Christian romance pt. 2

Are you finding that to be an effective strategy?

I don't think there can be a better answer to the OP!

Another excellent answer!! Very good advice!

Yea . don't dwell in sin though ..because Grace abided .
Hebrews 10:26-27(KJV) For if we sin wilfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth no more sacrifice for sins,
But a certain fearful looking for of judgment and fiery indignation, which shall devour the adversaries.

I fully concur with your counsel.

Not really…

Do you think God is pleased with the content of the conversations that you are having with this man?

Im sure that God finds the conversations most interesting and worth consideration.

How would you know? 😆

Jacki is admitting there's a struggle to keep away from sexual topics with this guy, even though he only wants to be friends. From what I've read there's a big temptation for sexual sin and she doesn't seem to think that temptation should lead to marriage because it would be "unfair".

She's said they're only going to be friends and then admitted there's room for sexual sin. Why are you encouraging her to persue a relationship that will cause sin?

@JackiAsi205

Look, I'm not saying your sexual desires are wrong. They are completely healthy within the context of marriage.

I have an 18 year old daughter and more and more often she's been expressing her desire to marry and start her own family. There's nothing wrong with putting yourself out there and trying to find someone. But, as I've told my "kid", she should stay busy while she waits/searches and seek the council of godly women and her parents when she meets a young man.

And I would never look down on you or your desire for romance because of your age, though it's a given we "older folk" have more life experience and wisdom. We older women are told to teach the younger women (Titus 2:3-5) soooo..

...as an older woman, I would say to move on from this guy. Let him go, he's not ready to be a husband. Concentrate on college, find a good church and/or homechurch. Build your relationship with Christ, first, especially as you mentioned in a different thread that you doubt prayer works.

Are you seeking a godly man to marry or do you just want a boyfriend?

There would be no sin if there is marriage. Paul says it is better to marry than to burn with passion. I am not at all sure though what she means by 'unfair'.

Exactly. But this guy...she's said he's "seen some stuff". I assume, from what she's said, that he is okay with sex outside of marriage. He only wants to be friends with her, yet tells her not to lose hope. He likes another girl, is fresh out of a relationship, and is stringing her along.
Having a sexual desire isn't wrong, per say, but she's saying she's not sure she can avoid sex if she meets this "friend".
This whole scenario is a recipe for disaster and doesn't sound like a healthy beginning for a godly relationship.

The whole thing sounds problematic for sure. Thanks for the insights.

Most of our conversations aren’t based on sexual things

On what are a majority of them based?

Just talking about how our days went and some devotionals we want to do

Have you done any of those devotionals yet?

yes

That’s great. What did you study together?

this is a red flag. He doesn't sound ready. You may have to give him some space and get on with your life and see if he returns.