So here's the deal... I used to be very religious. I went to church all the time, and genuinely believed what I had been taught by my parents and church leaders about Christianity. I even frequented this site a lot. Over the past few years (I'm 20 - so since later high school, or around 17), I've started to have a lot of doubts about the religion as a whole, and I'm dating someone who is in pretty much the same position as me.
My parents are obviously not happy that I am losing faith in beliefs I once held very close. They are also unhappy that I am dating someone who is in the same position. They act like they don't care to get to know her, and are completely unsupportive, and that hurts. I know I am a younger adult, but I feel that I have a certain right to believe what I wish and have whatever partner I wish. With that being said, what I basically want to know is this: How do I get my parents to understand that I want and need advice and support, and that by constantly getting upset over my decisions they put me in a situation where it is very hard for me to be my own person? Additionally, on the dating front, I cannot date someone that my parents will not support a relationship with for an extended period of time. How do I express to them that I really need their support? If this relationship fails only because they are not willing to support me in it, I know I will bear a lot of resentment towards them. How can I avoid this? I've already tried to talk through this with them, but they will not let it go. I really feel like at my age, they should speak their advice a few times, but if it continues to be hurtful as they do it over and over and over, they should just let me make my own decisions while being supportive of me.
Any advice that anyone could offer from a more "religious" perspective would be helpful.
Caveat: If you can restrain yourselves, please do not respond with with attempts to get me to recommit myself more fully to Christianity. That's really not what I'm asking about; it's simply pertinent to the real question: the issue of my relationship with my parents.
Thanks.
My parents are obviously not happy that I am losing faith in beliefs I once held very close. They are also unhappy that I am dating someone who is in the same position. They act like they don't care to get to know her, and are completely unsupportive, and that hurts. I know I am a younger adult, but I feel that I have a certain right to believe what I wish and have whatever partner I wish. With that being said, what I basically want to know is this: How do I get my parents to understand that I want and need advice and support, and that by constantly getting upset over my decisions they put me in a situation where it is very hard for me to be my own person? Additionally, on the dating front, I cannot date someone that my parents will not support a relationship with for an extended period of time. How do I express to them that I really need their support? If this relationship fails only because they are not willing to support me in it, I know I will bear a lot of resentment towards them. How can I avoid this? I've already tried to talk through this with them, but they will not let it go. I really feel like at my age, they should speak their advice a few times, but if it continues to be hurtful as they do it over and over and over, they should just let me make my own decisions while being supportive of me.
Any advice that anyone could offer from a more "religious" perspective would be helpful.
Caveat: If you can restrain yourselves, please do not respond with with attempts to get me to recommit myself more fully to Christianity. That's really not what I'm asking about; it's simply pertinent to the real question: the issue of my relationship with my parents.
Thanks.