Here Goes Nothing

[EcarG]

I am not sure why I am doing this, ,I have already been forgiven through Jesus, but for some reason I need to say it or confess it to everyone. People I have never met people I don't know because I just haven't ever told any one single person. I always hear people talk about being hurt or abused or betrayed and how we need to forgive and let go. My situation is the exact oppisite, I am the hurter, the betrayer, .yes of course I have been hurt to, I was adopted by a wonderful family and have pretty much dissapointed them at every turn, I stole, I have stolen from every single one of them. I have bad mouthed them,lied and taken advantage! My best friend, who always looks to me for comfort, I stole over 500 dollars from her, I slept with her boyfriends, I even slept wirh her. When I got married I wasnt even in love with him. I had an affair too. I lied about everything, I lied to everyone. So three years ago I started having panic attacks ..I have shut myself away from everything and I literaly sit in a room all day, 4 months ago I was saved and I am struggling to feel worthy of God and his goodness. I want so badly to believe that it isn't too late for me, but even as I write this I have a broken heart I am ashamed of myself.

 

[shemaiah]

Listen to this song Forgiven by Sanctus Real>>> Sanctus Real - Forgiven - YouTube

 

[EcarG]

Wow that's an amazing song, I still have tears. .thank you so much for sharing

 

[BADDOG]

in one part of the bible it talks about running the race ,,,,
its never about where you start in the race or even where you are in the middle of the race but its all about where you are at the end ,,, so run the best race you can from now on

God bless you

 

[rodogg]

I am not sure why I am doing this, ,I have already been forgiven through Jesus, but for some reason I need to say it or confess it to everyone. People I have never met people I don't know because I just haven't ever told any one single person. I always hear people talk about being hurt or abused or betrayed and how we need to forgive and let go. My situation is the exact oppisite, I am the hurter, the betrayer, .yes of course I have been hurt to, I was adopted by a wonderful family and have pretty much dissapointed them at every turn, I stole, I have stolen from every single one of them. I have bad mouthed them,lied and taken advantage! My best friend, who always looks to me for comfort, I stole over 500 dollars from her, I slept with her boyfriends, I even slept wirh her. When I got married I wasnt even in love with him. I had an affair too. I lied about everything, I lied to everyone. So three years ago I started having panic attacks ..I have shut myself away from everything and I literaly sit in a room all day, 4 months ago I was saved and I am struggling to feel worthy of God and his goodness. I want so badly to believe that it isn't too late for me, but even as I write this I have a broken heart I am ashamed of myself.

It's never too late. You have just begun a journey that won't be easy, but if you abandon yourself into Jesus' arms, eventually, you'll get there.

 

[shekaniah]

EcarG,

We all have been on a journey, some people got lucky and were blessed from the begining. Some of us had it hard from the start.
I was born into a life of darkness, my parents were very lost. God place me in His care through other people.
I turned my back on God for awhile in my teens...we have all sinned...we have all fallen short of His glory.
Rom.5:20, “Where Sin Abounds, Grace Abounds Much more"
The bigger the forgiveness...the more greatful we should be...
Luke 7:47, Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven--for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little."
You can turn this around by thanking God for the fact that you are saved by grace through faith!
Ephesians 2:8 & 9, For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God--not by works, so that no one can boast.

Don't let the god of this world lie to you...if you confess your sins He is faithful and just to forgive you from all unrightousness.

1 John 1:9, If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

You should be celabrating!!! You have been reborn!!!

 

[EcarG]

Thank you everyone! It feels great to hear it. Now I have to work on forgiving myself, which is proving more difficult than I imagined. Bu nothing is impossible through Christ

 

[Kyouken]

Bu nothing is impossible through Christ

Amen to that! EcarG, your confession here, it touched my heart. It gives me courage so that I may swallow my own pride and admit the things that I have done! God bless you!

Now I have to work on forgiving myself, which is proving more difficult than I imagined.

A verse for you! 1 John 3:20 - "For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things."

 

[Siberian_Khatru]

Thank you everyone! It feels great to hear it. Now I have to work on forgiving myself, which is proving more difficult than I imagined. Bu nothing is impossible through Christ

You may come to learn that doing this is harder than forgiving others; at least, that's been the case with me. And as for your first post, the Bible states: "Whoever acknowledges me before men, I will also acknowledge him before my Father in heaven." - Mathew 10:32 I believe.

Best of luck on your walk, and you always have a community here to turn to in times of need.

Best regards!

 

[Cabbage]

Charles Stanley wrote a book called "The Gift of Forgiveness" that is amazing!





Ephesians 2:10 "You are God's Masterpiece"
Isaiah 40:31 "You are an eagle not a chicken"

 

[Jordache]

Shame is a killer. About a month ago i confessed something i knew i was taking to my death bed. When i was a child (though there was a large age difference) i abuses another child. At the time i had no clue what i was doing to myself or that child. No one had ever explained it to me. All throughout my childhood my mom made sure I knew that many times the abused become the abusers. So I grew up terrified that though I'd been so traumatized by my parents abuse and I absolutely hated it I was going to end up a child molester. I was haunted by thoughts that the enemy planted in my head that I knew were wrong, were horrific to me, but were also not coming from me. It was until I confessed what had happened that I was freed from having to live with that fear. In confession I realized that those thoughts were not me. They were only what the enemy wanted to try and convince me I was.
So how does this relate? Confess to a real live person, face to face. It's to easy to hide on the Internet. Then start from today. Tomorrow start from tomorrow. Each day is a new day. God forgives you, but there are still consequences to your sin. However, even in the consequences His grace pulls you through. There is reconciliation to be done. God will give you the words and the timing...
But for now stand on the truth and find someone to pray through the shame with you. Pray it off of you.

 

[Avidan]

God's Word to stand on:

[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Isa 41:10 Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
Isa 41:11 Behold, all they that were incensed against thee shall be ashamed and confounded: they shall be as nothing; and they that strive with thee shall perish.
Isa 41:12 Thou shalt seek them, and shalt not find them, even them that contended with thee: they that war against thee shall be as nothing, and as a thing of nought.
Isa 41:13 For I the LORD thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.

Isa 54:17 No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, and their righteousness is of me, saith the LORD.

Jer 33:14 Behold, the days come, saith the LORD, that I will perform that good thing which I have promised unto the house of Israel and to the house of Judah.
Jer 33:15 In those days, and at that time, will I cause the Branch of righteousness to grow up unto David; and he shall execute judgment and righteousness in the land.
Jer 33:16 In those days shall Judah be saved, and Jerusalem shall dwell safely: and this is the name wherewith she shall be called, The LORD our righteousness.

Rom 2:28 For he is not a Jew, which is one outwardly; neither is that circumcision, which is outward in the flesh:
Rom 2:29 But he is a Jew, which is one inwardly; and circumcision is that of the heart, in the spirit, and not in the letter; whose praise is not of men, but of God.[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]
[/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]Heb 4:12 For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.
[/FONT]


(The Word of God separates our heart from the spirit of the world. It circumcises our heart. You will see this happen as you declare God's Word as your identity, that you are a join-heir with Christ, and you are the righteousness of God in Him.)



[FONT=Arial, sans-serif]2Co 5:17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
2Co 5:18 And all things are of God, who hath reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ, and hath given to us the ministry of reconciliation;
2Co 5:19 To wit, that God was in Christ, reconciling the world unto himself, not imputing their trespasses unto them; and hath committed unto us the word of reconciliation.
2Co 5:20 Now then we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God did beseech you by us: we pray you in Christ's stead, be ye reconciled to God.
2Co 5:21 For he hath made him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in him.

Rom 8:33 Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth. [/FONT]

Rom 8:34 Who is he that condemneth? It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us.
Rom 8:35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?
Rom 8:36 As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.
Rom 8:37 Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us.
Rom 8:38 For I am persuaded [assured], that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
Rom 8:39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Psa 138:7 Though I walk in the midst of trouble, thou wilt revive me: thou shalt stretch forth thine hand against the wrath of mine enemies, and thy right hand shall save me.
Psa 138:8 The LORD will perfect that which concerneth me: thy mercy, O LORD, endureth for ever: forsake not the works of thine own hands.

Psa 118:17 I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the LORD.


Training on battling temptation:

. http://christianchat.com/christian-teens-forum/34691-encouragement.html#post598988


The Blood of Christ makes us a new creation:

. http://christianchat.com/bible-discussion-forum/34002-why-not-believe-gospel-change.html#post599403










.

 

[EcarG]

@Jordache. I haven't ever told anyone and the people I did those things to, they don't know either, I am afraid if I tell my family and friends ,they won't ever speak to me again!

 

[Toadman]

I have lived a life very much like yoours. Hurting manhy others. I was saved almost a year ago when the holy spirit talked to me.

I almost fell into the devils trap. i started thinking "How do i forgive myself months later"? Is it possible? I even talked with my pastor and church elder about the topic.

I/we came to the conclusion that you can not forgive yourself. It is the devil and pride thinking you can contol your past transgressions. He wants you to think bad about yourself agin so you can fall from gods grace AGAIN! Jesus has paid for your sins! Lay all your guild and shame onthe cross to him. He will take it all. If people have been hurt and you need to ask for their forgiveness, then do it.If things you have done will bring new hurt to others I don't think god wants us to do it. You are hurting. Turn it over to god, learn from it and walk with him.

You know the phrase "forgive but not forgets"

It's the "not forgetting" that is driving you crazy. It does to me too.
THIS REALLY HELPS ME>>>>>>instead of remembering and fealing down, sad, guilty, shamed, etc. (which will turn you from god)
THINK THIS WAY>>>>>>>>>Thank you lord for taking all my pain and sin, my memories, though terrible, are a blessing that shows me just what you have done for me. My memories help me glorify your name and give you praise.

Turn your guilt and shame into thanks for the lord
PRAISE GOD!!!!!

 

[Brandon777]

You say you are struggling to feel worthy of God and His goodness. Great!!! Then you have the right attitude. The Holy Scriptures tell us that we are all unworthy of God's goodness He shows to us! Romans 3:10 as it is written: “None is righteous, no, not one" That exemplifies how much more wonderful He is than us. 2 Corinthians 12:9 "He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Most gladly therefore I will rather glory in my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may rest on me." The only good we have comes from Him. James 1:17 "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." But this verse you will be most happy with. Romans 8:1 "So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus." No condemnation. That means no shame can be added to your name as long as Christ is your friend and chooses to forgive you. Nothing else matters. And to rap it up. 1 Peter 2:9 "But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light."

 

[Stina1990]

Listen to this song Forgiven by Sanctus Real>>> Sanctus Real - Forgiven - YouTube

thanks for sharing this song, After i read OP's testimony it reminded me of exactly how i feel about myself sometimes and I really empathized with her, and then i heard the song and out came the tears. So God bless you both!

 

[Calmador]

I am not sure why I am doing this, ,I have already been forgiven through Jesus, but for some reason I need to say it or confess it to everyone. People I have never met people I don't know because I just haven't ever told any one single person. I always hear people talk about being hurt or abused or betrayed and how we need to forgive and let go. My situation is the exact oppisite, I am the hurter, the betrayer, .yes of course I have been hurt to, I was adopted by a wonderful family and have pretty much dissapointed them at every turn, I stole, I have stolen from every single one of them. I have bad mouthed them,lied and taken advantage! My best friend, who always looks to me for comfort, I stole over 500 dollars from her, I slept with her boyfriends, I even slept wirh her. When I got married I wasnt even in love with him. I had an affair too. I lied about everything, I lied to everyone. So three years ago I started having panic attacks ..I have shut myself away from everything and I literaly sit in a room all day, 4 months ago I was saved and I am struggling to feel worthy of God and his goodness. I want so badly to believe that it isn't too late for me, but even as I write this I have a broken heart I am ashamed of myself.

That's why his God, the word of God says... through Jesus Christ, we can be forgiven of ALL sin. ALL sin. ALL sin. Accept it, and now pray always, read the Bible, go to church, live for God. Remember the things I just said, prayer, read the Bible, go to church, doesnt save you but again, through Jesus Christ we are forgiven ALL sin. The prayer, reading bible and Church is to help you stay in better and better connection with God, its what he can work through. God Bless (hugs) trust him, he saved my life from hell, literally and in life-style, similair to your story.

 

[Bobbyking]

@Jordache. I haven't ever told anyone and the people I did those things to, they don't know either, I am afraid if I tell my family and friends ,they won't ever speak to me again!

Hi

If you have truly asked God for forgiveness, then He has already forgiven you. And you are indeed set free from your sins.

But if you want to be set free from doing these sins, then you must GIVE UP on these activities. God will give you strength and grace to overcome them, but YOU through an act of your will, must be willing to let go of them.

In any case, PRESS ON and as the Bible says, [FONT=Arial, Helvetica]'continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. (Phil. 2:12,13)[/FONT]

 

[Carmy]

EcarG I would like to add more to what other's have posted. You've gotten great replies and I love that song also.

If you go to www.love.com, you can listen to Christian radio online. That may bless you daily.

One of the main messages that is tought to us in the bible is Love. That wasn't done accidentally. Our first and greatest commandment is;
Mar 12:30 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment.

If God commands us to love Him first, think about how much more God loves you also. You were created by God on purpose. The devil tries to destroy us, but God drew your heart to His for a reason....He loves you and He has chosen you.

The bible tells us that:
Joh 15:16 Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you.
Rom 8:38 For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come,
Rom 8:39 Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Eph 2:1 And you hath he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins;
Eph 2:2 Wherein in time past ye walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience:
Eph 2:3 Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others.
Eph 2:4 But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us,
Eph 2:5 Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved)
Eph 2:6 And hath raised us up together, and made us sit together in heavenly places in Christ Jesus:
Eph 2:7 That in the ages to come he might shew the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness toward us through Christ Jesus.
Eph 2:8 For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:
Eph 2:9 Not of works, lest any man should boast.
Eph 2:10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them.

See how much God loves you? You were once dead in sin but now you are saved by God's grace. That is love. God's arms are opened wide and when we sin, we are forgiven. When we fall, He picks up up again and takes us into His arms of love and holds us close to Him, wrapping us in His arms of love. God saw all of your sin, then he forgave you for each and every one of them. I don't know why we continue to beat ourselves up when God has forgiven us but we tend to do that sometimes. Now, just read scriptures and search love in the scriptures. The more you read about how much God loves you, the more you will be able to believe it and accept it.

 

[missionvision]

Hello Carmy,I love the words that you have writen in your profile.Since I love God and serve Him,It was encouraging for me.
Thanks