Would you date or marry a separated or divorced person?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Why can't you accept that God is the Father who provided the wisdom? And that there is a wisdom of man, and a wisdom of God?
Solomon's words are scripture...God breathed...out of God's mouth. Can his mother or father say the same of their words? So what is written couldn't have come from them.
why cant you accept that God would use a woman to impart wisdom?

weird.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
womens wisdom is completely different from mens wisdom or rather, foolishness.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
20,052
6,870
113
62
why cant you accept that God would use a woman to impart wisdom?

weird.
I have no problem recognizing women for what they have done. But it's a poor practice to ascribe to people the works of God.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,165
1,795
113
...............
Not Separated no way, they are still married.

Divorced, maybe ....be careful though. You must date and get to know them at least a year or two....and date based on godly principles.

***If you are against divorce, what about if the marriage was abusive? Would you advise the person to stay? Divorce is like any other sin and can be forgiven.
If someone lives apart from a spouse, or even divorces to preserver their life and safety, I understand that, but I don't see how it is not adulterous to remarry based on Biblical teaching.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,165
1,795
113
Princess Grace or Grace Kelly married into royalty but found it very hard to adjust to royal life. I think most non royals who marry into a royal family would find that wealth and lifestyle completely overwhelming.

she was not a divorcee though, however, I have heard that at the time, it was very importnat that she was a virgin, however, she was a Hollywood star and had had several lovers before she married, but people wanted to believe a complete fantasy that she was a pure white bride and never been touched before. I dont think so!
This was before my time, but if you don't having any specific information like this, you shouldn't be besmirching someone else' reputation. How would you like to be assumed.... and called... a whore?
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,686
9,620
113
That isn't evidence for what you asserted.
You have already been advised about the futility of trying to argue with lanolin. Logic and proof don't even factor into what she says. How long are you going to keep beating your head against this brick wall?

I mean... You can bang your head all you want, no skin off my nose. But we keep telling you it will profit nothing.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
I have no problem recognizing women for what they have done. But it's a poor practice to ascribe to people the works of God.
Bathesheba was just the mouthpiece as was Mary the vessel for Jesus to be born, but some people cant help but idolise women, eg men who like looking at naked women, or catholics venerating Mary.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
That isn't evidence for what you asserted.
its just reasoning, surely you can think or reason for yourself.

Do you ever work out a maths problem or you just say Oh the answers come from God.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
This was before my time, but if you don't having any specific information like this, you shouldn't be besmirching someone else' reputation. How would you like to be assumed.... and called... a whore?
you called her that, I didnt
A woman who has lovers is loved, it doesnt mean shes a whore. Thats YOUR interpretation
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
20,052
6,870
113
62
Bathesheba was just the mouthpiece as was Mary the vessel for Jesus to be born, but some people cant help but idolise women, eg men who like looking at naked women, or catholics venerating Mary.
I have absolutely no idea what that means. At any rate, grace and peace.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
27,686
9,620
113
its just reasoning, surely you can think or reason for yourself.

Do you ever work out a maths problem or you just say Oh the answers come from God.
Even in math, especially in math, you have to show your work, how you reached your answer.

Yeah, yeah, I know, this post directly contradicts what I said about the futility of arguing with lanolin. But that answer was so easy I couldn't pass it up.
 

brighthouse98

Senior Member
Apr 16, 2015
672
339
63
71
Sister Presidente One of the most important scriptures on any sin! (Romans 3:25 and 1 Peter1:9) And many more! Jesus looks at all of us believers in this light sis (Plip 4:7-9) verse 9!!! When I come before the Lord and an angel of the Lord asks me how should Jesus judge you?? My reply will be this very scripture!!

If Jesus does not judge us by this scripture who among us could ever enter heaven?? Therefore, I look at all believers in this very same light! Every one of us has flaws or have made mistakes in some way I sure do not judge!!

If others wish to that is on them but LOVE judges only self not others. I am so thankful to Jesus whose love surpasses our stupid mistakes in life!! Now remember this pertains to believers!!! I could not date an unbeliever!!! For as God's Word says!!(2 Cor 6:14!!) Blessing sis!!
 

Mosie

Active member
May 30, 2022
120
55
28
If someone lives apart from a spouse, or even divorces to preserver their life and safety, I understand that, but I don't see how it is not adulterous to remarry based on Biblical teaching.
I struggled with the same thing myself, I didn't believe in divorce. I was in an abusive marriage, I sought the counsel of many different pastors on the subject. There's a verse in the old testament that says if the man 'abandons' his marriage, the wife is free. Abusive is very much a form of abandonment.
Would you advise a wife to stay in an abusive marriage then?
Anyways, not like it applys much to me, since I was divorced out of an abusive marriage I've chosen to remain single. Any thoughts?

I guess you have to be in the situation.
 

brighthouse98

Senior Member
Apr 16, 2015
672
339
63
71
INDEED Sister Mosie!! WORDS MATTER!!! As well as action! My mom was treated like Edith Bunker for many years, finally at age 17 I took a chair to my earthy dad and told him he will never hit either of us again, or if he did, he would find himself in great pain!! A Week later he died! At age 48 and my mom and I were set free.

NO woman should EVER be HIT by either terrible words thrown to them or hit physically. The point is to me a woman has every right to make her own decisions! To look out for herself. If you decide to date again, I know you will make sure your man understands your rights! I myself will be going on 71 years of age who never married, close once!! Loll I love women!!!

I always wondered how in the world with so many beautiful women how a man could ever pick one to live the rest of his life with!! LOL The vow of marriage is so sacred to me, I just never could do it. For those who are married good for you, treat that wife as special as you would treat yourself!
 

Mosie

Active member
May 30, 2022
120
55
28
INDEED Sister Mosie!! WORDS MATTER!!! As well as action! My mom was treated like Edith Bunker for many years, finally at age 17 I took a chair to my earthy dad and told him he will never hit either of us again, or if he did, he would find himself in great pain!! A Week later he died! At age 48 and my mom and I were set free.

NO woman should EVER be HIT by either terrible words thrown to them or hit physically. The point is to me a woman has every right to make her own decisions! To look out for herself. If you decide to date again, I know you will make sure your man understands your rights! I myself will be going on 71 years of age who never married, close once!! Loll I love women!!!

I always wondered how in the world with so many beautiful women how a man could ever pick one to live the rest of his life with!! LOL The vow of marriage is so sacred to me, I just never could do it. For those who are married good for you, treat that wife as special as you would treat yourself!
............
Thank you Brighthouse for your kind response....Those are wise words you wrote!
 

I_am_Canadian

Senior Member
Dec 8, 2014
2,465
834
113
Oh believe me, I've been here 14 years and I have rhinoceros skin by now -- if you could look over all the threads I've written in the past, you'd see how I got it.

You state that this is the "singles" forum and not the "divorced and remarried forum," but a good number of the regulars here have actually been engaged or married before, are divorced, separated, or were widowed/abandoned.

It just seems that as a married person who wants to post regularly in Singles (which is fine,) you would want to learn more about the demographics of your audience.
Well put, but you could have added that it's a good idea for young single people to seek wisdom and guidance from people who have been married or still are married you can learn alot from others peoples failures just as much as you can learn from their success.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Here we come across double standards again.

I think most women that I know do not stay in marriage where they are abused, if they value their life, they get out. Wives that are battered and bruised end up in hospital or the womens refuge.

They will not dare to return back to the place where their husband hits them.

Many of these womens refuges are anonymous so their husbands cant find them and harm them or kill them. Restraining orders arent always effective.

What you can do...donate to a womans refuge..,they need things like toiletries (feminine hygiene products) and books for children. Often they have to sneak out in the middle of the night with the clothes on their backs if they cannot change the locks on the house.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Its only after a lot of healing been done that these women could ever trust another man
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,165
1,795
113
Well put, but you could have added that it's a good idea for young single people to seek wisdom and guidance from people who have been married or still are married you can learn alot from others peoples failures just as much as you can learn from their success.
I suppose one can learn from failures of others, but I would still prefer to get marriage advice from someone with a successful track record.

Also, the idea that a divorced person who doesn't have any biblical grounds for remarriage not doing so is a good topic of conversation for a group of divorced people.