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1 PETER 3:4 - Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.
The title of this thread is probably the single best piece of advice my momma (Yes, we southern ladies say "Momma". It's a term of endearment to us.
) ever gave me when it comes to men. Ladies, how many of our friends have ever been upset about a thing and said something like this, "Well, I'm just gonna go home and tell him how it is!!" And then others will stay stuff like, "That's right girl! You tell him!" When I see/hear stuff like that (yep...I've even heard it in churches and on CC), I think....argggh...good luck with that.
First of all, ladies, do you really WANT a spineless man? Really??? Think about that and get back to me because that's what you'll have if you keep beating down his love for you with that sort of junk. Either that or a GONE man.
If you want a man, ANY MAN...let me say it again...ANY MAN to REEEEEEAAAAAALLLLLLLYYYY listen to you, remember this one.key.word: RESPECT. Why? Because:
1. Respect is important to men. They NEED it. If you don't get anything else out of this post, take that part with you. They need it so much that it's one of the two things God wants us to do for them; and
2. Men will NOT process or take to heart the words of a woman they do not respect. A little switch in their heads turns off the connection to their brains when a woman they have no respect for begins to speak, and all they hear is something akin to Charlie Brown's teacher. (a good thing to remember if you wanna throw a tantrum in the middle of a christian chatroom as well because the guys won't listen to you)
So, the next time you feel the itch to go tell your man how a thing is gonna be, consider these things first:
1. Is this really beneficial to our relationship or is my girlpower pride all swelled up and making me selfish? If it's selfish junk, don't take it to your man. If you have a godly man, he deserves better.
2. If it IS of value, pick.your.moment. Timing is key when it comes to men, IF you want them to actually hear you. Standing in front of the tv during the best moment of the game will not benefit your cause. When you have your man's time and full attention, why not start off softly with something like, "You know, baby, what do you think about....." ? What they hear when THOSE words hit their ears is that you respect what they think and they'll love you for it. Trust me on this.
Bottom line, if you want your man to BE a real man, be a lady for him. We know that Peter was a married man, so he knew what would be pleasing to God and of value to men in marriage firsthand. Think about Peter's wife for a minute if you will. This woman saw her husband drop his nets and follow after the Savior, and she supported him completely in this.
(Yes, Momma, I still hear your voice in my head sometimes. Thank God )
P.S. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know someone is going to, at some point, come at this with the whole abusive man thing, but, men who respect you, don't abuse you. I hope they read this far. Take your time and find one who DOES respect women, treasure his respect, and that won't be a problem for you. Head that junk off at the pass. If you meet a he-man, bad boy, "babygirl, sorry I hit you, but I'll NEVER do it again" type, RUN. Maybe if enough woman dump him rather than enable him, he'll figure out that getting some help with his issues is better than being alone.
The title of this thread is probably the single best piece of advice my momma (Yes, we southern ladies say "Momma". It's a term of endearment to us.
) ever gave me when it comes to men. Ladies, how many of our friends have ever been upset about a thing and said something like this, "Well, I'm just gonna go home and tell him how it is!!" And then others will stay stuff like, "That's right girl! You tell him!" When I see/hear stuff like that (yep...I've even heard it in churches and on CC), I think....argggh...good luck with that.First of all, ladies, do you really WANT a spineless man? Really??? Think about that and get back to me because that's what you'll have if you keep beating down his love for you with that sort of junk. Either that or a GONE man.
If you want a man, ANY MAN...let me say it again...ANY MAN to REEEEEEAAAAAALLLLLLLYYYY listen to you, remember this one.key.word: RESPECT. Why? Because:
1. Respect is important to men. They NEED it. If you don't get anything else out of this post, take that part with you. They need it so much that it's one of the two things God wants us to do for them; and
2. Men will NOT process or take to heart the words of a woman they do not respect. A little switch in their heads turns off the connection to their brains when a woman they have no respect for begins to speak, and all they hear is something akin to Charlie Brown's teacher. (a good thing to remember if you wanna throw a tantrum in the middle of a christian chatroom as well because the guys won't listen to you)
So, the next time you feel the itch to go tell your man how a thing is gonna be, consider these things first:
1. Is this really beneficial to our relationship or is my girlpower pride all swelled up and making me selfish? If it's selfish junk, don't take it to your man. If you have a godly man, he deserves better.
2. If it IS of value, pick.your.moment. Timing is key when it comes to men, IF you want them to actually hear you.
Standing in front of the tv during the best moment of the game will not benefit your cause. When you have your man's time and full attention, why not start off softly with something like, "You know, baby, what do you think about....." ? What they hear when THOSE words hit their ears is that you respect what they think and they'll love you for it. Trust me on this.Bottom line, if you want your man to BE a real man, be a lady for him. We know that Peter was a married man, so he knew what would be pleasing to God and of value to men in marriage firsthand. Think about Peter's wife for a minute if you will.
This woman saw her husband drop his nets and follow after the Savior, and she supported him completely in this. (Yes, Momma, I still hear your voice in my head sometimes. Thank God
)P.S. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know someone is going to, at some point, come at this with the whole abusive man thing, but, men who respect you, don't abuse you.
I hope they read this far. Take your time and find one who DOES respect women, treasure his respect, and that won't be a problem for you. Head that junk off at the pass. If you meet a he-man, bad boy, "babygirl, sorry I hit you, but I'll NEVER do it again" type, RUN. Maybe if enough woman dump him rather than enable him, he'll figure out that getting some help with his issues is better than being alone.
