Dying to self can be so challenging, so so painful. I believe it is what sanctification is all about.. Vanity, insecurities, pride, selfishness, all of it, block His ability to guide us and to use us, but it is even bigger than that.
Remember those 2 commandments about loving… Well, our ability to love sincerely as we are called is impossible without selflessness. All those beautiful things that make breathing so precious, like love, hope, mercy, peace, joy, connection, longsuffering, and self control require relenting of self. When I think of everytime He has wooed me into the wilderness, He has always taken me to a place of surrender, breaking me so I could truly praise Him. I am so grateful because I want to love well, Him, others and yes myself. I want love to be who I am.
Wait…
Now do you see the problem? There is so much “I” in that way of thinking. Love is who He is. How can I rest in Him, or trust Him, if I am so wrapped up in me? So much “I” going on.. It isn't about me, about my inadequacies, my wounds, my strengths, if I am ok, or am I doing it right, not even where I need to grow, none of it...vanity vanity vanity...me me me. It is about loving Him and others outside of self. It is about Him!!! Thanks be to Him and His tender-mercies, He establishes, teaches, and shows how to sincerely and selflessly love. All of it though has to do with Him, has to be through Him, not me. He is so worthy.
The kind of love we are called to, the only kind of love that is real and not shallow, is sacrificial, humble and selfless. The freedom that comes with His glory requires stepping aside, allowing His glory to shine.
The kind of love that He died for is the only kind of love worth dying for.
Clearly, I still not there... Lord, bring me to Your feet, where I belong, even if it hurts.
Remember those 2 commandments about loving… Well, our ability to love sincerely as we are called is impossible without selflessness. All those beautiful things that make breathing so precious, like love, hope, mercy, peace, joy, connection, longsuffering, and self control require relenting of self. When I think of everytime He has wooed me into the wilderness, He has always taken me to a place of surrender, breaking me so I could truly praise Him. I am so grateful because I want to love well, Him, others and yes myself. I want love to be who I am.
Wait…
Now do you see the problem? There is so much “I” in that way of thinking. Love is who He is. How can I rest in Him, or trust Him, if I am so wrapped up in me? So much “I” going on.. It isn't about me, about my inadequacies, my wounds, my strengths, if I am ok, or am I doing it right, not even where I need to grow, none of it...vanity vanity vanity...me me me. It is about loving Him and others outside of self. It is about Him!!! Thanks be to Him and His tender-mercies, He establishes, teaches, and shows how to sincerely and selflessly love. All of it though has to do with Him, has to be through Him, not me. He is so worthy.
The kind of love we are called to, the only kind of love that is real and not shallow, is sacrificial, humble and selfless. The freedom that comes with His glory requires stepping aside, allowing His glory to shine.
The kind of love that He died for is the only kind of love worth dying for.
Clearly, I still not there... Lord, bring me to Your feet, where I belong, even if it hurts.
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