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Disclaimer: I know real life relationships can have deceptions too. I know deception isn't exclusive to online relationships. I know many Godly truthful successful relationships have been started online. I know that what I'm about to say won't prevent EVERY highly nuanced form of deception one may encounter in an online or real life relationship. This thread isn't meant for a detailed back and forth over the specifics of the Manti Te'o situation. Manti Te'o's situation is simply a point of reference to share my advice. I'm not declaring Manti Te'o guilty or not guilty of anything. I know there are more nuanced details to the story than I will list below.
Manti Te'o reported to being in an online relationship for at least two years, and it's now reported the woman didn't even exist.
My tip.
If you're in an online relationship with anyone for an extended period of time, and you want to avoid this simple deception of whether or not the person actually exists, make sure you see them on webcam. Don't just see them on cam. Ask them to do a series of specific things, that way you know it's not a video feed.
Don't allow the person to emotionally manipulate you when you ask for this simple verification of their existence. Any running from proving of their existence should be a MAJOR red flag to you. Again, don't be naive and don't let them emotionally manipulate you.
NEVER and i mean NEVER get emotionally attached to someone who you can't at least verify they are who they say they are in their picture. You MUST be able to verify that they at least match up with the person they claim to be in their picture.
Disclaimer 2: By asking them to do specific things on cam, it's implied that these should be moral things. In no way do I condone asking them to do immoral things. By "things" I mean simple actions they can do such as drinking out of a cup, tapping their head, and such.
Disclaimer 3: By drinking out of a cup, in no way do I imply they should drink adult beverages, but i'm also not implying adult beverages in moderation are wrong. By tapping their head, I meant with their hand, not with a hammer. By and such, I mean general moral, non-violent things.
Manti Te'o reported to being in an online relationship for at least two years, and it's now reported the woman didn't even exist.
My tip.
If you're in an online relationship with anyone for an extended period of time, and you want to avoid this simple deception of whether or not the person actually exists, make sure you see them on webcam. Don't just see them on cam. Ask them to do a series of specific things, that way you know it's not a video feed.
Don't allow the person to emotionally manipulate you when you ask for this simple verification of their existence. Any running from proving of their existence should be a MAJOR red flag to you. Again, don't be naive and don't let them emotionally manipulate you.
NEVER and i mean NEVER get emotionally attached to someone who you can't at least verify they are who they say they are in their picture. You MUST be able to verify that they at least match up with the person they claim to be in their picture.
Disclaimer 2: By asking them to do specific things on cam, it's implied that these should be moral things. In no way do I condone asking them to do immoral things. By "things" I mean simple actions they can do such as drinking out of a cup, tapping their head, and such.
Disclaimer 3: By drinking out of a cup, in no way do I imply they should drink adult beverages, but i'm also not implying adult beverages in moderation are wrong. By tapping their head, I meant with their hand, not with a hammer. By and such, I mean general moral, non-violent things.
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