New job

[seantspence]

You both have warmed my day




I can't imagine ever getting procedures. That's not to say that I don't care about my appearance. I have a natural approach to skin care. The years are creeping up on me, so I guess I'm just trying to look okay for my age instead of older than I am. I do take collagen peptides and hyaluronic acid everyday, plus vitamins. I do face exercises and gua sha everyday. I use organic coconut oil on my face and a natural oil mixture around my eyes and snail mucin on my neck. That'll have to do, 'cause I have no plans of getting any type of procedures. I'd rather go into hiding. The critters would still come visit me lol.




This is smashing to hear! It sounds like your health will benefit so much. I think it is brave of you to go through the procedure of getting off meds. I haven't personally been on meds, but I've heard that it's not an easy process. You are choosing to move forward in a better direction and are actually doing it. That's inspiring. All the things you've mentioned surely will result in you feeling better in mind and body. Having a healhy overall well being (spiritual, mental, physical) is a blessing. It's not good for us to be trapped. It's not good for us to be stagnant. I hope so much that the road ahead continues to bring positive changes.

I realize I bought collagen peptide protein powder a few weeks ago but I have since tried it. I kinda want to use the 4 different protein powders I got that day while I’m working out. I tried the pumpkin spice protein powder but I only used have the amount of the serving and it was gross!

 

[CarriePie]

I currently don’t do anything with my face other than apply a prescription shampoo to my head, face and ears. For 8 years I had skin issues on my face, scalp and ears. Almost like a psoriasis. I told an urgent care facility about it like three months ago and after eight ears of being super self conscious about my face, it all went away and my skin issues back to normal. It’s crazy. I never really had bags underneath my eyes until recently but I think it is cause of me staying up every night cause I was drinking 64 oz of coffee every day. Now that I don’t drink coffee, I realize that I just have insomnia. So today my therapist recommended I talk to my nurse practitioner about it so I don’t have insomnia anymore and my bags will go away just by having better sleep.

If it wasn’t for me leaving my old psychiatrist because they didn’t take my insurance anymore, I wouldn’t have the amazing nurse practitioner that I do now. And the fact that I don’t have schizo anything and I’m just bipolar which I may not even be that either, gives me a lot of hope. Having a diagnosis of being someone who believed they were schizophrenic cause a doctor diagnosed them that way did a number on me but now that that isn’t the case, I feel like I defeated a ton of people that I told and judged me for it, including my dad and his wife and their children. They all blamed the drugs and told me that it was my fault for not moving in with them when I was 14. My dad is the biggest hypocrite because he went through the same thing when he was my age except he did worse drugs and a lot more than I ever did and instead of stopping at 26, he continued into his 30’s, never having a job until he was around the age that I am now. I started working when i was 18 and I’ve been creating things my entire life. So he could just not speak cause I obviously am not like him and matured at a much earlier age, while he was living off of my rich grandpa and stealing money from his for the first half of my life. The only thing I’ve ever stolen was a pack of gum when I was 3 and a few digimon cards at a target when i was 13. My dad bought jackets worth 8k with my grandpas money. So if he is going to judge anyone, he has to look in a mirror or the Bible.

I have since forgave him but these are things that have come up over the years that I don’t forget.

Now we get to see his new kids go through the same thing. I wonder what he thinks about that but probably pointing fingers again from my guess, instead of doing a deep dive into himself.

I'm so glad you have your current nurse practitioner. It sounds like you were under such a dark heavy cloud for a long time and are finally breaking free to clearer days.


I can't say I have any experience with drugs. So, I can't possibly understand what you've been through. I have certainly been under a dark heavy cloud more than once in my life. It's not a healthy place to be. I used to write about it, that seemed therapeutic. Of course, drawing close to the Lord was the biggest help. Getting out into the great outdoors was another thing and being active another thing. Everyone's comfort is different. For me, being out with creation made such a difference.


It's unusual how there are so many people in the world who don't see their own faults. I know people like this too. Unfortunately, it always seems to be someone close to us. Life is stressful enough. I guess, at least, we are not trapped in that mentality and making others miserable.


I never had children and I really haven't even been around children very much in my life. I'd like to think if I had had children I would have tried my best to bring them up with the guidance of the Lord.

I realize I bought collagen peptide protein powder a few weeks ago but I have since tried it. I kinda want to use the 4 different protein powders I got that day while I’m working out. I tried the pumpkin spice protein powder but I only used have the amount of the serving and it was gross!

I know the collagen peptides I take don't taste very good lol. I call it my nasty drink. I was taking another brand that didn't have any taste. I wasn't noticing that it was doing anything. So, I've come to the conclusion that if collagen tastes bad, it must be good

 

[seantspence]

I'm so glad you have your current nurse practitioner. It sounds like you were under such a dark heavy cloud for a long time and are finally breaking free to clearer days.


I can't say I have any experience with drugs. So, I can't possibly understand what you've been through. I have certainly been under a dark heavy cloud more than once in my life. It's not a healthy place to be. I used to write about it, that seemed therapeutic. Of course, drawing close to the Lord was the biggest help. Getting out into the great outdoors was another thing and being active another thing. Everyone's comfort is different. For me, being out with creation made such a difference.


It's unusual how there are so many people in the world who don't see their own faults. I know people like this too. Unfortunately, it always seems to be someone close to us. Life is stressful enough. I guess, at least, we are not trapped in that mentality and making others miserable.


I never had children and I really haven't even been around children very much in my life. I'd like to think if I had had children I would have tried my best to bring them up with the guidance of the Lord.





I know the collagen peptides I take don't taste very good lol. I call it my nasty drink. I was taking another brand that didn't have any taste. I wasn't noticing that it was doing anything. So, I've come to the conclusion that if collagen tastes bad, it must be good

That makes sense about the collagen. I don’t think anything healthy is supposed to taste good, except for maybe berries.

I haven’t had kids yet but I did spend the last ten years with my little brother who was 7 when I moved in, so I got to play father figure even though I am his brother. Over the last couple years we have grown apart. He stopped wanting anything to do with Jesus/God and I dived deeper into my relationship with Jesus/God, more so than I ever did before.

I’d like to go outside more and enjoy nature. Now that I have this new job, I can work anywhere so I was thinking of working in the outside tables area at downtown Long Beach’s Starbucks. I wish the beach had wifi. May have to get a hotspot service so I can go literally anywhere and work.

I was in a dark cloud from 16-26 even though it seemed like a great time at the time. Then at 26 I accepted Jesus as my lord and savior and there were some great times but the last two years when I left a job two years ago cause I found out my supervisor was being sexually immoral, I couldn’t be under her supervision anymore. But I think the darkness really happened a year ago, when I went to an old atheist friends house and we watched 10 movies, most of them rated R and I made the decision to watch pornography when I got home cause I watched the movie Wolf of Wallstreet. After that I was hooked and kept trying to stop until about over a month ago, I installed the Covenant Eyes app on all of my devices and they surviel all of your screens and warn your accountability partner if you look at any nude images. So because I’m being watched 24/7 by the app, and I repented my sin the same day, God honored it and I’ve been free from it ever since.

So now I get to add recovering porn addict to the list. Even though I have a lot of times of weakness, God seems to continue to strengthen me and make progress every day. Been free since before September 11th. It’s funny cause whenever I’d go to church during that period, everyone acted like they were a Pharisee toward me. Now I realize why.

 

[seantspence]

I'm so glad you have your current nurse practitioner. It sounds like you were under such a dark heavy cloud for a long time and are finally breaking free to clearer days.


I can't say I have any experience with drugs. So, I can't possibly understand what you've been through. I have certainly been under a dark heavy cloud more than once in my life. It's not a healthy place to be. I used to write about it, that seemed therapeutic. Of course, drawing close to the Lord was the biggest help. Getting out into the great outdoors was another thing and being active another thing. Everyone's comfort is different. For me, being out with creation made such a difference.


It's unusual how there are so many people in the world who don't see their own faults. I know people like this too. Unfortunately, it always seems to be someone close to us. Life is stressful enough. I guess, at least, we are not trapped in that mentality and making others miserable.


I never had children and I really haven't even been around children very much in my life. I'd like to think if I had had children I would have tried my best to bring them up with the guidance of the Lord.





I know the collagen peptides I take don't taste very good lol. I call it my nasty drink. I was taking another brand that didn't have any taste. I wasn't noticing that it was doing anything. So, I've come to the conclusion that if collagen tastes bad, it must be good

I think the only reason i was accepted on this website was because I repented that sexual immorality sin, otherwise I would not be welcomed by the church.

 

[CarriePie]

I’d like to go outside more and enjoy nature. Now that I have this new job, I can work anywhere so I was thinking of working in the outside tables area at downtown Long Beach’s Starbucks. I wish the beach had wifi. May have to get a hotspot service so I can go literally anywhere and work.

Funny fact about me: I've never been to an ocean beach in my life

I was in a dark cloud from 16-26 even though it seemed like a great time at the time. Then at 26 I accepted Jesus as my lord and savior and there were some great times but the last two years when I left a job two years ago cause I found out my supervisor was being sexually immoral, I couldn’t be under her supervision anymore. But I think the darkness really happened a year ago, when I went to an old atheist friends house and we watched 10 movies, most of them rated R and I made the decision to watch pornography when I got home cause I watched the movie Wolf of Wallstreet. After that I was hooked and kept trying to stop until about over a month ago, I installed the Covenant Eyes app on all of my devices and they surviel all of your screens and warn your accountability partner if you look at any nude images. So because I’m being watched 24/7 by the app, and I repented my sin the same day, God honored it and I’ve been free from it ever since.

So now I get to add recovering porn addict to the list. Even though I have a lot of times of weakness, God seems to continue to strengthen me and make progress every day. Been free since before September 11th. It’s funny cause whenever I’d go to church during that period, everyone acted like they were a Pharisee toward me. Now I realize why.

It can be incredibly difficult to break free from addictions. There are a variety of addictions to tempt us all. Good for you for taking a stand against yours! All these things you are striving to improve after being stuck in your former life are the "Pain that alters."
Most of my dark days were due to life circumstances beyond my control (mostly family related). I feel like a mystery that's hidden away. Sometimes I feel like I'm a mystery even to myself. I wonder, what am I here for...what am I good at? I asked someone close to me what they thought I was good at. Their answer, "Cooking." That wasn't the answer I was looking for lol

I think the only reason i was accepted on this website was because I repented that sexual immorality sin, otherwise I would not be welcomed by the church.

Don't worry...according to some people here I got way more problems than you got (as far as viewpoints go).

 

[seantspence]

Funny fact about me: I've never been to an ocean beach in my life




It can be incredibly difficult to break free from addictions. There are a variety of addictions to tempt us all. Good for you for taking a stand against yours! All these things you are striving to improve after being stuck in your former life are the "Pain that alters."
Most of my dark days were due to life circumstances beyond my control (mostly family related). I feel like a mystery that's hidden away. Sometimes I feel like I'm a mystery even to myself. I wonder, what am I here for...what am I good at? I asked someone close to me what they thought I was good at. Their answer, "Cooking." That wasn't the answer I was looking for lol




Don't worry...according to some people here I got way more problems than you got (as far as viewpoints go).

I like the biblical creationism that you are into. I think it is way cool and puts a shoe in the mouth of everything else out there.

I’m still hesitant to go to any church cause I don’t know if they are going to accept me or still shun me but to me they are all pharisee’s except my pastor who continues to reach out to me every week.

I’m sure you are great at a lot of things. All Christians have ability to be the best of the best in their purpose. Your kindness to everyone on this website is a super power. I am not kind to my mother in real life sometimes. She comes up to me and asks the most obvious questions or disrupts me about things that are meaningless and just a waste of both of our time. Every second I’m alive I want to add value in the world or listen or read things that add value to me. Cause my mom doesn’t consume media that will make her more spiritually healthy, she comes to me just for me to talk to respond to her. If she read the Bible or listened to sermons or spent any time with God, she wouldn’t have to come to me all the time and I would get my boundaries respected, instead of constantly stepped over.

How have you never been to the ocean before???!! I grew up by the beach. The hospital I was born at was hoag hospital Newport BEACH. My grandmother and grandfather lived in Hawaii, so whenever I went there I went to the beach. My dad surfs every weekend almost still. I grew up going to the beach. The first place I lived at with a girlfriend when I was 20 was literally a block away from Huntington Beach pier.

Even though I grew up with the beach, ever since about 12 years ago, I’ve only been to the beach a few times. The beach is such a have to look a certain way place, otherwise everyone judges you there. It’s good to go there in the morning though before anyone goes there or right before sun set and set up a bon fire with s’mores or hot dogs.

 

[CarriePie]

I like the biblical creationism that you are into. I think it is way cool and puts a shoe in the mouth of everything else out there.

I’m still hesitant to go to any church cause I don’t know if they are going to accept me or still shun me but to me they are all pharisee’s except my pastor who continues to reach out to me every week.

I’m sure you are great at a lot of things. All Christians have ability to be the best of the best in their purpose. Your kindness to everyone on this website is a super power. I am not kind to my mother in real life sometimes. She comes up to me and asks the most obvious questions or disrupts me about things that are meaningless and just a waste of both of our time. Every second I’m alive I want to add value in the world or listen or read things that add value to me. Cause my mom doesn’t consume media that will make her more spiritually healthy, she comes to me just for me to talk to respond to her. If she read the Bible or listened to sermons or spent any time with God, she wouldn’t have to come to me all the time and I would get my boundaries respected, instead of constantly stepped over.

Biblical Creationism is a bit of passion to me. I haven't flown in over a year, but when/if I fly again I'll try to do a long layover in Dallas so I can go to the Institute for Creation Research. I had a chance to go to The Ark in Kentucky, but I felt the Lord was guiding me to not go (not because of The Ark, but the circumstances of the trip getting there).

You are very kind. You probably see me in a better light than I see myself. I certainly have my grumpy moments. I feel the Lord is giving me this season of my life to just be. That's really what I feel He was telling me after my dad's burial and I was outside pouring my heart out to the Lord. I feel He was telling me that right now it is enough for me to just be. I feel like I'm being altered. I feel that when I'm through with this season of just being, then the Lord will guide me to His will for my life. And I don't think it has anything to do with me being good at cooking lol

How have you never been to the ocean before???!! I grew up by the beach. The hospital I was born at was hoag hospital Newport BEACH. My grandmother and grandfather lived in Hawaii, so whenever I went there I went to the beach. My dad surfs every weekend almost still. I grew up going to the beach. The first place I lived at with a girlfriend when I was 20 was literally a block away from Huntington Beach pier.

Even though I grew up with the beach, ever since about 12 years ago, I’ve only been to the beach a few times. The beach is such a have to look a certain way place, otherwise everyone judges you there. It’s good to go there in the morning though before anyone goes there or right before sun set and set up a bon fire with s’mores or hot dogs.

I got quite the chuckle from your question of why I haven't been to the ocean. I live in a landlocked state. Up until 2017, besides Oklahoma, I had only been to Kansas and Missouri. In 2017, I flew for the first time. I went to Atlanta. On the way there, the plane flew along the Gulf...that's as close to a beach as I've been lol. I just never really had the opportunity to travel much in my life. I've mostly always been far away from beaches.

I do like bonfires, and s'mores and hotdogs along with it. I can imagine it's an exceptional experience to have a bonfire on the beach.

 

[seantspence]

Biblical Creationism is a bit of passion to me. I haven't flown in over a year, but when/if I fly again I'll try to do a long layover in Dallas so I can go to the Institute for Creation Research. I had a chance to go to The Ark in Kentucky, but I felt the Lord was guiding me to not go (not because of The Ark, but the circumstances of the trip getting there).

You are very kind. You probably see me in a better light than I see myself. I certainly have my grumpy moments. I feel the Lord is giving me this season of my life to just be. That's really what I feel He was telling me after my dad's burial and I was outside pouring my heart out to the Lord. I feel He was telling me that right now it is enough for me to just be. I feel like I'm being altered. I feel that when I'm through with this season of just being, then the Lord will guide me to His will for my life. And I don't think it has anything to do with me being good at cooking lol




I got quite the chuckle from your question of why I haven't been to the ocean. I live in a landlocked state. Up until 2017, besides Oklahoma, I had only been to Kansas and Missouri. In 2017, I flew for the first time. I went to Atlanta. On the way there, the plane flew along the Gulf...that's as close to a beach as I've been lol. I just never really had the opportunity to travel much in my life. I've mostly always been far away from beaches.

I do like bonfires, and s'mores and hotdogs along with it. I can imagine it's an exceptional experience to have a bonfire on the beach.

I feel like i was in the same boat of just being and with the new job I think it is just an additive to just being because I was so used to working at different locations and driving, which my car has a current electrical issue, so I decided to follow scripture and not have a chariot. It’s still parked in the driveway collecting dusk and spiders. The inside is super clean. Just needs a mechanic to diagnose it and fix it, cause I don’t know much about cars. I’m just a tech guy who use to be really into bicycle riding growing up. I could take a bus or a train just about anywhere I need to go and everything is close by. The bus that comes by my house goes straight to downtown Long Beach or straight to the metro line that goes straight to downtown Los Angeles. Plus, because I was on state disability for the last year, I a bunch of 20 free rides a month stored up with the life program. So I pretty much have over 60 free bus or metro line train rides available at anytime, which I’ll probably use to go to downtown Long Beach to go to the Starbucks that this bus goes straight to.

It seems like the older I get, it’s up to God whether I go or leave cause most of the time I don’t feel strong enough to venture out. Sometimes I feel bold, ready to take on any challenge.

I think I’ve taken maybe 13 or 14 plane rides in my life. 10 to Oahu and back, one to Tennessee for a wedding, one to Las Vegas to work for Mensa the high IQ society, and to Seattle then to Spokane, Washington and back to visit my aunt who is a popular local musician there.

I’ve never met anyone so into biblical creationism. It is really refreshing cause of everyone here thinks the discovery/history channel is 100% truth. Some people watch those channels to learn about the Bible…. People like my dad are brain washed by those channels and believe it is all 100% true, especially ancient aliens. I don’t understand it and most likely never will.

 

[seantspence]

Biblical Creationism is a bit of passion to me. I haven't flown in over a year, but when/if I fly again I'll try to do a long layover in Dallas so I can go to the Institute for Creation Research. I had a chance to go to The Ark in Kentucky, but I felt the Lord was guiding me to not go (not because of The Ark, but the circumstances of the trip getting there).

You are very kind. You probably see me in a better light than I see myself. I certainly have my grumpy moments. I feel the Lord is giving me this season of my life to just be. That's really what I feel He was telling me after my dad's burial and I was outside pouring my heart out to the Lord. I feel He was telling me that right now it is enough for me to just be. I feel like I'm being altered. I feel that when I'm through with this season of just being, then the Lord will guide me to His will for my life. And I don't think it has anything to do with me being good at cooking lol




I got quite the chuckle from your question of why I haven't been to the ocean. I live in a landlocked state. Up until 2017, besides Oklahoma, I had only been to Kansas and Missouri. In 2017, I flew for the first time. I went to Atlanta. On the way there, the plane flew along the Gulf...that's as close to a beach as I've been lol. I just never really had the opportunity to travel much in my life. I've mostly always been far away from beaches.

I do like bonfires, and s'mores and hotdogs along with it. I can imagine it's an exceptional experience to have a bonfire on the beach.

Did you get the institute of creation research email just now?

 

[seantspence]

Biblical Creationism is a bit of passion to me. I haven't flown in over a year, but when/if I fly again I'll try to do a long layover in Dallas so I can go to the Institute for Creation Research. I had a chance to go to The Ark in Kentucky, but I felt the Lord was guiding me to not go (not because of The Ark, but the circumstances of the trip getting there).

You are very kind. You probably see me in a better light than I see myself. I certainly have my grumpy moments. I feel the Lord is giving me this season of my life to just be. That's really what I feel He was telling me after my dad's burial and I was outside pouring my heart out to the Lord. I feel He was telling me that right now it is enough for me to just be. I feel like I'm being altered. I feel that when I'm through with this season of just being, then the Lord will guide me to His will for my life. And I don't think it has anything to do with me being good at cooking lol




I got quite the chuckle from your question of why I haven't been to the ocean. I live in a landlocked state. Up until 2017, besides Oklahoma, I had only been to Kansas and Missouri. In 2017, I flew for the first time. I went to Atlanta. On the way there, the plane flew along the Gulf...that's as close to a beach as I've been lol. I just never really had the opportunity to travel much in my life. I've mostly always been far away from beaches.

I do like bonfires, and s'mores and hotdogs along with it. I can imagine it's an exceptional experience to have a bonfire on the beach.

They asked me if I wanted to subscribe to get a magazine but they never asked my home address. I wonder if they just know hahahah

 

[seantspence]

Biblical Creationism is a bit of passion to me. I haven't flown in over a year, but when/if I fly again I'll try to do a long layover in Dallas so I can go to the Institute for Creation Research. I had a chance to go to The Ark in Kentucky, but I felt the Lord was guiding me to not go (not because of The Ark, but the circumstances of the trip getting there).

You are very kind. You probably see me in a better light than I see myself. I certainly have my grumpy moments. I feel the Lord is giving me this season of my life to just be. That's really what I feel He was telling me after my dad's burial and I was outside pouring my heart out to the Lord. I feel He was telling me that right now it is enough for me to just be. I feel like I'm being altered. I feel that when I'm through with this season of just being, then the Lord will guide me to His will for my life. And I don't think it has anything to do with me being good at cooking lol




I got quite the chuckle from your question of why I haven't been to the ocean. I live in a landlocked state. Up until 2017, besides Oklahoma, I had only been to Kansas and Missouri. In 2017, I flew for the first time. I went to Atlanta. On the way there, the plane flew along the Gulf...that's as close to a beach as I've been lol. I just never really had the opportunity to travel much in my life. I've mostly always been far away from beaches.

I do like bonfires, and s'mores and hotdogs along with it. I can imagine it's an exceptional experience to have a bonfire on the beach.

I had a feeling when I first was going to my church ten years ago that my pastor wanted to sculpt me into his assistant pastor but I definitely screwed up a lot along the way

 

[seantspence]

Biblical Creationism is a bit of passion to me. I haven't flown in over a year, but when/if I fly again I'll try to do a long layover in Dallas so I can go to the Institute for Creation Research. I had a chance to go to The Ark in Kentucky, but I felt the Lord was guiding me to not go (not because of The Ark, but the circumstances of the trip getting there).

You are very kind. You probably see me in a better light than I see myself. I certainly have my grumpy moments. I feel the Lord is giving me this season of my life to just be. That's really what I feel He was telling me after my dad's burial and I was outside pouring my heart out to the Lord. I feel He was telling me that right now it is enough for me to just be. I feel like I'm being altered. I feel that when I'm through with this season of just being, then the Lord will guide me to His will for my life. And I don't think it has anything to do with me being good at cooking lol




I got quite the chuckle from your question of why I haven't been to the ocean. I live in a landlocked state. Up until 2017, besides Oklahoma, I had only been to Kansas and Missouri. In 2017, I flew for the first time. I went to Atlanta. On the way there, the plane flew along the Gulf...that's as close to a beach as I've been lol. I just never really had the opportunity to travel much in my life. I've mostly always been far away from beaches.

I do like bonfires, and s'mores and hotdogs along with it. I can imagine it's an exceptional experience to have a bonfire on the beach.

I told my therapist today that I met someone who is into biblical creationism and she said that I’ll probably have a lot of intellectual conversations with you about it. So that’s cool

 

[CarriePie]

I feel like i was in the same boat of just being and with the new job I think it is just an additive to just being because I was so used to working at different locations and driving, which my car has a current electrical issue, so I decided to follow scripture and not have a chariot. It’s still parked in the driveway collecting dusk and spiders. The inside is super clean. Just needs a mechanic to diagnose it and fix it, cause I don’t know much about cars. I’m just a tech guy who use to be really into bicycle riding growing up. I could take a bus or a train just about anywhere I need to go and everything is close by. The bus that comes by my house goes straight to downtown Long Beach or straight to the metro line that goes straight to downtown Los Angeles. Plus, because I was on state disability for the last year, I a bunch of 20 free rides a month stored up with the life program. So I pretty much have over 60 free bus or metro line train rides available at anytime, which I’ll probably use to go to downtown Long Beach to go to the Starbucks that this bus goes straight to.

It seems like the older I get, it’s up to God whether I go or leave cause most of the time I don’t feel strong enough to venture out. Sometimes I feel bold, ready to take on any challenge.

I think I’ve taken maybe 13 or 14 plane rides in my life. 10 to Oahu and back, one to Tennessee for a wedding, one to Las Vegas to work for Mensa the high IQ society, and to Seattle then to Spokane, Washington and back to visit my aunt who is a popular local musician there.

You aren't the only one with a vehicle parked outside. Dad left me 3 of them lol. The one that's in better condition is a Chevy short bed truck with a standard transmission. It needs minor work, but I am very unfamiliar with working on standards. Growing up, I helped my dad work on vehicles. I remember hoisting motors and transmissions out of trucks with him. However, I'm no mechanic... at all lol.
Though I live on the edge of the country, I live near everywhere I need to go. Errands and shops and eateries are within walking distance. I'm keeping life cheap at the moment and walking is good exercise, so I get where I need to go on foot.

I was just thinking how your life is full of experiences. Compared to me, you've been many places and had many experiences. I feel like I was born an ol' lady lol. In the 5th grade, I had to change schools. Instead of my classmates thinking I was the new student, they thought I was the new teacher lol. I've just always been thought of as being very mature or some have described me as an "old soul." However, my experiences in life pale in comparison to yours!

Side note: Ms Fuzz Butt is at the door again!

Did you get the institute of creation research email just now?

Yes, I did!

They asked me if I wanted to subscribe to get a magazine but they never asked my home address. I wonder if they just know hahahah

LoL Hmm, that's odd. Maybe look into that again? I remember filling out a thing on their site. I've been subscribed for a while, so I can't exactly remember all the details.

I had a feeling when I first was going to my church ten years ago that my pastor wanted to sculpt me into his assistant pastor but I definitely screwed up a lot along the way

Don't be too hard on yourself. Screwing up is something we've all done, just in different ways. I worked with a lady who told me one time, "If you aren't making any mistakes, I don't think you are working." I think life is like that. If you've never screwed up, you haven't lived much and learned what not to do in life.

I told my therapist today that I met someone who is into biblical creationism and she said that I’ll probably have a lot of intellectual conversations with you about it. So that’s cool

You warm heart <3

 

[CarriePie]

You warm heart <3

*my heart, I mean...I guess my hands need warmed so I can type properly. It's been a bit chilly here lately. But, at least tonight isn't like last night. It got to 27 last night.

 

[seantspence]

You aren't the only one with a vehicle parked outside. Dad left me 3 of them lol. The one that's in better condition is a Chevy short bed truck with a standard transmission. It needs minor work, but I am very unfamiliar with working on standards. Growing up, I helped my dad work on vehicles. I remember hoisting motors and transmissions out of trucks with him. However, I'm no mechanic... at all lol.
Though I live on the edge of the country, I live near everywhere I need to go. Errands and shops and eateries are within walking distance. I'm keeping life cheap at the moment and walking is good exercise, so I get where I need to go on foot.

I was just thinking how your life is full of experiences. Compared to me, you've been many places and had many experiences. I feel like I was born an ol' lady lol. In the 5th grade, I had to change schools. Instead of my classmates thinking I was the new student, they thought I was the new teacher lol. I've just always been thought of as being very mature or some have described me as an "old soul." However, my experiences in life pale in comparison to yours!

Side note: Ms Fuzz Butt is at the door again!



Yes, I did!




LoL Hmm, that's odd. Maybe look into that again? I remember filling out a thing on their site. I've been subscribed for a while, so I can't exactly remember all the details.




Don't be too hard on yourself. Screwing up is something we've all done, just in different ways. I worked with a lady who told me one time, "If you aren't making any mistakes, I don't think you are working." I think life is like that. If you've never screwed up, you haven't lived much and learned what not to do in life.



You warm heart <3

I think keeping life on the cheap opens the opportunity of progressing in other areas of your life that don’t involve money and usually it’s a time of inner growth, the pain kind that you talked about.

I’ve had way more experiences than I’ve mentioned. I just come from a pretty wild family. My grandpa that adopted my dad was a multi millionaire that owned a bunch of golf courses, a limo company, was a contractor and married Marylin Monroe’s best friend Jeanie Carmen, women’s trick shot golf and movie star. So when he was alive all of us were able to experience so much. As I got older and money got more tight and people no longer wanted to go on experiences with me involved cause I said no to everyone, people stopped inviting me anywhere. I was just over the parties. I felt like i needed to move on and bury it in my past. All of my friends when i was younger’s parents were well to do. I went to Villa park high school where every house over there is like a mini mansion. Villa park during the time i lived there was the highest capita per household in 2006 when i graduated. That time of my life was a life that Hollywood makes movies about. I lived in a 6500 square foot house in 2011/2012 that my friends parents owned that had a giant dance room. So we would set up dj equipment, fog machines, laser machines, black lights and I’d draw all of the highlighted pictures that the black light would light up in the dark. We’d invite everyone we knew and like 300 people would show up. People from surrounding counties would show up, such as San Diego county and Los Angeles county. In 2005 I lived with another family over there and their parents would give me a $300 weekly allowance without me doing any chores. It was insanity. I was surrounded by mass amounts of wealth. How was a teenager supposed to handle all of that? The attractive women at the time wanting to be where ever all of my friends were at. We were considered the popular kids even though I was very shy back then. It was weird being the kid whose family didn’t have much money around that time but my friends would buy me everything and drive me everywhere in like brand new lifted Denali’s with custom rims and bose sound systems. We use to drive with the windows down and the heater on in the winter. It was the life. It was such a moment in time that was so magical, people would think I’m lying or think because I live with them that I was rich which i wasn’t. I would literally buy new clothes from clothing stores and return them for new clothes, just so it seemed like I always had new clothes. Every girlfriend I’ve ever had a semi serious relationship had parents who had millions and millions of dollars but ever since I moved out to Long Beach ten years ago, this chapter in my life has been completely different. A more humble beginning. It’s like I traded that old life of glitz and glamour to follow Jesus. I lost everything once I accepted Jesus as my lord and savior. The world didn’t accept me anymore. I chose heaven in the after life over heaven on earth. While those people will die and possibly go to hell, never knowing God, I get to have a life where God protects me from the world and holds me in his hands.

 

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*my heart, I mean...I guess my hands need warmed so I can type properly. It's been a bit chilly here lately. But, at least tonight isn't like last night. It got to 27 last night.

I guess it is better than dealing with someone with a heart of stone. There are too many of those out there. Especially where I live.

That is really cold. I was able to sleep without a blanket but I did use a few pillows and blocked myself from the fan

 

[CarriePie]

I think keeping life on the cheap opens the opportunity of progressing in other areas of your life that don’t involve money and usually it’s a time of inner growth, the pain kind that you talked about.

I’ve had way more experiences than I’ve mentioned. I just come from a pretty wild family. My grandpa that adopted my dad was a multi millionaire that owned a bunch of golf courses, a limo company, was a contractor and married Marylin Monroe’s best friend Jeanie Carmen, women’s trick shot golf and movie star. So when he was alive all of us were able to experience so much. As I got older and money got more tight and people no longer wanted to go on experiences with me involved cause I said no to everyone, people stopped inviting me anywhere. I was just over the parties. I felt like i needed to move on and bury it in my past. All of my friends when i was younger’s parents were well to do. I went to Villa park high school where every house over there is like a mini mansion. Villa park during the time i lived there was the highest capita per household in 2006 when i graduated. That time of my life was a life that Hollywood makes movies about. I lived in a 6500 square foot house in 2011/2012 that my friends parents owned that had a giant dance room. So we would set up dj equipment, fog machines, laser machines, black lights and I’d draw all of the highlighted pictures that the black light would light up in the dark. We’d invite everyone we knew and like 300 people would show up. People from surrounding counties would show up, such as San Diego county and Los Angeles county. In 2005 I lived with another family over there and their parents would give me a $300 weekly allowance without me doing any chores. It was insanity. I was surrounded by mass amounts of wealth. How was a teenager supposed to handle all of that? The attractive women at the time wanting to be where ever all of my friends were at. We were considered the popular kids even though I was very shy back then. It was weird being the kid whose family didn’t have much money around that time but my friends would buy me everything and drive me everywhere in like brand new lifted Denali’s with custom rims and bose sound systems. We use to drive with the windows down and the heater on in the winter. It was the life. It was such a moment in time that was so magical, people would think I’m lying or think because I live with them that I was rich which i wasn’t. I would literally buy new clothes from clothing stores and return them for new clothes, just so it seemed like I always had new clothes. Every girlfriend I’ve ever had a semi serious relationship had parents who had millions and millions of dollars but ever since I moved out to Long Beach ten years ago, this chapter in my life has been completely different. A more humble beginning. It’s like I traded that old life of glitz and glamour to follow Jesus. I lost everything once I accepted Jesus as my lord and savior. The world didn’t accept me anymore. I chose heaven in the after life over heaven on earth. While those people will die and possibly go to hell, never knowing God, I get to have a life where God protects me from the world and holds me in his hands.

My dear man, you've lived the high life. I don't know if you want to be talking to me. I'm from the "wrong side of the tracks."
Seriously though, I think choosing the Lord is leaps and bounds beyond anything this world has to offer. He knows all, who better to get guidance from...who better to get anything from.

It could very well be that all the experiences you've had will be used for a great work someday. You chose something..Someone...far better than the life you were living. I think that makes you are rare person. I can envision you making sermons about this.

I have no such stories in comparison. You know, I didn't know how mundane my life really was before now lol. The Lord blessed me with a brain. I wasn't popular at all in school, but I was brainy. However, I didn't do anything with it. I spent most of my life helping my dad. I felt that was my duty.

I guess it is better than dealing with someone with a heart of stone. There are too many of those out there. Especially where I live.

That is really cold. I was able to sleep without a blanket but I did use a few pillows and blocked myself from the fan

Neither of us have a heart of stone, I'm sure of that.

I think I'm seeing the Herm on the cam. And it sounds like one is on the roof. I'm covered in critters!

 

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My dear man, you've lived the high life. I don't know if you want to be talking to me. I'm from the "wrong side of the tracks."
Seriously though, I think choosing the Lord is leaps and bounds beyond anything this world has to offer. He knows all, who better to get guidance from...who better to get anything from.

It could very well be that all the experiences you've had will be used for a great work someday. You chose something..Someone...far better than the life you were living. I think that makes you are rare person. I can envision you making sermons about this.

I have no such stories in comparison. You know, I didn't know how mundane my life really was before now lol. The Lord blessed me with a brain. I wasn't popular at all in school, but I was brainy. However, I didn't do anything with it. I spent most of my life helping my dad. I felt that was my duty.





Neither of us have a heart of stone, I'm sure of that.

I think I'm seeing the Herm on the cam. And it sounds like one is on the roof. I'm covered in critters!

Critter time!

You did something with your braininess, You found biblical creationism and you get to share that with others. I NEVER met anyone with that as a passion. No one has intellectual conversations over here. Tons of people live the superficial life where they project themselves a certain way out in the world but most likely they hide all of their suffering when they go into their home.

The only time I had an intellectual friend was the pastors son who discipled me and showed me the tech world that I got to explore for the last ten years. He could come up with inventions that never existed and like a few years later someone would invent it. He never gave up on me after I went to the mental hospital in 2010. Their whole family treated me very well, as if they were a perfect family from God just for me. A year ago, I started getting more into scripture and realized he no longer had the characteristics of a godly friend after he got married. So I told him we can’t be friends anymore and ever since then we barely talk. He did have twins recently and I asked if I can see them when his brother visits in November but he still hasn’t responded: I still think because he grew up with me and knew about everything I was apart of that he thinks I’m going to do something out of my current character. It’s like he doesn’t want to believe that God can change a person. Last time I spoke to him he asked me why I waste my time with Jesus. So maybe he got a heart of stone now but ever since he said that I knew that God was telling me that it is time to move on. This is someone who told me “Jesus is lord.” Maybe he didn’t mean it in his heart and God saw through it. I don’t know but we had a weird dynamic, where it’s like he was an older brother figure to me and he treated me like the bad screw up brother all the time.

After I got a therapist a year ago, I traded him for the therapist and said bye to the relationship. I didn’t want to feel controlled anymore. It got to the point where I had to run every decision I had by him. Even telling me that his family may have to take care of me for the rest of my life. Funny thing is I would store cash at his house cause he said it was safe and one time he took all of my cash when he got married and moved to Missouri and he spent all of it, saying he needed it just in case… this was like a few thousand dollars that I forgave him for. I told his younger brother about it and he gave me the amount of money that was stolen. I have a relationship with his younger brother who is my age.

And you aren’t from the wrong side of the tracks cause I currently live on the wrong side of the tracks, even though my current neighborhood is technically safe but I live in Long Beach. This was or is gang territory. Compton is the next city over. This is the area where the early 90’s thug rap started. Snoop dogg, Dr. Dre, Tupac. There is tons of homeless in Long Beach, tons of strange people with severe mental illnesses. It seems scary but I can walk about and feel safe.

Everyone in Orange County use to call this place “the ghetto”

I’ve witnessed a prostitute in Compton just take a squat in the middle of a gas station while kids are walking pass while she is taking a leak on the asphalt. I’ve seen 8 year old kids handing crack cocaine that their parents told them to deliver to cars passing by from their houses. Just really dark stuff.

 

[seantspence]

My dear man, you've lived the high life. I don't know if you want to be talking to me. I'm from the "wrong side of the tracks."
Seriously though, I think choosing the Lord is leaps and bounds beyond anything this world has to offer. He knows all, who better to get guidance from...who better to get anything from.

It could very well be that all the experiences you've had will be used for a great work someday. You chose something..Someone...far better than the life you were living. I think that makes you are rare person. I can envision you making sermons about this.

I have no such stories in comparison. You know, I didn't know how mundane my life really was before now lol. The Lord blessed me with a brain. I wasn't popular at all in school, but I was brainy. However, I didn't do anything with it. I spent most of my life helping my dad. I felt that was my duty.





Neither of us have a heart of stone, I'm sure of that.

I think I'm seeing the Herm on the cam. And it sounds like one is on the roof. I'm covered in critters!

There is also drive by showings in this city

 

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There is also drive by showings in this city

Shootings