Just got dumped

[SadGotDumped]

Hello,

There was a man, Acts 16:30 KJV , who asked, "Sirs what must I do to be saved?"
Why did he need saved?
A: because he about died and was not going to Heaven.
Before a person can get saved, they need to understand that they need saved so they can receive God's gift of everlasting life.

When I was around my early-mid teens someone cared enough to share the following Bible truth with me. God is not hiding it from us. In fact, He's showing this to you right now, so please pray seriously for understanding and an open Bible. Follow along with the preacher and pause/rewind where necessary.
I'll check back to answer your questions as I have time today.
Praying for you.

God is pretty much hiding from me. I feel gaslighted and maipulated. Every good thing in my life is from God, but every bad thing isn't.

Talking to me in a languge I don't understand on purpose just to say you are technically talking to me, is the same as silence.

Why am I required to read a book, half of which has nothing to do with any of my problems, to get guidence?
Why can't he tell me what to do, or what passage to read. If he is talking through you guys, why couldn't he do it myself.

I am scared he doesn't exist and I am being maipulated by my own hopes, dreams, fears and feelings, into reading the Bible and going to Church to convince myself he exists when he doesn't. I wish I had some sort of real proof. I wish he would appear to me like he did in the old testament. Even the demons believe but they have seen Him so that's different.

I don't know if anyone even understands this.

I feel like
A) God has the ability to talk to me but refuses. Saying "I can't reveal my plan yet, but I have one" with his own voice would honestly be enough. I would be frustrated about not knowing the plan but at least I would feel MUCH better knowing God exists and has a plan
B) He doesn't exist. And there is no garrentte I will have a good life, or reward for good works, or punishment for evil. I could just marry for money, start an only fans, steal, do anything to live the life I want with no punishment other than death, therefore peace. I won't do evil, because deep down I will always believe in God too much, but still.

 

[cinder]

I don't want to work 40 hours a week all my life and have no time for friends, hobbies, and housework. I just fundementally don't want that

I work 40 hours per week, do all my housework and yardwork, have time for hobbies and friends and posting on cc and church stuff.

And when I was 20 I thought that would be a miserable meaningless fate, but I find that the stability and routine are good for me.

But when it comes to meaning and passion in life, it almost all comes from interpersonal connections (even if those people are animals that need extra love and care and patience)

These days (I'm 44 now), my dog is essential companionship (my mom says I turned all my maternal instinct into caring for dog) but also limits me as she's got reactivity issues which means she can't be left in a kennel or cared for by a stranger. And the big faith and mental health challenge is to believe God has good things for the future when all that seems certain is that my dog will die, my parents will die, and I will decline and become less physically capable and not know who I can turn to for help. If someone had explained to me that this is where life ends up when you don't have a spouse and children back when I was 20 I don't know if I would have listened, but I know they would have done right by me by telling me about the reality.

 

[SadGotDumped]

Hello,

There was a man, Acts 16:30 KJV , who asked, "Sirs what must I do to be saved?"
Why did he need saved?
A: because he about died and was not going to Heaven.
Before a person can get saved, they need to understand that they need saved so they can receive God's gift of everlasting life.

When I was around my early-mid teens someone cared enough to share the following Bible truth with me. God is not hiding it from us. In fact, He's showing this to you right now, so please pray seriously for understanding and an open Bible. Follow along with the preacher and pause/rewind where necessary.
I'll check back to answer your questions as I have time today.
Praying for you.

But no one is telling me, why cant he appear to me like in the old testament. I don't want to be a prophet or a big important, favored figure, I just want one moment, just one. Maybe One every 10 years to be honest. Why not? It's not like he is busy. Why can't he talk to me normally. Like a real friend.




I feel like he is hiding from me. I feel like

A) He has full abilty to say "Hi, I can't reveal my plan yet but I have one" with his own voice. Full ability to give me a little reassurance and proof he exists, but doesn't. If he can talk through people and books, why can't he talk to me.
B) He doesn't exist and all my feelings are just some evolutionary byproduct of advanced intelligence. Just something that gave past generations enough hope to continue on. If he doesn't exist, why should I not just end this life I hate and finnaly have peace?

 

[SadGotDumped]

I work 40 hours per week, do all my housework and yardwork, have time for hobbies and friends and posting on cc and church stuff.

And when I was 20 I thought that would be a miserable meaningless fate, but I find that the stability and routine are good for me.

But when it comes to meaning and passion in life, it almost all comes from interpersonal connections (even if those people are animals that need extra love and care and patience)

These days (I'm 44 now), my dog is essential companionship (my mom says I turned all my maternal instinct into caring for dog) but also limits me as she's got reactivity issues which means she can't be left in a kennel or cared for by a stranger. And the big faith and mental health challenge is to believe God has good things for the future when all that seems certain is that my dog will die, my parents will die, and I will decline and become less physically capable and not know who I can turn to for help. If someone had explained to me that this is where life ends up when you don't have a spouse and children back when I was 20 I don't know if I would have listened, but I know they would have done right by me by telling me about the reality.

No offense, I am in a really bad place, but genuinely that is my worst fear.

I think if you are happy that is wonderful! Of course you should be happy. I just know I would not be. If that was my life by the time I was even 30, I would end it. I can't do that. I hate my life as is, I can't watch it just get worse. I can't handle that.

If my life is going to be something I hate? Why would God do this too me? To anyone? I wish I was never born. Why would he give me a life I hate and find miserable just to send me to Hell after for not loving Him enough. To me that's just so evil.

 

[SadGotDumped]

The idea of me being 40, working full time, single, living alone. Makes me want to just end it now.

I don't even want to try anymore. I'm just waiting to get a job so I can afford to buy a helium tank or a gun.

 

[SadGotDumped]

Sorry this didn't end well and I wasn't the most receptive. I just feel hopeless now. There is nothing more for me, and God probably doesn't even exist. So what is wrong with ending it and being in silence or non existent, the way I wish I was. I wish I was never created, and why would God create something only to suffer? There are people with much worse lives than me who then go to Hell, why would God create people who wish they were never created? That is cruel. I wish we had the option just to disappear.

 

[SadGotDumped]

I work 40 hours per week, do all my housework and yardwork, have time for hobbies and friends and posting on cc and church stuff.

And when I was 20 I thought that would be a miserable meaningless fate, but I find that the stability and routine are good for me.

But when it comes to meaning and passion in life, it almost all comes from interpersonal connections (even if those people are animals that need extra love and care and patience)

These days (I'm 44 now), my dog is essential companionship (my mom says I turned all my maternal instinct into caring for dog) but also limits me as she's got reactivity issues which means she can't be left in a kennel or cared for by a stranger. And the big faith and mental health challenge is to believe God has good things for the future when all that seems certain is that my dog will die, my parents will die, and I will decline and become less physically capable and not know who I can turn to for help. If someone had explained to me that this is where life ends up when you don't have a spouse and children back when I was 20 I don't know if I would have listened, but I know they would have done right by me by telling me about the reality.

I get you are being honest, but this doesn't make me feel better at all. You still have so much to worry about and your over twice my age? I'm going to have to be stressed, worried, and overworked all my life. I can't.

 

[SadGotDumped]

Honestly guys, I give up. Unless I find a good man to marry me in law school, before I get a job, I'm done. Unless God Himself tells me not to give up.

But even then, if he is going to send me to Hell for not loving him enough anyway, why should I even live my life the way he wants? So far his plan for me sucks, and I know many christians think the same way.

 

[Lynx]

But no one is telling me, why cant he appear to me like in the old testament. I don't want to be a prophet or a big important, favored figure, I just want one moment, just one. Maybe One every 10 years to be honest. Why not? It's not like he is busy. Why can't he talk to me normally. Like a real friend.




I feel like he is hiding from me. I feel like

A) He has full abilty to say "Hi, I can't reveal my plan yet but I have one" with his own voice. Full ability to give me a little reassurance and proof he exists, but doesn't. If he can talk through people and books, why can't he talk to me.
B) He doesn't exist and all my feelings are just some evolutionary byproduct of advanced intelligence. Just something that gave past generations enough hope to continue on. If he doesn't exist, why should I not just end this life I hate and finnaly have peace?

Heh... I'm glad God has NOT done that with me.

In the Bible when God talked directly to people, there was something big going down. I don't think I want that kind of responsibility to be the father of a nation or take down the enemies of God's people or build a massive temple or something.

When God doesn't tell me anything directly, I just live my life. I got the Bible, I got my pastor, I got my church. Life is good, and quite navigable with the guides I have been given.

If I ever had a situation where God had to step in and talk to me like he talked to Moses, I think I would not like to have that kind of pressure.

 

[Lanolin]

OP Sounds like you aren't a Christian then, you don't believe in God, why would He talk to you?

Who is Jesus to you then?

Are you Jewish?

I am not sure why you come on here, saying you going to kill yourself if God doesn't talk to you. God already sent his son so He could talk to us. People crucified him.

According to the Bible, he came to life again after 3 days and is now in heaven. He ain't talking to you in a loud voice. He's sending you his Spirit but only if you believe and ask for Him can you receive.

I wish could explain it better but its not by going to church you become a christian or demanding God give you money and a husband who funds your life so you don't have to lift a finger. Sorry that's just not the way it works.

Think about what you have TODAY not tomorrow or in 10 years or whatever. I am very thankful that today, I get to breathe, I get to sleep in a bed with a roof over my head, have clothes and I have food.

Some people do not even have that, they are starving, and they are cold and they are homeless. If you are on a computer and typing this right now, it means hooray you are alive, and rich enough to afford to go online or access to a computer, and you can read, and all these other things that it seems you are taking for granted.

I am not typing these things to be mean. We Christians care about you. I'm sorry that I can't marry you or fund your imaginary married life. For one thing, I'm not husband material lol. I'm female. And the other thing. I don't have money to just give to a stranger who says she got dumped. I don't even know you that well.

Now how about you find some thread that you can join to get to know us better and find yourself some friends. That's what I would do. Because we've all been where you are, had our hearts broken and maybe our youthful dreams dashed or been abused in some way. But we find reasons to live and joy in life. You will too.

OK?

Nobody is saying you have to be a super Christian here. You just need to be open, and seek Jesus and he will come to you I promise. And you know your dumper ex ..well God will avenge those who break peoples hearts you won't need to worry about him anymore.

 

[Churchgoer]

I work 40 hours per week, do all my housework and yardwork, have time for hobbies and friends and posting on cc and church stuff.

And when I was 20 I thought that would be a miserable meaningless fate, but I find that the stability and routine are good for me.

But when it comes to meaning and passion in life, it almost all comes from interpersonal connections (even if those people are animals that need extra love and care and patience)

These days (I'm 44 now), my dog is essential companionship (my mom says I turned all my maternal instinct into caring for dog) but also limits me as she's got reactivity issues which means she can't be left in a kennel or cared for by a stranger. And the big faith and mental health challenge is to believe God has good things for the future when all that seems certain is that my dog will die, my parents will die, and I will decline and become less physically capable and not know who I can turn to for help. If someone had explained to me that this is where life ends up when you don't have a spouse and children back when I was 20 I don't know if I would have listened, but I know they would have done right by me by telling me about the reality.

Last 3 month I have family stayed with me. A lot of extra work. I love my family, but home alone time is very sweet too .

 

[SadGotDumped]

Heh... I'm glad God has NOT done that with me.

In the Bible when God talked directly to people, there was something big going down. I don't think I want that kind of responsibility to be the father of a nation or take down the enemies of God's people or build a massive temple or something.

When God doesn't tell me anything directly, I just live my life. I got the Bible, I got my pastor, I got my church. Life is good, and quite navigable with the guides I have been given.

If I ever had a situation where God had to step in and talk to me like he talked to Moses, I think I would not like to have that kind of pressure.

but WHY does there have to be "something big". WHY there is no reason for God to act like my Aunt Anne and only call when someone is dying. He is supposed to be a friend!!! Why does him talking to me have to come will all these rules. He has all the time in the world. Why can't he say Hi?!? I feel like no one can answer that, and thank everyone for your attempts but I feel like everyone is skirting around the main issue. Why can't he talk to people who want hear from him normally? Why does it have to be through all this mist. It makes me feel like it is all fake.

 

[cinder]

Honestly, you sound like you need to talk to a professional counselor and pronto. Do you have a church community at all? That's how God likes to work, through other people.

Have a good cry, speaker at church last sunday said that God designed it so that your body can release stress hormones (and who knows what else) through your tears which I thought was pretty cool and not something I'd heard before.

Anyway, I'm prone to turn hard into logic and neglect emotion so I'll stop the logical line of questioning abd just pray that God would grant you the serenity to accept the things you cannot change, the courage to change the things you can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

 

[Churchgoer]

God is not our butler. He is the one create heaven earth, and us.

We either obey God as our Lord, or not.

The choice is there.

 

[SadGotDumped]

OP Sounds like you aren't a Christian then, you don't believe in God, why would He talk to you?

Who is Jesus to you then?

Are you Jewish?

I am not sure why you come on here, saying you going to kill yourself if God doesn't talk to you. God already sent his son so He could talk to us. People crucified him.

According to the Bible, he came to life again after 3 days and is now in heaven. He ain't talking to you in a loud voice. He's sending you his Spirit but only if you believe and ask for Him can you receive.

I wish could explain it better but its not by going to church you become a christian or demanding God give you money and a husband who funds your life so you don't have to lift a finger. Sorry that's just not the way it works.

Think about what you have TODAY not tomorrow or in 10 years or whatever. I am very thankful that today, I get to breathe, I get to sleep in a bed with a roof over my head, have clothes and I have food.

Some people do not even have that, they are starving, and they are cold and they are homeless. If you are on a computer and typing this right now, it means hooray you are alive, and rich enough to afford to go online or access to a computer, and you can read, and all these other things that it seems you are taking for granted.

I am not typing these things to be mean. We Christians care about you. I'm sorry that I can't marry you or fund your imaginary married life. For one thing, I'm not husband material lol. I'm female. And the other thing. I don't have money to just give to a stranger who says she got dumped. I don't even know you that well.

Now how about you find some thread that you can join to get to know us better and find yourself some friends. That's what I would do. Because we've all been where you are, had our hearts broken and maybe our youthful dreams dashed or been abused in some way. But we find reasons to live and joy in life. You will too.

OK?

Nobody is saying you have to be a super Christian here. You just need to be open, and seek Jesus and he will come to you I promise. And you know your dumper ex ..well God will avenge those who break peoples hearts you won't need to worry about him anymore.

I do believe in God (Jesus) . Or at least I did. I was saved at 12 after my first suicide attempt. I felt like He saved me, I read the full Bible, went to church and felt a real connection, but then I realized I only felt him when I was super sad, or at church where its their job to make you feel him, or when I'm cold. Like we all have friends who only text us when we text them. That feels bad.

I don't want to demand God to give me my dream life, or even a good life. But to say Hi, so I know I am living for a reason. If it sucks its for a reason, and not because maybe he exists and I am bettering his kingdom by also existing. How do I even know if my existence matters to the kingdom? If I am contributing anything at all. If I am going to live a horrible life, but God told me too because its for a greater purpose I would. But why do it for no reason?

I don't enjoy today. I hate breathing. I wish I could die and give my life to a cancer patient or a miscarried baby that was desired. If I couldn't read and was homeless and couldn't have a computer but knew it was for the kingdom. I could be more willing.

You're funny for talking about being sorry you can't marry me. That made me feel better.

I have friends, I just didn't want them to know all this. They are Christan and I feel like if they hear my doubts they won't trust me as much anymore.

Nothing else besides my ex, my friends, and God made me happy, and I spend a small minority of my life with them. Now my ex is gone too. So I got two things left. I just can't find a reason to live other than God and my best friend. My best friend will probably leave me just like everything good I "idolize" or somethin, and God doesn't talk to me.

Yeah I'll try not to worry about my ex.

 

[SadGotDumped]

God is not our butler. He is the one create heaven earth, and us.

We either obey God as our Lord, or not.

The choice is there.

How can I obey with no instructions?

Last 3 month I have family stayed with me. A lot of extra work. I love my family, but home alone time is very sweet too .

I don't have family I enjoy being around. but I am glad you do

 

[SadGotDumped]

Honestly, you sound like you need to talk to a professional counselor and pronto. Do you have a church community at all? That's how God likes to work, through other people.

Have a good cry, speaker at church last sunday said that God designed it so that your body can release stress hormones (and who knows what else) through your tears which I thought was pretty cool and not something I'd heard before.

Anyway, I'm prone to turn hard into logic and neglect emotion so I'll stop the logical line of questioning abd just pray that God would grant you the serenity to accept the things you cannot change, the courage to change the things you can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

I used to go to church but that's what I mean about the other people thing. Why must he work through other people? It seems like he does everything in a way that makes it easy to fake. I can't trust anyone but God will only talk to me through people.

I did cry, a lot. But it just gets worse

Thank you.

 

[Lanolin]

Ok here's the thing

Ice cream

I know the cliche is if a girl is dumped, she's gonna go to the fridge and console herself by eating a whole tub of icecream until she's sick. The sugar in the ice cream will make her feel better, like a comfort food. Maybe it's cookies and creams I don't know

But I definitely know thats what some girls do/have done

Another thing that's healing is crying. And if angry, maybe throwing some pillows around. Or...lip synching to ALL BY MYSELF

If you living with your mum, why can't you go to her? Maybe she's got problems of her own I don't know.

Well anyway let it out to your Agony Aunties on CC. It's ok. Just don't kill yourself as being dumped is a totally stupid thing to kill yourself over. Go to the kitchen. find yourself some ice-cream or other comfort food, and maybe a pillow to hug.

Do you know any good songs?

As a Christian we just comfort others they way Jesus comforted those who were lost and abandoned, and He did this by feeding them. Or maybe giving them hugs, or saying kind things. We are His hands and feet. Yes we can't physically see Him, right now as he's not in the flesh but He's spirit. You need to understand this. He came in the flesh in the form of Jesus. Jesus knew all about what it was like to get dumped. I mean nobody wanted to marry him. He was a pariah in his home town.

He didn't have rich lifestyle, in fact, most of the wealthy people hated him.

 

[SadGotDumped]

I'm sorry if I have frustrated or offended anyone. I don't want to be hateful. I am being a tad selfish shoving all my anger onto other people but I don't know what to do. I don't want to do this to my friends of course but I can't keep it inside. I wish I could talk to God.

Everyone seems to be misunderstanding.
I'm not asking God give me a good life. It is what I want but I get that's not promised or even deserved.

I am asking for a conversation. Even a Hello. Just a sipit of proof that my life, no matter how terrible, is for a greater good.

Also hopefully that he loves me and that I won't be misserable. But i'm not really asking Him for that.

I'm saying if I get zero guidence from Him, I might as well try my hardest not to be miserable, even if that means ending my life.

Thank you guys so much for your responses! So sorry for any negitive emotions I have causes or will continue to cause with future replys

 

[SadGotDumped]

Ok here's the thing

Ice cream

I know the cliche is if a girl is dumped, she's gonna go to the fridge and console herself by eating a whole tub of icecream until she's sick. The sugar in the ice cream will make her feel better, like a comfort food. Maybe it's cookies and creams I don't know

But I definitely know thats what some girls do/have done

Another thing that's healing is crying. And if angry, maybe throwing some pillows around. Or...lip synching to ALL BY MYSELF

If you living with your mum, why can't you go to her? Maybe she's got problems of her own I don't know.

Well anyway let it out to your Agony Aunties on CC. It's ok. Just don't kill yourself as being dumped is a totally stupid thing to kill yourself over. Go to the kitchen. find yourself some ice-cream or other comfort food, and maybe a pillow to hug.

Do you know any good songs?

As a Christian we just comfort others they way Jesus comforted those who were lost and abandoned, and He did this by feeding them. Or maybe giving them hugs, or saying kind things. We are His hands and feet. Yes we can't physically see Him, right now as he's not in the flesh but He's spirit. You need to understand this. He came in the flesh in the form of Jesus. Jesus knew all about what it was like to get dumped. I mean nobody wanted to marry him. He was a pariah in his home town.

He didn't have rich lifestyle, in fact, most of the wealthy people hated him.

I can't eat ice cream. I have PCOS, no sugar, doctors orders. Also I need to lose weight so no binging for me sadly.

My mother hates me..

I don't want to kill myself because I was dumped by my ex, but because I lost the life I had always wanted and all I am left is with uncertainty and silence.

I don't need to be rich. I want to be rich. But I just really wanted to know any suffering I am facing is for the greater good and not for no reason.