Why Do Things Got To Be So Complicated?

I'm currently feeling lonely. Loneliness next to Sadness and Pain, are the main emotions I experience in life. So I decided why not write about this. It's been on my mind a lot.

I'm just going to use this article as a sample. You women can search and find plenty of similar articles about "What to talk about with a guy".

I"m a guy so I'm using this article as an example:
This one is called:
"What To Talk About With A Girl: 25 BEST Topics (+ 3 Conversation Tips)"
https://www.roadtosolidity.com/what-to-talk-about-with-a-girl

In my experience every conversation i have a with a woman ends up dying. Some die quicker than others. But they all end up dying eventually. In fact it happens to me so often I wonder why I even keep trying or even allow it to happen at all. Of course people will say "Your doing something wrong". Yeah, the problem is always me... lol I got nobody to blame but myself. That way I can feel even worse about my situation.

I'm not saying that I've become "anti woman". But I realize that insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results.

I decided to call this post "Why Do Things Got To Be So Complicated?" because I always felt that if one person is kind to another person, and if they can find similar interests, then things should just work. Instead what I run into is things like.

Me: "How was your day?"
Her: "Oh You know..."

Me: "Do you have any hobbies?"
Her: "No"

Me: "What did you do today"
Her: "Nothing"

Me: "What would you like to talk about?"
Her: "I don't know"

Please don't criticize the format. Not every conversation was engaged that way. i just merely wrote it this way to give you an idea of what I've been dealing with...

Sometimes I might try talking about myself:

Me: I say what I did or are currently doing.
Her: ok or lol.

At least some ladies do better then that! But it is true that I actually had some conversations that went something like that.... And it's just online either! I've had similar responses in real life too. Which is why I started watching and reading dating coaches.

I'm not recommending this book. But here is one I listened too last summer.
"Magnetic - Cultivate Confidence, Become Rejection-Proof and Naturally Attract the Women You Desire"

I guess i wanted to confirm to myself why I hated dating coaches.
1) The advice is really complicated.
2) The man suggests things that I can not physically do.
3) Sex is the end goal.
* As Christians sex in marriage is ok.

I feel like the art of conversation has died. In my experience, I seem to have better conversations with older women. Women who are at least my parents age or older. But with the ones who are my age or younger, just talking to talk, doesn't seem to work. Or not good enough for me.

In my opinion articles and books like "What To Talk About with A Girl" shouldn't even exist!

Yeah I hear you. I kinda get the vibe you are asking for advice about how to talk to girls. What is your age if I may ask? Forgive me if you've said your age somewhere else and I didn't notice. I am 36 years old and not single. Actually I plan to get married asap.

Anyway, you might try a more fun approach to having conversations with girls. Something witty, flirty but clean, and fun. The idea being you really want to get someone's interest and you need to take the lead on this.

If a girl is interested in you enough to talk then your questions for her should be geared more toward being open-ended. I mean, your questions should be worded in a way to provoke stories, provoke discussion, provoke opinion sharing, etc.

Just my opinion, there isn't a right or wrong answer here, just this is what has worked for me.

I'm ashamed to tell you that I'm 43 and I don't know anything.

Seeking_Christ, I have one question for you. Please don't answer in a post here; rather, consider your present plight through the lens of your answer.

What value do you offer, that a woman might consider dating you? (Hint: conversation doesn't qualify; they have girlfriends for that).

The way I see it is they are just not interested in you and/or don't want anything serious (and you certainly don't want to be with someone who is not interested in you, do you?)

I wouldn't take any lack of interest/engagement from women as anything meaningful.
I wouldn't look into any "dating advice" website/book - just be yourself, know who you are in Christ.
There is time for everything and perhaps it isn't time for you to seek/pursue but rather focus on your relationship with God.
Sounding too cliche and doesn't help your situation? Yeah, maybe.

God is the one to decides how much a person is worth!

What does a man have to offer a woman? It's whatever God decides.

While you are correct on this, ...


You are dead wrong on this. The woman decides what is of value to her. Many women value money, status, appearance, and power. Some value character, wit, creativity, or charm. A few value godliness.

In order to attract the attention of a woman, you have to offer something that other men aren't offering, and that the woman considers valuable. Specifically, you need to offer something that she can respect about you.

Self-esteem is not a value you offer; it's a necessity. No woman wants to be the emotional support animal for a man. I strongly suggest that you get some help with your identity issues. God can and will help you, but you will likely need some human guidance through the process.

Twice I had professional help, and both times they said there was nothing that could be done for me.

I'm currently feeling lonely. Loneliness next to Sadness and Pain, are the main emotions I experience in life. So I decided why not write about this. It's been on my mind a lot.

I'm just going to use this article as a sample. You women can search and find plenty of similar articles about "What to talk about with a guy".

I"m a guy so I'm using this article as an example:
This one is called:
"What To Talk About With A Girl: 25 BEST Topics (+ 3 Conversation Tips)"
https://www.roadtosolidity.com/what-to-talk-about-with-a-girl

In my experience every conversation i have a with a woman ends up dying. Some die quicker than others. But they all end up dying eventually. In fact it happens to me so often I wonder why I even keep trying or even allow it to happen at all. Of course people will say "Your doing something wrong". Yeah, the problem is always me... lol I got nobody to blame but myself. That way I can feel even worse about my situation.

I'm not saying that I've become "anti woman". But I realize that insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results.

I decided to call this post "Why Do Things Got To Be So Complicated?" because I always felt that if one person is kind to another person, and if they can find similar interests, then things should just work. Instead what I run into is things like.

Me: "How was your day?"
Her: "Oh You know..."

Me: "Do you have any hobbies?"
Her: "No"

Me: "What did you do today"
Her: "Nothing"

Me: "What would you like to talk about?"
Her: "I don't know"

Please don't criticize the format. Not every conversation was engaged that way. i just merely wrote it this way to give you an idea of what I've been dealing with...

Sometimes I might try talking about myself:

Me: I say what I did or are currently doing.
Her: ok or lol.

At least some ladies do better then that! But it is true that I actually had some conversations that went something like that.... And it's just online either! I've had similar responses in real life too. Which is why I started watching and reading dating coaches.

I'm not recommending this book. But here is one I listened too last summer.
"Magnetic - Cultivate Confidence, Become Rejection-Proof and Naturally Attract the Women You Desire"

I guess i wanted to confirm to myself why I hated dating coaches.
1) The advice is really complicated.
2) The man suggests things that I can not physically do.
3) Sex is the end goal.
* As Christians sex in marriage is ok.

I feel like the art of conversation has died. In my experience, I seem to have better conversations with older women. Women who are at least my parents age or older. But with the ones who are my age or younger, just talking to talk, doesn't seem to work. Or not good enough for me.

In my opinion articles and books like "What To Talk About with A Girl" shouldn't even exist!

Personally I don't think I got anything to offer women. In fact I should probably be thrown in the trash can! But I've kinda already expressed how I have really low self worth in other places on this site! Even my old electronics teacher told me, "you have the worst inferiority complex I have ever seen!"

I guess i wanted to confirm to myself why I hated dating coaches.

eel like the art of conversation has died. In my experience, I seem to have better conversations with older women. Women who are at least my parents age or older. But with the ones who are my age or younger, just talking to talk, doesn't seem to work. Or not good enough for me.