Hello All! My name is Daniel. I used to call myself "Dan" but as part of my growth in TRULY becoming a child of Christ, I am trying to separate myself from the former self. I was Catholic since birth, with varying degrees of devotion over the years. I have struggled all my life over issues of inadequacy, depression, and anxiety. I rebelled against God, or what Catholicism said God was. Long and short, I was well meaning and somewhat "innocent" through my teens, lost hope in my early 20's, an awful person through mid 30's, suffering and learning in late 30's, awakening on my 40'th birthday, Repentant at 42. Through constant daily prayer and reading (Bible, Tozer, Pink, Dr. Bill Creasy, C.S Lewis etc.) I have maintained constant vigilance, out of fear of returning to my old ways. I quit every vice you can imagine, save for caffeine and nicotine. I've lost my quickness to anger, lust, and impatience and anything the Holy Spirit tells me to get rid of as I continue this journey. I have occasional battles of faith, but unlike the past, I suffer through it, praying to be given more faith and guidance. I am a "Lone Wolf" Christian presently as I am extremely introverted and have a short attention span. I am keeping an open mind however. I've been to a reformed Baptist prayer group, a Calvary church, and plan on visiting a Baptist service this Sunday. I feel I am closest to God when I walk in the woods for hours asking for forgiveness and thanking Him for my salvation. I am married with kids, to a non-believer. I have a son out of wedlock, she has been divorced. I know this is a bad situation, and not in line with scripture, but I have no recourse and only choose to pray and ask forgiveness. Right now I am trying to come to true terms with my repentance over past sins. I ask for forgiveness for them, but I don't feel I am at the point where I would confess these sins to others if pressed. Can I truly be repentant if I am not ready to lose everything I have, by confessing these sins? Would I lie to hide my past sins? It's all hypothetical but I want to cure my soul to the cure, so these questions have to be asked. I will post intermittently to see if I can gain insight on my struggles. I believe in the Holy Spirit above all else to lead me to true repentance in the meantime. Bless you all. Merry Christmas!
Thanks for sharing your testimony.
I was also raised Catholic.
Then a Baptist had the love to show me the following message that I just passed forward to my doctor. I hope it's a blessing to you.