Lost.

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Hanah_Love

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Hey there everyone. My name is Hanah and I'm 16. I've been addicted to dating all my life. I know how that sounds... Stupid right? Well it's true. My first boyfriend was in 1st grade. First kiss, 6th grade. Lost my virginity in 10th grade. But gladly after my baptism I haven't had sex. (Yay me!) And I can't stand being single. I've been single for about 5 months now and it's scary.. I get this feeling that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. Anxiety takes I've me.. I am the kind of person who loves people! Making sure that people are happy makes me so happy!
This might sound a little rude or stupid so stay with me here..
When I find a guy who is lonely or is in a tough situation in life, I make it my project (so to speak) and try to make them happy.. Once I do make them happy i get... Bored.
I know... Terrible person.. Right?
I really need help through this. I need to find a Christian guy.. But where are they!!!! Help... I'm desperate for answers..
 
Okay, there's a lot to say here. If you're wanting privacy, then I can PM you. If you don't care, I'll post here. Let me know.
 
We tend to believe loneliness means we need a boyfriend or girlfriend in our lives. In reality, it is just God saying that we need to spend more time with Him, lean on Him, and become content with His love. It's possible the boredom comes from not getting the kind of love you actually need, which you can't get from another human. Instead of looking for another relationship with some guy, try falling in love with Christ. If you need to share your love, there are so many other options outside of dating (church and community work for instance).

Set some time aside each day to spend with God. Here is a site that can help get you started if you don't have any devotionals of your own Teen Devotions, Youth Devotions, Evangelism Training - Dare 2 Share Youth Ministry Resources the internet is full of free resources so take a look around and find one that fits you (just be sure to check their statement of faith to make sure it aligns with your own).

You wont be able to find a truly fulfilling relationship until you are able to fulfill your relationship with Christ.
 
just keep telling yourself that you can do it,learn ways to adapt to being single, learn to be independent, learn to be self sufficient and if youre lonely, you could always get a dog, lol!!. so if you havent been single most of your life, why do you think that you'll start being single for the rest of your life? Think about it! :P.. THis gives you a chance to learn to be by yourself and self- sufficient and become a better you, trust be guys will like you even more, the better guys too maybe even some Christians, the guys that won't just go for you for the mere reason that you are physically attractive! :P. I know I would! :P!.
 
I'm 35 and not long ago felt kinda the same. so give of yourself through the church through a charity. read the world start a group, you are doing a great job. I'll be praying for you. ohhh and I don't feethat way anymore so its possible you just need more time
 
Hanah_Love said:
Hey there everyone. My name is Hanah and I'm 16. I've been addicted to dating all my life. I know how that sounds... Stupid right? Well it's true. My first boyfriend was in 1st grade. First kiss, 6th grade. Lost my virginity in 10th grade. But gladly after my baptism I haven't had sex. (Yay me!) And I can't stand being single. I've been single for about 5 months now and it's scary.. I get this feeling that I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. Anxiety takes I've me.. I am the kind of person who loves people! Making sure that people are happy makes me so happy!
This might sound a little rude or stupid so stay with me here..
When I find a guy who is lonely or is in a tough situation in life, I make it my project (so to speak) and try to make them happy.. Once I do make them happy i get... Bored.
I know... Terrible person.. Right?
I really need help through this. I need to find a Christian guy.. But where are they!!!! Help... I'm desperate for answers..
Click to expand...

You need to find a Christian guy? Thats the last thing you need. You don't need to be dating at all. You have some issues that need to be worked through and resolved before you can even consider another relationship. Its not likely you will ever be in a happy, long term relationship until your mentality changes. First about viewing people as projects, and second, this desperation to be in a relationship.

If you are that unhappy being single, then likely you are not happy in many other areas of your life. Which means you are expecting relationships to fulfill you. That is not what relationships are about. They aren't about 'fixing' others, and they aren't about finding happiness. A true, healthy relationship, the people involved are happy with themselves, and happy with being single, even if they would rather not be. Your desperation to date reflects some big things you're not dealing with.
And you take on these 'projects' to make them happy, but when you get bored, then what? Ditch them? How happy are they then?
 
Ugly said:
You need to find a Christian guy? Thats the last thing you need. You don't need to be dating at all. You have some issues that need to be worked through and resolved before you can even consider another relationship. Its not likely you will ever be in a happy, long term relationship until your mentality changes. First about viewing people as projects, and second, this desperation to be in a relationship.

If you are that unhappy being single, then likely you are not happy in many other areas of your life. Which means you are expecting relationships to fulfill you. That is not what relationships are about. They aren't about 'fixing' others, and they aren't about finding happiness. A true, healthy relationship, the people involved are happy with themselves, and happy with being single, even if they would rather not be. Your desperation to date reflects some big things you're not dealing with.
And you take on these 'projects' to make them happy, but when you get bored, then what? Ditch them? How happy are they then?
Click to expand...

Ugly speaks the truth...

I'm concerned for you. I've just seen so many girls, Christian girls even, that felt like they needed to be in a relationship. They hop from one relationship to the next and the more they get into, the harder it is to be alone and the harder it becomes to make the next one work. They always start young. I've never seen one actually break this cycle, so I'm at a loss as to what advice can be given. I guess it will just take a repentance, a radical changing of your mind.
 
The Lord broke that cycle in me...so if you two or anyone else would like to hear me testimony, let me know. GOD IS A JEALOUS GOD WHO WANTS TO BE ON THE THRONE OF YOUR HEART ABOVE ALL ELSE!! And HE wont let go of pursuiting you! Cuz He is crazy in love with you!!! And He knows what;s best for us!!
 
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Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth, while the evil days come not, nor the years draw nigh, when thou shalt say, I have no pleasure in them;

It would be so good if we seek God in the days of our youth, and learn how much love He can pour into our laps. I would suggest you to think about it.


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