Funny English phrases

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I am a bit hesitant to share this because George Carlin's humor was borderline, at best, and even while on national TV.

With the exception of his "riot act" comment, his other examples are clean.

He does address some everyday expressions which do not make much sense, so, if you are not easily offended, then you might find some humor in this.

 
"I'll circle back to you on this"
Why? Are you a white house Democrat spokeswoman (Jen Psaki)?
Why do you want to 360 on me? For what reason? I don't want to see you dance.
 
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I am a bit hesitant to share this because George Carlin's humor was borderline, at best, and even while on national TV.

With the exception of his "riot act" comment, his other examples are clean.

He does address some everyday expressions which do not make much sense, so, if you are not easily offended, then you might find some humor in this.

Somebody already did "in your own words."

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Keep your shirt on, I'm a happy camper, who's had it up to my eyeballs and stuffed to the gills. So don't have a hissy fit and jump from the frying pan into the fire. Come out of the closet and get real😎!
 
I agree. No reason that water can't be repurposed.

:ROFL: I mean sure but what kind of expression is this and where did it come from?
Who throws the baby with the bath water? This is worse than abortion.
 
:ROFL: I mean sure but what kind of expression is this and where did it come from?
Who throws the baby with the bath water? This is worse than abortion.
I don't know where it comes from, most likely from a large family. But the message is easily discernable. The water having become useless doesn't render the baby useless. When a little mold forms on a wheel of cheese, one should just cut of the mold and not throw out the whole wheel.
Biblically, Jesus said if your eye offends, cut out the eye, and enter eternity as a cyclops.
 
I don't know where it comes from, most likely from a large family. But the message is easily discernable. The water having become useless doesn't render the baby useless. When a little mold forms on a wheel of cheese, one should just cut of the mold and not throw out the whole wheel.
Biblically, Jesus said if your eye offends, cut out the eye, and enter eternity as a cyclops.

I get it :D ... it's just the baby part that bothers me. Why a baby? Why not a soap or some other object? Why a baby? That seems kinda extreme.
 
I get it :D ... it's just the baby part that bothers me. Why a baby? Why not a soap or some other object? Why a baby? That seems kinda extreme.
The hyperbole is designed to do exactly as it has with you. Water has great value in that it supports life. But a person has intrinsically greater value. A baby, in a helpless estate and unable to affect the outcome, merely serves to intensify emotion. I imagine for doglovers a puppy would suffice.
 
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No use crying over spilt milk

Why? If you spill some milk, wont the cat lick it up?
 
“Don’t let the door hit you on the way out“

Why does the door have to hit you anyway?
In fact most doors now and throughout history don’t have a self-swinging closing mechanism to hit you.
Most doors stay open when you open them.
What about rotating doors?
Also what about sliding doors in the supermarket or elsewhere?
They don’t hit you from behind.

This only makes sense in the rare case where the door has a self-swinging mechanism to close after it’s opened.
Even then, it’s very rare to hit you because they have sensors.
 
"Explain it like I'm five."

Five is such a low bar. Could you at least try for a 9-year-old comprehension level?


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Most newspapers are written on a sixth grade reading level.
At least ostensibly, but what sixth grader reads a newspaper?

Online articles probably shoot for second grade level.

On the other hand my phone's speech to text seems to be operating on a liberal kindergarten level. I used "ostensibly" intentionally to counterpoint the reading levels discussed, and my phone typed out "offensively." o_O
 
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"I'll take a rain check"

What is a rain check anyway? A wet check written when it's raining?
 
"Let the cat out of the bag"
"Beating a dead horse"

This second one is very odd.
 
"I heard it from the horse's mouth"

? Umm the horse doesn't speak English. Hello?