Questions That Need Answers

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Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#1
Aug 13, 2014
27,359
9,373
113
#1
"I've got better questions
Than I have answers..."
- Todd Agnew

I have some questions that need answering.

Why do we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway? If I PARK on a PARKway I'll get a traffic ticket. It's called a PARKway so I should be able to PARK there. And there's nowhere to drive to on a DRIVEway.

Why does the word "efficient" need two of the letter f to do the job of one? That seems hypocritical. You need to BE the change you want to see, efishent.

Why is there a song about Jimmy cracking corn? The song itself says we don't care. Why did we bother making a song about something we don't care about? If I don't care about something I'll just go off and put my attention in something I do care about, not write songs about the things I don't care about.

Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies? Do we need to change cooking methods or names here? Should we start baking bacon? Or should we call sweet treats bakies and long salty strips cookon?


Do you have any answers? Do you have any questions like these that have been bugging you?
 
Susanna

Susanna

Well-known member
#2
Apr 14, 2023
1,611
525
113
48
Galveston and Houston
#2
Suuure, when I was (much) younger I overheard a conversation outside of the church where someone said to another person that a third person, whom they both evidently knew, had been cooking the books.

I could vividly visualize all those books boiling in the water and this person tasting them.

Years (many) later I finally found out what the expression really meant.😂
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#3
Aug 13, 2014
27,359
9,373
113
#3
Susanna said:
Suuure, when I was (much) younger I overheard a conversation outside of the church where someone said to another person that a third person, whom they both evidently knew, had been cooking the books.

I could vividly visualize all those books boiling in the water and this person tasting them.

Years (many) later I finally found out what the expression really meant.😂
Click to expand...
The third person, the book chef, probably left town under a cloud. That would definitely dampen his spirits. He'd be all wet.
 
icequeen

icequeen

Active member
#4
Nov 8, 2019
211
134
43
#4
You cook bacon on a cooker and bake cookies in an oven. That one was easy!
Efficient comes from Latin, but where as English has preserved the double f, Spanish and Portuguese haven't. Does that mean they are more efficient?
As for drive- and parkway. I have no clue. And the song is also not familiar.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#5
Aug 13, 2014
27,359
9,373
113
#5
icequeen said:
You cook bacon on a cooker and bake cookies in an oven. That one was easy!
Click to expand...
Exactly. So we should start calling it cookon and bakies instead of bacon and cookies.

Or we should start baking bacon and cooking cookies. But all the bacon lovers I know turn a rather unhealthy shade of white when I talk about baking bacon. Must be all that cholesterol clogging their arteries...
 
icequeen

icequeen

Active member
#6
Nov 8, 2019
211
134
43
#6
Baking bacon works well. I bake them in my airfryer. :)

Cookies could perhaps be cooked in a Dutch oven?
 
GRACE_ambassador

GRACE_ambassador

Well-known member
#7
Feb 22, 2021
3,215
1,614
113
Midwest
#7
Lynx said:
all the bacon lovers I know turn a rather unhealthy shade of white when I talk about baking bacon. Must be all that cholesterol clogging their arteries...
Click to expand...
Could be something to do with king David's words spoken many moons ago?:

"Their heart is as fat as grease..." (Psalm 119:70), eh? ;)​
 
Mem

Mem

Senior Member
#8
Sep 23, 2014
7,159
2,174
113
#8
Why do children get upset when we try to give them a nap? Do they totally miss the generosity of the gesture?
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#9
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
#9
Susanna said:
Suuure, when I was (much) younger I overheard a conversation outside of the church where someone said to another person that a third person, whom they both evidently knew, had been cooking the books.

I could vividly visualize all those books boiling in the water and this person tasting them.

Years (many) later I finally found out what the expression really meant.😂
Click to expand...

Oh boy.

Here's my PG-13 rated version of this story.

When I was in Lutheran school, single moms were unfairly looked down upon (it's one of the things I grew to hate about conservative church culture.)

I have no idea what the lady's actual personal life was like, but I remember the good church ladies saying that the single mother of one of my classmates "had a revolving door for men."

My little grade-school self was wondering what on earth would be wrong with this, because I thought revolving doors were awesome! Like a walking merry-go-round -- and how much fun would it be to have one built in to the side of your own house!

Now, I was a little puzzled as to one would keep leaves out or a strong rain storm from flooding the house as you went in and out, but... yeah.

To me it sounded like the coolest thing ever! :LOL:

And, I didn't understand why it had to be just for men. :mad:
 
seoulsearch

seoulsearch

OutWrite Trouble
#10
May 23, 2009
16,492
5,428
113
#10
Questions Seoulsearch Really Really Needs Answered:

1. If people came over from Britain to establish the USA, how did Americans lose those beautiful accents?! :cry:

2. Who came up with the idea that bagels and donuts have holes, and why do they sell donut holes but not bagel holes? :geek:

3. If the doctors say I have to eat rabbit food for the rest of my life, why didn't God just make me a rabbit? :unsure:
 
icequeen

icequeen

Active member
#11
Nov 8, 2019
211
134
43
#11
seoulsearch said:
Questions Seoulsearch Really Really Needs Answered:

1. If people came over from Britain to establish the USA, how did Americans lose those beautiful accents?! :cry:

2. Who came up with the idea that bagels and donuts have holes, and why do they sell donut holes but not bagel holes? :geek:

3. If the doctors say I have to eat rabbit food for the rest of my life, why didn't God just make me a rabbit? :unsure:
Click to expand...
Bagel-holes=rolls????
And it would be so cool being a rabbit, bouncing around. As for the grass eating I would give it a pass, but I wonder how even grass must be awesome in Heaven. As for Brits... Remember that very few spoke Oxford English. There are multiple accents on the British Isles, and the American accent was heavily influenced by the Irish that came during the 19th century, hence the American "r-s", that are close to the Irish.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#12
Aug 13, 2014
27,359
9,373
113
#12
seoulsearch said:
Questions Seoulsearch Really Really Needs Answered:

1. If people came over from Britain to establish the USA, how did Americans lose those beautiful accents?! :cry:

2. Who came up with the idea that bagels and donuts have holes, and why do they sell donut holes but not bagel holes? :geek:

3. If the doctors say I have to eat rabbit food for the rest of my life, why didn't God just make me a rabbit? :unsure:
Click to expand...
I think they overcooked the bagel holes. Now they call them pretzel bites. Or maybe they are croutons.
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#13
Aug 13, 2014
27,359
9,373
113
#13
seoulsearch said:
Now, I was a little puzzled as to one would keep leaves out or a strong rain storm from flooding the house as you went in and out, but... yeah.
Click to expand...
Well... Yeah, that kind of revolving door DOES tend to cause a storm...
 
Susanna

Susanna

Well-known member
#14
Apr 14, 2023
1,611
525
113
48
Galveston and Houston
#14
seoulsearch said:
Oh boy.

Here's my PG-13 rated version of this story.

When I was in Lutheran school, single moms were unfairly looked down upon (it's one of the things I grew to hate about conservative church culture.)

I have no idea what the lady's actual personal life was like, but I remember the good church ladies saying that the single mother of one of my classmates "had a revolving door for men."

My little grade-school self was wondering what on earth would be wrong with this, because I thought revolving doors were awesome! Like a walking merry-go-round -- and how much fun would it be to have one built in to the side of your own house!

Now, I was a little puzzled as to one would keep leaves out or a strong rain storm from flooding the house as you went in and out, but... yeah.

To me it sounded like the coolest thing ever! :LOL:

And, I didn't understand why it had to be just for men. :mad:
Click to expand...
Sounds like my sentiment lol.
 
Eli1

Eli1

Well-known member
#15
Apr 5, 2022
4,759
2,054
113
46
#15
I love idioms. :D

They're the best thing since sliced bread and you can do them cold turkey but sometimes you gotta hold your horses.

 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#16
Aug 13, 2014
27,359
9,373
113
#16
Also, why can you send cargo by sea, but a shipment goes overland? Isn't that supposed to be reversed?
 
G

gb9

Senior Member
#17
Jan 18, 2011
12,318
6,690
113
#17
Lynx said:
Also, why can you send cargo by sea, but a shipment goes overland? Isn't that supposed to be reversed?
Click to expand...
most people have some type of hotwater heater in their homes.

why do we need to heat hot water?? should it not be called a cold water heater??

or, if your cold water is actually not cold just cool, should it them be a cool water heater??

and if the water heater is cool, is the heat/ac unit a nerd??
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#18
Aug 13, 2014
27,359
9,373
113
#18
gb9 said:
most people have some type of hotwater heater in their homes.

why do we need to heat hot water?? should it not be called a cold water heater??

or, if your cold water is actually not cold just cool, should it them be a cool water heater??

and if the water heater is cool, is the heat/ac unit a nerd??
Click to expand...
Don't get me started on the AC. If you crank it up, the temperature goes down. If you turn it down the temperature goes up.
 
B

Burn1986

Active member
#19
Mar 4, 2024
918
212
43
#19
Why did King Saul never repent?
Why did Lazarus have to stay in the grave as long as he did?
 
Lynx

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
#20
Aug 13, 2014
27,359
9,373
113
#20
Burn1986 said:
Why did King Saul never repent?
Why did Lazarus have to stay in the grave as long as he did?
Click to expand...
1. Pride, apparently.

2. They have something about you wait three days after a person has died to make sure he's dead. (Same problem that gave us graveyard shift and dead ringers.) Waiting four days was official proof he was really dead.
 
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