When do you say I love you?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
Oct 21, 2022
79
43
18
#1
In every kind of relationship being expressive with what you feel is very import…to narrow it down lets say in a romantic relationship, one person is super expressive (A) and the other one is not very expressive(B)…A: would always say you are not really sold out in this relationship because you haven’t say I LOVE YOU to me…on the hand B: would say understant I didn’t grow up in very expressive family and promise on our wedding day those are first words I would at the altar and infront of our witness.
Question holding it on not saying this until the big day a right or not?
 

cinder

Senior Member
Mar 26, 2014
4,433
2,418
113
#2
I think that's the wrong question. I think the right question is how badly do you want there to be a big day. A person who is practically begging their significant other to say I love you is unlikely to be willing to wait until the wedding to hear those words.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
4,060
3,173
113
#3
In every kind of relationship being expressive with what you feel is very import…to narrow it down lets say in a romantic relationship, one person is super expressive (A) and the other one is not very expressive(B)…A: would always say you are not really sold out in this relationship because you haven’t say I LOVE YOU to me…on the hand B: would say understant I didn’t grow up in very expressive family and promise on our wedding day those are first words I would at the altar and infront of our witness.
Question holding it on not saying this until the big day a right or not?
I don't think it is a right or wrong type of thing. I think it more comes down to individual relationships.
Some people don't require frequent or strong affections given to them, or they may even find it excessive. They are not bad or wrong for feeling that way.
And since they don't need it given to them they also likely don't feel the need to give it.

Rather it is more an issue of how a couple can handle their differences in how they express love. There may be some people who can handle waiting till their day of marriage to hear this. Personally I am not one of those people that could handle waiting so long. But neither am I going to tell a person who wishes to wait they are wrong, though I do believe it unwise and a bit extreme.
 

HealthAndHappiness

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2022
10,288
4,333
113
Almost Heaven West Virginia
#4
In every kind of relationship being expressive with what you feel is very import…to narrow it down lets say in a romantic relationship, one person is super expressive (A) and the other one is not very expressive(B)…A: would always say you are not really sold out in this relationship because you haven’t say I LOVE YOU to me…on the hand B: would say understant I didn’t grow up in very expressive family and promise on our wedding day those are first words I would at the altar and infront of our witness.
Question holding it on not saying this until the big day a right or not?
Oh come on . Who gave you the idea that you shouldn't say "I love you "until the wedding vows?
I understand that there's the German stoicism that I've seen daughters not so much as hug their daddy or express affection..
I would say that you say those words to your girlfriend when appropriate and enough time passes to make a commitment because this is likely the one you will marry. Just my 2¢.

(That's a figure of speech, just in case someone reading this thinks I'm soliciting for two pennies.)
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#5
?

just say it as soon as you meet anybody, like I love you ...gimme a hug!
Then theres no drama cos you said it first and they get to hug you to show it.
 

Robertt

Well-known member
May 22, 2019
899
320
63
Bahrain
#6
I say I love you as soon as I feel it . But the feelings do come and go so have to remember , love is a promise , not just a feeling

Show the love with more than words .
 
G

Gojira

Guest
#7
In every kind of relationship being expressive with what you feel is very import…to narrow it down lets say in a romantic relationship, one person is super expressive (A) and the other one is not very expressive(B)…A: would always say you are not really sold out in this relationship because you haven’t say I LOVE YOU to me…on the hand B: would say understant I didn’t grow up in very expressive family and promise on our wedding day those are first words I would at the altar and infront of our witness.
Question holding it on not saying this until the big day a right or not?
When do I say "I love you"? Every time I look in the mirror :LOL::ROFL::LOL:
 

Kireina

Well-known member
Aug 26, 2020
1,479
1,404
113
#8
Why would you hold it if you are sure you love that person already.... 🤔

Before marriage,after marriage, anywhere, in whatever situation say "I love you" if you know you really love the person 😊


I love hearing "I love you's" from my man and everytime he says "I love you" to me it melts my heart ❤
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#9
You say you love Jesus, so why cant you love others as Jesus loves you.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,229
2,525
113
#10
In every kind of relationship being expressive with what you feel is very import…to narrow it down lets say in a romantic relationship, one person is super expressive (A) and the other one is not very expressive(B)…A: would always say you are not really sold out in this relationship because you haven’t say I LOVE YOU to me…on the hand B: would say understant I didn’t grow up in very expressive family and promise on our wedding day those are first words I would at the altar and infront of our witness.
Question holding it on not saying this until the big day a right or not?
Words are cheap...actions and attitudes are expensive. Why are you giving the expensive without giving the inexpensive token?

Marriage is a Covenant relationship...the intimacy with a spouse is extremely naked. Before marriage it is extremely important to share your thoughts and feelings on an ongoing basis...they need to know what you think is important...your hopes and dreams....wants and desires...fears.

It's emotional nudity...to the point that physical nudity is a lesser thing.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#11
People sing love songs all the time, but few people can actually sing with all their heart. Mostly they just mouth the words.
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
11,887
8,705
113
#14
God wants to love people through us.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
#15
God so loved the world he sent his only begotten son Jesus, so whoever believes in Him will not die but have eternal life.

If you dont know that you need to hear it! And be open to receiving the love of God. He has so much for us.

when you pray to Him you have a relationship. He doesnt have just one BIG DAY everyday can be the Lord's Day.. TODAY is the day the Lord has made.
 

Krumbeard

Well-known member
Apr 15, 2019
1,139
773
113
#16
?

just say it as soon as you meet anybody, like I love you ...gimme a hug!
Then theres no drama cos you said it first and they get to hug you to show it.
I think there's a stalker thread this would fit in.

I can only imagine how that would go!