is bugs or guys trying to look up my skirt when I sit or I'm in the escalator. It's one thing to get a look if anything shows and it's another thing to stare.
I understand wanting to be comfortable, I do too. And sunshine is great. But if you are a Christian girl, you do have a responsibility to dress in a way as to try not to cause a man to stumble. Don't feel judged by this, but take it as a big sister giving some advice. I remember what it was like to be your age cuz it wasn't too long ago.;) It is very natural to want to appear attractive to a guy, and to a degree it's okay. But there are boundaries.
 

MessengerofTruth

Well-known member
Dec 21, 2022
688
434
63
#53
I would like to encourage any woman that calls herself a Christian to ask the LORD to reveal to her His standard of modesty and take his Word seriously. He is soon going to judge this world and every thought, word, and deed will be laid bare before Him.

This should bring fear to everyone that has a hope of salvation. We are called to be Blameless.

I would encourage all to keep that day in view as you examine your choice of clothing and behavior.

I hope that we can be an encouragement to each other to be the true witnesses we are called to be.

May the LORD give us much grace to be salt and lights in this world and have courage to stand in this evil day.
 

MessengerofTruth

Well-known member
Dec 21, 2022
688
434
63
#55
Girls should NEVER be blamed for a man touching them inappropriately no matter what they were wearing. Touching a female is a decision made entirely by the guy who bears 100 percent of the responsibility.
This is true, as that very thing has happened to me.

But with the lawlessness that is abounding, there will be more incidents of violation.

A man is very visual in the way he sees a woman, GOD wired him that way. I have my husband and 2 adult sons that express to me how hard it is to endure the way many women dress these days. One son seeks to be very upright toward the LORD and has expressed how when he sees a girl dressed skimpy, he feels that she is selling herself short and seeking attention that causes him to not respect her as a woman but more as an object.

There is even scientific study on men when they see porn the place in a man's brain that lights up is the same place that lights up for an ordinary object, but not the same when he sees a picture of a clothed woman.

I believe that we as women have a responsibility toward men not to lay a stumbling block before them. GOD will judge us for any sin that our influence has caused. Scary...
 
#56
In iran they make women cover themselves from head to foot because women are seen as seductresses that will "corrupt" innocent men. Women are made the villians. It is up to men to learn to behave in a civil manner and to respect women period.
 

MessengerofTruth

Well-known member
Dec 21, 2022
688
434
63
#57
In iran they make women cover themselves from head to foot because women are seen as seductresses that will "corrupt" innocent men. Women are made the villians. It is up to men to learn to behave in a civil manner and to respect women period.
I understand what you mean. I am only trying to speak to ladies.
I have actually had a number of times been in a store and come across a Muslim and the look of shock that they express is priceless when they see me. I am dressed modestly and do not try to keep up with the trends but try to look put together and I also wear a head covering, so I think I break the mold of what they expect every American woman looks like. I was even complimented by a Muslim, calling me a righteous woman. I do not share that to be self-righteous but to say that when we submit ourselves to the LORD we bring glory to Him and His gospel. I am only trying to encourage women to live to stand in the judgement blameless.
 
#58
Of course parents should teach their children to dress in a self respectful manner. I agree with that totally. But girls should not be saddled with the notion that they are "guilty" in any way whatsoever if they are sexually assualted. Women in full winter clothing have been raped and murdered. If you make the way girls dress a factor in judging a mans actions you are making the victim (girls) share part of the guilt when a man decides to commit sexual assault. And there are many different views on what is "appropriate" or "inappropriate". In Africa there are native people who wear little clothing and rape is almost non existent because the culture teaches respect.
 

MessengerofTruth

Well-known member
Dec 21, 2022
688
434
63
#59
Of course parents should teach their children to dress in a self respectful manner. I agree with that totally. But girls should not be saddled with the notion that they are "guilty" in any way whatsoever if they are sexually assualted. Women in full winter clothing have been raped and murdered. If you make the way girls dress a factor in judging a mans actions you are making the victim (girls) share part of the guilt when a man decides to commit sexual assault. And there are many different views on what is "appropriate" or "inappropriate". In Africa there are native people who wear little clothing and rape is almost non existent because the culture teaches respect.
I do not seek to blame a woman for a man's assault. I am only trying to encourage and exhort Christian women to consider what is the righteous thing to do.
 
May 6, 2022
5
5
3
#60
I recommend searching up Korean/Japanese fashion! Their fashion is usually modest, modern, and also unique! 🧸♡