Sad and disappointing Churches might seem nowadays but I don't think you're making yourself right by saying Church is not the place for you.
From what you've observed you can't find that in the Church I'm in. We are simple believers having a solemn service. We gather together for fellowship, prayer, hymnal singing accompanied by piano and guitar. We don't have a loud pastor simply because we don't have a pastor. Who feed us with the word of God? Well... we are so well fed. We do have our elders who explain the Scriptures better but all of us are encouraged to speak, believing each of us have different annointing, giving testimonies and sharing the word of God and then the bread and wine in the end that's how our normal Sunday service works.
Does this make the Church I'm in better than the others? I don't think so! We might not have all those that you've written but I can add even more negative observation to it. And the worst thing, division happened twice in the Church I'm in and what makes it even worst? My Mom who joined the other group when the 2nd division happened just recently. Should I get discouraged? Should I stop going to Church? Should I just locked myself in the room and just listen to all these sermons online?... NEVER!
I'll say those that you've mentioned are just minor prob in the churches and there are even deeper problem than that. And I don't even think a perfect simple church exist. If God showed you all those maybe He wanted you to do something on it not choosing to stay in your house instead. If you find a church where the teachings are purely based in the Bible then stay there, if the pastor is too loud I don't think it's disrespectful to ask a favor and say to lower the volume down. I seriously would do that if I happened to be in a church like that. If they won't listen, well... I'm persistent
and I'm sure there are a lot who would join my request too. God said, there's a lot of work to do in His field but only few workers I guess one reason for that is a lot of Christians chose to hide themselves in their house and that's even more disappointing.