CRA Christians in Recovery (anonymous)

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calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,777
3,973
113
65
lawton ok
I’ve just found a church and will be going on Sunday. I’m really anxious about it. But then I get nervous of most things now I’m not inebriated most of the time! 🤣
We say 1 step at a time. 1 day at a time and easy does it for reasons that are self explanatory. I took time to get us to get addicted. It took time for us admit you (and I) have serious problems.

So don't 1/2 heartedly rush through them like it's some kind of timed school problem or something that can be cured like the flu. It's more like diabetes.
 
Jun 26, 2019
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We say 1 step at a time. 1 day at a time and easy does it for reasons that are self explanatory. I took time to get us to get addicted. It took time for us admit you (and I) have serious problems.

So don't 1/2 heartedly rush through them like it's some kind of timed school problem or something that can be cured like the flu. It's more like diabetes.
I’m taking myself out of certain environments. And having to end friendships. They aren’t real friends anyway. The changes are actually quite exciting. I feel much more positive than yesterday. The future doesn’t feel so dark now.

But as you say, one step at a time...
 

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,777
3,973
113
65
lawton ok
I’m taking myself out of certain environments. And having to end friendships. They aren’t real friends anyway. The changes are actually quite exciting. I feel much more positive than yesterday. The future doesn’t feel so dark now.

But as you say, one step at a time...
A saying I learned a few years ago is "If you don't want your hair cut, Quit hanging out at the barber shop."
 

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,777
3,973
113
65
lawton ok
I’m taking myself out of certain environments. And having to end friendships. They aren’t real friends anyway. The changes are actually quite exciting. I feel much more positive than yesterday. The future doesn’t feel so dark now.

But as you say, one step at a time...
Have you ever been to a 12 step meeting? Do you have Alano clubs in your area? The clubs are places for sober people to hang out and make friends and meetings are for listening and sharing. I just replace the words higher power and god as you understand him with Jesus whom I really believe in and pray to and have no conflict.

Many an alcoholic/addict have found or returned to the Lord via the program. Although it's aimed to help agnostics Steps 2-12 require members to come to believe that something greater than us is here and will help us recover, if we only seek it. I found it and it's Jesus and he brought me back from an insane level of alcoholism/ addiction to step 12. Carry the message; Jesus saves and the program works if we work it!
 

Bingo

Well-known member
Feb 9, 2019
1,577
1,168
113

Every Day You are a One Day At A Time Miracle!!!

ODAATs 7232
Hours 173584
Minutes 10415042
Sober Breaths 182293619


Suck another one in!
Blow it back out!!
Wow!!! That Feels GOOD!!!
(I remember the time when I thought I would never draw another sober breath and
I have to ask myself, "Just how bad are things today, COMPARED TO WHEN??")


Keep Doing It!!!

KEEP COMING BACK!

ONE DAY AT A TIME!


( sobriety calculator data resource as of today! )
'Praise God'

563e0526621ea_man_praying_silhouette-resized-600-Copy_jpg_0b82847a16daaa9ce48d0ca8f14dc4d5 - C...png :)


 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
26,798
5,327
113
Patience is waiting for reality to catch up with what we've already imagined. Patience takes courage: it asks that we will be brave through the uncertainty of the unfolding. It takes faith. It asks that before the evidence comes in to prove our hunch, we will nevertheless keep believing the beautiful thing can happen.

Patience is a virtue because it never comes easily; patience is a discipline that requires we stretch beyond our limits. Patience is holy, an exercise for our spirits. It is an act of Love because unless we love ourselves, we will never be able to undertake it. Daphne Rose Kingma
 

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,777
3,973
113
65
lawton ok
I think most here have never been to sea. When the land or place we seek is beyond the horizon and the wind is still we can still make progress if we stay in the current but from our myoptic perspective we don't seem to be getting anywhere. We way be more used to chaos than tranquil, peaceful success. Take heart. We are not like a message in a bottle without any direction or course, just because our landmarks are temporarily out of sight.

There is a peaceful time to make sure our lines are secure and our stores are full. Just keep the brass polished and the decks clean because when the wind picks back up and our sails are full we will be to busy to fish or clean.

One day at a time, easy does it just study the map and the sky the plan is working even when things are serene. That's the beauty of SERENITY.
 

Bingo

Well-known member
Feb 9, 2019
1,577
1,168
113
I think most here have never been to sea. When the land or place we seek is beyond the horizon and the wind is still we can still make progress if we stay in the current but from our myoptic perspective we don't seem to be getting anywhere. We way be more used to chaos than tranquil, peaceful success. Take heart. We are not like a message in a bottle without any direction or course, just because our landmarks are temporarily out of sight.

There is a peaceful time to make sure our lines are secure and our stores are full. Just keep the brass polished and the decks clean because when the wind picks back up and our sails are full we will be to busy to fish or clean.

One day at a time, easy does it just study the map and the sky the plan is working even when things are serene. That's the beauty of SERENITY.
"Amen"
dove%20circle%20frame - Copy - Copy (3) - Copy - Copy - Copy - Copy.jpg :)
 

Bingo

Well-known member
Feb 9, 2019
1,577
1,168
113
"ODAAT ......and, each day I turn to God for my strength, courage and hope, knowing in
God's care...all is well."
'Praise God'
2350_4e13802c_full - Copy (2) - Copy.jpg :)
 

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,777
3,973
113
65
lawton ok
The final paragraphs and last line from Dr. Bob's Nightmare from Alcoholics Anonymous part 1, all editions;

If you think you are an atheist, an agnostic, a skeptic, or have any other form of intellectual pride which keeps you from accepting what is in this book, I feel sorry for you. If you still think you are strong enough to beat the game alone, that is your affair. But if you really and truly want to quit drinking liquor for good and all, and sincerely feel that you must have some help, we know that we have an answer for you. It never fails if you go about it with one half the zeal you have been in the habit of showing when getting another drink.

Your Heavenly Father will never let you down!

Reprinted from Alcoholics Anonymous, with permission of A.A. World Services, Inc.
 

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,777
3,973
113
65
lawton ok
I was out for a ride one nice pleasant day and notice this bird and snapped a pic from my beach cruiser.>

After I examined it later I noticed what I saw was different than what it could see. So I wondered about our own distorted self image. Karen Carpenter died of a distorted self image she thought she was fat.>​

1564024438793.png
The purpose for steps 4 & 5 is in order that may come face to face with ourselves and admit who we are and to ourselves, God and another human being. Who we are and what we became is important to know. That's how we get better! we may have an inflated self image or a depressed image. Either way we may need a different perspective than the one we can see on the surface. Food, drugs, alcohol, sex and gambling are some of the ways we use to escape from ourselves. The steps are how we get right with ourselves, God, family and others. Working the steps save lives!
 

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,777
3,973
113
65
lawton ok
From Alcoholics Anonomyous Big Book Chapter 7:

Working with others.

WORKING WITH OTHERS; PRACTICAL EXPERIENCE shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking as intensive work with other alcoholics. It works when other activities fail. This is our twelfth suggestion: Carry this message to other alcoholics! You can help when no one else can. You can secure their confidence when others fail. Remember they are very ill. Life will take on new meaning. To watch people recover, to see them help others, to watch loneliness vanish, to see a fellowship grow up about you, to have a host of friends—this is an experience you must not miss. We know you will not want to miss it. Frequent contact with newcomers and with each other is the bright spot of our lives. Perhaps you are not acquainted with any drinkers who want to recover. You can easily find some by asking a few doctors, ministers, priests or hospitals. They will be only too glad to assist you. Don’t start out as an evangelist or reformer. Unfortunately a lot of prejudice exists. You will be handicapped if you arouse it. Ministers and doctors are competent and you can learn much from them if you wish, but it happens that because of your own drinking experience you can be uniquely useful to other alcoholics. So cooperate; never criticize. To be helpful is our only aim.


Unfortunately the false piety, rhetoric and observed self righteousness of so called religious people has turned many away from churches, religions and also God. Conversely many churches have not accepted and even rejected the fact that addiction is a certifiable mental as well as often a physical illness that takes more than prayer and fasting to overcome. They don't understand after the bridge is crossed from recreational or habitual use has been crossed into full blown addiction, will power has little if any long term effect. Some even think it's as easy as saying NO. They don't realize that the addicted parts of the brain have power and influence over the logical parts of it.

Then there those who have been in meetings where the steps are regarded superior to the power of God and accept a multitude of gods or philosophies as higher powers. The victims shun the 12 steps as a false religion because some the folks in the rooms have made it so. In their own minds and try to promote that faith in a creator isn't necessary. Well in honesty some with that attitude do achieve long term abstinence but use the program as a placebo, rather than the real needed medication Of God in every step. (Other than step 1 admitting that they need help.)

CRA is an attempt to help Christians bridge those gaps.

Working with others takes us out of our near sighted, self centered focus and helps us. We will feel useful again as we serve God and the community. All we have to do is tell the truth.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
26,798
5,327
113

I praise the Lord for the life I live and the hope I have in a better future with a shared love for Him and each other :)
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
26,798
5,327
113
Strength, whatever form- physical, emotional, spiritual, intellectual, intuitive- is what delivers us from the tyranny of our past and of the limitations we have internalized because of it.

Therefore, strength and the development of it becomes a measure and mirror of yourself. It delivers you to a larger life, a life of greater dimension and depth. Strength allows you to individuate from your parents, to see your own power, and to use it on your own behalf. Strength is valor, self-love that honors your individuality.

Therefore it is important to meditate upon your strengths, to gather the knowledge of them around you like a suit of armor that you have handcrafted yourself, link by link, peace by beautiful piece. Daphne Rose Kingma


The joy of the Lord is my strength :)




 
Aug 7, 2019
5
5
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I have two childhood friends that are in homosexual relationships. Both women have children with other women whom they we're artificially inseminated by males that they know. One of the couples is married and the other couple are engaged or already married. I love both of them, I grew up with them, they are definitely important to me. I am very bothered by homosexuality, to the point that some may say I am homophobic. I am saddened by the way we were living. There was a moment in 2011 where I was literally stopped in my tracks and I looked at the land with the strip malls and the busy streets and I thought (more like felt) to myself in a profound way from within, why are we living like this? It seemed so foreign to me, almost as if I was seeing the world through eyes that were not my own yet more familiar than my own (the familiarity was the consciousness, the unfamiliarity were the cars and malls. I was starting to question the existence of God more so than I ever have, I grew up considering myself an atheist mostly, although I did wonder from time to time). It was a very strange experience, I believe I was awakening to my soul self who has memory of eternal life, times when we were living much more holy than this way. I feel like my soul is aching for that. I have a twin sister who is a homosexual addicted to crystal meth and it tears me apart. I am a sinner myself. I have vices that I still struggle with. Eating junk food and getting angry instead of having faith. My vice might not sound dire, at least not as dire as the crystal meth problem, but it is definitely a problem when you're wanting to live a holy life and you just can't get it together. If all that mattered was going to work, coming home, taking care of the family, laughing and having fun, I really wouldn't be that upset with myself, but I do feel this push to be holy and it's so hard and heartbreaking when us as a whole are allowing so much craziness to happen and anyone speaking up against it is found to be politically incorrect or insensitive. My heart aches for us and I want peace.
 

Attachments

Aug 7, 2019
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Good morning everyone, and good morning Kim :) My name is Magenta and I am a recovered alcoholic/addict. I also sometimes say I am a recovered Catholic :giggle: To say I am a recovered alcoholic/addict simply means I no longer use mind and mood altering substances, nor do I crave them, or obsess about them in any way. The only promise of NA is that an addict, ANY addict, can stop using, lose the desire to use, and find a new way to live. For this I thank God.

One of my problems was that I did not really see myself as an addict. Using for twenty four years and overdosing and being hospitalised multiple times, all connected to harder drugs and alcohol, well, I simply tried self-imposed damage control by using easier softer drugs that would not kill me...

It took me eighteen months of abstinence before I saw the disease more clearly for what it was, and how it had infiltrated just about every aspect of my life. None of the steps in NA mention drugs, but do reference the disease of addiction. I used to read the literature and substitute other things when drugs were mentioned, because I did understand that drugs were just a symptom of my disease.

Part of the disease is a distorted self image. Women in particular seem to be susceptible to this, though we probably all suffer from it in some way, shape, or form. I remember always wanting to be smaller, and believing I was fat when I was in actual fact quite slim. I weighed less in my later teens than I did during puberty, when I was always trying to hide my body. I maintained a body weight close to one hundred and twenty pounds throughout my twenties (I am 5'4"), except when I did certain drugs, and then I loved it when I fell below a hundred and ten, though others told me I looked like I was ready for the morgue :unsure::giggle::oops::geek:

Having lost forty pounds in the last year and a half by changing my diet for convenience sake, which acted as portion control, has given me far more perspective on what being overweight really is, and what a distorted self image I still can carry. But it does get better :D
Thank you so much for sharing. I've struggled since puberty about my weight as well and have similarly kept a body weight at about a hundred ten and I'm 5 foot 2 and loved it when I was doing drugs that I got below a hundred. Sounds like we're very alike except I'm just shorter than you. I'm sure we have our personality differences as well. Thank you for sharing seriously, it's nice to know that I'm not alone. I don't have many friends now, I don't drink, do drugs, smoke cigarettes. I keep to myself mostly and feeling pretty lonely so I came on to this site in hopes of having some decent human interaction. My family for the most part are non Christians who accept homosexuality and honestly, it really bothers me. I am starting to feel like people think that I'm evil or mean because I don't like that way and trust me, I love all of my gay friends I just hate that lifestyle because I feel my soul is longing for something else. I don't know whether I should just give up or keep on having faith because it just seemed so hopeless sometimes. My sister is still using crystal meth and so many people are struggling with this addiction. And even without drugs, there is obesity and pornography and so many other things that get in the way of us living an amazing existence in God's Earth. In Revelations he says to let the vile be vile and the holy be holy. It's difficult for me to let ones I care for be vile when I care about them. Why would I want to let them destroy themselves? I know I'm not on the best terms with God, I am a repenting woman, I pray that he will have mercy on me, I am not a saint. What are your thoughts on a big change that might allow the holy ones to inhabit the Earth and everyone else gets to die off? The ones who are worthy to enjoy life without having to see so much misery around them and pretend like things are okay when it just eats them up inside? I hope there is a day that the Earth can be that way.
Thank you for the reminder on portion control. I have been struggling with that recently. After quitting alcohol and cigarettes, my vice has been junk food. So, I really think I'm going to try to do that whole portion control thing. Do you mind giving me an example of a meal that you eat and the amount?
 

calibob

Sinner saved by grace
May 29, 2018
5,777
3,973
113
65
lawton ok
Thank you so much for sharing. I've struggled since puberty about my weight as well and have similarly kept a body weight at about a hundred ten and I'm 5 foot 2 and loved it when I was doing drugs that I got below a hundred. Sounds like we're very alike except I'm just shorter than you. I'm sure we have our personality differences as well. Thank you for sharing seriously, it's nice to know that I'm not alone. I don't have many friends now, I don't drink, do drugs, smoke cigarettes. I keep to myself mostly and feeling pretty lonely so I came on to this site in hopes of having some decent human interaction. My family for the most part are non Christians who accept homosexuality and honestly, it really bothers me. I am starting to feel like people think that I'm evil or mean because I don't like that way and trust me, I love all of my gay friends I just hate that lifestyle because I feel my soul is longing for something else. I don't know whether I should just give up or keep on having faith because it just seemed so hopeless sometimes. My sister is still using crystal meth and so many people are struggling with this addiction. And even without drugs, there is obesity and pornography and so many other things that get in the way of us living an amazing existence in God's Earth. In Revelations he says to let the vile be vile and the holy be holy. It's difficult for me to let ones I care for be vile when I care about them. Why would I want to let them destroy themselves? I know I'm not on the best terms with God, I am a repenting woman, I pray that he will have mercy on me, I am not a saint. What are your thoughts on a big change that might allow the holy ones to inhabit the Earth and everyone else gets to die off? The ones who are worthy to enjoy life without having to see so much misery around them and pretend like things are okay when it just eats them up inside? I hope there is a day that the Earth can be that way.
Thank you for the reminder on portion control. I have been struggling with that recently. After quitting alcohol and cigarettes, my vice has been junk food. So, I really think I'm going to try to do that whole portion control thing. Do you mind giving me an example of a meal that you eat and the amount?
Wow. Thank you so much for sharing. You said a lot about many deep and often disturbing problems. I'm not shy or homophobic by modern traditions. Don't be shocked if I respond frankly and sincerely to what you have shared. Here goes;

I think many people don't expect sexual inclinations to be gone after The Lord returns, I do. And the roots of most addictions including sexual, substance abuse, food even video games are often the result of what many of us call H.A.L.T. that stands for Hungry, Angry, Lonely and Tired. They are often a relief or distraction from the depression, despair and monotony of life and an escape from life on life's terms. And many do not understand that Homosexuality is a sin of the flesh like much adultery, drunkenness and lying. The pro gay agenda places desires of the flesh above needs of the spirit and would rather serve their genitals than God. (who made them.)

It's a bohemian, hedonistic attitude that is engulfing society. With popular approval that thinks if it feels good it's ok to do it. We know better. It's OK to feel repulsed by their behavior. I feel it is more normal than accepting it. People who are self rightous at church but have not empathy for the lost and the sick, I feel have a spiritual void that they should seek the Lord and His Holy Spirit to fill.

We must be born again, not of the flesh. If you can stand to witness to them out of kindness and compassion by all means do. If their sin makes you so angry it causes you to sin or hate. Get away, no harm no foul. We are the bride of Christ. He washes us white as snow.

I was the first on my Mothers side of the family to abandon the holy baloney of sacramental and dogmatic worship, symbolism, tradition, and prayer to Mary, Saints, statues, angels and other false nonsense. They urged me to turn back from being born again and ask a priest to forgive me.

About eating. Because it gives me pleasure more than fasting I tend to over do it sometimes but not to the point that I would consider it an eating disorder. So most of what I know about comes only from reading and/or observation. I feel underqualified. Keep comming back.
 

Magenta

Senior Member
Jul 3, 2015
26,798
5,327
113
Thank you so much for sharing. I've struggled since puberty about my weight as well and have similarly kept a body weight at about a hundred ten and I'm 5 foot 2 and loved it when I was doing drugs that I got below a hundred. Sounds like we're very alike except I'm just shorter than you. I'm sure we have our personality differences as well. Thank you for sharing seriously, it's nice to know that I'm not alone. I don't have many friends now, I don't drink, do drugs, smoke cigarettes. I keep to myself mostly and feeling pretty lonely so I came on to this site in hopes of having some decent human interaction. My family for the most part are non Christians who accept homosexuality and honestly, it really bothers me. I am starting to feel like people think that I'm evil or mean because I don't like that way and trust me, I love all of my gay friends I just hate that lifestyle because I feel my soul is longing for something else. I don't know whether I should just give up or keep on having faith because it just seemed so hopeless sometimes. My sister is still using crystal meth and so many people are struggling with this addiction. And even without drugs, there is obesity and pornography and so many other things that get in the way of us living an amazing existence in God's Earth. In Revelations he says to let the vile be vile and the holy be holy. It's difficult for me to let ones I care for be vile when I care about them. Why would I want to let them destroy themselves? I know I'm not on the best terms with God, I am a repenting woman, I pray that he will have mercy on me, I am not a saint. What are your thoughts on a big change that might allow the holy ones to inhabit the Earth and everyone else gets to die off? The ones who are worthy to enjoy life without having to see so much misery around them and pretend like things are okay when it just eats them up inside? I hope there is a day that the Earth can be that way.

Thank you for the reminder on portion control. I have been struggling with that recently. After quitting alcohol and cigarettes, my vice has been junk food. So, I really think I'm going to try to do that whole portion control thing. Do you mind giving me an example of a meal that you eat and the amount?
Hello Anonymous83, welcome to CC! I am glad you found your way here, and I hope you find friends and support here as well. Isolation is too easy to fall into when we have interactive devices, and entertainment at our fingertips. I do hope you make some effort if you are able, to find a church home if you do not have one (which sounds to be the case). I attended many different churches following my conversion, and eventually found a wonderful church family. I also attend AA and NA meetings fairly regularly; I first started attending AA meetings in the late eighties, even though I did not get clean and sober until 1994. There are many other 12 step support groups, and I would encourage you to find something that fits your needs and provides extra support. Give it time, too.

My thoughts on God's plans for humanity? Hmmm, I am a Bible believing Christian and also believe that God knows what He is doing, and what He does is best. To come to faith after almost fifty years of living a lost lifestyle has given me a very good grasp of the problem non-believers have: pride of life, which takes many forms. I am very grateful for the program giving me the freedom to explore my ideas of spirituality, and being allowed to come to my own understanding of God, which no longer varies from what the Bible says. It was a long process for me, which included an adventurous seeking phase that culminated in my having to surrender my opposition to Him. I had many experiences where I know He revealed Himself and His love and forgiveness to me... and some of them completely turned my world upside down, which in the long run has been a good thing. God not giving more life, life everlasting, to those who refuse to acknowledge Him as he giver of life in the first place, is just. (You can find some of my testimony here, and here.)

I am sorry to hear about your twin sister. I do not believe you are supposed to pretend everything is okay when being witness to her self destructive tendencies eat you up inside. Do you pray and seek guidance on how to approach her, how to love her in the state she is in? I know that while I was using drugs, I simply avoided those I thought would run interference. So I understand it is not an easy thing to stand by and watch when you want to help, but you cannot really help those who do not wish to be helped. In fact, the NA and AA literature are pretty clear about that. We begin by asking for help. That does not mean you cannot let her know how you feel about what she is doing to herself, if she is willing to listen.

Changing the subject back to portion control... it is kind of funny how things work out sometimes, don't you think? I gained a lot of weight trying to be healthy by adding more fruits and vegetables into my diet by way of smoothies, but the problem was, the smoothies did not eliminate any meal, so I simply added many calories to my daily diet, and before I realized it, I had gained thirty pounds, yeah, like it just snuck up on me LOL. In years gone by I would have joined a women's workout regimen, and been able to shed those thirty pounds in four months, but due to COPD, I can no longer do that. My daughter is fairly health conscious, as am I, and though I was doing nothing to try to lose the weight, I did start eating frozen foods, because she was buying them for herself. I would buy frozen lasagna that was supposed to be four servings (907 grams) as a side dish, and try to eat only half of it. Sometimes I would eat the whole thing, because leaving a little bit leftover made no sense.

The same thing with a frozen pasta with veggies... it was supposed to be four side servings, but I would eat the whole things as a main course, and that would be my meal, and the whole thing is only just over 400 calories. I began to lose weight, slowly. Eating only half of the lasagna was no longer a problem, and now I can usually only eat about a third of it, and half the pasta with veggies. I had lost 25 pounds before I even weighed myself to see what was what, and have maintained the forty pound loss since Christmas of last year. When I cooked for myself, there was no portion control. My off switch was broken and even though truthfully I was disgusted with how I looked, I was not motivated enough to do anything about it. Now I would like to lose a little more weight, but am not pressuring myself to do so, and feel pretty good about where I am at weight-wise, for the most part. I mostly avoid junk food, though will indulge in organic corn chips with a seven layer dip (I can make a meal of that quite easily) and eat almonds as a snack.

Insanity is a loss of perspective. A healthy perspective is much easier to maintain when you surround yourself with people who acknowledge their faults and work at becoming better people by applying the spiritual principles found in the 12 steps, which are solidly Biblically based. Such people are role models to me. They show me how to live, and are willing to listen to and share with me. I have become much happier and healthier as a direct result of following their lead, reading the literature, finding a church home, and studying Scripture. That is coming a long way from being someone who was hospitalized multiple times for drug overdoses, and feeling suicidal more than once in my life.