Dreams... Well, mine do seem to be in conflict with God's will for my life, and it is with that that I struggle... in pain.
* I dream to have a good job.
* I dream to be able to have a good retirement and tell the working world, which has pooped on me over and over again, to stick it.
* I dream for a beautiful woman to come home to every day. The loneliness of my home has become even more acute in recent weeks, and I'm sick of a libido that I must treat like an enemy.
* I want friends & buddies (preferably Christian) here in AZ whom I can hang with. I do almost everything alone.
* I long for a purpose in my life. No, not the generic purpose(s) all Christians have, but one specific to me... one that justifies my existence.
* I long to see my country (the US) kneel before Christ and repent -- this side of the millennial period.
I struggle too brother with chronic pain. I know the struggles of living paycheck to paycheck. The struggles of being a Christian male in a culture dominated by indecency. More and more of us are seeing the ills of the internet generations where social anxiety is on the rise, loneliness has skyrocketed, and many seek devastating alternatives to erase the pain. Satan knows if he can get the 1 to leave the 99 and that 1 ignores the pursuit of Jesus then a lamb alone will fall prey to the predators or the elements of the wilderness. The thorns and vines will choke them out before they are mature enough to know they must abide in the Good Shepherd.
You need not question your purpose as God has made our purpose clear. Share the good news, love God, love those who are lost, speak truth in love, and surrender our will to His will. If God speaks in scripture that we are to forgive then we forgive, if He says to resist temptation then we resist.
But not by our power alone, we lean on the Helper the Holy Spirit who helps in all things spiritual.
The country is evident of sin and evil but that same sin and evil creates a vacuum of desperation due to the absence of true love. It is a void of selfishness and wickedness where true love will not be found.
We understand the loneliness, the pain, the regrets, the failures, and the heartache within the void as we all were brought out and saved from such darkness. Which for us makes it easy to respond. We know what they need even if they do not yet understand or accept they need what we have to offer.
Our country is ripe for either harvest or judgment but either way in a harvest there is a reaping of both the weeds and the tares.