Medication for the pain yes or no

Hello all,
I need your help and prayers. I'm going to marital strife due to inappropriate relations on my spouses end and I want to walk away from it al, but I my marriage to work and I want my husband to be convicted not by me, but by the spirit. He's doing everything right for now, but I just wonder how long that will last... I'm constantly on edge and depressed. He wouldn't agree to counseling, but he did agree to a marriage fitness camp or seminar of some sort. The problem is I don't have the energy at this point to care. I'm trying to get back to me. I have this constant burning sensation in my chest went to ER it was not heart related , but stress. I have got to get healthy again mentally and physically. In the past with depression for other issues I have relied on antidepressants and they have helped even with the nasty side effects., but they are awful to get off of...My doc is suggesting Lexapro I have been on it for 3 days and I really don't want to go back down that route, but I'm thinking if I can just get through this pain then I can began to heal and get back to me first and then the marriage( I have given to God). Please put me in your prayers as I am struggling with medication and the benefits vs. taking nothing (maybe St. Johns Wort)weathering the storm and believing that this too shall past. I'm in a real dark place right now in my life not liking who I have become I live for my children...

I pray the lord hold you in his arms an comfort you.Lord help medical problems, Father you are the healer, in Jesus name i pray.amen

Godinme,

I am so sorry to hear about your strife! It is so hard, I know! I have been in your same shoes. I think you have gone through the right steps. Divorce is such a hard thing to face. As Christians, we are taught that divorce is wrong. After all, we have made vows before God. I struggled with that myself, and tried to work things out, as you have done, with my spouse after infidelity and a whole host of other issues on his part. I did the marriage boot camp thing as well, and even tried counseling. After 2 sessions, he refused to go as well. Some people just don't want to or aren't ready to be honest with themselves. I felt stupid for giving another chance, but what I reminded myself and others, is that I could only regret not trying one more time. We owe it to the vow we made God. You do not have to commit to being together forever again, but just start with the seminar. Take it one day at a time. Maybe a spark will come back to you, maybe it wont. What I can say, is that to start, you must FORGIVE. It all starts with forgiveness. From there, it is really up to him. Trust is something that must truly be EARNED back. He is going to have to have some empathy, ask for forgiveness, and be an open book for a while. If nothing else, the forgiveness is for you! You will be amazed at the load that may come off of your shoulder. The stress and pain in your chest, that is from the burden you are continuing to carry around with you. You probably have a lot more. You need to let it go! You need to forgive! Forgiving is not saying what the person did is okay, it's doing what Jesus did, and cleaning their slate.(and yours from carrying it!)
I know it is easy to point the finger and blame our spouse for their infidelity. But have you looked in the mirror (I am not trying to sound mean at all..simply just want you to look outside the box!) and reflected at your marriage and maybe the things you could have done differently? Sometimes spouses unknowingly push each other away and sometimes there are other things involved like pornography and sexual addiction. I think knowing why he cheated is the first step to therapy. It turned out, in my circumstance, after many chances, that he wasn't ready to be a honest and faithful person. I was tired of the emotional abuse and decided my life was better without him. I've been separated for quite a while now awaiting a divorce until I finish school. Your's may be too, but we don't know that yet without trying one more time!
I do have some great books for you to read. The first one, you and your spouse MUST read! It is called" LOVE & RESPECT." I don't remember the author off hand, but you should be able to google it. It is an amazing book for any married couple. "Marriage on the rock" is a book written by my pastor Jimmy Evans and that is also a good read. "I married you not your family" by Linda Mintle is my last recommendation although I know there is many other good ones out there. These should help you to reflect on yourself and on your marriage. It should shed a lot of light on your marriage woes. If nothing else, it is important to address the issues of your marriage now in order to not repeat it in the future.
Lastly, I am sure you ARE a beautiful person. You DESERVE to be loved, respected and someone who will be faithful. We all do! I understand the depression! I would think you were crazy if you weren't depressed. Try to focus all of your hurt into a positive direction. Start eating better, work out (produces feel good endorphins!) and maybe start a new hobby. Your husband may even be shocked to see you moving on in a positive way. This is the best revenge whether you stay together or not. Don't forget, life moves on, but it's direction is up to you! Make it a positive one!
As far as medication, you could try Saint Johns Wart, or even better, 5HTP (another mood supplement) . I would start with making the positive changes in your life and maybe the 5HTP and if your not feeling better in 6 weeks, then I would worry about anti-depressants. Remember, antidepressants can take up to 6 weeks to work. Also, I would start with a SSRI (Selective Seratonin Reuptake Inhibitor), it is a type of anti-depressant, and they have the least amount of side effects. Zoloft is a common one in this category.
Also, start a journal! Get your feelings out! Lay them on paper before going to bed at night. Forgive, stop wearing it on your shoulders! If you go to a counselor, go to a Christian counselor. It would be helpful for you to go with your spouse or even by yourself.
Hope this helps! Keep the faith!

wow1leeannabanana had some good advice.i am not sure what to say to you but I want to reply to let you know i will pray.i too have been in your shoes but unlike leeannabanana I stayed in the marriage. My husband was unfaithful in 1986 and we worked it out I wish i could say it has been smooth sailing since then but at times it has been rough.We have 2 beautiful children and 6 grandchildren.We have served the Lord together and still are very active in the ministry. I have gone through depression and medication also.I was treated for depression for 3 years.I do not have a answer as to what you should do on this subject but I do want to urge you to not let yourself get into too deep of a hole with this.I understand that you hate the medication but do not let this get out of hand.Talk to someone face to face not just on line.Someone besides your husband(having gone through this myself , he may not be as sympathetic or as stable as he might need to be at this time) a doctor or a pastor or a counselor A t the very least reach out to a friend and say the words I AM GOING THROUGH DEPRESSION I NEED HELP!Let someone know you are going through this.Depression is painful .The pain is as real and as paiinful as a cut or a broken arm or a gall bladder attack!I am not trying to be silly,I am trying to make it clear that depression is an illness !When we are in pain we should not ignore it we should get help.DO NOT IGNORE IT SEEK OUT HELP.This is real pain no matter what caused it.My prayers are with you Flossie