Why Aren't You Married?

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AsifinPassing said:
While I respect everyone's opinion, I find it sad when people say..."I want to live my life, and then I'll get married."

Will I be the death of a woman, or she of me? Is marriage just some prison to be trapped by?

I would enjoy sharing my personal hopes, dreams, goals with someone I loved, but that's just me. I honestly don't think age, finances, locations, or any such parts are life are road-blocks to a good relationship, nor the relationship destructive of them.

In fact, I often reflect on the sadness of missing out on the first part of my future spouse's life. I'll have never known them in their youth (and should it not be for a while) or college years. I won't get to see that growth, share in those struggles, celebrate with those joys, or have that love...

Not that I'm moping over it or anything, but I do feel/see it as loss.
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Yeah you definitely have a point there AsifinPassing. BTW, you're AWESOME! To get to the point though, it's just personal preference for me as well as it may be for you. Personally, if I got married now, there is no way I'd be able to even focus on school next year. I can't handle that many commitments that important at one time. I'd be either so focused on Jon that I forget about my schoolwork or I'd be so focused on my schoolwork and not pay any attention to Jon. That's just how my mind is ;) I'm not throwing your opinion out either. Sometimes, I do wonder what he is doing out on the road besides sitting in a truck. I like to wonder what he's thinking when I'm not around him. It's stuff like that. Right now, he and I just plain can't afford it either. Maybe we might get married after graduation. But right now, we both find it important just to get to know one another without having that heavy commitment on each other yet...or that pressure.
 
BarlyGurl said:
That was a really nice post Asif :D
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Thank you, BarlyGurl. Honestly, it's just what I think, and how I feel.

JesusChica1991 said:
Yeah you definitely have a point there AsifinPassing. BTW, you're AWESOME! To get to the point though, it's just personal preference for me as well as it may be for you. Personally, if I got married now, there is no way I'd be able to even focus on school next year. I can't handle that many commitments that important at one time. I'd be either so focused on Jon that I forget about my schoolwork or I'd be so focused on my schoolwork and not pay any attention to Jon. That's just how my mind is ;) I'm not throwing your opinion out either. Sometimes, I do wonder what he is doing out on the road besides sitting in a truck. I like to wonder what he's thinking when I'm not around him. It's stuff like that. Right now, he and I just plain can't afford it either. Maybe we might get married after graduation. But right now, we both find it important just to get to know one another without having that heavy commitment on each other yet...or that pressure.
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I hear you, JesusChica, and I meant no discouragement, disrespect, or any other uncourteousness by my response. It's just that, well, maybe a mate would help me focus...

Everyone's case is different, and that's not a bad thing. If you both feel that you're doing your best for God and one another, then...don't worry about it. You're good. ^^

My point basically falls on this strange idea people seem to have of having to separate everything. You can be individual and part of a group. You can be happy and single. You can fulfill your dream WITHIN a marriage AND with children! It's just funny how we think, feel, or socially adhere to these ideas of segregation.

For instance, I'm definitely NOT waiting until retirement to live my life to the fullest and do what I wanna do. NO (*Insert strong feeling words) WAY!! I've always been one who feels the need to love, live, and enjoy life every step of the way! In every moment, even the 'regular' or 'mundane' days...if need be, I'll find a way to make them an adventure! I'll do what I can wherever and whenever, because...I want to. I have to.

Each day is a gift, and no one is promised tomorrow. I want to live my life without regret. I want to love each person, and especially those cherished closely as if it's my last chance to... every time! I'm bad at it...I often forget, and I have a tendency to royally mess things up on occasion. Nonetheless, I want to live for God, others, and still even me. I have fun, because I love it! I love others, because God loves them and it makes me think, feel, speak, and act better when loving. I suppose it even helps me better connect with and be like God, really. I can even love myself at times...which is part of the Greatest Commandments.

Anyway, I didn't mean to write a Novella here, but I want to warn everyone...there's a different between patience and passiveness. It's okay to wait, but don't hesitate. Life's too short, and moments are too precious to just let slip away.
 
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*difference...that no editing after 5 minutes is a killer, Admin bros!! (Sorry for the double-post!)
 
..because this is where God would have me be at this time in my life.
 
AsifinPassing said:
While I respect everyone's opinion, I find it sad when people say..."I want to live my life, and then I'll get married."

Will I be the death of a woman, or she of me? Is marriage just some prison to be trapped by?

I would enjoy sharing my personal hopes, dreams, goals with someone I loved, but that's just me. I honestly don't think age, finances, locations, or any such parts are life are road-blocks to a good relationship, nor the relationship destructive of them.

In fact, I often reflect on the sadness of missing out on the first part of my future spouse's life. I'll have never known them in their youth (and should it not be for a while) or college years. I won't get to see that growth, share in those struggles, celebrate with those joys, or have that love...

Not that I'm moping over it or anything, but I do feel/see it as loss.
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That's really refreshing to read, AsifinPassing. You always hear about guys talking about their wife like "the ol' ball and chain" and feeling like they're trapped and "game over" for them. It's nice to hear that some men look forward to getting married. I mean, for those who don't want to get married, that's fine. Just don't get married and then act like you got dragged into it and now you're stuck.
 
I'm not married because it's very difficult for a guy to say marriage vows while bound and gagged in my basement.
 
AsifinPassing said:
Anyway, I didn't mean to write a Novella here, but I want to warn everyone...there's a different between patience and passiveness. It's okay to wait, but don't hesitate. Life's too short, and moments are too precious to just let slip away.
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Exactly!!!
 
Jullianna said:
I'm not married because it's very difficult for a guy to say marriage vows while bound and gagged in my basement.
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I thought that was Elizabeths thing...you women on here are kinkier than one would expect for christians...lol jk
 
Jullianna said:
I'm not married because it's very difficult for a guy to say marriage vows while bound and gagged in my basement.
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Just call it a part of premarital counseling in preparation for the ball and chain he'll have to wear after the wedding. ZING! :P Guys, are you scared yet? :P
 
The whole idea of marriage is not even in my heart nor mind really. maybe i am an eunuch :P
 
arwen83 said:
Just call it a part of premarital counseling in preparation for the ball and chain he'll have to wear after the wedding. ZING! :P Guys, are you scared yet? :P
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Surprisingly not...im also currently watching cabin in the woods which is far more terrifying
 
arwen83 said:
Just call it a part of premarital counseling in preparation for the ball and chain he'll have to wear after the wedding. ZING! :P Guys, are you scared yet? :P
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lol, the word marriage by itself scares me enough
 
I also got the same questions, but what I can say is, I'm waiting the God's perfect timing. I believe that God will give me the right men in the right time. Human can be forced to marry someone but maybe in the end, life can be miserable because not married to the right person.
 
THERE ARE THINGS WE CANNOT GIVE TO OURSELVES, AND GOOD AND GODLY HUSBAND IS ONE OF THEM.SO IS GOD THAT GIVE SUCH GIFT OK.
 
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