I Can't Do This Anymore.

[LovesBrokenDream]

It's been going on since 8th grade. My dad's the one that started it. He started telling me I'm not pretty. He started telling me to lose weight. He started telling me I was stupid and that I won't get anywhere in life. I think he's gotten tired of most of those now. He's moved past that . . moved to telling me that I'm a burden and an inconvenience . . that I'm a cruel and prejudiced person . . that I'm a disappointment. I don't know what I did. My whole life I've tried not to disappoint my parents, but somewhere along the line, I did it anyways. My mom doesn't say much. She just stands there and watches. She'll tell me after it's over that she knows what he says is wrong. But she still just stands there and watches me take it.

It sucks being rejected by your family. :/

 

[Grey]

There is a difference between disappointing your family, and your family verbally abusing you. It sounds like your Dad likes to bully people. We should probably pity him.

 

[MissCris]

When someone is verbally abusive towards you, the poison they spew is very rarely anything to do with you at all, regardless of what they say. It's a problem with them, inside. I know that doesn't make your father's words hurt any less, but it may help you get through it to understand that it's not your fault at all.

Also, your family hasn't rejected you, it sounds like they've rejected God. Please don't let THEIR lack of faith drag YOU down.

I'll be praying for you, and for your parents. I truly hope things get better for all of you.

 

[JustinFoundChrist]

You shouldn't be down because of what your dad is saying to you. He probably has something going on in his life. Anyways, you are perfect. Nothing is wrong about you. Your doing just fine the way you are. As for your mom staying quiet, she just doesn't want to start a fight. Always know that Jesus loves you and will help you through anything in your life.

 

[HolyGirlGodLuvr]

Sadly my friend the devil gets to everyone. Even our own parents. It's like the more faith you have the more the devil will pretty much posses ANYONE to try and get you angry and miserable just like whoever it is that allowed him in. Keep your faith. Remember that GOD is stronger than anyone!! So keep praying. God hasn't forgotten about you. He knows what you're going through and he will help you.

I know it's hard to hear that from your own parents. But like the girl above said they've rejected GOD. Your mom doesn't want to say anything to your father SHE fears HE will leave her. Your dad must have superficial things that your mom is solely with him for. Whether those superficial things be money, car, clothes, jewelry etc....or maybe the fact that she doesn't have to work? I dunno whatever it may be, but your mom doesn't want to lose that. Now if they were equally yoked (as it says so in the Bible) then you wouldn't be having this problem.

My advice to you is keep praying that GOD strengthens you from this and that you can't be hurt by his words anymore. Ask GOD to allow you to handle things the mature way1

<3
God bless!

 

[barukhmalachi]

That can affect you and your future family badly if you let that set in your mind. I'm a father with three girls. I would never do that to them. My wife is still affected by family rejection as a kid. It will leave a void in your life that will have a longing to fill. Its easy to say be strong and don't let it hurt you but it ain't that simple. Draw closer to god everyday and look at his promises for you and what god says you are. Once you become a christian you are a child of the most high god. Fill those voids with god. You will always desire that approval from your parents but you can't change them. God can. The power of life and death are in the tongue and I know you feel like you die inside a little more with every harsh word. God has set you free and given you life. Everyone copes different but remember you are a child of god first and foremost and he is love. Your parents can't give you what they dont have. Be encouraged, continue to be an example of what god can do. The ones who have the greatest hardships have the greatest testimony. The victory shall be yours in jesus name._

 

[BrittanyJones]

*HUGS* That's major, major abuse. Abuse is so hard take, don't expect to be able to deal with it on your own, no one can, even if they like to say they can. Jesus can majorly heal the mind! I am glad that you have called upon Him to help. He will be your ever present help in times of trouble.


Jeremiah 29
For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. 12 Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart. 14 I will be found by you, says the LORD, and I will bring you back from your captivity; I will gather you from all the nations and from all the places where I have driven you, says the LORD, and I will bring you to the place from which I cause you to be carried away captive.

 

[LovesBrokenDream]

I know it's hard to hear that from your own parents. But like the girl above said they've rejected GOD. Your mom doesn't want to say anything to your father SHE fears HE will leave her. Your dad must have superficial things that your mom is solely with him for. Whether those superficial things be money, car, clothes, jewelry etc....or maybe the fact that she doesn't have to work?

The weird thing is . . there's not anything. My dad got really sick a year ago, and he can't even walk now. No, that's not the reason for his attitude. A lot of people seem to think that, but it went on for years before that. At this point, I think she knows it would be cruel to leave him when he's incapable of taking care of himself. But, before that . . I dunno.

Abuse is so hard take, don't expect to be able to deal with it on your own, no one can, even if they like to say they can.

It's funny that you say that. I've always been the girl that tried to deal with it on my own. I've always been the type that never let anyone in to see the scars. Jesus has been my saving grace, and it's Him alone that has helped me see that it's okay to ask for help from others.

 

[GOD_IS_LOVE]

"Do not be overcome by evil but overcome evil with good." Pray for them. xoxo

 

[asd101]

Hey God loves you just the way that you are!!! Remember that!!! Don't take to it!!! Don't believe it!!! Your Dad... is well... Not much of a father... So if you got prettier physically, smarter, and lost weight then he would love you??? That's not love!!!... Maybe you should have a long discussion with your Dad about how you feel about his criticism and that its not right!!

Here is a little verse... I'm glad you found God and you are sticking to Him!!!

Psalm 27: 10When my father and my mother forsake me, then the LORD will take me up.

Also pray for you father and your mother!!! Remember when all is said and done... To always remember to be forgiving!!! !!! Hope this helped!!!

 

[TheAristocat]

It's been going on since 8th grade. My dad's the one that started it. He started telling me I'm not pretty. He started telling me to lose weight. He started telling me I was stupid and that I won't get anywhere in life. I think he's gotten tired of most of those now. He's moved past that . . moved to telling me that I'm a burden and an inconvenience . . that I'm a cruel and prejudiced person . . that I'm a disappointment. I don't know what I did. My whole life I've tried not to disappoint my parents, but somewhere along the line, I did it anyways. My mom doesn't say much. She just stands there and watches. She'll tell me after it's over that she knows what he says is wrong. But she still just stands there and watches me take it.

It sucks being rejected by your family. :/

Nice profile pictures. Looks like you might have some Welsh in you.

 

[resurrection33]

It's been going on since 8th grade. My dad's the one that started it. He started telling me I'm not pretty. He started telling me to lose weight. He started telling me I was stupid and that I won't get anywhere in life. I think he's gotten tired of most of those now. He's moved past that . . moved to telling me that I'm a burden and an inconvenience . . that I'm a cruel and prejudiced person . . that I'm a disappointment. I don't know what I did. My whole life I've tried not to disappoint my parents, but somewhere along the line, I did it anyways. My mom doesn't say much. She just stands there and watches. She'll tell me after it's over that she knows what he says is wrong. But she still just stands there and watches me take it.

It sucks being rejected by your family. :/

Soon you will be free to leave your parents. You will need a good job so you can support yourself. However, a college education is very helfpul, and if your parents are willing to help pay for a college education, you might want to stick it out until you have your degree.

 

[LovesBrokenDream]

Nice profile pictures. Looks like you might have some Welsh in you.

Hahah, thank you! I might, but I'm not sure. I have a HUGE family. My mom's family is all in Europe, but she doesn't know all of them, and my mom's mom never met her parents. So, there definitely might be.

Soon you will be free to leave your parents. You will need a good job so you can support yourself. However, a college education is very helfpul, and if your parents are willing to help pay for a college education, you might want to stick it out until you have your degree.

Unfortunately, they're not helping me pay at all. I'm doing it on my own, but I'm still going to pray for a way. I know I need to get out of this toxic environment. If you could pray for that kind of door to be opened, I would be so grateful.

 

[Brandon777]

Yes. I agree that the best way to heal from this is to move out, talk to trustworthy friends about it and especially to pray to God for and about them and you. Getting close to God tends to solve a lot of problems in general though (Luke 12:31).

 

[supers]

You're very beautiful sweetheart. You have a very pretty smile and pretty eyes. Don't listen to the devil and remember you will receive double the happiness in the future from your troubles now.

 

[Bobbyking]

It's been going on since 8th grade. My dad's the one that started it. He started telling me I'm not pretty. He started telling me to lose weight. He started telling me I was stupid and that I won't get anywhere in life. I think he's gotten tired of most of those now. He's moved past that . . moved to telling me that I'm a burden and an inconvenience . . that I'm a cruel and prejudiced person . . that I'm a disappointment. I don't know what I did. My whole life I've tried not to disappoint my parents, but somewhere along the line, I did it anyways. My mom doesn't say much. She just stands there and watches. She'll tell me after it's over that she knows what he says is wrong. But she still just stands there and watches me take it.

It sucks being rejected by your family. :/

Hi

I have three daughters and the eldest is 17. I have told them that God's Word is the highest authority in the house and IF I as a father SAYS something to them that contradict the word, they have every right to bring it up and reject it. And if I still refuse to change for some reasons, they have every right to seek the pastor for help.

Hence if your dad continues to verbally abuse you, you should seek outside help. Approach a christian counsellor or pastor and relate the issue to them. DO NOT BE AFRAID.

That said, I also want to say something about your dad. He may have suffered the same treatment from his parents (I am only assuming here) and hence, he is doing it to his own children. However, whatever it is, you have every right not to take this abuse from him.

Rgds
Bob

 

[keysa]

It's been going on since 8th grade. My dad's the one that started it. He started telling me I'm not pretty. He started telling me to lose weight. He started telling me I was stupid and that I won't get anywhere in life. I think he's gotten tired of most of those now. He's moved past that . . moved to telling me that I'm a burden and an inconvenience . . that I'm a cruel and prejudiced person . . that I'm a disappointment. I don't know what I did. My whole life I've tried not to disappoint my parents, but somewhere along the line, I did it anyways. My mom doesn't say much. She justh stands there and watches. She'll tell me after it's over that she knows what he says is wrong. But she still just stands there and watches me take it.

It sucks being rejected by your family. :/

Like most, I do NOT believe in abuse. What I DO believe in is honor your father and mother, but PLEASE understand I'm not saying allow them to abuse you. Your father and mother have issues that are hurtful to you. It's not ok, but there's no easy answer...except prayer. I've been where you are and it took me YEARS to deal with the anger that festered. I'm sad that I couldn't let go of it sooner. Let me say again....what's happening is NOT ok. Pray and read God's Word and I pray God will show you how best to handle this. Once you're a little older, you may need to seek out a Christian counselor to help you put things into a healthy, Godly perspective. Please know that time will heal your wounds. That's probably not what you want to hear (I wouldn't have wanted to hear that myself when I was young). Just be cautious that you don't do as many women do and "marry" the equivalent of your father. Again, prayer and putting God first in your life will help with this. You might consider checking out Joyce Meyer online - her father molested her many times as a child and she's very open about how messed up her life was, but she forgave him. She and her husband moved him and her mom to live near her and she was good to him for a long time before he really acknowledged what she did. When he did, he apologized for what he'd done to her. While this situation is a little different than yours, it had an impact on her life that is similar to that of other forms of abuse. I'm not sure how helpful this is, but sometimes it helps just a little to know others have had similar experiences.

May God bless you as you live a Godly life, despite the hardships you're facing daily (and by the way, I believe these experiences helped shaped me in a positive way - through God...not the way you want things to be, but believe it or not, I'm now thankful for the difficulties I survived. I don't wish it on anyone and wouldn't want to go through it again - EVER, but I can now relate to others and probably have a gentler spirit as a result). I pray that your father and mother will recognize what they are doing to you and cease the abuse immediately. I pray that you will a light that reflects God's love for them and others in your life. I also pray that if nothing changes, doors will open so that you will be able to leave that situation. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

My heart goes out to you, as I know what you are living. It saddens me to know others must face this. Please know you are a TREASURE! Your weight, looks or anything external are simply not "who" you are. Yes, it is good to keep your weight down as part of health maintenance but it does NOT determine how good of a person you are, nor does it determine whether you are worthy of love. You are loved dearly by the Creator of this universe...the apple of His eye! You are also deeply loved by your brothers and sisters in Christ. When your dad begins his put-downs, quietly recite a favorite scripture so you can replace the evil that is being spoken by God's TRUTH. Truth is ONLY good. When you consider what is being said, remember it is NOT truth. God bless you always!

 

[LovesBrokenDream]

Hi

I have three daughters and the eldest is 17. I have told them that God's Word is the highest authority in the house and IF I as a father SAYS something to them that contradict the word, they have every right to bring it up and reject it. And if I still refuse to change for some reasons, they have every right to seek the pastor for help.

Hence if your dad continues to verbally abuse you, you should seek outside help. Approach a christian counsellor or pastor and relate the issue to them. DO NOT BE AFRAID.

That said, I also want to say something about your dad. He may have suffered the same treatment from his parents (I am only assuming here) and hence, he is doing it to his own children. However, whatever it is, you have every right not to take this abuse from him.

Rgds
Bob

I like your way of thinking, Bob. I'm definitely going to approach a Christian counselor. I'm working on scheduling some appointments right now. It took me way too long to suck it up and admit that I couldn't do it alone though.

Like most, I do NOT believe in abuse. What I DO believe in is honor your father and mother, but PLEASE understand I'm not saying allow them to abuse you. Your father and mother have issues that are hurtful to you. It's not ok, but there's no easy answer...except prayer. I've been where you are and it took me YEARS to deal with the anger that festered. I'm sad that I couldn't let go of it sooner. Let me say again....what's happening is NOT ok. Pray and read God's Word and I pray God will show you how best to handle this. Once you're a little older, you may need to seek out a Christian counselor to help you put things into a healthy, Godly perspective. Please know that time will heal your wounds. That's probably not what you want to hear (I wouldn't have wanted to hear that myself when I was young). Just be cautious that you don't do as many women do and "marry" the equivalent of your father. Again, prayer and putting God first in your life will help with this. You might consider checking out Joyce Meyer online - her father molested her many times as a child and she's very open about how messed up her life was, but she forgave him. She and her husband moved him and her mom to live near her and she was good to him for a long time before he really acknowledged what she did. When he did, he apologized for what he'd done to her. While this situation is a little different than yours, it had an impact on her life that is similar to that of other forms of abuse. I'm not sure how helpful this is, but sometimes it helps just a little to know others have had similar experiences.

May God bless you as you live a Godly life, despite the hardships you're facing daily (and by the way, I believe these experiences helped shaped me in a positive way - through God...not the way you want things to be, but believe it or not, I'm now thankful for the difficulties I survived. I don't wish it on anyone and wouldn't want to go through it again - EVER, but I can now relate to others and probably have a gentler spirit as a result). I pray that your father and mother will recognize what they are doing to you and cease the abuse immediately. I pray that you will a light that reflects God's love for them and others in your life. I also pray that if nothing changes, doors will open so that you will be able to leave that situation. In Jesus' Name, Amen!

My heart goes out to you, as I know what you are living. It saddens me to know others must face this. Please know you are a TREASURE! Your weight, looks or anything external are simply not "who" you are. Yes, it is good to keep your weight down as part of health maintenance but it does NOT determine how good of a person you are, nor does it determine whether you are worthy of love. You are loved dearly by the Creator of this universe...the apple of His eye! You are also deeply loved by your brothers and sisters in Christ. When your dad begins his put-downs, quietly recite a favorite scripture so you can replace the evil that is being spoken by God's TRUTH. Truth is ONLY good. When you consider what is being said, remember it is NOT truth. God bless you always!

This made my day! The things that you said resonated with me so much. I'm way too young to be married, but I know I've dated the equivalent of my father before. That didn't end well at all. Thank you so much for praying. You're right though; it does help to know that I'm not alone and I'm glad you reminded me of that truth.

 

[Crossfire]

It's been going on since 8th grade. My dad's the one that started it. He started telling me I'm not pretty. He started telling me to lose weight. He started telling me I was stupid and that I won't get anywhere in life. I think he's gotten tired of most of those now. He's moved past that . . moved to telling me that I'm a burden and an inconvenience . . that I'm a cruel and prejudiced person . . that I'm a disappointment. I don't know what I did. My whole life I've tried not to disappoint my parents, but somewhere along the line, I did it anyways. My mom doesn't say much. She just stands there and watches. She'll tell me after it's over that she knows what he says is wrong. But she still just stands there and watches me take it.

It sucks being rejected by your family. :/

Sweetheart,

I know exactly what you are going through. My father was in the military ( U.s. Army Ranger during Vietnam) when I was born and, due to certain complications, I was not born in 9 months but 10. This made my father believe I was not his. While my parents stayed together throughout my childhood, I had to endure my father's heavy drinking, his rants against me and at times physical abuse.

I can remember a time when I was your age, after my dad beat me worse than ever, when he passed out on our couch late one night I contemplated killing him thus once and for all putting him, my mother and our family out HIS misery. That's when the Lord intervined and spoke to me personally and told me that while my father on earth may not love me very much, that I had a father in heaven who loved me dearly and had plans for my life at the appointed time.

Here it is 20+ years later and you want to know what God plan for my life was / is? Working with young people like you who have been hurt physically, mentally and emotionally - introducing them to a father who will never leave them or forsake them, who cares about them, and who will remove all the pain and all the hate from their hearts and fill it with love and compassion - healing old wounds and using those scars to help others heal from fresh wounds.

I love you little sis but more importantly Jesus loves you. You're almost at the age when you can leave the nest and go out on your own. I pray that you won't make the same mistake I did. When I left home I walked away from God and got into some serious trouble. But God was there for me too and miraculously I came out unscathed. God is so awesome, I can't begin to describe in words.

Just know that He (Jesus) is with you and that He loves you and, in time, has a work for you to do. But before then He has to show you some things, teach you some things, that will transform your life. Put your faith and trust in Him and be determined that no matter how hard life might become that you will never walk away because he will never leave you, you just have to trust that through the hardship there is a lesson to be learned that will not only set you free but set others free as well.

You know what, it doesn't matter what the world thinks about you because it is the world that is a stench in the Lord's nostrils, decaying and dying from from selfishness and uncompassion.

But you my darling little sister are beautiful in the eyes of the Lord, a precious flower that in time blossom into a beautiful flower,, full of color, full of life and Divine majesty. Those are not my words but HIS. The words of your real Father in Heaven.

I know it's hard now and that sometimes it hard to see beyond your current situation however, God has this track record of using the weak, the hurting, everything the world calls foolish and He uses it for HIS GLORY. Stand firm in HIM for his strength (love, compassion, peace truth, etc.) is made perfect in our weakness.


HUGS....

 

[Calmador]

It's been going on since 8th grade. My dad's the one that started it. He started telling me I'm not pretty. He started telling me to lose weight. He started telling me I was stupid and that I won't get anywhere in life. I think he's gotten tired of most of those now. He's moved past that . . moved to telling me that I'm a burden and an inconvenience . . that I'm a cruel and prejudiced person . . that I'm a disappointment. I don't know what I did. My whole life I've tried not to disappoint my parents, but somewhere along the line, I did it anyways. My mom doesn't say much. She just stands there and watches. She'll tell me after it's over that she knows what he says is wrong. But she still just stands there and watches me take it.

It sucks being rejected by your family. :/

Hey angel look, your Dad just doesn't know how to treat you ok, do your best to ignore those bad things he says. Focus on God, Pray and ask your mom to talk to your Dad, she has a lot of influence on your Dad (hugs) Here for you ok? Message me =] God Bless