Pet or Potential Spouse?

[MsMediator]

If you had to pick one, would you choose your pet whom you have raised and grown to love or a potential spouse who you like but he/she doesn't like pets and doesn't want one and asks you to find a new home for the pet? Also, he/she doesn't have a valid reason (such as being very allergic) other than pets are a nuisance, unnecessarily responsibility, dirty/unclean, fur everywhere, hates cats, etc.

For me, I would definitely choose the pet. I read a post elsewhere where someone put all sorts of restrictions on the woman's cat, and also declared no more cats after the current one. I found this to be extreme. No quite the same level, but this is similar to disagreement on whether to have children.

 

[Lynx]

If you had to pick one, would you choose your pet whom you have raised and grown to love or a potential spouse who you like but he/she doesn't like pets and doesn't want one and asks you to find a new home for the pet? Also, he/she doesn't have a valid reason (such as being very allergic) other than pets are a nuisance, unnecessarily responsibility, dirty/unclean, fur everywhere, hates cats, etc.

For me, I would definitely choose the pet. I read a post elsewhere where someone put all sorts of restrictions on the woman's cat, and also declared no more cats after the current one. I found this to be extreme. No quite the same level, but this is similar to disagreement on whether to have children.

To me pets are for outdoors. I've driven the church bus for years and picked up way too many kids who smelled like dog. And good luck making sure your cat will stay off the table while you're gone.

So if a potential spouse made me choose between her and my OUTDOOR pet, I'd need a pretty doggone (pun intended) reason for it.

 

[seekingthemindofChrist]

To me pets are for outdoors. I've driven the church bus for years and picked up way too many kids who smelled like dog.

I know that "dogs" is being used figuratively here, but your comment reminds me of this:

Revelation 22:15

"For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie."

And good luck making sure your cat will stay off the table while you're gone.

You would know...

 

[Lynx]

Nope, that was literal. They literally smelled like the dogs who stayed in the house with them. Everybody else could smell it, but I doubt they themselves knew that they smelled like dogs. After a while your nose gets used to it. But everybody else could tell that dogs stayed in their house and nobody ever gave the dogs a bath.

 

[Tall_Timbers]

I would not be compatible with a woman that had/wanted cats. That would be a red line for me. Dogs would be fine.

 

[seekingthemindofChrist]

Nope, that was literal. They literally smelled like the dogs who stayed in the house with them. Everybody else could smell it, but I doubt they themselves knew that they smelled like dogs. After a while your nose gets used to it. But everybody else could tell that dogs stayed in their house and nobody ever gave the dogs a bath.

I meant figuratively in the verse that followed.

I knew that you were speaking literally.

Sorry for the confusion.

 

[MsMediator]

I would not be compatible with a woman that had/wanted cats. That would be a red line for me. Dogs would be fine.

Curious, why do you say that? Have you had a cat? Are you transferring a generic cat's personality to the woman? For me, if a man doesn't like cats that would be a red flag. It would be one thing if he never had a cat, but if he doesn't attempt to try that would also be a red flag.

 

[MsMediator]

Everyone can of course have their own pet preferences. My personal experience is that I was scared of dogs until I had them (have had large dogs), and same with cats. However there is a certain group of people who have cat derangement syndrome which goes beyond indifference and simple dislike, which I have never quite understood. I can never live with someone like that as I'll worry he will have a dark side.

 

[Tall_Timbers]

Curious, why do you say that? Have you had a cat? Are you transferring a generic cat's personality to the woman? For me, if a man doesn't like cats that would be a red flag. It would be one thing if he never had a cat, but if he doesn't attempt to try that would also be a red flag.

No, I would never have a cat. Don't care for them. It's simply that a woman that wants cats would not be compatible with me because I would not have a cat in my home. If I had a barn, a barn cat would be okay so long as it never stepped foot inside the house...

 

[MsMediator]

No, I would never have a cat. Don't care for them. It's simply that a woman that wants cats would not be compatible with me because I would not have a cat in my home. If I had a barn, a barn cat would be okay so long as it never stepped foot inside the house...

Curious, what is it about cats you dont like?

 

[MaryM]

If you had to pick one, would you choose your pet whom you have raised and grown to love or a potential spouse who you like but he/she doesn't like pets and doesn't want one and asks you to find a new home for the pet? Also, he/she doesn't have a valid reason (such as being very allergic) other than pets are a nuisance, unnecessarily responsibility, dirty/unclean, fur everywhere, hates cats, etc.

For me, I would definitely choose the pet. I read a post elsewhere where someone put all sorts of restrictions on the woman's cat, and also declared no more cats after the current one. I found this to be extreme. No quite the same level, but this is similar to disagreement on whether to have children.

My pet. That love is for life.

 

[Tall_Timbers]

Curious, what is it about cats you dont like?

Just don't like them. Period.

 

[NightTwister]

Dogs are so much more loyal, loving, and reliable.

 

[Subhumanoidal]

I, also, would not want a woman with a cat/cats. I'm no fan of cats. Also that a woman may refer to someone that simply doesn't care for cats as a "red flag" further cements my stance. This time, not because of the cat, but the mentality.

When I was younger we had numerous cats and I always hated having them.
Note I said hated Having them, not that I hated them, before that accusation gets put out there.

But also I am not an animal lover, like so many claim to be. If an animal dies in a movie I don't have a meltdown. I don't enjoy sitting and watching animal videos.
I do like animals, though. And wouldn't mind having a dog.
After we quit having cats we got a dog, and though it was bought for my sister she became my dog. She even slept in my bed with me.

As to whether or not I'd give up a pet for a spouse, hard to say. I've not owned a personal pet since I was 18. But, unintentionally, I've most often dated animal lovers, so it likely wouldn't be a problem.
Though I was glad my current gf, when choosing a new pet, chose a dog, not a cat.

 

[GaryA]

Are you transferring a generic cat's personality to the woman?

Do you have reason to believe that a valid comparison may be made?

Everyone can of course have their own pet preferences.

For me, if a man doesn't like cats that would be a red flag.

If a man can have personal pet preferences, why is it necessarily a 'red flag' if he does not particularly care for cats?

 

[GaryA]

Any 'red flag' in the sense of rendering the man and woman "incompatible" where their pet preferences are concerned - yes, I can see that. But, if you mean 'red flag' in the sense of "something must be wrong with him/her if they are like that", that is something else...

 

[ByTheGraceOfGod]

Dogs are so much more loyal, loving, and reliable.

That is not true of all cats and all dogs. All my cats have been extremely loyal, loving, and reliable.

 

[ByTheGraceOfGod]

I have had 4 different breeds of Cat and 2 mixed-breed cats; people would constantly tell me things they think are true of all cats and as soon as I calmly tell them what they are saying is not true of any of any the cats I've had, they get very angry. I have had people tell me they dislike cats and then they get a dog with several big personality traits similar to the cats I have/dad. Many people who have never owned cats and don't know much about cats as a whole tend to like to tell cat owners what all cats do and don't do.

 

[Gojira]

If you had to pick one, would you choose your pet whom you have raised and grown to love or a potential spouse who you like but he/she doesn't like pets and doesn't want one and asks you to find a new home for the pet? Also, he/she doesn't have a valid reason (such as being very allergic) other than pets are a nuisance, unnecessarily responsibility, dirty/unclean, fur everywhere, hates cats, etc.

For me, I would definitely choose the pet. I read a post elsewhere where someone put all sorts of restrictions on the woman's cat, and also declared no more cats after the current one. I found this to be extreme. No quite the same level, but this is similar to disagreement on whether to have children.

Wow, MsMediator... seriously?????

Nooo.... I don't think so LOL. I love dogs, but {a woman who is marryable} > {a dog}.

 

[Gojira]

I have had 4 different breeds of Cat and 2 mixed-breed cats; people would constantly tell me things they think are true of all cats and as soon as I calmly tell them what they are saying is not true of any of any the cats I've had, they get very angry. I have had people tell me they dislike cats and then they get a dog with several big personality traits similar to the cats I have/dad. Many people who have never owned cats and don't know much about cats as a whole tend to like to tell cat owners what all cats do and don't do.

I've lived with three, I was right every time.

NO MORE CATS IN MY HOUSE.