Give me bad advice...

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Browse an internet shopping site when u have had a couple of drinks 😒 .
 
Maybe your cat needs a bit of variety in his / her life ? Why not give your cat a different food to the one that they normally really enjoy ? While u r at it , try a different brand of cat litter too ! Just watch their little faces ! Who says cats don't have expressions ? U could also turn the music up a bit , maybe they love Slipknot 🙀🙀🙀
 
Guys , this is just for u . R u single and attracted to a single lady at church ? U don't know her at all and have barely spoken to her ? She has never shown any interest in u ? Maybe u shouldn't approach her directly to try to get to know her , maybe it's better if u regularly send her a long rambling letter , mixing your religious dogma with heart felt declarations of love and very personal revelations about your previous dating life . Don't talk to her in person ! U might scare her off 😆😆😆😆😆😆😆
 
The first time that your dog / cat wakes u up at 5am because it's hungry and lonely for u , get up , feed it and play with it for an hour . Do this if u want a 5am alarm call every day for the rest of your pets life .
 
Think that u will b ok cooking a live crab / lobster 🥺 . I put it back in the sea .
 
Never hesitate to put your money into someone else's bank account ! And if any one ever asks u to co sign a loan for them , do it ! This applies to mortgages also , it's a great idea to get a joint mortgage with someone that u r not married to ! 👍👍👍
 
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I've had a long and varied life , full of mistakes , most r mine but some r mistakes that others around me have made . No names given to protect them from shame 😞
 
Here's a good one , get so drunk that u pee the bed in the night and expect your partner to clear the mess up next morning 🤪
 
Suze said:
My mum was actually going to do this ; eat the rest of that steak that u cooked yourself last night , couldn't finish so , left it overnight in the microwave . 🤷
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a while back, 1 day at work, i told the guys i would buy them lunch while they cleaned up the tree i cut down. so 1 guy said, "get me any sandwich". this is what i got him: a sandwich with blood tongue, fish, liver & worcestershire sauce. he ate it, none of us could believe it but he did!
 
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Karlon said:
a while back, 1 day at work, i told the guys i would buy them lunch while they cleaned up the tree i cut down. so 1 guy said, "get me any sandwich". this is what i got him: a sandwich with blood tongue, fish, liver & worcestershire sauce. he ate it, none of us could believe it but he did!
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Suze said:
Go to someone's house , that u have never met before , they have recently been released from prison after serving 5 years for manslaughter . Tell them that u used to know someone from around here , their name was Terry and they had a brother that was murdered . Enjoy the icy silence . I did that 😞 .
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I think I know who you were talking too. The guy that got released from Prison came to my door looking for the previous tenant.
 
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Get married, but after a couple of years have an affair. Nobody's gonna know, because you are married right? Also trust your lover to keep it all secret.

Not saying I've done anything like that. But I know people that did because they told everyone.
 
Lanolin said:
Get married, but after a couple of years have an affair. Nobody's gonna know, because you are married right? Also trust your lover to keep it all secret.

Not saying I've done anything like that. But I know people that did because they told everyone.
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a reminder of this: once, i was at a restaurant for dinner & a few. 5 girls were out together having a super fun time then they were headed to the casino. there was 1 seat left, right next to the girls. some asked if they minded i sat there. the girl next to me was very anxious for me to sit. i sat down & she began a talk. she wanted to know if i would join them & i politely spoke i had a g.f. she says, "so what, you can still go out with us". i declined. then a half hour later, the girls left the girl who spoke to me snuck a kiss behind my head on my neck!!!
 
Lanolin said:
Make plans with friends, then cancel at the last minute.
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i just laughed out loud quite a bit. my 1st laugh of the day. sometimes, the simplest statements are so phunnneee! partly, because that's what people do often.
 
Listen to me
You must take Lanolin's advice
She is never wrong!!

If it turns out that it is..post your experience here.
 
next time anyone takes a shower, spray bleach & 3M super 77 spray adhesive on your orbital sandpaper & shower with it for at least 1 hour!
 
Karlon said:
next time anyone takes a shower, spray bleach & 3M super 77 spray adhesive on your orbital sandpaper & shower with it for at least 1 hour!
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Ok, I will do that tonight and see if it works. Hold on, I don't have any 3M super 77 spray adhesive or an orbital sandpaper....but I do have something better, a shower bomb!

If the shower blows up, as I think it might... I will talk to the manufacturer and ask for a refund.
 
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