Massive fight

[The_boy]

Okay, so I'm in college and I have a lot of homework and reading to do. My mom had my dad (separated since I was 8) working on her old house as part of a child support deal they had going. Anyway, mom calls me and asks me to come down and spend some time working with dad on the house and helping them finish up and get moved in. She comes to pick me up (my transportation is a bicycle and they live in another town) and I go to help. Over a period of 3 days I spent over 30 hours busting my tail end doing a lot of heavy work. I single-handedly moved 2 hide-a-beds, 2 chairs, 10 200+ pound branches (she topped the trees too), I kept a burn pile going non-stop (so I had to cut the wood too) played middle-man while mom went looking for stuff dad needed for the place, and generally just didn't get to sit down and rest all weekend. So on the 3rd day of busting it, their is finally a short gap in which I sit down to do some homework. I get 3 sentences read in my book before the little brother comes blasting in making a racket that could cover the noise of a jet-engine. I tell him repeatedly that I'm doing homework and that i need him to be quiet. Mom calls and needs me to play middle-man before I can get even a single question answered. While I have her on the phone I tell her that my brother is being obnoxious and disrespectful... so he screams that I'm lying from about 2 feet away from me, and I slapped his mouth. I did NOT use a level of force that would have so much as more than stung a little... my dad beat the tar outta me so I taught myself CONTROL. Mom tells me to get out of the house, so I walked back to the other one to see if I could help dad. Mom finally gets back and she makes a B-line to me and starts screaming at me. I told her that I didn't care what her OPINION of what happened was, the fact was that I came down at their request to bust MY butt (cuz I'm the only one physically capable of it) and while I'm busting MY butt I can't even have enough quiet to do some homework that I TOLD her I would need to do because there was a lot of it. So she continues to gripe at me and I told her that since she CLEARLY didn't appreciate my help she could take me back home... she told me to walk (40 miles the short way cross country) so I packed my things and left. She had the decency to change her mind before I got out of town, but she took me home. Next day she wants to know why I didn't call and say hi blah blah blah and I told her I was still severly miffed to begin with and MORE miffed that she didn't even bother to apologize for her behavior. She told me that I was being a wuss, and my response was "Lose my phone number, don't contact me, and forget that you have a 23 year old son... I don't acknowledge you as my mother anymore since you CLEARLY don't appreciate me enough to even have common courtesy or decency." and I hung up. I can honestly say that I don't regret what I said nor do I want to take it back. The whole deal has had me irate for days now and I want to know some others' opinions.

 

[Deadtosin]

Hi brother, I can honestly say I've been there, and I understand. The truth is that people in this world, they get so caught up in what "they" are doing, and "this" life that they get blinded by the simplicities of how their actions and lifestyle effects other people. I get amazed, time after time that my father could be so selfish, that everything he does, seems to revolve around what he needs or wants, that he isn't even aware that he deprives others of their rights of things. Unfortunately, its not really their fault. We know through the bible that they are "ACTUALLY" blind. How can you blame a blind man for walking into a wall or stepping on your foot? All we can do is forgive them, even if they don't ask. Because they won't even understand what they did to begin with it will only end up hurting everybody. The prayer should then come from us, we pray that they seek the Lord so they can have their eyes opened because you don't want your brother and others to be mislead by the blindness that has crippled the world. They are blind to love. Blind to truth, even blind to how their actions effect others, let alone themselves. These blindness's can take place in many forms. How we help them, it seems they thought it was owed to them, they don't want to hear our problems- as though their time is to important to hear our problems due to our ignorance and stupidity *as they see it. (woe is me, woe is me, is the constant outcry, because "THEY" suffer beyond what anyone suffers, and nobody see's what they have always done. Even when they haven't done much in a long time. Brother, we know they are blind. Our allegiance isn't to them, its to God. This world is temporary. The Lord says to serve others as you would serve Him. The reward isn't from them, its from Him. Consider it joy when they don't appreciate you and make things difficult. Satan plays a very real part in the constant harassment to get you to lose your cool. Pray and dwell in the Lord. God bless. The reward is from GOD. Feel free to add me as a friend. God bless bro.

 

[BrittanyJones]

What would Jesus do?

 

[Crossfire]

Hi brother, I can honestly say I've been there, and I understand. The truth is that people in this world, they get so caught up in what "they" are doing, and "this" life that they get blinded by the simplicities of how their actions and lifestyle effects other people. I get amazed, time after time that my father could be so selfish, that everything he does, seems to revolve around what he needs or wants, that he isn't even aware that he deprives others of their rights of things. Unfortunately, its not really their fault. We know through the bible that they are "ACTUALLY" blind. How can you blame a blind man for walking into a wall or stepping on your foot? All we can do is forgive them, even if they don't ask. Because they won't even understand what they did to begin with it will only end up hurting everybody. The prayer should then come from us, we pray that they seek the Lord so they can have their eyes opened because you don't want your brother and others to be mislead by the blindness that has crippled the world. They are blind to love. Blind to truth, even blind to how their actions effect others, let alone themselves. These blindness's can take place in many forms. How we help them, it seems they thought it was owed to them, they don't want to hear our problems- as though their time is to important to hear our problems due to our ignorance and stupidity *as they see it. (woe is me, woe is me, is the constant outcry, because "THEY" suffer beyond what anyone suffers, and nobody see's what they have always done. Even when they haven't done much in a long time. Brother, we know they are blind. Our allegiance isn't to them, its to God. This world is temporary. The Lord says to serve others as you would serve Him. The reward isn't from them, its from Him. Consider it joy when they don't appreciate you and make things difficult. Satan plays a very real part in the constant harassment to get you to lose your cool. Pray and dwell in the Lord. God bless. The reward is from GOD. Feel free to add me as a friend. God bless bro.

Very good word!

 

[zeroturbulence]

Hi brother, I can honestly say I've been there, and I understand. The truth is that people in this world, they get so caught up in what "they" are doing, and "this" life that they get blinded by the simplicities of how their actions and lifestyle effects other people. I get amazed, time after time that my father could be so selfish, that everything he does, seems to revolve around what he needs or wants, that he isn't even aware that he deprives others of their rights of things. Unfortunately, its not really their fault. We know through the bible that they are "ACTUALLY" blind. How can you blame a blind man for walking into a wall or stepping on your foot? All we can do is forgive them, even if they don't ask. Because they won't even understand what they did to begin with it will only end up hurting everybody. The prayer should then come from us, we pray that they seek the Lord so they can have their eyes opened because you don't want your brother and others to be mislead by the blindness that has crippled the world. They are blind to love. Blind to truth, even blind to how their actions effect others, let alone themselves. These blindness's can take place in many forms. How we help them, it seems they thought it was owed to them, they don't want to hear our problems- as though their time is to important to hear our problems due to our ignorance and stupidity *as they see it. (woe is me, woe is me, is the constant outcry, because "THEY" suffer beyond what anyone suffers, and nobody see's what they have always done. Even when they haven't done much in a long time. Brother, we know they are blind. Our allegiance isn't to them, its to God. This world is temporary. The Lord says to serve others as you would serve Him. The reward isn't from them, its from Him. Consider it joy when they don't appreciate you and make things difficult. Satan plays a very real part in the constant harassment to get you to lose your cool. Pray and dwell in the Lord. God bless. The reward is from GOD. Feel free to add me as a friend. God bless bro.

Thats one of the most awesome things I ever read!! God bless you for sharing that. I think it is going to help me a lot.

 

[shekaniah]

If you are trying to do God's will, then you know it is your job to give people grace. DeadtoSin has spoken well. I have often had to take a deep breath, say a prayer, and then talk to my mom. Only by God's love am I able to stay in contact with her. She was very abusive to my siblings and I.
She does not remember it, the same way we do. But as DeadtoSin pointed out, she was blinded to it. Hope you ask God to guide you.
god bless

 

[Snackersmom]

Deadtosin is right, your Mom probably won't apologize for her behavior. Cutting her off does seem a bit harsh, but only God knows if you made the right decision, so I won't judge. But I would suggest, when you don't feel irate anymore, that you ask the Big Boss if you did right. Hard to do, I know, because you have to be open to the possibility of being told that you did something wrong, and NOBODY likes that, including Snackersmom. But, it is a good way to grow, and I recommend it highly. If The Big Mr. shows you that you did something wrong, then I would go ahead and apologize for it, even though it sounds like she started it. At least you'll set a good example for her, right? You never know, she may follow your lead......And, about the little Brother. Annoying, yes, but he probably loves you to death, and driving you bonkers is the only way he knows how to show it (I've got 2 little bros myself). Maybe you could apologize for smackin' 'im? I know you didn't hit him hard, but still......You may be the only stable adult in his life right now, and he probably needs you. Try to maintain the relationship for HIS sake, if nothing else, maybe spend some "guys only" time with him, if you can. And, don't forget to tell him about Jesus! Big brothers carry a lot of clout........ God Bless! -Nicole

 

[MissCris]

Okay, so I'm in college and I have a lot of homework and reading to do. My mom had my dad (separated since I was 8) working on her old house as part of a child support deal they had going. Anyway, mom calls me and asks me to come down and spend some time working with dad on the house and helping them finish up and get moved in. She comes to pick me up (my transportation is a bicycle and they live in another town) and I go to help. Over a period of 3 days I spent over 30 hours busting my tail end doing a lot of heavy work. I single-handedly moved 2 hide-a-beds, 2 chairs, 10 200+ pound branches (she topped the trees too), I kept a burn pile going non-stop (so I had to cut the wood too) played middle-man while mom went looking for stuff dad needed for the place, and generally just didn't get to sit down and rest all weekend. So on the 3rd day of busting it, their is finally a short gap in which I sit down to do some homework. I get 3 sentences read in my book before the little brother comes blasting in making a racket that could cover the noise of a jet-engine. I tell him repeatedly that I'm doing homework and that i need him to be quiet. Mom calls and needs me to play middle-man before I can get even a single question answered. While I have her on the phone I tell her that my brother is being obnoxious and disrespectful... so he screams that I'm lying from about 2 feet away from me, and I slapped his mouth. I did NOT use a level of force that would have so much as more than stung a little... my dad beat the tar outta me so I taught myself CONTROL. Mom tells me to get out of the house, so I walked back to the other one to see if I could help dad. Mom finally gets back and she makes a B-line to me and starts screaming at me. I told her that I didn't care what her OPINION of what happened was, the fact was that I came down at their request to bust MY butt (cuz I'm the only one physically capable of it) and while I'm busting MY butt I can't even have enough quiet to do some homework that I TOLD her I would need to do because there was a lot of it. So she continues to gripe at me and I told her that since she CLEARLY didn't appreciate my help she could take me back home... she told me to walk (40 miles the short way cross country) so I packed my things and left. She had the decency to change her mind before I got out of town, but she took me home. Next day she wants to know why I didn't call and say hi blah blah blah and I told her I was still severly miffed to begin with and MORE miffed that she didn't even bother to apologize for her behavior. She told me that I was being a wuss, and my response was "Lose my phone number, don't contact me, and forget that you have a 23 year old son... I don't acknowledge you as my mother anymore since you CLEARLY don't appreciate me enough to even have common courtesy or decency." and I hung up. I can honestly say that I don't regret what I said nor do I want to take it back. The whole deal has had me irate for days now and I want to know some others' opinions.

I'm sorry, I think you handled this very badly. It was nice of you to do all that work, and I understand wanting a little appreciation for your effort and time, especially when you had other things you needed to do, but do you honestly feel that slapping someone out of anger, regardless of amount of force behind it, is showing 'control'? As someone before me has posted, What would Jesus do? Can you imagine Jesus popping anyone in the mouth for any reason?

I also am not so sure that what you said to your mother was the right thing, either. She had every right to be upset with you over the situation with your brother, though I don't think it warranted such a strong reaction from her. Even so, aren't we supposed to "Honor thy father and mother"? It doesn't go on to say, "But only if they are being nice to you", or "But only if they are behaving like adults".

I know that family fights can be tricky to deal with, Lord knows we all have problems sometimes. It makes me sad, however, when ever anybody is so angry that they basically just remove themselves from their family. I think it's better to say what you're feeling and then take a little time to cool down and get over it, rather than disown someone and leave ugly, angry words hanging that you can't take back. Imagine how you would feel if something happened to your mom or your brother at this point. Would you want your last memory of either of them to be an ugly fight?

 

[AgeofKnowledge]

It's clear you come from a somewhat dysfunctional family (many people do). If you continue to mature in Christ, someday you will regret putting your hands on your little brother like you did because he annoyed you. I applaud you for not being codependent to the dsynfunction but you are yourself dysfunctional and evidently not aware of it yet. I pray you become aware of it and and work through a Celebrate Recovery or some other Christian program designed to bring these issues to the surface and properly address them. Otherwise, statistically you will carry it into your future relationships while living in denial of it. I've seen it all before. In the meanwhile, you do have the grace of God.

 

[Brighthouse]

Rather then tell you if you were right or wrong,allow me please to tell you a true story, that may help you to consider what you did. I grew up in a very tough home as well,my father was a policeman,he never had a kind word for anyone. At 17 I took my last beating from him,I took a chair,and told him that if he ever hit my mom or me again, I would end his suffering!!

He kept is gun high in the closet area,that night,when he was sleep after 10 beers, he was a drunk as well,I grabbed the gun,and laid it facing him when he woke up,I hated him. He never said a word to me about this,he never hit my mom or me again either! 2 weeks later he had a massive heart attack and died,I did what he said I would do,after the funeral I told my mom and brother to wait in the car,and I went number one on his grave.

I was unsaved at this time,when Jesus found me many years later I was 22,I had just served 2 tours in Vietnam,and was having all kinds of problems holding a job. I said all of this,to tell you this. There is not one day now, that goes by that I do not wish my father was here,so I could tell him how sorry I was for what I said and did to him.

True perhaps he would not care,but Jesus does.( matt 18:21-35) We have a higher calling then the world we live in,matters not how others treat people,it only matters how we treat people! The most powerful weapon in all the world is not the colbalt bomb, it is what comes out of our mouth!

Words can heal us up,or they can tear us apart. Now I understand this,it took 8 long years and this scripture for the lord to get through a very hard headed man like myself! I do not know where in Jesus you are bro,I do not judge you!!( john 15:18-20) What I have learned the hard way,I pray you do not have to!! Because brother,love covers a multitude of sins!( 1 Peter 4:8-10)

I know it is not easy in life,I also know, that by holding to the pain of what others has done to us,does us even less good! GRACE is the transparent willingness to be who we are before God, before others.Please take this grace you now have,and use this to love those who have done you wrong.For in so doing,you peace, will return back unto you!!( john 14:27) And Jesus who you serve,will rejoice in you as well!! Blessing bro!

 

[dmdave17]

I know it is not easy in life,I also know, that by holding to the pain of what others has done to us,does us even less good! GRACE is the transparent willingness to be who we are before God, before others.Please take this grace you now have,and use this to love those who have done you wrong.For in so doing,you peace, will return back unto you!!( john 14:27) And Jesus who you serve,will rejoice in you as well!! Blessing bro!

How very true! God in His wisdom admonishes us to forgive, not for the sake of the people we forgive, but for ourselves. As long as we carry around the anger and bitterness, and guilt, of being unforgiving, we open a door for the devil to drive a wedge between ourselves and Christ. While you do not have to embrace your family, you need to forgive them in your heart.

​

 

[djness]

Okay, so I'm in college and I have a lot of homework and reading to do. My mom had my dad (separated since I was 8) working on her old house as part of a child support deal they had going. Anyway, mom calls me and asks me to come down and spend some time working with dad on the house and helping them finish up and get moved in. She comes to pick me up (my transportation is a bicycle and they live in another town) and I go to help. Over a period of 3 days I spent over 30 hours busting my tail end doing a lot of heavy work. I single-handedly moved 2 hide-a-beds, 2 chairs, 10 200+ pound branches (she topped the trees too), I kept a burn pile going non-stop (so I had to cut the wood too) played middle-man while mom went looking for stuff dad needed for the place, and generally just didn't get to sit down and rest all weekend. So on the 3rd day of busting it, their is finally a short gap in which I sit down to do some homework. I get 3 sentences read in my book before the little brother comes blasting in making a racket that could cover the noise of a jet-engine. I tell him repeatedly that I'm doing homework and that i need him to be quiet. Mom calls and needs me to play middle-man before I can get even a single question answered. While I have her on the phone I tell her that my brother is being obnoxious and disrespectful... so he screams that I'm lying from about 2 feet away from me, and I slapped his mouth. I did NOT use a level of force that would have so much as more than stung a little... my dad beat the tar outta me so I taught myself CONTROL. Mom tells me to get out of the house, so I walked back to the other one to see if I could help dad. Mom finally gets back and she makes a B-line to me and starts screaming at me. I told her that I didn't care what her OPINION of what happened was, the fact was that I came down at their request to bust MY butt (cuz I'm the only one physically capable of it) and while I'm busting MY butt I can't even have enough quiet to do some homework that I TOLD her I would need to do because there was a lot of it. So she continues to gripe at me and I told her that since she CLEARLY didn't appreciate my help she could take me back home... she told me to walk (40 miles the short way cross country) so I packed my things and left. She had the decency to change her mind before I got out of town, but she took me home. Next day she wants to know why I didn't call and say hi blah blah blah and I told her I was still severly miffed to begin with and MORE miffed that she didn't even bother to apologize for her behavior. She told me that I was being a wuss, and my response was "Lose my phone number, don't contact me, and forget that you have a 23 year old son... I don't acknowledge you as my mother anymore since you CLEARLY don't appreciate me enough to even have common courtesy or decency." and I hung up. I can honestly say that I don't regret what I said nor do I want to take it back. The whole deal has had me irate for days now and I want to know some others' opinions.

Looks to me like you were perfectly in your right.

Who calls their son a wuss?...

 

[Tobby17]

Man needs a little appreciation for what he does, but then expecting this appreciation from everybody will only get you DISAPPOINTED.. From one disappointment to another, Human beings are naturally ungrateful, a child will easily forget the good things you do for him but will never forget the day you beat hell out of them... It's in the nature of men to be ungrateful. Maybe you don't need all these long talks.But please for the sake of Peace and God, Forgive!... Whatever you do, for your parents see it as a Duty and just wait and see if God personally won't reward you..

See ya!

 

[eelhsa]

I can understand the frustration that comes from having an at times toxic relationship with parents. I also know how it is to feel that your parents take your help for granted. I currently live with my parents and have lived with them for several years, since finishing college. It was never my choice or desire to move back in with them, but I was laid off from my job and since then have only been able to find a seasonal job, which does not earn enough money to pay rent somewhere. Anyway, I'm saying this because, since I live here, my parents understandably expect me to help out around here. It doesn't seem to matter how much I do though, every time I say I need to do something for myself, (such as checking job listings or cleaning my room), my mom reminds me that I still need to help out around here. It's seems as if when she says that, that she's implying I never do anything to help out. I also feel a lot of anxiety about what they expect of me. If I'm sitting down searching for jobs online, I feel pressure to be up and doing things around the house.

I just try to be patient and I believe it's important to remind ourselves in situations like this that everything we do, we actually do for the LORD and not just for other people. It's reassuring I think to remember this, because we know that Jesus knows all we do, and even if people don't notice or give us the gratitude we believe they should, it all matters to God.

Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one for whatever good they do, whether they are slave or free. - Ephesians 6:5-8 NIV

I have to remind myself that I shouldn't really be looking for praise and recognition anyway, I should instead be seeking to serve God. Jesus tells us we should be servants to others, and He was Himself very humble and did not seek to gain praise or recognition, (although He is the One who truly deserves it). The model He leaves for us to follow is one of loving others and doing good in the world, whether we get the thanks we should or not. What we do to help others is not diminished just because it is not recognized by other people. The truth is, people will make mistakes, and the people that love us the most often hurt us the most. They will fall short, just as we ourselves often fall short. Things in this life don't always go the way we wish they would, which is why we have to make God and living our lives for Him our highest goal.

“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’ “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’ - Matthew 25:37-40

 

[zeroturbulence]

Rather then tell you if you were right or wrong,allow me please to tell you a true story, that may help you to consider what you did. I grew up in a very tough home as well,my father was a policeman,he never had a kind word for anyone. At 17 I took my last beating from him,I took a chair,and told him that if he ever hit my mom or me again, I would end his suffering!!

He kept is gun high in the closet area,that night,when he was sleep after 10 beers, he was a drunk as well,I grabbed the gun,and laid it facing him when he woke up,I hated him. He never said a word to me about this,he never hit my mom or me again either! 2 weeks later he had a massive heart attack and died,I did what he said I would do,after the funeral I told my mom and brother to wait in the car,and I went number one on his grave.

I was unsaved at this time,when Jesus found me many years later I was 22,I had just served 2 tours in Vietnam,and was having all kinds of problems holding a job. I said all of this,to tell you this. There is not one day now, that goes by that I do not wish my father was here,so I could tell him how sorry I was for what I said and did to him.

True perhaps he would not care,but Jesus does.( matt 18:21-35) We have a higher calling then the world we live in,matters not how others treat people,it only matters how we treat people! The most powerful weapon in all the world is not the colbalt bomb, it is what comes out of our mouth!

Words can heal us up,or they can tear us apart. Now I understand this,it took 8 long years and this scripture for the lord to get through a very hard headed man like myself! I do not know where in Jesus you are bro,I do not judge you!!( john 15:18-20) What I have learned the hard way,I pray you do not have to!! Because brother,love covers a multitude of sins!( 1 Peter 4:8-10)

I know it is not easy in life,I also know, that by holding to the pain of what others has done to us,does us even less good! GRACE is the transparent willingness to be who we are before God, before others.Please take this grace you now have,and use this to love those who have done you wrong.For in so doing,you peace, will return back unto you!!( john 14:27) And Jesus who you serve,will rejoice in you as well!! Blessing bro!

Thank you for that testimony, and thank you for serving our country. I'm filipino but lived in america all my life.

 

[Bobbyking]

I can honestly say that I don't regret what I said nor do I want to take it back. The whole deal has had me irate for days now and I want to know some others' opinions.

Hi

Thanks for the sincere sharing. Toiling through three days of back-breaking labor and none of them was appreciative or even say a word of thanks? That's tough on you, brother. And it gets more frustrating when it comes from your own mum and dad.

Regardless of people's actions or words, we are free to make our own choices of words and actions. I believe this is the most important point of being 'free in Christ'; that we can make right choices for ourselves in the Lord. In my opinion, I would avoid the slapping part if I could, and probably not use the sentences 'don't acknowledge you as a mother anymore...' Physical response really does not get you anywhere and regardless of whether she appreciates you or not, she will always be your mother.

Have you seek the Lord regarding this situation? Has He pointed out the specific actions that you are wrong in? If you truly want to be free, then ask for His forgiveness. And if He asks you to apologize to your mother, then by all means go ahead. I am not playing God here, but merely ask you to seek Him for his guidance. But note this: if you truly want His peace that surpasses all understanding, then follow and obey Him, whatever He tells you. Whatever our circumstances, make peace with Him first and then with the people around you. You can't go wrong in this.

And in the end, the one that truly triumph is YOU!

 

[Puddles]

Hey dude, I have so been there.

I could tell you my story, but it's pretty much like yours in so many ways.

I have prayed for you, because least of all, it was God himself that sorted my situation out. Just so you know I moved out one week later. And I am not the kinda person that ever moves fast. Its just that...all these mysterious and sudden opportunities suddenly happened.

I truely believe God will provide for you, just as he did for me.

Please, let us know how it goes. Cheers dude. God bless you.

 

[leelee]

No matter how much they annoy you you can't choose them or replace them. You only get one mum! and we know Jesus dearly loved his.

 

[Chinekwu]

As Christians,I believe we're all trying to be like Christ (and that's hard knowng Jesus was just perfect!)...In most situations I ask myself...-What will Jesus do?
People can be irritating,annoying,unbelievable etc (Trust me,I know cos I have six sisters with "totally" different personalities and I also have a dad that once told me that he hates me). Permit me to say this but if u've been thru' half (just half) of what I've been thru' with my parents especially with my dad..u might have killed urself by now cos u would believe u could NEVER get 2 forgive him. God said something 2 me- "What If U die now (what if u just die right now) and U come before Me and the only thing keeping U 4rm entering My Kingdom is a little unforgiveness...just that?!"
It's difficult but now by God's grace no matter what people do/say 2 me-I forgive them. I ask God 2 help me..
Remember this prayer- "Forgive us our sins AS we forgive those that sin against us"???
Anytime someone 'sins' against me,I try to forgive the person immediately..even the person comes to apologise (that's if they apologise) and in the same way,I expect God to forgive me "as I forgive those that sin against me"...by forgiving me even before I come before HIM to tell HIM I'm sorry.
Also...u're hindering God's blessings 4 U by not forgiving..and trust me..No one is worth that!
God's grace,strength and wisdom as u handle this situation.......