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I'm pretty new here.. and if anyone has read any of my previous posts.. I spoke on my Christian Husband recently (past month) leaving me after 8 years of marriage.. .. no reason he gave.. except that he was a loner.. and the reality that approx 1 year after we married starting drinking, and I found out he was an alcoholic before we got married from his mom. (which I did not know when I married him) that was one thing we talked about previous to marriage, and he was not truthful.. although in all other areas.. he is a very honest man.. stating.. that he has always been a loaner.. and feels he is living a lie by being married.. telling me I am his best friend and he doesnt want to lose me but doesnt want to be married.??? then he got into smoking this fake pot stuff that makes you high.. So.... to lay this all out, and by the way I am not trying to speak negative of him.. I still love him.. and he is my friend.. but because of all that happened I question my own faith..and my concern for his spiritual well being, I need help.. , I will go on with my question...
Here is my confusion.. Jesus shed his blood for us... and by Grace we are saved.. nothing of ourselves.but his gift.. . Being he was my spiritual leader in the home.. at least in the beginning He would say once saved always saved.. covered by Grace.. Covered by Grace..so confident that everything was covered by Grace.. with no reverential fear as it looked on the surface.. So now a bit of confusion....Maybe just my reverential Fear.. or maybe alot of confusion.. But here goes.. Almost daily.. for some time.. he would get drunk and high. and say he is covered by Grace.. then when he said he didnt want to be married. he would say he was covered by Grace.. When I read things like:
Hebrews 10:29.... How much more severly do you think a man deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the covenant.. that sanctified him and who has insulted the Spirit of Grace.
and Hebrews 10:26.. If we deliberatley keep on sinning after we have recieved the knowledge of the truth, no sacrafice for sin is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God..
this concerns me.. to say Im saved by Grace.. and be able to choose to live your life mostly in the flesh.. .. and step away from going to church bible reading. at least what looks to be on the surface.. I would like to hope this is just a moment in his life.. and things might turn around.??? he previously.. was the most spiritual man I knew.. how does this happen??? AT the same time.. He never married till he was 40, and when we married. 8 years ago.. he is saying... he tried so hard to stick it out but he was meant to be a loner.. and points no blame on me.. .. maybe I am not confident that everything is covered.. ?????? should I be??? and if I should be then have I not accepted his Gift.. Cause he is overly confident. everything is covered.. he does have a conscience and there has been much tears on his part.. a man who never cried previously.. but I feel a bit lost these days.. Then I see scriptures like these.. :
Romasn 11:20-22 Granted, but they were broken off because of unbelief, and you stand by Faith. Do not be arrogant, but tremble. For if God did not spare the natural branches He will not spare you either.. Consider therefore kindness and sterness of God, sterness to those who fell, but kindess to you provided you continue in his kindness other wise you also will be cut off...
Ok in that scripture.. it starts talking about unbelief, but two words make me concerned....FELL... and CONTINUE.. or you also will be cut off???
And lastly.. the scripture 1st Corinthians 5:11 I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an Idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler, with such a man do not even eat.. Major confusion here... There is no adultry in this situation.. this is a loving man.. quiet. who drinks alot... Because he has chosen to leave.. where does that leave me.. Cause God hates divorce. If he is a Brother. as stated above and does this.. am I to abide by this scripture and "with such a man do not even eat" I am not perfect. far from it. but I did try to honor him, maybe I fell short.. But because his mom.. my example of a christian woman.. who I love and respect so much.. lived with her husband an alcoholic man who died from the alcohol.. there was a time.. I wanted out.. but because of her example.. and since the bible did not give a reason to divorce for alcoholism.. I had excepted..my lot in life.. to respect him and not leave him... knowing he was on a wrong path.and it may be a hard life.. . thinking.. if I was the wife in 1st peter.. I could bring him back.. Anyway.. I hope this doesnt sound like I am babbling. just trying to figure my life out.. in terms. of where I stand.. With God now.. and Gods expectations of me concerning my husband.. Please help.. A bit wounded here.. so hopefully noone will judge me on my lack of knowledge.. thank you so much..
Here is my confusion.. Jesus shed his blood for us... and by Grace we are saved.. nothing of ourselves.but his gift.. . Being he was my spiritual leader in the home.. at least in the beginning He would say once saved always saved.. covered by Grace.. Covered by Grace..so confident that everything was covered by Grace.. with no reverential fear as it looked on the surface.. So now a bit of confusion....Maybe just my reverential Fear.. or maybe alot of confusion.. But here goes.. Almost daily.. for some time.. he would get drunk and high. and say he is covered by Grace.. then when he said he didnt want to be married. he would say he was covered by Grace.. When I read things like:
Hebrews 10:29.... How much more severly do you think a man deserves to be punished who has trampled the Son of God underfoot, who has treated as an unholy thing the blood of the covenant.. that sanctified him and who has insulted the Spirit of Grace.
and Hebrews 10:26.. If we deliberatley keep on sinning after we have recieved the knowledge of the truth, no sacrafice for sin is left, but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God..
this concerns me.. to say Im saved by Grace.. and be able to choose to live your life mostly in the flesh.. .. and step away from going to church bible reading. at least what looks to be on the surface.. I would like to hope this is just a moment in his life.. and things might turn around.??? he previously.. was the most spiritual man I knew.. how does this happen??? AT the same time.. He never married till he was 40, and when we married. 8 years ago.. he is saying... he tried so hard to stick it out but he was meant to be a loner.. and points no blame on me.. .. maybe I am not confident that everything is covered.. ?????? should I be??? and if I should be then have I not accepted his Gift.. Cause he is overly confident. everything is covered.. he does have a conscience and there has been much tears on his part.. a man who never cried previously.. but I feel a bit lost these days.. Then I see scriptures like these.. :
Romasn 11:20-22 Granted, but they were broken off because of unbelief, and you stand by Faith. Do not be arrogant, but tremble. For if God did not spare the natural branches He will not spare you either.. Consider therefore kindness and sterness of God, sterness to those who fell, but kindess to you provided you continue in his kindness other wise you also will be cut off...
Ok in that scripture.. it starts talking about unbelief, but two words make me concerned....FELL... and CONTINUE.. or you also will be cut off???
And lastly.. the scripture 1st Corinthians 5:11 I am writing you that you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy, an Idolater or a slanderer, a drunkard or a swindler, with such a man do not even eat.. Major confusion here... There is no adultry in this situation.. this is a loving man.. quiet. who drinks alot... Because he has chosen to leave.. where does that leave me.. Cause God hates divorce. If he is a Brother. as stated above and does this.. am I to abide by this scripture and "with such a man do not even eat" I am not perfect. far from it. but I did try to honor him, maybe I fell short.. But because his mom.. my example of a christian woman.. who I love and respect so much.. lived with her husband an alcoholic man who died from the alcohol.. there was a time.. I wanted out.. but because of her example.. and since the bible did not give a reason to divorce for alcoholism.. I had excepted..my lot in life.. to respect him and not leave him... knowing he was on a wrong path.and it may be a hard life.. . thinking.. if I was the wife in 1st peter.. I could bring him back.. Anyway.. I hope this doesnt sound like I am babbling. just trying to figure my life out.. in terms. of where I stand.. With God now.. and Gods expectations of me concerning my husband.. Please help.. A bit wounded here.. so hopefully noone will judge me on my lack of knowledge.. thank you so much..
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