I did not see your post until just now... and I can relate! I did not think I had a problem with drugs and alcohol either, because I liked drinking and drugging. That is not to say I did not get into trouble, because I most certainly did: hospitalized a number of times, ODs, alcohol poisoning, not to mention doing stupid things while intoxicated, which luckily never landed me in jail or dead, and generally/overall not making wise choices in my life. Being gainfully employed I could keep a roof over my head and pay my bills, so I did not think I fit the profile of an addict or alcoholic despite my many high risk behaviors.
Step one does not say we admitted we had a problem; it says we admitted we were powerless over alcohol, and that our lives had become unmanageable. I went to AA meetings for many years before I could admit I was an alcoholic. In fact, I was eighteen months clean and sober before I embraced the fact that I was not just powerless (I had known that I was powerless over people, places, and things for a long time) over drugs and incapable of managing my own life, but that I was indeed an alcoholic, and that addiction in one form or other had run rampant in my life. It probably would have whether I had I ever picked up a drug or not (alcohol is a drug).
So kudos to you for admitting you have an addiction. The more you understand about the "disease," the more you will understand how it has surreptitiously but dynamically operated in your life as a self-destructive force. As a Christian it is so easy to see the enemy at work in that way. I was not Christian when I got clean and sober, but I was living in a great deal of emotional pain and cried out to God for help. I was attending AA meetings but still drinking... and also going to emotions anonymous. I had been in counselling too, but always sought to keep my drinking and drugging hidden from those I was seeking help from because I did not want to be told I had to stop what I was doing. It was my escape and I did not want to give it up!
So even though I did not think I had a problem with drugs and alcohol despite all the problems they caused in my life, and had not thought I wanted to stop? After crying out to God for help, within days I was directed to the NA program, put down the mind and mood altering substances, got clean and sober, and started working the steps as if my life depended on it, because by then, I knew it really did.