If God Never Brings You A Partner...Cool With That?

  • Thread starter Thread starter iTOREtheSKY
  • Start date Start date
  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
No I wouldn't be okay being alone. I don't even like talking about it. I mean who wants to live their life, grow old and die alone without a significant other? Nobody thats who! On another note I honestly haven't dated a christian guy before all of the guys I have dated were not and that's probably why I'm single now lol. But I grew up in a southern baptist little white country church and there where plenty of older people but no guys my age so whenever I did get older and a couple of them did start coming they became more like brothers than anything but I know God has a plan and there's a reason that it's that way :cool:
 
Am I ok with it? Nope...

May I have to be ok with it?... Hopefully not but possibly.

I had a moment yesterday or the day before reading a post about visions - people knowing things about others. Part of me wanted to ask when I would get married and who to, (silly I know huh!) yet another part of me was terrified of asking this. What if the person said I'd never be married? I'd be crushed, devastated I guess... would I then pray and hope God responded to my prayers to change that? Would I accept it? How would I react?
 
I've recently come to this conclusion: it is better to have the frame of mind that only God can love you like you need to be.
With that in mind, life is much more peaceful and the chances of you being surprised by The Lord if He does so choose to bring a companion into your life.
It's better to expect nothing and get something than to expect something and get nothing.

May The Lord bring rest to the souls of all His children who are distressed about this matter[:
 
I'm trying to be ok with it... I have tried to force myself to think of a life of celibacy.

However, to tell the truth, I'm terrified of being alone. I'd be ok if I had friends who stuck around, but friends get married, move, etc. I'm an extrovert and if I don't have people around I get terribly depressed like recently.

So I'd want a spouse for the mere companionship of it all. Only if it's God's will though.
 
Exactly. But like I said, it's better to not expect a spouse and get one than to expect one and get nothing.
We as believers are called to live by His will, not our own. It's difficult yes, because we are sinners. But nevertheless God gives us what is necessary to get by. By His grace and through our faith we are saved. So we have to have the faith that God will keep us safe and happy with or without a spouse.
 
This thread wasn't really designed with the point of questioning if christians who were married & now divorced should,can,or can't get re-married according to the word of God. I'd rather stick to the topic at hand,which is do you feel you can in your heart follow God's will if even though you have a desire to "be" with someone,can you be cool with that & lay that desire down at his feet & move on with your life? This question was not designed for ppl who were married at one time only,because that's an entirely different can of worms that ppl like to discuss. I think I have made my opinion clear for my life how I feel about that in another thread where that was the topic.
With all that said...I think I see where yer' coming from HS. I am sorry I used the word "feel" even once in this thread,I forget sometimes how I type & how my meanings are lost many times...I also forget that so many ppl out there in the christian community get very technical when you use certain words & assumptions are made that he or she is a baby christian and/or they do not understand that you walk with Jesus isn't based on how you feel...it's based on his word,etc...lol My apologies to any I may have offended by starting this thread


I think you asked a great question.. Me right here? I'll raise
My hand and say " you know what? I
Have not been perfected with my emotions , god is still working some of that out , but thank goodness I'm not
where I use to be, as I'm a work in progress and it also keeps my dependency in Him while in it..so those emotions everyone tries to deny , think I'll embrace them and say .. You know what? Gods working on that with me.. I'm
Not Going to wear a
Mask for anyone .. Let alone myself., so to keep your question on track (itorethesky) you are asking the question with a kind heart ... yea , when God says --> well sister, you have stopped squirming enough and I was able to fix what I was not able to work through, I believe I've made you useable for me " then you bet! Toss me in to be something good to someone , just like what God is to me ..
To know His Love through me.. absolutely, you bet.. if He thinks He still needs to rooter rooter me out some, then let Him continue His work..
Good post and thank you for asking .. it's good to check in and see whats going in inside me and my thinking in the subject has changed quite a bit , so I'm
Glad you asked it :)
 
Then there moments/entire days like today where I'm glad to not be married, if only to spare someone else having to deal with the mess that I am. (Said both jokingly and seriously)
 
Then there moments/entire days like today where I'm glad to not be married, if only to spare someone else having to deal with the mess that I am. (Said both jokingly and seriously)

Be patient, God's not finished with me yet, eh, rachesedge :D


I'm just trying to let thevLord lead my life, never a doubt of that, although the way I'm goinv seems slower than a herd of turtles of running a race, it's not slow in His eyes, it's all good from Him and I pray I can keep on working on myself more to become less and less :)
 
Then there moments/entire days like today where I'm glad to not be married, if only to spare someone else having to deal with the mess that I am. (Said both jokingly and seriously)

I dont know if ive ever been glad not be married but i do understand the sentiment of your post. Lord knows Ive messed up enough for one person's life, not to mention two
 
I'm trying to be ok with it... I have tried to force myself to think of a life of celibacy.

However, to tell the truth, I'm terrified of being alone. I'd be ok if I had friends who stuck around, but friends get married, move, etc. I'm an extrovert and if I don't have people around I get terribly depressed like recently.

So I'd want a spouse for the mere companionship of it all. Only if it's God's will though.
Nuns...I think many people in general (not just christians) deal with how you feel. Unfortunately those are never good reasons to start a relationship,or go down the road to marriage. (which you obviously know) Sometimes you can end up feeling alone even worse when your with someone if it's not ordained by God...heck,I've even known strong christian couples that have had times in their marriage where they've felt terribly alone. As always,everything comes down to just daily giving our hearts & minds over to God more & more. Easier said than done,I know. Thank God,we are all works in progress. I worry,the day I wake up & feel as though I've "arrived" & think I've got all the answers...lol surely my ruin will be just around the corner that day. :)
 
Then there moments/entire days like today where I'm glad to not be married, if only to spare someone else having to deal with the mess that I am. (Said both jokingly and seriou)

Daddy said there would be days like that rache.
Call me if you need a posse round up started :)
 
I'm Not Going to wear a Mask for anyone...
when God says --> well sister, you have stopped squirming enough and I was able to fix what I was not able to work through, I believe I've made you useable for me " then you bet! Toss me in to be something good to someone , just like what God is to me ..
To know His Love through me.. absolutely, you bet.. if He thinks He still needs to rooter rooter me out some, then let Him continue His work..
How will you know when God has done this? A marriage succeeds on the efforts of more than one person, and a marriage fails on the failure or more than one person. I can think of at least four factors: The husband, the wife, God, and whether the two are right for each other. God's not going to make any mistakes, of course, but that leaves three other causes that must be considered, not just one.

I think that to expect that because we are from a failed marriage, that God needs to fix a lot with us may be premature. Just like to say because we are from a successful marriage that God does not need to fix anything in us is wrong. I think the part about not wearing a mask is vitally important. I think letting God fix us is vitally important. The trick is to know who we are in Christ, and what we want out of life, and to be willing to offer to share that however we feel is God, be it marriage or single. Then there's no mask, and the love express, however we express it, can be real and so His.
 
Then there moments/entire days like today where I'm glad to not be married, if only to spare someone else having to deal with the mess that I am. (Said both jokingly and seriou)

Daddy said there would be days like that rache.
Call me if you need a posse round up started :)

Twice the crises, but twice the help to deal with them.
 
No I wouldn't be okay being alone. I don't even like talking about it. I mean who wants to live their life, grow old and die alone without a significant other? Nobody thats who! On another note I honestly haven't dated a christian guy before all of the guys I have dated were not and that's probably why I'm single now lol. But I grew up in a southern baptist little white country church and there where plenty of older people but no guys my age so whenever I did get older and a couple of them did start coming they became more like brothers than anything but I know God has a plan and there's a reason that it's that way :cool:

Live your life through God, redrobin, and, He will keep you until that day, His peace, His love is enough, to get you through times that seem tough,vgo to Him , His peace and His love will be there. :)

I'm trying to be ok with it... I have tried to force myself to think of a life of celibacy.

However, to tell the truth, I'm terrified of being alone. I'd be ok if I had friends who stuck around, but friends get married, move, etc. I'm an extrovert and if I don't have people around I get terribly depressed like recently.

So I'd want a spouse for the mere companionship of it all. Only if it's God's will though.

What are you afraid of? He will NEVER leave you nor forsake you IF you have Him as your Lord and Saviour. :)


The Lord is my shepherd I shall not want He leadeth me beside still waters . He restores my soul . Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil, for thou art with me . Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou annointest my head with oil. My cup runneth over surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of the day of my live and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever . " :)

Exactly. But like I said, it's better to not expect a spouse and get one than to expect one and get nothing.
We as believers are called to live by His will, not our own. It's difficult yes, because we are sinners. But nevertheless God gives us what is necessary to get by. By His grace and through our faith we are saved. So we have to have the faith that God will keep us safe and happy with or without a spouse.

Expect His leading good for your life, and, I got news for you, good news on that note, 'it' is only ALL of good.
"It's all good,' we hear that cliche' often, don't we. But, it's not all good, in fact, not much is good, only Him, and, His ways, and, yes, God creatwd everything and sooo much good in God and His ways , it's all good but only from God.
Don't have to fully understand that either ammman :), but 'it' is.


:)
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Expect His leading good for your life, and, I got news for you, good news on that note, 'it' is only ALL of good.
"It's all good,' we hear that cliche' often, don't we. But, it's not all good, in fact, not much is good, only Him, and, His ways, and, yes, God creatwd everything and sooo much good in God and His ways , it's all good but only from God.
Don't have to fully understand that either ammman :), but 'it' is.


Yes[: no matter how bad things seem to us, they are always good in The Lord's sight. "For we know that God brings all things together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28)
 
I'm Sorry... but this thread title is soooooo...NOT BIBLICAL!
The idea that it is God's job to BRING a partner is not biblical... God has done his job! He made Adam and Eve and populated the earth, the secured our redemption and gave us His inspired word with specific guidance on how to pair up!!!
 
I'm Sorry... but this thread title is soooooo...NOT BIBLICAL!
The idea that it is God's job to BRING a partner is not biblical... God has done his job! He made Adam and Eve and populated the earth, the secured our redemption and gave us His inspired word with specific guidance on how to pair up!!!
LOL wow! I never meant to imply that it was God's "job" to find anyone a partner. Of course he has already done everything for us by giving us his word & sending us Jesus & the Holy Spirit. I'm not sure,but I think I can safely say you're the 1st person thus far to have a problem with the title of this thread. If the title causes you that much grief,I apologize. I am certain you can find a plethora of other threads with titles much more "non-biblical" in nature than this. The idea of the thread title,again is not to imply that God must or must not bring he/she a partner...it should imply that God's hand should be involved in the decision whether one does or does not find/choose to find or end up with someone.
 
LOL wow! I never meant to imply that it was God's "job" to find anyone a partner. Of course he has already done everything for us by giving us his word & sending us Jesus & the Holy Spirit. I'm not sure,but I think I can safely say you're the 1st person thus far to have a problem with the title of this thread. If the title causes you that much grief,I apologize. I am certain you can find a plethora of other threads with titles much more "non-biblical" in nature than this. The idea of the thread title,again is not to imply that God must or must not bring he/she a partner...it should imply that God's hand should be involved in the decision whether one does or does not find/choose to find or end up with someone.

No need to go OVERBOARD... the idea that God's hand needs to be involved in the decision... to find/choose... Is exactly what I was referring to. There are a more than enough potential mates to choose from.... and while this has been an issue of debate in other threads... plainly speaking:
If Christian marriage is to be a picture between Christ and the Church... then all that is required is a man find a christian woman who consents... period. We can turn this into a 15-thousand response thread in opinion and debate but once a person decides to pin in down to scripture... that's the bottom line. This Forum has the majority of singles saying "if it's God's will for me to marry"... YES YES YES it IS!!!... and instead of wondering "if" it would be more productive to pursue "doing".
Making an end run around my point and restating the claim that God'd hand be involved "IF"... is just quarreling over words not the point. You either believe the bible or you don't... if a person lacks understanding... they can pray God open the scripture to them... so there is NO excuse there.
And yes... I am the first person... because I really do wish to encourage people to LEARN THE BIBLE, so they can be successful in life endeavors, as opposed to floundering around with questions like the title of this thread.